Heart Unbroken

by Andrew Grey

  “Nope,” Brent said. “I swear, Dean was on a tear, pushing past everyone on the dance floor to look for you.” He put an arm around Scott. “Is your head clearing?”

  “Yeah. It feels better, and I don’t think I’m going to be sick anymore.” Lee leaned against Dean’s car, and Dean kept an eye on him. Hopefully he’d be okay. Whatever he’d been given seemed to be working its way out of his system pretty quickly, which was a relief. “I feel stupid, though,” Lee added. “I didn’t think people could be that horrible. I mean, I never met the guy before.” He paused and took another deep breath. “But I don’t want to make a big deal out of this. Please, Dean, I’m okay. I just feel really stupid.” He stood up a little straighter.

  Damn, the way he held himself after going through that was impressive. “You were targeted and taken advantage of,” Dean said so Lee could hear. He really wanted to reassure him. “It wasn’t your fault. If anything, it was mine for not protecting you better.”

  “No, Dean. It was that guy’s fault for being a jerk. It was frightening, but I’m okay now. This isn’t the first time someone has tried to take advantage of the fact that I can’t see. I’m just glad you got there in time.” The only hint that he was nervous was the way his hand still shook, and that was easing.

  “Is anyone else hungry?” James asked, probably trying to change the subject and give Lee a chance to calm down, which wasn’t a bad idea.

  Dean wasn’t sure if Lee was up for going anywhere. “Do you want me to take you home?” he asked Lee.

  “No. My mom will freak out if she sees me like this. She didn’t want me to come in the first place. If she finds out what happened, she’ll start keeping me inside and try to protect me even more. I know I was dumb, but I don’t want to be shut off from the world.”

  “Okay.” Dean turned to the others. “We could all go to my place.” He tried to remember if the place was clean enough. “I’ll stop at the store and pick up a few things, and then we can all eat there.” He wasn’t a great cook, but tonight he didn’t think it mattered.

  “Scott and I will do the same, and we can all meet you there,” Brent agreed.

  “Do you want to ride with me?” Dean asked Lee. “If you want to go with Scott and Brent, I’d understand.” He wanted Lee to feel comfortable.

  “I’ll go with you.” He took Dean’s arm, and Dean guided him to the car, then opened the door so Lee could get inside. “I expected you to drive one of the older cars you restored.”

  “I can’t afford to keep one of those. I have owned some amazing cars over the years, ones I’ve restored, but selling them again is how I make some of my money. The rest comes from working for others.” Dean closed Lee’s car door once he was inside, then went around to the driver’s side. He climbed in, and as soon as Trevor pulled out, he did the same, turning around the block and heading north, out of the city.

  The trip to the store didn’t take too long. “Do you want to come in with me?” Dean asked.

  “No. I’ll stay here. It will be quicker for you to get in and out.” Dean got out and clicked the door locks.

  The deli was just closing, but he managed to get a few salads and grabbed some appetizers he could put in the oven. He already had plenty of drinks at the house, and after going through the self-pay line, he rejoined Lee in the car.

  “It won’t be long before we get to my place from here,” Dean said, dropping the bags in the back seat.

  “I’m okay. I often sit in the car when Mom needs to do her running.”

  That seemed so sad to Dean. “You don’t need to feel like you have to. Next time, I’ll take you in with me. I don’t really care how fast or slow we go.”

  Dean was starting to get a pretty good picture of the kind of life Lee had. He had met Lee’s mom on a few occasions, and she’d been intensely protective of Lee, which was good as far as he was concerned. Still, the more he thought about it, the more he came to realize that Lee didn’t need protecting. What he needed was someone willing to help him navigate a sighted world while experiencing what it had to offer. Maybe Lee’s mother’s concern was starting to make Lee feel like a burden, so he did whatever he could to make his mother’s life easier, including sitting in the car while she went into stores. Or maybe he felt he was just that big a hardship in general. The idea really pissed Dean off. Lee was a gentle, kind, patient, strong man who needed to have those qualities nurtured, not tamped down.

  Dean scoffed to himself as he started the engine. Look who was talking. If Dean was honest with himself, he’d have to admit he’d spent the last three years looking for validation in the arms of dozens of men. Maybe he needed to look a little closer to home.

  “It’s easiest for everyone,” Lee said, confirming Dean’s suspicions.

  “Bullshit,” Dean retorted. “You don’t need to do what’s easiest for everyone else if it means sitting out in the car waiting while everyone else gets to do stuff.”

  “You sounded like that cowboy guy for a second,” Lee commented.

  “Sorry. But you should experience everything that life has to offer. You aren’t going to do that if you’re the one left sitting in the damned car.”

  “Are we really talking about me waiting for you while you went into the store?” Lee seemed bemused.

  “No.” Dean paused a second to make sure he had his thoughts in order. “Let me ask you a question,” he said as he turned onto the main road. “Have you been hiking since the eye disease took your sight?”

  “Nope. I might get lost.”

  “It’s supposed to be a nice day tomorrow. We could go out to the Audubon Center. They have well-groomed trails and lots of birds and other things. It’s right on the lake, and we could take our time.”

  “Don’t you have to work?” Lee asked.

  “Yeah. I’m trying to finish up a few projects, so I’ll work until noon. But I can pick you up for lunch and then we can go for a walk and talk.” Dean also had some other ideas of things they could do, but he wanted them to be a surprise. “Is that okay?”

  “Okay,” Lee answered.

  Dean glanced over as Lee bit his lower lip. “What are you nervous about?” That poor lower lip was taking a beating tonight.

  “I don’t know. I get this way about new things. I want to do them, but I just get a little antsy sometimes. Mom is always cautioning me to be careful and not take chances, but you have to in order to see if you like something new, right?”

  “I like to think so, but then I can better see things coming. It must be hard to get comfortable in a world that’s constantly changing, which means that you can only navigate familiar places on your own.” So many of the limitations of Lee’s world were coming into focus. Maybe not limitations—challenges. If Lee wanted to experience new things and broaden the areas that he already knew, it would take more effort than it would for someone else, like Dean, who could simply go out and explore. “If you really want to go, then I’ll be there with you.” Dean was also realizing the kind of trust he was asking of Lee.

  “I want to go,” Lee said more forcefully and with some confidence. “Being outside sounds like fun.”

  “Good. I’ll pick you up at one o’clock, if that works.” Dean turned into his driveway and pulled to a stop in front of the garage. There were three bays, and each held one of the cars he was working on inside. “Give me your number,” Dean asked. Once Lee told him, he put it into his phone, then called Lee’s so he would have his. Dean got the bags from the back, then went around to Lee’s side of the car and guided him into the house.

  His living room wasn’t fancy, and he’d had some of the furniture for years. The sofa was slipcovered to mask the floral fabric underneath, but it was comfortable and sturdy. “Will the others be here soon?” Lee asked as he sat down.

  “Yes. They just messaged that they’re five minutes away. I’m going to get these appetizers in the oven. Do you want a beer or something? I have the stuff to make a gin and tonic, if you want.”

 
“Just water. I’m a little dehydrated and still not quite feeling normal. But I’m better. Whatever he had in there worked through my system pretty fast, but I’m still sluggish.”

  Dean went to the kitchen, placed the bags on the counter, and took out some cookie sheets. He heated the oven and got the appetizers inside, then set a timer on his phone. Then he got a couple of waters and returned to Lee, placing one in his hand. Dean sat across from Lee in his chair. He was breathtaking, his head turning from side to side as though he was taking in the room.

  “The house feels a little different from others in the area.”

  “This is where I grew up. My mom and dad moved to North Carolina to retire. They love it there, and when they moved, they deeded the house over to me. My dad and I used to work together out back. He is as car crazy as I am.”

  “Did he do restoration too?” Lee asked, sipping from the bottle of water.

  “No. He was a gifted mechanic, like you. He just loved working on cars. Once I was old enough, he and I worked together in the restoration business. He specialized in the mechanical work, and I did the body and upholstery. Then we worked on electrical and stuff like that together. Maybe tomorrow, if you like, I can show you around.”

  “I would.” Lee smiled. “I think the others are here.”

  Dean heard the crunch of tires on the gravel driveway and opened the front door, leaving the screen closed. He went to check on the appetizers, then greeted everyone when he returned to the living room.

  Scott sat next to Lee, the two of them touching. “Are you better?” Scott asked, and Lee nodded, then began signing. It was like he was talking with his whole body as well as his hands.

  “They’re pretty amazing, aren’t they?” Trevor said.

  “Yeah, they are.” He was a little jealous at how in tune with Lee that Scott seemed to be. It almost seemed as though they could read each other’s minds, at least a little. He wished he had that kind of connection with someone. “You want a beer or something?”

  “Is it in the usual place?” Trevor asked, and when Dean nodded, he went to grab some drinks for everyone.

  The timer on Dean’s phone went off, and he got the things out of the oven and put them on serving plates before carrying them to the coffee table, along with napkins and some paper plates. Scott helped Lee, and once everyone was set, Dean joined them.

  “I called a friend of mine on the Milwaukee PD and explained to him what happened,” Trevor said. “I gave a description of the guy. They said they’d heard of a lot of things like that happening lately. There are more and more sexual predators out there these days.” Trevor gently touched Lee’s knee. “This had nothing to do with you. It’s about the fact that the guy can’t take no for an answer. There’s definitely something wrong with him, and I’m sorry he spoiled your evening. If any of us had known, we wouldn’t have taken you there.” Trevor sighed.

  “It’s okay. I got to dance, and I talked to a few people, though I didn’t get to meet your friends Dieter and Gerald.”

  “I’ll be sure to introduce you the next time they stop by the garage. They’re very interesting people. Dieter’s grandmother left him an interesting legacy.”

  “Is he the guy who was in the paper a few years ago because he got those family paintings back?” Dean asked, and Lee set his glass aside.

  “I got to see those. They are in the art museum, right? Mom took me when I was maybe fourteen or fifteen. I was losing my sight then, but she took me to all kinds of places so I could see as much as possible. They were pretty awesome.”

  “They are. He has some of them in his house because they are very personal to him,” Trevor said. “One is a picture of his grandmother when she was young.”

  “I got to see that one,” Lee said, blinking as though he’d become aware of his eyes once again. “I sometimes think about those paintings and the other things my mom showed me when I….” Lee sighed. “I used to wonder what I’d done wrong to have gone blind.”

  “That happens a lot,” James supplied.

  “People really think that going blind or deaf is some sort of punishment?” Dean asked. That was hard for him to believe, but then who was he to tell someone else what to think.

  Brent signed for Scott.

  “Yes,” Scott agreed. “I wondered what I’d done to deserve this after my accident.” He patted Lee’s arm. “He helped teach me that things happen sometimes just because they happen.”

  “Shit happens,” Lee said with a shrug. “And then you figure out a way to slog through it and try to live a good life.”

  Dean grew quiet, inwardly chiding himself. Shit had happened to him too, when Chuck cheated. But instead of going on, he’d veered off into a life of clubs, drink, and sex with people he didn’t really care if he liked. Dean hadn’t been interested in anything but the physical. It was easier that way—no emotional entanglements. That was, until he’d first seen Lee just after he’d started working at the garage.

  God, Lee had been young then, so Dean had turned away, doing his best to put him out of his mind. Unfortunately, that only drove him to the clubs and deeper into what he’d thought was a happy, easy lifestyle. He could work, spend time with friends, and go to meet guys he could have sex with. Easy, no attachments…. And it had worked—until his best friends all found partners and he was left out in the cold. Damn, he envied Lee for his strength and courage, because that’s what he had to have to go on and take chances, to put himself out there.

  “You’re quiet, Dean,” Lee said.

  “Maybe a little,” Dean said softly, self-realization washing over him. He had always thought he admired strength and courage, but when push had come to shove, he’d abandoned them for the sexually easy and emotionally expedient. “I’m sorry. Are you feeling up to eating something?”

  Lee nodded, and Dean got him a few nibbles, then placed the plate in his hand. Scott took over describing where things were to Lee, and he slowly ate. Dean was grateful that Lee couldn’t see him watching him, taking in the way his lips closed around each morsel and how Lee nipped at his fingers to remove any lingering crumbs.

  Trevor left the room, and Dean followed him into the kitchen. “What can I get you?” Dean asked.

  “Nothing but your intentions,” Trevor said with more formality than he’d ever heard from his friend.

  “Did we enter a Downton Abbey time warp?” Dean asked, trying for a bit of humor.

  “You know what I mean. What do you intend to do about Lee? He’s been through a lot.”

  “And I haven’t?” Dean pressed, talking softly but intently.

  Trevor stepped closer, his bigger bulk looming over Dean a little. “What you’ve been through is largely self-inflicted. Yeah, Chuck was a shit, but that was four years ago. During that time, you’ve been indulging in this play-gay-boy life for all it’s worth, while he’s been trying to figure out who he is and how he fits into the world. So yeah, I want to know what you’re intending. If this is just another conquest, I suggest you back away now and leave him alone. Go find someone else to have fun with.”

  “Or what?” Dean asked, thrusting his chest forward.

  Trevor did the same, the two of them like bulls going head to head.

  “You can stop now,” James said, his hand on the doorframe, probably for reference. “I can smell the testosterone all the way in the other room. Whatever you two are doing, step down and back off.” He extended his hand. “Trevor, let Dean be. Whatever happens between him and Lee is his and Lee’s business.”

  “But—” Trevor said, and Dean couldn’t help smirking.

  “And you….” James turned to him, and, damn, in that moment, he never would have believed James was blind. “Lee is a spectacular symphony about to burst into full brilliance, and you had better treat him that way. Now both of you stand down.” James came over to Trevor and went right to his side. “Get whatever you want to drink and then come join the rest of us.”

  Dean took the opportunity to slip out o
f the room because, dang, sometimes James could be scary. He sat back down and made sure everyone else had food and drinks while Lee talked about a book he was listening to.

  “I found this really long audiobook. It’s hours and hours, and I’m only halfway through, but it’s really good. The Pillars of the Earth. The audio performance is older, but it’s really awesome. I have The Fault in Our Stars too.” He grinned. “I’m going to listen to that next.”

  “Man, that’s like story whiplash,” Brent said as he signed for Scott.

  “Lee likes all kinds of books, and his Audible subscription burns up a lot of his pay.” Scott squeezed Lee around the shoulders.

  “I know. It’s the only way I can enjoy them.” Lee shrugged. “It’s just different now. I have headphones and I listen when I can.” He took a bite of the quiche and hummed. “I love bacon.”

  “Me too,” Dean agreed.

  “Do you need to let your mom know where you are?” Scott asked, and Lee patted his arm, then pulled out his phone and dictated a message before sending it.

  “Mom worries too much. I’m surprised she hasn’t called a few times already,” Lee said with a wicked grin. “Though tonight she’s out with my dad. I hope they’re having a good time.”

  “God, I can imagine it had to be pretty hard for all of you, adjusting to that kind of change,” Dean said.

  “It’s all cool now. She’s been there for me far longer than she should have had to.” Lee carefully set down his plate, searching a little for the coffee table. “My dad….” He nodded his head. “He’s great, but he works quite a bit, so Mom had to put her life on hold so I could learn to function in my changed world. She was the one who saw to it that I got to special schools, and stuff like that.” Lee sat back, and Dean took his hand. It had to have been awful, relearning just about everything. Dean didn’t have a clue what to say. “I think my decision to go to a club tonight was a real shock to her,” Lee continued. “Mom’s protective, and it’s hard for her to accept that I’m an adult… at least until now.” He sighed. “She and Dad deserve to have their own life again.”