by Martha Long
I filled the kettle for the washing up and started to clear the table, then stacked the dishes on the side of the draining board for washing.
I’m finished at last. That’s everything washed and put away and the kitchen’s looking nice and clean. I just have to sweep the floor and I have me kitchen out of the way. I heard water running, then saw it pooling around me feet. Jaysus! Help! Mammy! What’s happening? Then a hose shot around from the back of the washing machine with water pumping out. Aaaaahhhhh, help! I grabbed hold of it, wondering what to do. It won’t stretch! I need to put that in the sink. I pulled like mad and the rest of it appeared and I dumped it in the sink. Right, the washing is now rinsing. I better dry up the bleedin floor. It’s completely flooded. That’s more work for meself.
At last, the floor is dry. I squeezed out the mop under the tap and admired me floor. I didn’t know it was that colour, a sort of burnt orange. It looks grand. That must be the first time in years that floor has seen a drop of water!
The washing machine had stopped growling, and thumping, and trying to throw itself around the kitchen, and it was quiet now. I didn’t know it was supposed to do that kind of thing. I thought it must be broken when I grabbed it earlier, trying to stop it lepping into the air. Jaysus! Everything in this house is crazy! Even the washing machine is in on the act.
Right, now to get the clothes out on the line. I lifted up the lid and stuff started bursting out. I got the top stuff out but now the rest won’t move. I heaved and pulled because everything was wedged tight, tangled and stuck underneath. Aaaahhh! Jaysus Christ almighty! This is pulling the heart outa me. I can’t get the stuff out!
I lost the head and started yanking, holding onta the leg of a pair of trousers and had a tug of war. Digging me feet in and tearing meself across the kitchen. I felt a heave then a pop and the stuff . . . no, it’s the drum started to come up with the clothes. I stopped to look. I don’t think it’s supposed to do that! I pulled the clothes and the drum rocked loose. Oh, Mammy! I think it’s broken. Wha’ll I do? I told that dyed-haired grey-haired aul cow I can’t do washing! ‘I don’t know how to use a washing machine,’ I whispered, staring at the stuff looking back at me.
I stood thinking for a minute, holding onta the leg of the trousers. Right, get the stuff out and close the lid and say nothing. What she won’t know won’t hurt her. I dug me hands in, trying to get a grip on the middle stuff, getting it a little bit loose. Then I pulled hard on the trousers, seeing the rest of it appear, taking a load of other stuff with it. Lovely! I’m getting somewhere. I pulled the trousers, black ones, then heard a ripping sound. Oh, Gawd! What have I done now? I looked at the trousers, seeing the huge tear right down the middle. Ah, mother a God, the arse is gone out of the trousers! How can anyone be as stupid as me?
I felt like crying. ‘She will go stark-staring raving mad! The only good thing is she won’t ask me to do any more washing. That’s a good thing. I’ll just let her go mad, and keep saying sorry,’ I heard meself whispering, getting outa breath. What else can she do, Martha? Yeah, it will work out grand when she gets over the terrible news I’m even more stupid then she thinks. Yeah, that’s what will happen.
I went back to me pulling, and finally got a huge bundle coming up, but I had to stand each side of the drum to stop it coming up with the stuff every time I tried to pull. Maybe I could get a job in a circus doing a balancing act! Oh, Mammy! What’s the worst thing she can do to me? I felt me nerves rattling. I lifted the clothes out in a heap, seeing more and more coming. Oh, thank God! At last, I’m getting somewhere. But they don’t look right. I stared at the clothes and dumped them all on the sink and started to untangle the lot. Oh, no! This definitely doesn’t look right. They all look the same colour! A reddish pink. Oh, Mammy! That’s the aul fella’s shirt. I’m sure that was white going in.
I lifted them up one by one, putting them in the yellow basket. Everything is looking the same colour. All the white stuff is now pink, with a mixture of red and blue. The coloured sheets have even gone grey. Well, with bits of different colours. Fuck! That must be from the jeans. oh, no! The woollen jumpers have shrunk. I held up one that looked like Grainne’s. It wouldn’t fit a sixpenny doll. All the woollen stuff is shrunk, even Sinead’s good red polo-neck. It’s gone smaller then the size of a hankie. Me heart leaped with the fright. What am I going to do? Jaysus! I’m definitely dead.
I put all the stuff in the basket and carried it out to the line, half dragging it. This weight would pull the heart out of a horse. Dear God, what will she say? How am I going to get out of this? I started to hang the clothes on the line, trying to keep everything away from the full view of the kitchen window. I know what I’ll do! I’ll try to get the lot dry as soon as possible, and stuff it down underneath the stuff still waiting to be ironed. Yeah, OK. That’s all I can do.
I rushed in with the empty basket and looked over at the clock sitting on the windowsill. Bloody hell, it’s after two o’clock! Where did the time go to? I haven’t done the rest of the house yet! I still have the hoovering and beds to do and the fires to clean and get ready for lighting. Right, move fast. The vegetables have to be done as well. I dumped the rest of the dirty washing in the basket and left it sitting back where it belonged in the corner of the so-called dining room. There’s not even enough room on the line for the stuff I already put out. I had to squeeze in the stuff, putting some things on top of each other. Right, now for upstairs.
I cleaned out the fire in the aul fella and aul one’s room, then rushed down and out to the coal shed. Maybe I should clean all the fires out first then set them for lighting all at the same time. That would make more sense. Right, I might as well dump these cinders. Where does she put them? Not in the shed. That’s full of coal. I looked around the garden, seeing a dump at the end of the wall behind an old tree that was on its last legs. It never even really got growing before it started to die. Hmm, this place is going to put years on me. oh, I can’t wait to get the hell out. I just need to wait until tomorrow when I get me wages. I felt meself beginning to cheer up at that thought.
I rushed back up with the bucket, leaving it on the landing, and started on the bed. I stripped off all the blankets and the eiderdown and made up the bed, with the mattress sagging in the middle. They must have bought that when they were first married. That was probably about fifty years ago! You would think they would go out and buy a new one. Miserable aul sods! There’s two of them working. I wonder what they do with their money? Right, that’s that done.
I dragged the bucket and started in the Sinead one’s room. Oh, holy Jaysus! What a filthy pig. Me eyes travelled around the room, taking in the kip of a dump. She has dirty clothes and knickers, shoes, bags and magazines, cups with mouldy tea festering away, a dinner plate with the remains of a fried egg cementing itself to it, and tons of rubbish all thrown in every direction. Every bit of the floor is covered in filth. Jaysus! She’s definitely mental. They’re all fucking mental. Right, get on with it. I better start on the fire.
Jesus! Am I glad that room is finished? I dragged the hoover, leaving it on the landing, and went into Padraig’s room. This is too much. The place is stinking to high heavens! oh, just keep moving.
OK, that’s all done! Now, let me see. Where am I now? The fires are set, the beds are made, the rooms are cleaned and the carpets are hoovered. It must have taken me the whole day. I just have to do this landing and the stairs then I can start on the sitting room. That only leaves me with the vegetables to do.
Me back aches from all that stooping and bending up and down. This is as bad, if not worse, than the work I was doing in the convent. At least in the convent you could see what you were cleaning and it didn’t smell like this place. Gawd! I would just love to sit down now and have a rest with a lovely cup of tea. Yeah, I really need a cup of tea and something to eat. I’m starving with the hunger. Jaysus! I’m working all day and I got no breakfast! Oh, just leave it. Get on with the job and get finished. Thinking like that won’t do any go
od or get the job done. It must be late. God knows what time it is. I’m afraid to look at the clock.
OK, that’s the last of the stairs. Now for the sitting room. ‘Oh, that’s great! I’m finished at last,’ I puffed, letting out me breath with the exhaustion and making me way out of the sitting room, dragging the hoover with me. Right, that’s everything done. The house is now spic and span. All I have to do now is the vegetables.
I was just making me way into the kitchen when the hall door opened. ‘It’s home again! Mammy, can I phone Betty Norton, the girl from my class at school? I promised I would. I want to borrow that Enid Blyton book she said I could borrow.’
‘No, you are not allowed to make any phone calls, and well you know it, so stop bothering me about such nonsense!’
‘But, Mammy!’
‘No, go upstairs now and start doing your homework!’ roared the aul one, losing the rag. She whipped her head around, seeing me head into the kitchen. ‘Have you got them potatoes on yet, with the head of cabbage I told you to prepare?’
‘I’m just about to start peeling them now,’ I said, looking down the hall at her, seeing the red face and the eyes blazing out of her head. Jaysus! She really is in bad form.
‘You are completely useless!’ she roared, flying down the hall and whipping the scarf from around her neck and dumping it on the table. ‘What’s this? You have nothing ready?’ I stood looking at her, trying to take in what she was talking about.
‘Excuse me, missus!’
‘Don’t you give me any of your aul excuses!’ she roared. ‘You are bone idle! The lot of you from these convents. The nuns should be ashamed of themselves, letting people like you free when you can’t even tie your own shoelaces.’
‘What? I have been cleaning this house since early morning!’ I started to roar, losing me rag. ‘Fuck this!’ I muttered to meself. ‘Listen, missus! No one could have worked harder then me, you know?’
‘I want no more cheek from you!’ she barked, going purple in the face and tearing open the press and slamming down the pots. ‘Now, get started on them vegetables straight away or you’ll be looking for another job quicker than you know!’
‘Listen . . .’ I started to say, trying to keep me head and not let the fear and temper get the better of me. I felt trapped in this place. There was something about that aul one that reminded me of Jackser. But I didn’t have to put up with it.
‘Mammy, can I call up to her house then? I won’t be long!’
‘No! How many times do I have to tell you? Get up them stairs this minute and start on your homework.’
I lifted the head of cabbage out of the rack, feeling meself shaking inside with the nerves. I feel pulled between telling her to stick her job up her arse and wanting to hang on just one more day to collect me wages. I have barely enough money to buy meself a cup of coffee, never mind buying something to eat! Yeah, there is definitely a bit of the feeling of Jackser in this house. I can sense it around that woman.
‘I’m home, Mammy! Is dinner on?’ Sinead roared, rushing into the kitchen and throwing down her coat in the corner of the hall then letting her books and bag land on top of it. ‘I will be going out around nine tonight. Clem is picking me up in his mother’s Mini,’ she said, talking to the ma and watching me wrestling with the head of cabbage.
Do I cut it or wash it first? I looked at the head, wondering if I should take off the leaves one by one. ‘Did you light the fire in my room?’ Sinead said, suddenly shouting at me. I whipped me head away from the head of cabbage and looked over at her standing with her hands on her hips.
‘Oh, sorry! I knew there was something I should do. But your mammy and me have to do the dinner,’ I said, showing her the head of cabbage.
‘Mammy, is there no fire lit in my room? The bloody house is freezing. It’s nearly as cold in here as it is outside! How can I be expected to study in my room without heat?’ she screamed, looking at her mother and roaring at me. Then she was gone, flying out the door and up the stairs.
I went back to me head of cabbage. She was no sooner up the stairs than I heard a roar coming from up on the landing. ‘Where’s my red polo-neck sweater I told you to wash? Did you hand-wash it, like I asked you to?’
Me heart leaped with the fright. Then a key turned in the front door and a voice said, ‘Hello, everybody, I’M HoME!’ I looked, seeing it was the Padraig fella, shouting and laughing as he put his head in the door. Then he got knocked sideways by Sinead flying back into the room and heading straight over to the wash basket. I turned me head slightly, holding me breath and watched her leaning her head in and pulling all the dirty clothes from the basket, sending them flying in all directions.
Oh, dear God! Here it comes. I was afraid to breathe. Then the ma whipped her head up, looking out to the clothes line at the mention of washing. ‘What happened to the clothes?’ asked the mammy, looking out the window, not able to believe her eyesight. I felt meself getting weak. I have been on the go all day and have nothing in me stomach and now I feel like I’m living with fucking Jackser all over again. ‘What have you done to the washing?’ screamed the aul one, rushing to the back door and yanking it open.
‘What? What’s going on?’ said Sinead, lifting her head to get a look out, then taking off to the back door to see what’s happened to the washing.
‘The clothes are destroyed,’ the ma said quietly, muttering to herself. ‘That imbecile of a girl has destroyed everything. Everything!’ moaned the aul one. I could hear her voice and guessed she must be walking up and down the line, taking in all the dyed clothes. ‘The shirts. Your father’s shirts. He needs them for work.’
‘MY GOOD POLO-NECK!’ screamed Sinead.
Right, that’s it. I’ve taken enough, I thought, feeling the rage make its way around me chest and down into me belly. I didn’t feel like screaming. I just knew when enough was enough. I’m not staying here one more minute around these people. I may be desperate, but I’m not that desperate. I left down the head of cabbage and walked off up the stairs and into the dog box they had a cheek to call a bedroom. I picked up me suitcase and put it down on the bed, taking me nightdress from under the pillow and me hot-water bottle from under the blankets. I never even got the time today to make me own bed.
I picked up me washbag off the chair and packed everything in. ‘Where is she?’ screamed the aul one from the hall. I could hear the two of them rushing up the stairs.
‘What did you do to my clothes? The jumper is ruined!’ Sinead roared, holding it up in the air. ‘Look at the rest of my stuff, Mammy!’
‘Where is that fool?’ screamed the mammy, rushing into the room. Then stopped dead, her red bloodshot eyes flying from me putting on me coat to me suitcase sitting packed on the bed. ‘You are not getting one penny in wages from me,’ she snorted. ‘Not until you have discharged every last penny for destroying the whole household’s clothes. Where do you think you are going, miss?’ she whipped, throwing her head at me suitcase, seeing me button me coat and lift me case off the bed. ‘You can put that suitcase back, for a start! Give me that case.’
‘Get your hands off my property, missus!’ I said, looking straight into her face and holding the case in both me hands.
‘Take that case off her, Sinead. If she attempts to leave this house, we will have the guards after her. I’m going to phone the nuns. She has destroyed our personal property! We will see what the nuns have to say about this. In any case, you can’t just walk out the door when it suits you, madam. You have to give me one month’s notice!’
‘Give me that case!’ Sinead said, standing in front of me and slamming out her hand. I stared up at her, seeing her eyes cold as ice, with her face made of stone. I’ve seen that look many times before. It’s the look of someone who thinks they are so far above you they can do what they like with you. The idea of even crossing this one hasn’t entered her mind. She thinks she knows me. I’m a fucking nobody from a convent, used to doing what I’m told. She leaned down, m
aking to take the case off me.
‘We’ll lock it away!’ shouted the aul one, standing by the door with her arms folded and her lips clamped together, with her red eyes spitting venom. ‘It can stay locked up until we can get a replacement for her. But I certainly intend reporting her to the Garda! In fact, I’m going to phone the convent straight away. Get that case, Sinead.’
I could feel a fire running through me veins but the funny thing is I feel icy cold at the same time! It feels like I’m taking on Jackser at his own game, someone thinking they can own me! ‘Missus, get outa me way before you regret ever clapping eyes on me. Outa the way, hatchet face,’ I said quietly, gritting me teeth at Sinead. She hesitated, taken unawares at the way I acted. I took off out the door, taking the stairs quickly but yet slowly. Like I wasn’t really in a big hurry.
I whipped the front door open wide, leaving me suitcase down on the ground, sitting it well away from the door, further down the path. ‘Come back here, you! How dare you behave in this fashion.’
‘Don’t worry, missus. I’m not going anywhere in a hurry! Not until I get what’s due to me,’ I said, holding out me hand for me money.
‘You are out of your mind. Me, owe you money?’ she said, curling her hand into a fist and pointing one finger at her chest, her eyes bulging outa her head with what she was hearing. A car slowed down and the aul fella drove up, parking the car outside.
‘What’s going on here?’ he barked, slamming the car door shut and wrapping the newspaper under his arm, trying to lock the car and keep his eyes on what was happening.
‘Pat, this little guttersnipe is attempting to walk out without so much as a by-your-leave! Can you believe it? After all the damage she has done! She has ruined all the clothes in the washing machine, including your best shirts. Your trousers are in shreds.’
‘What are you talking about?’ he said, looking at her with his face twisted then bringing his head back down to look at me, trying to make sense of what is going on.