Heart Unbroken

by Andrew Grey

  Lee nodded and turned away. He didn’t want Scott or anyone to see his expression now. If Dean could have those guys, he wasn’t going to want Lee. It was nuts for him to have thought otherwise. Dean was nice enough to allow him to work on some interesting cars. That’s all it was.

  “Come on. Let’s get this car finished. Your mom is going to be here in half an hour to pick you up, and we want to be ready.” Scott went back to work, and Lee did the same. He needed to get his head back into this engine, instead of thinking about Dean’s deep, irresistible voice.

  “HEY, MOM,” Lee said that evening as he sat at the kitchen table while she made dinner. Potatoes, beef, and maybe salad. He definitely smelled tomatoes. “Trevor’s friend Dean is joining the business, and he’s going to open a restoration shop with Trevor. He asked if I wanted to work with him.”

  “What about Scott?” she asked as the meat sizzled in the pan. Lee’s belly rumbled at the scent. Man, he was hungry.

  “He and I are talking about both going. I could never work without him.” Lee sighed. “Though I’m probably going to have to learn how to manage without him someday. I can’t expect Scott to work with me forever.” He put his hands on the table. That was one of his greatest fears. Lee loved working on cars, and he loved Scott. Scott had taken him under his wing the first day Lee had come to the garage and had worked with Lee ever since, but Scott didn’t need him. “But I think we’re a good team.”

  “Honey, you and Scott are definitely a good team. Things aren’t one-sided. You could have found someone else to partner with when he was in the accident, but you only grew closer. I used to think the two of you would end up together. He’d such a nice boy.”

  “Mom, things were never like that,” Lee explained, trying not to sound whiny. “And Brent is perfect for him. They make each other happy, and Scott deserves that. He went through so much after the car accident.”

  “No more than you did.” She set down whatever she was working with and placed her hands on his shoulder. “You always see the good in everyone but yourself.” She lightly massaged his muscles. “I wasn’t sure about you working there at all. The only reason I allowed it was because James recommended it.”

  “You allowed it….” He shrugged away. “Mom, I’m not a kid anymore. I need to make my own way. I can cook a little….”

  “You can’t drive, and taking the bus isn’t exactly safe,” she countered. “And you might not believe this, but I want you to be independent and have a life of your own. I keep hoping you’ll meet someone who makes you happy. Not that there’s anything wrong with Brent, but I hope you find someone who isn’t your boss and is about your same age.” This was a familiar topic of discussion. Mom had a thing with the age difference between Scott and Brent. It didn’t seem to matter to them, so why would it to anyone else? But sometimes his mom just had these ideas she wouldn’t let go of.

  “Mom, they’re happy. And Brent doesn’t treat him any differently than anyone else at work. Even the other guys say so.” Lee sat back and waited while his mom finished making dinner.

  “Do you think you and Scott are going to take this job?” she asked as she continued working.

  “I don’t know. I want to. It’s a chance to work on some pretty interesting cars, and it would give me an opportunity to get away from whoever is messing with my stuff.” He instantly wished he hadn’t said anything. Lee hadn’t mentioned about the trouble he was having at work. “It’s nothing. Someone is having some fun with me, and I don’t like it,” he offered before she could get all wound up.

  “Are you sure that’s all it is?” She set his plate in front of him and described where everything was. “I cut up the steak so it’ll be easier to eat.”

  “Mom,” he groaned. “I can cut my own steak.” It wasn’t necessarily easy, but he could take care of himself. Lee knew his mom was trying to be helpful, but he needed to do things on his own. His mom had had a hard time when Lee lost his sight, and she’d really stepped up to help him. He appreciated that—he really did—but the problem was that she kept trying to support him, even when he didn’t need it.

  “Jane,” his dad said as he came in from watching television. “Don’t baby him.” His dad wasn’t harsh, but Lee could almost feel the two of them having a war of looks that he couldn’t see.

  His mother huffed. “Just eat.” She was growing impatient, so Lee picked up his fork and ate. There was no need to make her mad. Besides, she did plenty for him and never asked for anything. Lee didn’t want to make her feel bad. She was trying. Even though it had been five years, they were all still navigating their way around his blindness “Is there someone at the garage who doesn’t like you?” She pulled out her usual chair and sat down at the end of the table.

  “Not that I know about, and there hasn’t been anyone new. Like I said, I think someone is just having some fun with me.”

  “Or they’re jealous,” she offered. “You need to be careful.”

  He held his fork still. “It isn’t Scott, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

  “I wasn’t,” she answered more softly. “If it is some kind of prank, then it’s a mean one.” Lee could only agree with her there. “Have you had an argument with anyone or heard anyone say something they shouldn’t have?”

  Lee shook his head. “Honestly, Mom. I’m just going to be careful and continue working. I think Scott is as excited as me to get the chance to work on some more interesting cars at the new restoration place. I don’t know when it’s going to start, though.” He purposely didn’t go into how Dean was going to run it and how being near the guy made his heart race and his skin flush.

  “Are you feeling okay? You look hot.” She put her hand on his forehead, and he wanted to pull away, but she was too fast. “Maybe you should stay home and rest tomorrow.”

  “I’m not an invalid!” he said with more force than he intended. “I can’t see, but other than that, I’m fine. You need to stop treating me like I’m not all there. I’m not broken.” He might say that, but there were times when he sure as hell felt that way. Like when his tools had been messed with and he couldn’t find anything. The more he thought about it, the more he was sure someone was sending him some kind of message, but it wasn’t one he could read.

  “Jane,” his dad cautioned. “Stop. He needs to be independent.” Thankfully his dad was on his side.

  “Of course you aren’t an invalid,” she said in her usual sympathetic way, which only bothered him even more. He hated that tone. “You can do anything you want to.”

  “I’m going to try, Mom,” he said confidently. Fake it till you make it. “And I was going to ask Scott and some of the guys about going downtown to one of the clubs one night.”

  He heard his mom’s gasp before she could cover it up. “I don’t think that’s the kind of place—”

  “Mom, I want to meet other people like me. Gay people. I want to have a life like other people have. Scott has been to those places and so has James. I was thinking of asking him and Trevor to go too.”

  Her fork thunked on her plate. “Those places aren’t for you. They’re filled with guys who want only one thing, and you aren’t going to be able to see. What if something happens? What if—?”

  “It’s okay, Jane,” his dad said softly. “Lee needs to find a life of his own. We can’t bundle him up in bubble wrap, no matter how much we may want to. Lee, you have to promise to be careful. And make sure Scott is there.”

  Lee nodded. “I just want to be normal for a little while. I want to do things other guys do.” He wiped away the tears that threatened to spill. “I want to have some fun and maybe—just maybe—meet someone who will see something other than a blind guy.” He began eating again and tried to ignore his mom, who seemed to be hyperventilating.

  “But you are blind, and you can’t change that.” She sighed. “Maybe you should start seeing Dr. Hilliard again. He helped you when you were first coming to terms with the changes in your life.”

&nb
sp; “I don’t need a shrink, Mom. I need to go out, meet some people, and maybe get laid.” His mom hated it when he was vulgar. “I deserve a full life, and that means more than work and staying at home. It isn’t fair to me or to you, Mom. You should be spending time with friends, doing things you like to do.”

  “I’m fine,” she said, but her protest sounded lame.

  “I’m not a child, and you’re a wonderful, vibrant adult who has put her life on hold for too long. You’ve stopped living for anything other than me, and that has to stop. I’ll always need you—you’re my mom—but you deserve a life too. You stay here with me all the time, but I think you and Dad should do something together, just the two of you.” He thought that, at times, he was coming between his parents. And that’s the last thing he wanted.

  She chuckled softly. “Sweetheart, I have a life.” Shyness had crept into her voice.

  “Really?” he pressed, unable to suppress a smile.

  “Yes, your father and I had planned to go out on Friday.” She sighed. “So if you and your friends want to go out to one of those bars to meet guys, then as long as you’re safe and watch what you drink and have a designated driver, then I’ll be okay with it.” His mom groaned. “But please, I don’t want to hear about my only baby getting busy.”

  His father nearly choked a little, and Lee figured he was going to join him. He had no intention of telling his mother about his love life… if he ever had one.

  “I think it’s a great idea for all of us to get back out in the world.” Yeah, it could be a scary place for someone who couldn’t see things coming, but it was also exciting, and Lee needed desperately to feel normal again.

  “Sometimes the world really sucks,” his mother said, her tone completely deadpan, and Lee chuckled. He knew that was true, but sometimes it could be amazing. That was the part he was hoping to find.

  Chapter 3

  “NOW YOU want me to go to the clubs with you guys?” Dean asked Trevor on Friday afternoon. He’d just hung up the phone, trying to locate a part for the Cobra. The gear shift was missing, and he wanted to try to get an original to replace it, especially since it was so visible in the interior. But there wasn’t even the hint of one anywhere around. “You were giving me shit about the amount of time I was spending there not that long ago.”

  “James wants to go, and so do some of his friends. Besides, you know more people there than I do.” Trevor had been out of circulation for a quite a while now.

  Dean shrugged. “Sure. But after the lecture I got about my dating habits, I’m just surprised, that’s all.”

  “We’re all going to have fun. Scott is coming with Brent, and so is Lee.” Trevor threw an arm around his shoulder. “Look, man, Lee’s mom has sheltered him since he went blind, and he wants to get out and experience some normal things. James still feels like his mentor and agrees that he should experience the same kind of stuff any other gay guy would. So I thought we’d take him to Dance, Dance, Dance. Let him feel the music and the energy, introduce him to a few people. He can talk and have a good time.”

  “Yeah,” Dean agreed, turning to look out across the shop floor to where Scott and Lee were working. The idea of Lee being available to the guys in the club left his chest tight and his jaws aching from the way he ground his teeth. “I’m free, so I can go. And I’ll talk to one of the bartenders—he’s a friend of mine—so they’ll get looked after. He’ll put the word out to a few people to come say hello. There are some really good guys who show up sometimes.”

  “I can give Dieter a call and see if he and Gerald are planning to come out. He and Gerald love to dance, and sometimes they spend a few hours there before it gets too busy and loud.” Trevor chuckled. “Are we getting old?”

  Dean sighed. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, yeah, they were. And he was starting to feel it, no matter how much he tried to ignore it, acting as young as possible so he could stay attractive and interesting to guys who were more than a decade younger than him. “Sometimes everyone else looks like they’re getting younger.”

  Trevor laughed and squeezed him a little. “I appreciate you doing this. It’ll be like old times,” he quipped.

  Yeah, like old times… sure. Except now Brent and Trevor had partners, and Dean was the third wheel. It was his own fault. After he’d kicked Dumbfuck Chuck out on his ass, Dean had gone on an extended tour of the buffet of men, since he was still young and hot and could attract some of the most interesting guys. But things never amounted to much other than a single night or two, and then he was back out on the prowl. “Yeah.”

  “You don’t have to go if you don’t want to.” Trevor pulled his arm away. “I’m not going to hold your feet to the fire over it.”

  “No. It will be nice.” Dean plastered on a smile to cover his petulance. He went to the clubs to drink and to find someone to get laid, as did most of the guys there. He hated the idea of Lee going there. Trevor had first met James there, and while it would be a lot like lightning striking twice, with his luck it would happen to Lee. Then Dean would have to punch someone, because he wasn’t going to let just any guy take Lee home. Hell, if he had his way, he’d be the one taking Lee home, but Dean had no illusions about that. It wasn’t likely that Lee even knew he was alive, and that was probably for the best.

  “What time?”

  “We were thinking of meeting for dinner at seven. There’s the Greek restaurant on Port Washington. The guys all love that place. After that, we can go on downtown. The club opens at eight. I know it’s early, but the guys can dance and have a little fun without worrying about having too many people around.”

  “Cool. I’ll meet you there.” They were done for the day, having come up with a plan for how they’d manage the restoration business, so Dean figured he’d go home and get ready for tonight.

  He and Trevor had agreed that the restoration company would be a separate business, with the two of them as partners. Dean was finishing up his current projects, and Trevor was finalizing details on the space. Once that was done, they would get the garage set up and move Dean’s larger unfinished projects over. The Cobra was part of the deal, and he and Trevor had even agreed on how they wanted to restore it and use it as a promo before eventually selling it. Everything had been taken care of. And now that Dean had settled his professional life, maybe he could take some time to figure out how he was going to manage his private one.

  DEAN PULLED up to Greco Gyros and parked in front. No one else seemed to have arrived yet. He got out and closed the car door, taking in the warm summer evening. He locked the car and was about to go inside when a familiar throaty rumble grew louder. He waited as Trevor turned the corner into the lot on his Harley, with James holding on behind him.

  Trevor cut the engine, and James climbed off on slightly unsteady legs. Taking off his helmet, James handed it to Trevor and waited for Trevor to take care of the bike. “How are you, Dean?” James asked, stepping closer for a hug. “If you change your laundry soap, you’re going to have to warn me.”

  “I’m good. I see you still love the bike.” Dean released James and hugged Trevor.

  “I do. It’s exciting,” James explained with a kid-like grin. “And it reminds me of when we first met. Trevor gave me a ride home on his motorcycle after an awful dinner with my parents.” He bumped Trevor’s shoulder. “I sometimes think that was when I started to fall for him. I already knew he had a reputation, because a friend told me about him, but I knew he was different then.” James leaned to Trevor. “Would you go inside and get a table?” he asked, and Trevor slipped his arm away and went inside. Then James turned to Dean. “I wanted to talk to you.”

  “Okay….”

  James cleared his throat and took Dean’s arm. “We’ve been worried about you for a while. I understand the whole ‘freedom and having a good time’ thing. I do. But you’ve been doing that long enough, and I think maybe you’re getting tired of it.” James turned toward him. “I might be blind, but I see stuff other peop
le don’t. You always sound tired, and you don’t have any energy most of the time. But you do when you’re around a certain person.” James smirked.

  “How do you know all this?” Dean asked.

  “I listen, and the guys talk all the time. You’re like a bunch of biddies, gossiping over the fence.” He snickered softly. “So I know you like Lee.”

  Dean swallowed but didn’t confirm or deny James’s statement.

  “Gonna take that route? Okay. I can play that game,” James said, sliding his arm away. “But I was only trying to help.”

  “Dammit,” Dean muttered.

  “Let me just say this. If you want Lee to see you, you’ll have to be the one to reach out to him. Trevor was smart enough to be willing to help bridge the gap between us.” James patted his shoulder. “You’re a good man under that hound-dog exterior. Lee isn’t going to judge you by how you look, but by how you act. So you’ll have to work a little harder and let him see you. A peacock attracts his mate’s attention by his tail. And you have one hell of a tail.” James slapped his hand over his mouth and started laughing. “I didn’t mean it that way, though you could have the best tail on earth. I wouldn’t know.”

  Dean tried not to laugh and ended up snorting. “Okay. So how do I do this?”

  “I don’t know. Trevor took me for a ride on a motorcycle and helped broaden my horizons. He made me hungry for more than I had already. You and Lee both love cars and engines, so think of something that will be memorable. And for God’s sake, make the effort, because if you don’t, someone else will.” James turned and, without any help, pulled open the door and went inside. Trevor guided him over the table and sat down next to him, while Dean waited for the others and took a moment to think.