“Still makes you a piece of shit,” Lick says.
Cruise cuts his eyes to Lick. “You think I don’t know that? Because I fucking do! But I’m not the only one who's done shit in their past they ain’t proud of so you can stop right the fuck there. I’ve tried to atone for my sins of that day, and I’m just about done.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Lick bites back.
Cruise doesn’t answer the question.
“This is a bunch of fucking bullshit, man,” Lick groans. “This is a day where we’re supposed to be paying homage to our fallen brother. Bubba gave his life to save my woman, and instead of this day being about him, we’re in fucking Jury dealing with this piece of shit.”
“The list,” Dyke tells me. “The one you asked me to compile?”
“Yeah, the one of the Diablos who was involved in Tessa’s attack. They’re all dead except one.”
Dyke nods his head towards Cruise.
“Are you kidding me?” Lick says.
Cruise laughs then wipe his hand down his face. “I really don’t give a shit what you think of me, Lick. Never have, never will and I think that’s the issue between you and me. You can’t get under my skin like you do with everyone else around here. On top of that, I don’t give a shit if you believe me or not.”
“Then explain it to me, Cruise.”
“I skipped town the next day. I didn’t feel right about what went down, and there was no way I was going to have any of those fuckers turn on me and pull me into their shit if it went down with the cops. No one knew my name. I wasn’t stupid, so I took off. A year after it happened, I met Hopper. He was the VP for the New Orleans chapter. I didn’t think twice about it.”
Lick laughs. “Fucking convenient if you ask me. Seems like you’ve had your eye on Devil’s Fury for some time.”
“His story checks out. I confirmed it before I allowed him to transfer over,” Cut confirms his story.
“As I was saying, I was a year in, and one of the members there started telling me about his career in Special Forces. It was on a run that we were staking out. He kept his mouth running, and I wasn’t about to stop him. He told me some of the shit they did in the middle east. Ways to get rid of the enemy more quietly than blowing them up. His ways of disposing of the enemy didn’t make national news, and that’s the way their commander liked it. They were able to get more done on the down low. It took me an entire year to earn his trust, but I fucking did it.”
“And?” Lick didn’t sound convinced.
“I applied what I learned and took out all those motherfuckers, all but one. He’s a slippery little shit, and I can’t seem to get my hands on him.”
“Tre,” I say.
“Yep, Tre De La Cruz,” Dyke confirms.
“He went underground once he felt the heat of his brothers dying out of the blue. He’s not stupid, and he’s been very good at watching his back and covering his tracks. Of course, I’ve been doing all this shit on my own, and I don’t have the resources to find him.”
I turn towards Cut. “Call a meeting with Louie.”
“Fuck that,” Lick says. “We need to keep our distance from the Diablos.”
“I agree with Lick.” Sin says. “We’re square with them. Even though we’ve put the shit from the past behind us, there’s no reason to continue to trust them. Louie has no reason to give up one of his members.”
“What Tre and those fuckers did to Tessa has Louie Sr. written all over that. Jr. isn’t going to take that shit lightly.”
“He knows what the fuck went down that day, Hawk. It’s his fucking club that did it. Those are his fucking members that are dying left and right. You think he’s going to just hand Tre over to us once he finds out that it was Fury who killed his men? No fucking way.”
“No one is going to tie that body count to me. I made sure of it.”
“There’s got to be another way,” Sin says.
“I’ll call a meeting,” Cut confirms.
“Let’s get this shit taken care of!” Lick slams his hands on the table. “We’re still Fury, motherfuckers! Ain’t no one better forget that shit, either.”
“We don’t know what’s going to happen yet,” Cut says. “I said I’ll call a meeting, I don’t even know if Louie’s gonna take it. Now, we’ve spent enough time on this. We need to head back and put the memory of Bubba before all this other shit.”
No offense to my Prez, but nothing in my life will ever be put before Tessa and Sam again.
Tessa
Last night, after I fainted, I stayed in bed. Bianca told me to rest, and she would take care of Sam. I didn’t fight her on it.
When I open the bedroom door, the smell of coffee and bacon hit my nose. The murmur of voices and the clanking of dishes grow when I make my way towards the kitchen. “Morning,” I greet everyone. I pad over to Sam and drop a kiss on the top of his head.
“I got to stay up really late, Mom,” he says as he kicks his feet back and forth, scooping a spoon full of cereal into his mouth.
“I’m sure that was fun.”
“Here.” Savannah hands me a mug full of dark coffee. “The cream and sugar are right there.” She points to the canisters on the table.
I take a seat next to her little girl and fix my coffee. Grace looks up at me and gives me a full, syrup-filled smile. “Hi, baby.” I tap my finger to the tip of her nose.
“She’ll get you if you aren’t careful. She’s still in the stage of throwing her food.”
“That’s true, she launched her sausage at me already,” Sam tells me. “She’s already got an arm on her.”
Bianca brings a plate and places it in front of me. “Eat, Tessa. I made your favorite.”
I look down and see fried eggs loaded with hot sauce and fresh chilis. Next to them are fried potatoes and grilled pineapple. “Thanks, B.”
“Your thanks will be when you clean your plate. Then you need to get ready because we’ve got an appointment this morning.” She nods and heads back to the kitchen.
“Hello!” A female’s voice comes from the living room. “Where is everyone?”
“In here, mija. You’re just in time for breakfast,” Bianca calls out.
“Oh, Tessa…”
I turn when I hear my name and see Lily standing there. “Lily!” I stand up and give her a hug. “Wow, you’re still so little.”
“I can still kick your butt, so no making fun.” She pulls back and gives me a wink. “I feel awful I wasn’t here yesterday, but I was only able to make time for the funeral. I had clients back to back yesterday.”
She takes a seat on the opposite side of the table, and as soon as her butt hit the chair, Bianca has a plate in front of her. When she gives me back her attention, her eyes are full of sadness.
“How are you feeling?”
I look at Sam, he doesn’t know anything. I’m not sure how to tell him–at least not yet. “Um…”
“We have an appointment today,” Bianca tells her as she takes her place at the table. Pulling a tortilla out of the warmer she rips a piece off and dunks it into her eggs. “We will know more today.” She pops a bite into her mouth, chews, and swallows. “The boys called Doc yesterday and told him. He called the hospital and got your files transferred from Los Angeles. He went over everything, and he was able to get us to a specialist this morning. But first, he wants us to go to the lab,” her eyes cut to Sam, “so they have what they’ll need.”
“Oh, but Sam–”
“I’ve got Sam,” Savannah tells me. “We’re going to head to the school’s office and see what we need to get him enrolled back in school.”
“Yeah, but–”
“No buts,” Bianca says. “No fighting this.”
“I’m not trying to fight it, B.”
“Good, then you also won't fight it when we make a stop after the doctors.”
“What stop?”
“To your parents.”
I push back from the chair and stand
. “I can’t do that today, B.”
“Come on, buddy,” Savannah says as she pulls Grace from her chair. “Let's go get you ready for the day. Show me where your bag is.”
“It’s in the boy’s room.” Sam slides off his chair and runs down the hall.
I stay silent until all three of them are out of earshot. “You can’t expect me to see my parents so soon. This is all moving too fast. I just came to town yesterday, and you’re making me jump in with two feet, and I don’t think I can do that.”
“You don’t have the time to waste, mija.”
“They don’t care, B. They haven’t cared in years.” I lower my voice. “They don’t even know I have a son.”
“That is their cross to bear, Tessa, but they need to know. More than you know. Your mother needs to know.”
“I don’t see why she would care now. I could’ve died years ago, and she would have never known.”
“Let’s not talk in hypotheticals. We need to deal with the realities, and the reality is that you’re sick. As soon as you told me over the phone, I wanted to go and smack some sense into that woman, but I knew it wasn’t my place. It’s your life, Tessa, but your mother needs to know, and you’re going to tell her. Today. You cannot wait.”
I take a deep breath and close my eyes. This is all so much, and I’m not sure I can handle it. Never in my life have I felt so weak.
Hawk
The ride over here from the lab was one full of silence. Bianca took her own car because they have places to go after the appointment and I felt that they wanted to do it on their own. I didn’t know what to say to Tessa to reassure her that everything is going to be okay. I’m not going to lie–I’m freaking out. Now, sitting in the waiting room, it isn’t any better. The waiting room is full of people, some look sick while other seems perfectly fine. My mind wonders if the ones who look well are, in fact, that well. Or maybe their disease hasn’t taken hold of them like it has the others.
I glance towards Tessa who’s sitting next to me. Her head is turned slightly, and she’s staring out the window on the other side of the room. I give her hand a squeeze trying to let her know that she’s not alone, but she doesn’t respond as she continues to gaze out the window. I feel her fight fading, and it scares the shit out of me because the struggle she’s bound to face hasn’t even started.
I lean into her and rest my chin on her shoulder. “Hey.” She turns her head and gives me a side eye.
“I’m sorry.” She nods.
“I love you.” It’s the first time I’ve told her since that night in her apartment a few months ago, and when she doesn’t say anything back, my heart slightly breaks.
“Tessa?”
We both startle when we hear her name being called. A man is standing with a medical chart in his hands is at the door that leads back to the exam rooms. I stand first, pulling her up next to me. When I look towards Bianca, she continues to sit, telling me that she isn’t going to come back with us.
Once we’re ushered into his office, we both take a seat on a cream-colored couch. I take her hand in mine and rest them both on my thigh. He sits next to us and not behind his desk.
“I want to go over your history.” He looks at me. “I noticed on your chart that you aren’t married.”
“That’s correct,” Tessa replies.
“I do see that Mr. Gentry is your emergency contact, but since you aren’t married, and he isn’t family, by law, I have to ask if I have your permission to discuss your condition in front of Mr. Gentry.”
“That’s fine.”
“All right.” He crosses his legs and opens the chart. “It seems that you had childhood leukemia a birth.”
“That’s correct. I was born with it.”
He nods. “Obviously, you went into remission, but since you were so young, I’m sure you’re unaware of what procedure was used to make that happen?”
“I don’t know. My parents never really discussed it when I was younger, and I have since lost touch with them.”
“With such short notice, I haven’t had adequate time to research, and I requested the file first thing this morning, but the hospital’s database shows they don’t have a chart on file. I was hoping you’d be able to shed some light on your treatment, but I guess that isn’t the case.”
“How can they not have it?”
“It was almost thirty years ago, long before charts went digital, so it’s not an uncommon occurrence, just inconvenient.” He glimpses at us before he goes back to the file. “While you were admitted into the hospital this last time, they ran a series of blood tests. They showed at the time you had too many white blood cells and not enough red. An elevated white blood cell count is always a sign that something isn’t right in the body—infection possibly. Your tests showed decreases platelets and some blast cells. Because of the results, they performed a bone marrow test, aspirated a portion of your marrow, and ran a test looking for leukemia cells. That is how your diagnosis was determined.”
He puts the chart down. “What they didn’t do while you were admitted was run any imaging tests and a spinal tap. We’ll need to run those both so we can determine if the cancer has spread outside the marrow. Typically, it will travel to the brain and spinal cord. Once we do those tests, we’ll be able to see where we stand on the fight and what our best game plan is.”
“When does all that happen?” I ask.
“Tomorrow for both. To be honest, because this is a reoccurrence, I feel that we need to move aggressively. Our only saving grace at this point in time is if it’s still isolated to the marrow and hasn’t traveled anywhere else. Tessa, do you have any questions for me?”
“Um,” she clears her throat. Pulling her hand from mine, she wipes them on the front of her jeans. “As of right now, there’s no way of telling me of the likely hood of survival?”
“Correct. We haven’t been able to stage or determine how far along the cancer is. It’s not just the point of saying yes, you have cancer. We have to take other things into consideration, like what type, if this is considered a secondary one, how long since the diagnosis. Once we take everything into factor, then we’ll be able to determine what we do next.”
“All right. So tomorrow then.”
“Yes. You’ll need to check in at the hospital, and I’ll see you then.”
When he gets up, I follow suit. I shake his hand and watch as Tessa does the same. Once we make it to the waiting room, Bianca stands and approaches us, hugging Tessa and whispering words of love the only way Bianca knows how.
Tessa
“How do you know they still live in the same house?” I pick at my nails as I sit in the passenger seat of Bianca’s car.
“Because I know.”
I look out the window and watch the city passing me by. Things have changed in the eight years since I was here. Stores I once knew are gone while others have taken their place. Tracks of houses occupy once empty lots. While I was in LA, change happened on a daily basis, so it wasn’t noticeable. The restaurants would last for a few months then they would close. Buildings were always being painted, and the landscape changed, but it wasn’t a big deal. It was Los Angeles. But looking around the town I grew up in, I feel like an outsider.
But I guess I am.
The car slows as she takes a right turn down a road I know all too well. The neighborhood looks good. The car stops in front of a yellow brick house. The once bare windows are now outlined with white shutters, and the grass is replaced with a more desert theme. Rocks and gravel lie where bushes and plants used to be. Two cars sit in the driveway, neither of them I recognize.
“You ready?”
I glance towards Bianca before my eyes land back on the house. “Do you need me to answer that?”
“Let’s get this over with so we can get home.”
Home.
This was once my home. A place I thought I was loved and safe. A place that housed my family. We spent weekend mornings watching cartoons, and holidays s
urrounding the big wooden table full of laughs and good food. New Year's Eve we’d spend making tamales for the family that we expected the following day for football. My gaze falls on the window to the very right—my childhood room. I wonder what is in that room now.
The slam of a door has me scrambling to open mine. I follow Bianca up the walk towards the house. Before we have a chance to knock, the door opens, and there stands my mother. She looks exactly the same as she did when I was growing up.
“It took you long enough.” Before I can say anything she continues, “Don’t you know you shouldn’t sit in front of anyone’s house these days? Someone will call the cops.”
“I was giving Tessa a moment.”
Silence falls between us, and I grab Bianca’s hand. I want to leave. This is a mistake. My family didn’t care back then, and I know they don’t care now.
“Are you going to invite us in, Gloria?”
She rolls her eyes and unlatches the door, allowing us to enter. “You know where the living room is.”
I make my way through the foyer and notice the change in color. The light-yellow walls are now beige, and the wall that used to be between the living room and kitchen is now gone, making it one large room.
“We had it remodeled two years ago,” my mom says from behind me.
I take a seat on a leather couch. Something else that is new. When I take in the room, I notice that the family pictures are gone, and the bookcases that were on the far wall are also gone. “It looks good.”
She gives me a tight smile before she addresses Bianca. “Can I ask what you’re both doing here?”
“Gloria, stop with your shit. Your daughter has been out of your life for eight years. She’s lived these years alone–”
“Aye, Bianca, she left.”
“Because you told me to!” My hands start shaking. I fist them as I push them into my thighs. “I had no one, and why? Because you were ashamed–”
“It was time,” my mother cuts me off.
“That’s where you’re wrong, Gloria. It was never time. She is your daughter, and she has needed you. You–her parent.”
Hawk_Devil's Fury Book 3 Page 25