No Regrets

by Mari Carr

  “Sunshine,” he started, prepared to warn her once again before his control slipped away.

  “Now.”

  He entered her to the hilt in one thrust. Gasping, she didn’t have time to catch her breath before he continued his assault. He’d warned her he couldn’t, wouldn’t, be gentle, but this? This was sheer bliss. She held tightly to his shoulders as his pounding became more forceful, more exciting. Every nerve ending in her body screamed with ecstasy, with a pleasure-pain she’d never experienced before. Screaming for more.

  More.

  Surprisingly, she realized she’d made the request aloud. Yelled it at him actually.

  “More.” She scratched his back, biting his lower lip as his mouth descended to hers. “More.”

  Grabbing her ankles, he raised them to rest on his shoulders, never ceasing his movements, thrusting into her as if his life depended on being inside her at that moment.

  “God, sunshine, now,” he coaxed. His words served as the trigger, and she felt herself fall into the abyss as her orgasm shook her to the core. He followed her into the void, yelling her name as he plunged, his body covering hers heavily. For several, heart thumping moments, neither of them moved as the power of the moment, the force of their shared rapture rendered them weak.

  Then, he lifted himself to her side, and she sensed he was ashamed of his rough treatment.

  “Vee,” he started, but she cut his apology off with a sweet, soft kiss designed to show him that she enjoyed his attentions. Quite a lot. And she’d enjoy some more if only she could find the strength to move.

  “Marry me,” Ben whispered, shocked when the words escaped. Then he realized no thought was necessary. Only she was necessary. Necessary in his life, his house, his bed. She was everything he’d never hoped to find. She knew his weaknesses and accepted them, accepted him. She’d raised him up out of the depths of darkness and brought him out into the full, bright light of the day. She was his sun and moon wrapped into one beautiful, clumsy package.

  Caught up in the excitement of his own personal revelation, he didn’t notice the look of utter dismay that crossed her face.

  When he did, his heart plummeted. Her memory had returned. With it, she now had a past as well as a present. Was there something in that past that wouldn’t allow her to stay?

  Surely, she wouldn’t have come to him tonight, she wouldn’t be naked in his arms, if she were engaged to someone else. Would she?

  “Tori—”

  “I need to tell you something. Something about my past, about who I am.”

  He tried to lighten the look of pure anguish on her face. “Surely it can’t be as bad as being a prostitute.”

  She smiled weakly at his jest. “I don’t know. It may be.” Again, she paused. Obviously she was afraid to utter the words. He was consumed with fear of her unknown past.

  “Perhaps it would be best if you simply said it. I’m sure it can’t be as bad as you fear. You aren’t engaged to be married? In love with someone else?” The idea of losing her to another man was the worst thing he could imagine.

  “Good lord, no.” Indignation crossed her face. “Do you think I would be here with you like this if I were in love with someone else.” As she spoke, she gestured at the two of them naked and together on the rough bed. “What kind of woman do you think I am?”

  “Not that kind,” he added. “Dammit, Vee, just tell me. Tell me what could be so bad that you think it would make me not want to marry you. Because I can assure you, I can’t think of a damn thing myself.”

  “I’m not from here.” She stumbled over her words.

  “I assumed that,” he added, when she didn’t continue to clarify. “I mean Hayley and Erin are both from America, and although you speak with a bit of a British accent, I understand that you’re American as well. I can assure you, love, that doesn’t warrant concern. Although the grand dames of the ton prefer titled lords to marry their own daughters, it’s not unheard of for a nobleman to marry an American lady. Look at Jack and Alex, for example.” He smiled, taking a deep breath of relief, pleased to think her concerns for their future were so easily overcome.

  “Unless you wish to continue living in America.” The idea she would prefer to live in another country caught him unaware for a moment as he considered the possibility of moving across the ocean. He continued to ponder the idea until she spoke.

  “No,” she reassured him. “I don’t wish to live in America. And society’s strictures about whom you should marry don’t concern me overly much either. Although as the son of a duke, I think my background, or actually lack of background, will be a detriment.”

  “Explain.” The gnawing in his stomach returned with a vengeance.

  “As I said,” she repeated, “I’m not from here. And I don’t mean simply America or Britain. I mean I actually live in both of those places, but not really. Oh dear,” she sighed. “This is not, what I mean to say is I, I’m—”

  “Good God, Vee, what? You are what?”

  “I’m from the future.”

  She spoke so quickly, he wasn’t sure he’d understood.

  “Pardon me?”

  “I’m from Fernwood Grange. My parents own it, only not in this century, but the next, or well, no, that’s not right, it’s the one after that.”

  “You’re rambling.”

  “I used to spend summers with Hayley and Erin in America, but before the, um, incident at the oak,” she said for lack of a better word, “I was living in the year 2009. I was born in 1985, so you see, Ben, I think that is quite a bit worse than merely being engaged to someone else, although I can assure you I’m not. Men of my time don’t even glance in my direction. I mean not that I’m hideous or anything. I’m just kind of shy and, well, oh hell, you don’t believe me, do you?”

  Her incoherent explanation left him with an aching head to match the gnawing pain in his stomach and more questions than answers.

  Surely in the last two months, he would have realized if she were insane. And the fact of the matter was, despite her disjointed speech, he believed her to be totally in command of all her mental facilities.

  “I’m not crazy,” she interjected, as if she could read his thoughts.

  “I didn’t think you were.”

  “Of course you do. How could you not? I’m saying these utterly preposterous words, and I think I’m insane. But Ben, however I arrived here, I promise you it was from the year 2009.”

  “And Hayley and Erin?” He hoped mentioning her friends might bring her back to her senses. The countess and marchioness would prove the lack of veracity in her outlandish tale.

  “They’re from the future as well. Erin disappeared in 2007 and Hayley the following year. I was able to piece together where they’d gone and I followed.”

  “I suppose time travel is perfectly normal in the future?” He was slightly appalled with himself for actually encouraging her to continue with this farce. What the hell could she be hiding that would cause her to resort to such a peculiar story?

  “Good Heavens, no,” she answered, unaware of his growing anger. “No one there will believe me, either. I mean, that is, if I’m able to return.”

  “Return? You’re planning to return—” he paused, before choking out the next words, “to the future?”

  “I don’t know.” She sat up, studying his face. He was certain she could read the disbelief and frustration there, but he didn’t care. He’d given this woman his heart and here she was ridiculing his marriage proposal with the most deceitful narrative he’d ever heard.

  She was from the future?

  Right and he was King George’s illegitimate lovechild.

  “You don’t know?” he replied hotly. “I must confess I’ve always had a longing to travel to the future. Why don’t we pop ahead a couple of hundred years and take a grand tour? Perhaps we could squeeze in a journey to the moon while we’re at it.”

  “You don’t believe me.” She was clearly hurt by his words. “I’m not
surprised. In fact, I understand, and I don’t blame you at all.” She rose from the bed, crossing the room to the fireplace. Bending down, she scooped up her clothes, dressing quietly.

  “You don’t blame me?”

  She shook her head, as if trying to excuse his lost temper, as if she was humoring him, as if his response to her ridiculous lie was irrational. Her attitude drove his hot-temper even higher.

  “Don’t you dare pretend to be the injured party here! You stand here spouting the most ridiculous nonsense I’ve ever heard and then have the effrontery to be hurt when I don’t believe you. Dammit, Vee, if you don’t want to marry me, a simple ‘no’ would suffice. Believe me!”

  “I don’t blame you for being skeptical. I mean traveling to another time simply isn’t done. Not in this century or in mine. And I can’t explain to you how I was able to pull off this incredible magic trick.”

  Nearly dressed, she glanced through the shutters at the front of the cabin, the sound of the rain falling heavily outside. She was obviously trying to discern whether or not she could safely attempt a return to the Grange.

  “Don’t even think about it,” he growled. “You aren’t going anywhere tonight in that storm, and you’ve wasted your time getting dressed as well because I refuse to watch you catch your death of a cold sitting around in a damp dress regardless of your prevarications.”

  “My lies?” Tori seldom lost her temper at home, but with Ben, she had no difficulty letting loose. The stress of the day had taken her to the brink. “Lies,” she repeated, her voice shrill with anger. “That’s right, Ben, you’ve found me out! I’m nothing, but a liar and not even a very good one at that. I mean of all the asinine tales I could have told you to explain my past, I come up with a far-fetched tale about being a time-traveler! Don’t want to believe that? Well then, how about this one? I’m a gypsy, desperate to enter your elitist world.” Angry tears began to fall as she spoke. “No? You don’t like that one either? Well, let’s try this one. I’m the queen of Timbuktu, and I’m here on a secret mission as a spy. Do you believe that?” Voice breaking, she crossed to the door, trembling, her heart shattering into a thousand pieces.

  “And as well as a liar, I am a complete idiot.” She turned to face him, tears streaming down her face. “An idiot to think that in the past two months we had become friends. No, more than friends! Lovers! I’ve helped you rebuild your home, hire servants, overcome your painful past, as well as battle depression. I’ve cared for your daughter and tried to help you become a good parent to her. I risked my life to save hers. I gave myself to you. I gave you everything, my body, my heart, my soul. I, I—” she stopped, unable to continue as a painful lump clogged her throat.

  Ben stared at her, speechless. Shame suffused him as he considered everything she said. It was true. All of it. She had done all that and more, and here he was calling her a liar when all she asked for was his faith, his trust in her. The same faith and trust she’d given to him time after time in spite of how undeserving of it he was.

  Regardless of how crazy her account appeared to be, his Tori, his Vee, was not crazy. Whether she truly believed she was from the future or was merely overwrought after all she’d been through, she deserved to be treated better by him.

  Rising, he approached her slowly as she struggled to contain the sobs that were wracking her body. He’d made her cry too many times. He made a silent vow to himself these would be the last tears caused by him she would ever shed. Wrapping his arms around her shaking body, he grasped her tightly in the shelter of his arms. He expected to her to pull back from him, to reject him, but as always, she managed to surprise him by unfolding her own arms to cling to him.

  How long the two of them stood by the fire as she cried softly, Ben had no idea. All he knew was he loved her, and no matter what lay in her past, it was only her future he cared about. The future they would build together.

  Chapter 22

  V is for Vitality

  Dawn peeked through the shutters in bright rays of sunshine. Ben awoke with a start, sensing they were no longer alone in the cabin. Opening his eyes, he discovered Alex and Jack standing inside the door, studying him. Both were scowling with their arms crossed, and he grimaced. He and Vee were completely naked under the thin blankets and she was wrapped around him, her arm across his chest and one leg slung over his thighs, her head resting on his shoulder. No one with half a brain would doubt for an instant that the two of them had been intimate.

  Recalling the previous night, he attempted to hide his gloating grin. After consoling her, Ben had taken her back to the small bed where he’d made love to her twice more, keeping her up well into the wee hours of morning. He suspected a gun being fired next to the bed wouldn’t rouse her.

  Unwilling to embarrass his timid lady, he slowly extricated himself from her embrace, careful not to wake her. Escaping the bed, he pulled on his trousers, silently motioning for his friends to precede him outside. They could and probably should beat the hell out of him for this, but he refused to allow her to witness it.

  Braced for a thrown punch, he walked out into the sunshine, hands outstretched.

  “Before you say anything,” he started, halting any unsavory accusations his friends may toss at him, “I asked her to marry me. I love her and want to spend the rest of my life with her.”

  “So she’s agreed to stay and not return to her time?” Alex asked the question so casually Ben had to lean against the wall of the cabin in order to stay upright. He’d dismissed her outrageous claims, blaming them on the stress of yesterday’s events. Now Alex was corroborating the tale.

  “What did you say?” Ben shook his head to clear away the gray spots appearing before his eyes.

  “He asked if Tori has agreed to stay here, rather than attempting to find a way back through that blasted tree to the future,” Jack answered.

  Flabbergasted, he looked from one friend to the other. Was he awake? Perhaps this was a dream and he was still in the small bed with Tori.

  His friends studied his stunned response before they burst into laughter together.

  “What’s so funny?” Ben asked, torn between anger and confusion.

  “She told you, didn’t she? And you didn’t believe her.”

  “Of course, I didn’t believe her,” he responded, anger suddenly winning out. “Who could believe such an incredible story?”

  “Me for one,” Jack answered, his laughter now under control. “My wife doesn’t lie.”

  “Neither does mine,” Alex added.

  “Ben, you’re simply going to have to take our word for it. Those three ladies are from the future. Roughly one hundred and ninety years in the future,” Jack said.

  “Jack. It’s impossible. There is no way—”

  A small voice behind him cut him off. “You still think I’m lying.”

  He turned to find Tori in the doorway. Her hair was tousled and her dress wrinkled. She’d dressed in haste, but he thought she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen until he looked into her sapphire blue eyes. Then he cursed his wayward tongue, seeing the anguish on her face, the beginning of tears forming in her lashes.

  “No,” he replied, “I don’t.”

  “But you just said—” she continued, stopping suddenly, her voice breaking. “After last night, I thought—”

  “Dammit, Vee, listen to me. I’m a fool.” He was anxious to console her, wishing he could take back his hasty words. He’d simply been bowled over by his friends’ admissions. They believed. They’d heard the crazy story from their own wives and they believed it.

  “No, you’re not.” Her sudden fury cut him like a knife. “That seems to be the role I’m playing. Alex, would you mind escorting me back to the Grange?”

  “Vee, wait.” He reached for her hands.

  She avoided his touch, angrily facing him. “My name is Tori. Victoria Elise Hamilton, and I don’t belong here. Now let me by.”

  Ben continued to move toward her only to be halted by
a strong hand on his arm. Glancing back, he narrowed his eyes at Jack, ready to eviscerate the man for attempting to restrain him.

  “Let her go,” Jack said softly. In his friend’s eyes, Ben glimpsed something very much like understanding. “We need to talk.”

  “Very well.”

  Tori walked by him, head held high, refusing to look in his direction.

  “You and I aren’t finished with this, Tori,” Ben shouted at her retreating back. If she heard him, she gave no indication as she simply kept walking away, Alex at her side.

  Jack shook his head, disgust written in his expression. “Nicely handled.”

  Ben cut him off before he could censure him anymore. “Dammit, Jack,” he yelled, frustration rife in his voice. “I don’t recall you wooing your wife perfectly either. In fact, all I remember of your courtship last year is quite a bit of fighting. Either offer me some constructive advice or leave me the hell alone.”

  Jack grinned. “You know, that fighting continues. I’m still trying to learn how to deal with my wife. It’s what happens after the fighting that keeps me coming back for more. That woman sure knows how to make up.”

  “It’s clear you and Hayley are well-suited, in temperament and passion. I thought, I hoped that perhaps Vee, I mean Tori and I were as well. What the hell is going on?” Ben was genuinely upset, by the situation, by her angry departure, by everything.

  Jack gestured for Ben to reenter the cabin. “I always wondered when you would ask me.”

  “Ask you what?” Ben claimed one of the two rough, hard-back chairs around the small circular table.

  “Why Hayley was so different. Why she didn’t behave like other ladies of this time,” Jack replied matter-of-factly. “Alex used to worry about the same thing when he and Erin were courting. I know you and I discussed Erin’s odd behavior and manner of speaking, but somehow, neither one of us felt comfortable addressing the issue with Alex. He was so damn smitten with the chit, we were sure he’d beat the hell out of us for even insinuating she wasn’t normal.”