“Here,” said Yerta, offering me the cup. The water was cool and sweet as it slid down my throat. I felt much better.
“Thank you,” I said. My voice was clearer.
“I tried to talk to Hosta… he will not change his mind. He is Alpha now and Larna is in no shape to challenge him. You must take her away, at least for a while.” Yerta looked guilty, as if he could have done something more to help.
I tried to reassure him. “None of this is your fault, my friend.”
“It is frustrating. Do you know where you will go?”
I could not go back to Baxstresse. That place was so far away, so completely alien to me now. My life was different. I was different. Too different to exist in that world anymore. Larna had no home to go to, either. We would be on our own.
“Larna wanted to join the Rebellion,” I said, thinking out loud. “She wanted to warn them about the Shadowkin and the Kerak in the forest. If they are with Mogra’s puppet-wyr, maybe the witch has joined forces with the Queen. Someone has to be told.”
Yerta was shocked. “You are going to make Larna climb the Rengast, as sick as she is?”
“Well, not until she is better. We will find somewhere to rest…” I tried to sound confident, but secretly, I was not sure where we would find food and shelter. Usually, Larna took care of me. Now, I needed to take care of her.
“Will you come back?” I caught a note of panic and hopefulness in Yerta’s question.
“After that?”
“Maybe. The Farseer pack has been Larna’s home for a long time. Maybe in a few months, we can come back… by then, it will be clear that she is not mad.”
Yerta sighed. “Hosta will still be here. Your problems will not disappear.”
“We will be fine.”
A scratching noise outside the door startled both of us. Yerta’s head jerked sharply as he looked over his shoulder. The door opened and Hosta came in. He did not shout or grow angry. He only stared at the three of us. The hatred in his eyes froze my blood. “Yerta. Come here.” It was clearly an order.
Reluctantly, the younger brother stood, holding his shoulders low. Even though he was in human form, I could picture Yerta with his tail tucked between his legs. I was not angry with him for leaving. He was Pekah, and Hosta was his brother and his Alpha.
Both of them left the room without speaking to me, but when the door to Larna’s hut closed, the shouting started. “What were you thinking? You will never be visiting those two again!”
“But –”
“Dinna think that because you are my brother, I will not punish you. I have been forgiving so far, but I know everything… One more mistake, and…” The voices grew fainter as Hosta and Yerta moved away from the door. I was left alone. Well, not alone, I corrected myself. Larna was still with me.
“Why does Hosta want to keep Yerta away from us?” I asked Larna, stroking her dark hair back from her face. I knew that face so well. Her nose, just a little crooked. Her warm smile. Her eyes were closed now, but I had memorized their color.
Of course, Larna did not answer. She stayed fast asleep, leaving me alone with my worries.
…
Larna opened her eyes later that day and was able to take some food. Aria came in to check on us several times, puttering the house like a doting grandmother. She probably felt just as helpless as I did, I realized.
As a human, I would have questioned why none of my new friends challenged Hosta’s decision. As a Wyr, I understood. It was extremely difficult to go against the decision of an Alpha, especially in a time of crisis. After the Shadowkin attack and Jana Farseer’s death, now was definitely a time of crisis.
My own instincts screamed for a leader, any leader, to give me direction and comfort. If he had not banished my lover, I would have accepted Hosta as my Alpha, even though I did not like him. But my love for Larna was stronger. His attack was unforgivable.
“You have a worry line,” said a hoarse voice beside my ear. I flinched, startled. Larna’s warm breath tickled my cheek. I sighed, leaning back against her chest.
“I wasn’t expecting you to talk,” I explained when she frowned at me.
“I didna mean to be frightening you. I was only wanting to know what you were thinking about,” said Larna. She sounded hurt. I touched my lips to hers twice, softly.
“I startle easily. I was only thinking about Hosta. I don’t understand why he hates you so much.”
Reassured, Larna smiled. “That is because you love me so much. You dinna understand hate.” That smile made my skin warm. Being with Larna made so many new feelings – love and wonder and desire – grow in me. They broke through my anger and grief and fear like sunlight through a cloud. When I was focused on my lover, she was truly my lover now in every sense of the word, none of the bad things could touch me.
“I wish we had more time, time for us.” I was surprised to feel wetness on my cheeks. It took me several moments to understand that I was crying. “It isn’t fair. I only got one night with you… and then everything went wrong.”
Larna stroked my arm with the tips of her fingers. “Shh. Dinna cry, my little bird. You are my mate now. We will have more nights and days. Now is a bad time, but it will not last forever.”
The tears were slow and hot. Even though I was only crying softly, I could not stop.
“Why do you have to be so reasonable?” I snapped. I was angry, but not at Larna.
My mate chose her answer carefully. “I am too tired to be upset,” Larna admitted. I was touched. I knew that it was difficult for my mate to admit any kind of weakness, even to me. Larna’s healing body had sucked up all of her energy.
“You take such good care of me,” I whispered. “For a few days, just let me take care of you. Then you can go back to your job, all right?”
Larna smiled, closing her eyes. My tears were gone now, but my face was still wet. “All right. I will be holding you to that.”
…
We left the next morning, before first light. Larna and I did not say goodbye to anyone in camp. We knew that it would only be awkward and painful. Aria, Yerta, and the rest of our friends did not want to see us go, but they did not want to defy their Alpha. Larna and I held no grudge against them. We did not want them to feel guilty.
“So, where are we going?” Larna asked, keeping her voice cheerful. I was leading us toward the river so that we could fill our waterskins and decide which direction to go. She had healed well over the last twenty-four hours, and was almost at full strength. I was relieved that she was well enough to travel.
“You tell me. I don’t know the way to the rebellion,” I said, shifting the weight of my traveling pack on my shoulder. There was one for each of us, packed with food, waterskins, some clothes, and my journal with Ellie. I wore Sarah’s red cloak around my shoulders, glad for its protection against the cold. Even deep in the forest, with the trees to protect us from the worst of the wind’s bite, the temperature was lowering as winter approached.
Larna did not look surprised. I tried to read her expression, but could only describe it as cautious. “Are you sure you want to be going there?” she asked, sounding doubtful. “It is a dangerous place unless you are a fighter.”
“I am a fighter,” I said, “or did you not see me attack Shadowkin, Keraks, and the demon that disguised itself as Kalwyn?”
Larna smiled, seeming proud of me. “You are not a fighter, little bird, you are a brave defender. You will protect your home, your family, and innocents, but you do not like fighting. I am a warrior. I look for fights to test myself.”
“I am not a fighter, but I can fight,” I protested, not willing to back down. “I know you want to go to the rebellion. We will find the leader and tell him about the Queen’s monsters in the forest.”
My dark lover thought for a moment. “You will not leave me,” she said. It was not a question. “If I was telling you to go and stay with your friends in Seria, you would not listen.”
I could n
ot help it. I reached up and stroked her cheek, brushing it with my knuckles.
“Yes, I would stay with you.”
Larna’s eyebrows lifted higher on her forehead. “What if I snuck away?”
“I would track you.”
She laughed, showing even teeth. Small lines formed around her eyes, which were much clearer now. I was so happy that my lover was better, even though we were banished from our pack. “To your left more,” said Larna, gently correcting me. “If you are squinting through the treetops, you can see the Rengast’s peaks.” She pointed up.
Doubtfully, I followed her lifted hand. “It is so high,” I said, a little intimidated. “Are the rebels all the way at the top?”
“Jett Bahari’s camp is near the top, but not in the snow. He is not wanting the Queen to find him.” We were silent for a while. I allowed Larna to lead the way, since she knew the Forest better than I did. I realized that we were going in the direction of Kalwyn’s house, and hoped that we would not pass too close.
“No one talks very much about the Queen. They say her name – sometimes – but they never tell me who she is.”
“That is because they dinna know what is true and what is legend. Few have seen the Queen. We only know that she controls horrible beasts and kills many people. She lives in the castle of Kalmarin, along the white cliffs in the south. The capital is now a place of evil.”
Larna looked regretful, almost ashamed. To my surprise, I shared her feelings. Even though I had only returned to Amendyr recently, Kalmarin was a noble city. I grew up with stories of its white cliffs and ancient heroes. I hated the thought that an evil ruler sat in the royal palace and used the great lion shield and banner. It was an insult to our country, our history. “It hurts your stomach, too,” said Larna, reading me instantly. “It is wrong. So many innocents… that is why we fight.”
“Even the defenders like me need to fight now,” I said.
Larna looked at me with deep, worried brown eyes. The depth of them took my breath away for a moment, but we did not stop walking. “Learn to fight with magic. I think it will be suiting you better than tearing things with your claws.”
“I am sure you will take care of anything that comes too close to me,” I said, squeezing Larna’s hand. She was startled at the touch, but quickly relaxed in to it, lacing her fingers with mine. The warmth made both of us smile a little.
…
Chapter Ten:
I squinted my eyes, just making out the dark shapes of the village huts a few hundred yards away in the last of the daylight. “Something is wrong with the silhouette,” said Larna’s voice beside me. She glanced ahead, worried. “It doesna look right. It’s not the same as it was the last time I came this way.”
“How can you tell from so far away?” I asked.
Larna frowned and kept staring ahead at the village. “I have been here before. There are not many villages this close to the forest. I have stayed here.” Larna started walking again, faster than before. I hurried behind her, trying to keep up with the new pace.
The closer that we got to the village, the more concerned Larna’s face became. I started to say something when I noticed a strong smell hanging in the air. I recognized it at once.
“It smells like… like…” The words stuck in my throat.
“Burning flesh,” Larna finished for me. “We dinna want to go there.” Larna stopped, turned to her left and started walking away from the village. I stood still for a few seconds, and then followed.
“Larna, what happened?” I asked in a frightened whisper.
“The Queen burned it,” she answered coldly. “What did you think happened?”
I grabbed Larna’s shoulder and did not let go until she looked me straight in the eye.
“Don’t snap at me,” I said. “Put your anger in its place.”
Larna’s expression softened. She pulled me into a tight hug. I was surprised and took a few seconds to gather myself. “What was that for?” I asked awkwardly once Larna let go.
“I am sorry,” Larna said. “I keep forgetting that you have been in Seria. You have not heard much about the things happening in Amendyr.”
“I forgive you.”
“We will go deeper into the forest,” Larna decided, changing the subject. “Away from the paths. Anyone that survived will be long gone by now. The village was probably burned three days ago. I dinna want my last memory of this place to be of burned corpses and ashes.”
“If it was burned three days ago, why is the smell still here?” I asked.
Larna sighed and looked back sadly at the village. It was smaller now. The hunched black shapes of its remains looked sad and broken, even from a distance. “The dead bodies are probably still burning,” she said. “The smell willna go away for a long time.”
We did not talk for several minutes. Both of us were wrapped up in our worries. The sun had set, and the forest was dark, but there was just enough light to travel by. Finally, Larna broke the silence. “Here, I am thinking I see a house.”
I looked where Larna was pointing. “I think it is,” I said hopefully.
“Should we go and see?”
I shrugged. “Why not? Maybe we can stay for the night.” We headed right, in the direction of the house. It was small, I noticed when I took a closer look. It only had one floor, but it looked tidy from the outside. The walls were made out of dark, sturdy wood.
While I was studying the house, Larna walked up to the front door. She reached up into the left corner, feeling for something. After a moment, she nodded me forward.
“We are in luck,” she said. “It has the sign.”
“The sign?”
“This house is a friend to the rebellion. There is a carving in the corner of the door.”
“Why can’t the Queen tell which houses are part of the rebellion if there is a sign right on their door?”
“It’s a tricky bit of magic,” Larna said. “Unless you are looking for it, you canna find it.”
I was interested. “Who came up with that idea?”
“Oh.” Larna grinned. “His name is Doran. He is old and paranoid and thinks everyone is trying to steal his signs. He was reluctant to give it to the rest of us, but Jett Bahari, the leader of the rebellion, convinced him that we needed it.”
I started to ask another question, but I remembered where we were. “We should probably knock,” I said, slightly embarrassed. If anyone was watching us from inside, our behavior would seem strange.
Larna looked confused for a moment, then she realized what I meant. “Oh! Of course. I will knock.” Larna lifted her hand and tapped on the door. A few seconds later, it opened part way. A middle aged woman peered out at us from behind the door.
“Who are you?” she asked, but her voice did not sound rude or demanding.
“Travelers,” Larna said. “I am Larna and this is Cate. We are heading for the Rengast and we were wondering if we could stay for the night.”
The woman relaxed and opened the door the rest of the way, standing to the side. Larna and I passed her. She was wearing a loose, simple dress. It looked home-made. “Of course, come in. Where are you from?”
“Katar,” Larna said. I was surprised to hear the name of Larna’s old village, but it made sense. We could not tell her that we had been living in the forest with a pack of Wyr. Most humans were afraid of them.
“My son Paetir is there doing some business for his father,” the woman told us cheerfully. “Actually, I am expecting him back tonight.” Larna’s expression held.
“He will be in for a surprise on his way back, then,” Larna said. “We were passing a little village on our way, and it was burned to the ground.”
“I saw the flames,” the woman said. She frowned and lowered her eyes to the floor. Hurrying past us, she closed the door. “I wanted to go and see if I could be of any use, but I dinna think there was anything I could do. I hope all of those poor souls find rest.”
“There was nothing to b
e done,” Larna said comfortingly. “Maybe some escaped. Thank you for letting us stay, by the way.”
I remembered my manners. “Yes, thanks,” I echoed. “I was hoping we would find somewhere to spend the night.”
The woman looked at me strangely, as if trying to remember something. “You are coming from a good distance away, yes?” she asked.
I shook my head. “Er, not exactly. I come from… well…”
“She spent a few years in Seria,” Larna interrupted.
“You dinna have a Serian accent, but no Amendyri one either. You speak like a classical book.” It was an interesting way to describe my speech, but accurate. I shrugged.
“I read in Amendyri to keep the language alive when I left.”
“Well, both of you must have had a long journey,” the woman said sympathetically. “My name is Kila.”
My ears picked up some scuffling around behind me. I turned to see what it was. Hiding near the edge of the room was a little blonde-haired boy. His shirt that was far too big for him. He ran up to Kila and latched on to her leg. She smiled down at him and patted his head. “Say hello, Kai,” she said, trying to detach him. The little boy would not budge. He shook his head and buried his face in her stomach.
“Arim dei,” I said softly, crouching down to the floor so that she was eye-level with the child. “My name is Cathelin.” Slowly, the boy pulled away from his mother’s leg. He stared up at me with wide blue eyes. He waved his pudgy fingers shyly and I waved back. When I stood back up, Kila was absolutely beaming.
“Come, let me get you something to eat,” she offered kindly. Larna and I accepted right away. Both of us were starving.
Kila spent most of dinner telling us about the absent members of her family. Her husband and her oldest son went to join the rebellion. She had not been able to go because of Kai. Paetir, who was not quite old enough to fight, had stayed behind. She asked us questions about ourselves. Larna deflected them with vague answers. Kila was kind enough not to pry.
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