Elusive

by Linda Rae Blair

  “Well, my dear, you seem to have thought everything through quite thoroughly. If that’s what you’ve decided, that’s what we shall do. Have you plans to see Blair before we go?” She thought a little gentle shove wouldn’t do any harm.

  “No. There’s no need. The lawyers and the courts are handling everything. We’re not contesting. The…relatives…are out of the picture. She should be just fine. She’ll move in here soon, and her new life will begin.” Something about that had his gut churning uncomfortably, but he refused to think about it in any depth right now—about what his family had tried to do to her. The guilt of his family’s involvement weighed heavily on him.

  “I see. Well,” she said, rising from the table, “I suppose I had best go upstairs and see to getting some of my things packed.” With that, she walked over to where he sat, bent over him, and gently kissed the top of his head. He had always been a stubborn boy, even as a small child. Oh well, she sighed, as she walked to the staircase, there’s still hope. Perhaps Blair isn’t as blindly stubborn as her son. Dear God, it does seem to run in the family, she thought. Then she silently smiled to herself, as she continued slowly up the stairs to her quarters.

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  Chapter 30: Woman Scorned

  Donnach, Scotland – August 1912

  She had not seen him for weeks. The lawyers had kept her in meetings for hours at a time, and she was weary down to her bones. Blair would not understand why Alexandre had been so distant, not only in attitude, but literally. He had spent three weeks in France now without so much as a word before he left, and no letter since. Had the estate meant so much to him that it had driven a wedge between them?

  Who was she kidding? He had had her in his bed, had enjoyed her while he could, and now he was done with her. She felt that clutch in her stomach at the thought that he might have used her. No, she wasn’t going to let herself go there. It was too humiliating to bear. She had felt the closeness between them. There had been the intimacy of their shared thoughts, stories about her past and his, his obvious desire to know her so much better. Perhaps he did not like what he had found? Then why had he introduced her to his mother?

  She knew nothing about his business in France. For some reason, Blair had been embarrassed to just come out and ask him. She prayed that the loss of the estate, and the wealth that came with it, was not going to cause him, or his dear mère, any hardship. Surely the shipping business Mairi had spoken of would support them well. What if the business hadn’t done well? There had been scandals in shipping throughout the year. What if Black Swan was suffering losses?

  More reflection on his financial state had her questioning that he would miss the money. After all, he had stayed in that same expensive hotel in Edinburgh. But back then he had thought he was going to inherit the estate, so perhaps he had simply put his finances aside and splurged.

  Thinking about that in more depth, she didn’t quite believe that was the case either. He obviously had had a very fine education. He dressed impeccably and his manners, when he was not snarling at her, were those of a gentleman. He had not asked for any money in the settlement of the estate. Why, oh why, did he not just talk to her about himself? She was wearing herself out just going back and forth trying to figure him out.

  Then the unthinkable came to her and had her heart crashing in her chest. Perhaps she would never see him again…a knock at the door stopped her train of thought. She opened the door, and ….

  “Cousin,” he said, taking in every inch of her with those eyes.

  “Alex, you are back,” she said, as she tried to smile up at him. The pain of the truth struck her so suddenly that she found her knees were weak. She was in love with him. Oh, God, what would she do? He so obviously didn’t want her.

  Alexandre saw the shock on her face when she opened the door. He was unsure whether she was glad or sorry to see him there. She was so pale, and the color under her eyes told him she had not been sleeping well. Well, they did have that in common. While one hand held onto the door so tightly that her knuckles went white, the other was fitfully playing with the ruffle at the front of her blouse. “Blair? May I come in?”

  “Oh, yes. I am sorry. Do please come in,” she backed up and gave him room to enter. “Would you like something to drink? How was your trip?”

  He thought of the desolate weeks since he had seen her. “Some wine would be nice.” The hell he had put himself through—and for what? One look at her and he was right back where he’d been before he left. He was done in, and he knew it. Damn, how had she done this to him? “Business is doing well.”

  Blair was aware that his mouth had tightened, and his brows were pinching together in the way they did when he was mulling over something that displeased him. She was terribly afraid that he was angry with her about something, but she could not imagine what it could be. Did he resent her now that she was inheriting? Why was she being such a coward?

  “Alex, what is wrong? You are obviously upset about something. Why not just say what is on your mind?”

  “May I sit?”

  “Of course!” Now her temper was in full swing. “Alex, do not be so foolish. I have been in your bed! You think you must still be so formal with me?” She was now pacing back and forth in front of him, unsure in her own mind of the real source of her anger.

  “Perhaps I should not have come!” he snapped at her.

  “Perhaps not!” she retorted, still pacing.

  “Damn it, woman! Can’t we spend five minutes together without scratching at each other like alley cats?” He grabbed her, and the kiss was less than polite. As soon as he tasted her, he was lost. He’d been hungry for her since he had last left her. Finally getting a grip on himself, he gently pulled back from her. “Well, that was better than fighting,” he said quietly, as he watched her beautiful face. Her eyes were blank, and that pouty mouth was still slightly open.

  What was he saying? She could not focus. “I am sorry, did you say something?”

  “I was saying that I would like to take you to dinner tomorrow night.” He didn’t even know when the idea had struck him. He really should stay away from her, but he just didn’t seem to be able to do it.

  “Dinner? I think that would be lovely.” She really should stay away from him. It would only hurt more when she lost him, but perhaps this one last time. “Oui.”

  ***

  Later in his rooms, he would curse himself for his weakness. The best thing he could do for them both would be to go back to France and stay put.

  She was an innocent in so many ways, and he knew that was the last way anyone had felt about him for a very long time. A man of thirty-five years, who had led a formidable business for more than ten of those years, and with his reputation—deserved or not—had no business seducing her, hurting her. He had seen it on her face when she opened the door, the pain and confusion. He was driving them both crazy.

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  Chapter 31: Cupid Strikes

  Donnach, Scotland – August 1912

  Pacing in his rooms at the inn, Alexandre was relieved that all the legalities were finally over. He had no need for the estate as far as money was concerned. God knew he was wealthy in his own right, as was his mother. He was just glad that Blair, at last, was safe from harm and would receive everything that should have been hers from birth. She loved the castle as much as he did, he knew. Now it would be hers along with enough money for its upkeep, which he knew from personal experience would cost a fortune, and a lifestyle that would afford her every luxury. She would have the opportunity to travel and experience the world. There was so much life in store for her.

  As for himself, he was only missing the one thing he needed more than air. He needed Blair, and he could deny it no longer. He had been arguing both sides for weeks, getting nowhere. He had to take his chances. He wasn’t going to let her slip out of his hands so easily.

  She hadn’t even asked him about his plans, and that had hurt him m
ore than he would have believed. Well, if she didn’t love him yet, he would just have to work harder to earn her.

  With grim determination on his face, he left his rooms to go get what he needed—her.

  ***

  She had, at last, heard from Madame and Esmée both. She had cried for days thinking of poor old Mssr. LeGard. Esmée was coming for a visit in the fall. Madame was, Blair felt certain, sending her to check on Blair.

  With her, Esmée was bringing the vase Blair had so lovingly packed up from Roddy’s apartment. She had been so certain that she had lost everything that remained of his belongings. Then Esmée wrote that, once the police released access to the apartment, she and Madame had gone through her belongings to gather together what few items remained intact.

  Esmée had found the beloved vase which had landed on a rug and rolled under her bed, where it had been saved from the killer’s search and destruction. There were also her books, the few that were not damaged. They had also dug up a few of her spring bulbs so that she could start a new garden with some of her favorites.

  The lawyers and courts had done their jobs, the banks had done theirs. It was all hers and all now in her name. Somehow she felt a sadness that it was all over. She would move into Castle Donnach by the end of the week.

  With all the issues resolved, Blair feared that Alexandre had no reason to come again to Scotland—no, to her. He would always love and need Scotland. As the tightness in her throat spread slowly to her stomach, she refused to cry. No, she would put a smile on her face, and she would wait for him to destroy her heart without putting him through a scene. It was the least she could do for the man she knew she would never get over—nothing more than Caena had done for her Sòlas.

  As she pinned the little silver brooch shaped like a Celtic knot onto the lapel of her jacket, she heard the knock at her door. She stiffened her spine and, with complete determination to enjoy and remember every moment of the evening, she walked to the door. When she opened it she found him standing there, and the sight of him took her breath away.

  He looked so male, so strong standing there in his kilt and the stockings that rose almost to his knees. The plaid of the kilt was of their tartan. She knew instantly that she would think of him every time she saw the pattern or its colors for the rest of her life.

  “Well, my beautiful lassie,” he said, smiling at her and bowing slightly before her. “Are you ready for dinner?”

  “Aye,” she responded. “I am, kind sir.” She smiled, curtseying deeply as they mimicked the old ways. Laughing, they left her rooms—together for what she feared might be the last time.

  ***

  Dinner had been lovely. Candles burned, and the flickering light caused crystal to twinkle and pewter to glow like moonlight. The food was exquisite. The chef had done wonderful things to the beef grown on the estate. The sauces made in French style had their mouths watering for more. Neither of them would ever forget the meal set before them.

  Blair felt herself softening to the sweet glances he sent her while they ate. She didn’t want to soften toward him. She didn’t want to hurt even more desperately when he went his own way.

  He had been unusually quiet during the meal. As she sipped on her wine, she noticed that he was watching her in that unnerving way of his. The eyes locked onto hers, the mouth set with stubborn determination.

  “Alex, tell me how it is that a small village like Donnach has such fine restaurants? The chef here must have had formal training. The food is wonderful, but how does a small village warrant this?”

  “It’s our proximity to Edinburgh. As you know, we are but a short train ride away. We get a fair amount of tourist trade here, have for many years. My mother saw to it that some of our local lads and lassies were sent to Paris for their culinary education, as well as other trades. The agreement with them was that, once their training was completed, they would open establishments here in Donnach to help the local economy,” he explained. “Our fine bookstore is another example, and there are several others.”

  “It seems I have a great deal to learn,” she admitted.

  “Scotland got a great deal of its wealth from its shipping—importing tobacco from America and sugar from the islands for sale to the English. Donnach has been a beneficiary by way of its proximity to Edinburgh’s ocean access. Added to our Black Face sheep and shaggy Highland cattle, Donnach is much better off than many villages. My parents did what they could to build the local economy without losing the ‘village’ atmosphere. I think they were very successful at it over the years.”

  “Yes, I believe they were.” Once again, their conversation lagged. Her nerves were as taut has she had ever experienced.

  “Blair,” he began, with every muscle in his body tensed, as he tried desperately to maintain control, “are you not going to ask me of my plans? Have you no interest in where we go from here?”

  He knew he had said the wrong thing the instant he saw the fire in her eyes ignite. Silently, he cursed himself for being so awkward about this. He simply couldn’t think straight with her sitting there, so beautiful, so sweet, so near. He seemed to make one misstep after another where she was concerned.

  “Your plans?” she asked in utter frustration. Did the man think he was the only one that could make plans? “Your plans?” she asked again as her temper finally took over. She had held on as long as she could. Throwing down her table linen and gritting her teeth, she charged forward with her tantrum. If she was going to lose him, she was going to at least have her say. All her determination to let him go without a scene blew right out the window!

  “Are your plans the only ones that are important, Alex? Are you the only one whose future is about to change? You will head back to France; take up where you left off before this journey of ours began. I will be left here alone with a broken heart! Don’t you know how much I love you? Are you so self-centered that you have no concern for me and the loss you leave behind you?”

  As the stir spread around the dining room, he was certain the whole village would know by morning that the wee lassie with the pale hair had ripped into the Laird once again. My, she was a beautiful sight when she was in full temper.

  He was so humbled by her declaration of love, and yes, as any man would be, he was so unnerved by the tears streaming down her face, that he was unable to speak for a moment. Then he rose from the table, went to her, and knelt beside her chair.

  “Blair, do you really not know how very much I love you? If all my discomfort and fumbling the last few months have not shown you, I must admit to being a miserable failure. Je t’aime. Je t’aime, petit ami. Marry me, Blair, and I swear I will spend the rest of my life showing you how much I adore you. Just tell me what you need, and I will give it to you. I have no need to do more than travel to France occasionally for business, but here is my heart, here in Scotland with you.”

  She couldn’t believe her ears. “Oh, Alex, all I need is you. You are all I have ever wanted or needed. Yes, I will marry you.”

  “We will have the biggest wedding the village has ever seen,” he smiled up at her.

  “Alex,” she whispered, now recognizing that every face in the restaurant was watching them, “can we afford that big a wedding?”

  He laughed that deep, hardy laugh she loved. She still hadn’t come to grips with her own wealth—let alone his! Rising to bend over her and whisper in her ear, “My darling Blair, we can afford to invite the whole damned country if that’s what you want.”

  “Oh!” She gasped. “I don’t think it has to be quite that big, do you?”

  “It will be exactly what you want, Chéri!” he promised, as he pulled her into a kiss that left her knees weak and trembling.

  Then he pulled her to the door. “Alex, where are we going?”

  “To get you a ring, my love. I’ll not let you back out on me now!”

  “But, Alex, the shops are all closed. It’s late,” she laughed.

  “I have just the thing in mind, my love. It�
��s in Paris,” he said, still dragging her along with him,

  “Paris? Oh, Alex! We can’t go to Paris tonight…can we?” she asked.

  “Darling, you must get used to the idea that we can do whatever your heart desires. Now, get into the car…we’re off to Edinburgh to catch the next ship to Paris where I will buy you the biggest, best diamond any woman has ever had.”

  She faced him, put her hand on his cheek, “Alex, you must get used to the idea that you are all I need!” Then looking down at her empty ring finger, she added, giggling, “Not that I mind the idea of a beautiful ring.”

  “God, I love you, Blair,” he said, as he pulled her to him for another of those kisses that melted her bones and left her weak. “Now, get into the car, my love. I’m taking you to Paris.”

  Inside the restaurant, the crowd erupted in cat calls and applause. They would all go home tonight to share the tale of the Laird and the Lady—their Laird—their Lady. There was to be a wedding!

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  Chapter 32: The Wedding

  Donnach Castle – December 21, 1913

  Preparation for the ceremony had included all the normal things that European brides and grooms considered traditional; the many-tiered wedding cake, twelve huge rings in all, with the bride and groom topping it; the garter sitting snuggly waiting for Alex to remove it; something old, new, borrowed, blue.

  It also had all the Scottish twists, some modern, some from Caena’s time added in. Blair and Alex had decided that their wedding was going to be as much a celebration of the love shared by Caena and Sòlas as it was of their own. In that vein, they had decided to go with all the ancient bridal traditions for their wedding costumes. It would take time but would be worth it to both of them. Had it not been for Caena and Sòlas, Blair would never have existed.

  The wedding date had been set for December 21st, Alban Arthuan, the Celtic winter solstice festival, now blended into the Yule celebration held at Christmastime. The ceremony would be held in the Great Hall of the castle, the reception would spread from the Great Hall throughout the lower level of the castle with the entire village invited to join them. These were their people, and Blair and Alexandre wanted to share the celebration of their marriage with all of them.