The Cowboy’s Christmas Baby

by Carolyn Brown

  “It’s not that bad. We can eat and shower together later.”

  But they didn’t take a shower together or make love that night. Their closest neighbor, two miles away, slid off the road into a ditch. And all four guys left before the six o’clock news to help. Henry drove the pickup and Lucas took the biggest tractor they owned.

  At ten o’clock he called her to say that the neighbor and his wife had to be taken to the hospital in Denison, so he and Jack followed the ambulance. If they were treated and released, then they’d need a ride home.

  “I’m sorry,” he said.

  “It’s all part of ranchin’,” she said.

  On Thursday morning she woke up to another note.

  We brought them home. Wilbur has a few stitches on his head. Livvy has a twisted ankle. But it was midnight when we got home. See you at breakfast.

  L

  The rest of the day was a real bitch. The water to the washing machine froze up. She was busy thawing it out with her hair dryer and almost burned the chocolate chip cookies. Joshua fussed all day and wanted to be held.

  “Henry has spoiled you rotten to constant attention.” She rewound his swing but he still fussed.

  “Oh, all right,” she said as she took him out and carried him on her hip as she folded laundry with one hand.

  Henry had taken a pie and two dozen cookies with him and left right after breakfast to go over to the neighbors and sit with them all morning. Natalie wished she’d sent Joshua with him by the time the day was done.

  Lucas came in that evening and one look at him said that his day hadn’t been a bit better. So much for a shower and wild sex that night. She was worn out from a fussy baby all day. He was tired to the bone from hard work. They ate supper in silence and then Henry brought out the whiskey bottle.

  “I’m havin’ a drink.” His tone dared them to argue with him.

  “I’ll have a beer.” Grady went to the refrigerator. “Jack? Lucas?”

  They both nodded.

  No one asked her if she wanted anything. Maybe she still smelled like skunk or maybe she was a big part of the family and they thought she’d speak up if she wanted something or maybe Lucas was pissed at her about something. Even the cute little notes, which seemed more explanatory than sweet right then, didn’t make up for the fact that he’d been downright standoffish since she shot the skunk.

  She whipped around to see where Lucas was to find four sour-faced men at the table, three with beers and one with a shot of whiskey.

  “Pour two fingers of whiskey and join us,” Henry said.

  She picked up the Jack Daniel’s and poured a healthy dose into a water glass.

  “Livvy and Wilbur drove me crazy bitchin’ about how long it took the doctor to see them at the hospital. I wished I hadn’t even brought them a pie or the cookies. I even put one of them frozen dinners in the oven so Livvy could sit in her rockin’ chair, and she wouldn’t eat it. I bet Josh missed me, didn’t he?” Henry said. “Now I’m in a pissy mood. Lucas, I want you to drive me around the ranch.”

  She sipped the whiskey. It was warm going down, but it didn’t help her mood. It would take at least five tequila shots to chase the demons from her that evening and there wasn’t anything but bourbon and beer in the house.

  “Damned old tractor is about to drive us to cussin’,” Grady said.

  “About? I’m ready to shoot the damn thing like Natalie did the skunk,” Lucas snapped.

  “Buy a new one. Lord, boy, you’ve got enough money to buy a fleet of damn tractors,” Jack said. “He’s a tightwad, Natalie. Won’t spend a dime unless it’s so necessary he can’t get out of it.”

  “He sounds just like my dad.” She tossed back the rest of the whiskey.

  “Come on, Lucas. We’re going for a drive. Ain’t neither one of us fit for anyone’s company. Poor little old Josh would think we was both old bears,” Henry declared.

  Jack finished off his beer with a long gulp. “See you kids in the morning.”

  Grady sat there a few more minutes. “Weatherman says there’s a fresh storm brewing up north and coming this way. Might as well suck it up and get ready for another blast. He says this time there’ll be at least three inches.”

  “Well, shit! That means the coyotes will come closer because they can’t find food, and we’ll have to watch the young calves, and those pesky pups might crawl out of the fence again. They think they’re big enough to hunt with the big dogs already,” Lucas said.

  “I’m leaving too. See you tomorrow morning.” Grady put on his coat and hat and left.

  Henry put on his coat and Natalie watched him and Lucas both leave. She turned on the television and settled into Henry’s recliner with Joshua in her lap. In thirty minutes the back door slammed. From the noises, she heard Lucas hang up his coat, stop to pet and talk to the momma cat, and then pad to the living room in his socked feet.

  “I’m not your dad,” Lucas said.

  “I didn’t say you were. I said that you sounded like him. He doesn’t spend money when it’s not necessary either.”

  His chin shot up so high that she could see up his nose. “I’m not a tightwad.”

  “I didn’t say you were. Don’t take it out on me because your tractor is giving you fits. Joshua gave me fits today because your grandfather has him spoiled rotten, and I didn’t take it out on you,” she snapped.

  “I’m not taking anything out on you,” he said.

  “Yes, you are, and I did not say that you were my dad,” Natalie countered.

  “I’m not Drew, and I’m not your dad. I’m just me. Take me or leave me, but don’t be making me into someone that I’m not,” he said.

  “You need to get in a better mood or I’m out of here. I don’t have to put up with this shit,” she said.

  He pushed the chair back so quick that it crashed on the hardwood floor and Joshua started to cry. “Don’t you threaten me, woman!”

  “Don’t you call me woman. I’ve got a name. Either use it or don’t even talk to me.” She stood up, put Joshua in his swing, and turned around. He was standing there, arms hanging limp and anger on his face. She took two steps and her breast brushed against his chest. The heat was still there when she touched him even when they were fighting. Yes, ma’am, Mother Nature was a real bitch.

  “Well, that’s just what you are, a woman!” he said.

  “Darlin’, I am not just a woman. I’m a big cup of sass, covered in ornery sauce, with a splash of bitch, and a dash of pure old stubbornness thrown in for good luck. You remember that next time you think you can outshoot or outargue me,” she said.

  Joshua set up a howl, but she ignored it and continued to stare at Lucas.

  “Get your baby. He’s crying,” Lucas said and stormed out of the kitchen.

  She heard the shower running, but she’d be stripped naked and thrown out in the snow before she opened the bathroom door. She picked up Joshua and sat down in the rocking chair. He stopped crying and stuck his thumb in his mouth.

  She removed it and said, “Cowboys don’t suck their thumbs. They throw fits and pout, but they don’t suck their thumb.”

  He popped it right back in his mouth when she let go of it.

  “Maybe you’re going to be an artist or a ballet dancer instead of a cowboy,” she said.

  “The hell he is,” Lucas said from the hallway.

  “He’s my kid, as you so recently pointed out. And he can be anything he wants to be. If he wants to wear tights, cute little ballet shoes, and dance then he damn sure will,” she said.

  “I’m not fighting with you about this tonight, Natalie. I’m going to bed. I’ll collect on that shower later.”

  “And I’ll collect on the lovemaking, but tonight I don’t even want to look at you,” she said.

 
“The feeling is mutual.” He turned around and went back to his room.

  Natalie wanted to laugh or cry but she did neither. Instead she got her baby to sleep and took a long shower. She didn’t realize how stressed she was until the hot water jets beat the tension from her muscles.

  Natalie was asleep within seconds after her head hit the pillow. At two o’clock the baby woke up for his feeding and she changed him, made a bottle, and rocked him back to sleep. She’d barely gotten back in bed when she heard Lucas yelling, “No! No! I can’t tell Natalie.”

  She bailed out of bed and ran down the hall. She threw open the door to find him sitting up in bed, glazed look in his eyes, and shivering from head to toe. She crawled into the bed with him, put a hand on each cheek, and said, “Lucas, it’s a nightmare. Wake up, honey. Open your eyes for real.”

  “Natalie?” He blinked.

  “I’m right here,” she said.

  He grabbed her in a tight hug and buried his face in her neck. “Don’t ever leave me, Natalie. Hold me.”

  “I’ll stay, but you hold me,” she said.

  He picked her up and set her to one side, pushed her back on the pillows, and slipped an arm under her. He pulled her to his side and hugged her so close that she thought she’d smother. The shivering stopped and his eyes fluttered shut.

  Chapter 16

  “When did you start having these nightmares?” Natalie asked the next morning as they worked together in the kitchen. She browned sausage in a cast-iron skillet while he started the coffee brewing and set the plates out on the bar.

  “I had a few over there, but since I’ve come home, they’ve been almost every night. I’m beginning to doubt that they’ll ever go away.”

  Henry pushed the back door open and stomped the snow off his boots. “You doubt what?” A grin deepened the wrinkles around his eyes when he saw them hugged up together.

  “Is it ever going to warm up and melt all this ice and snow?” Natalie asked to get Henry talking about something else.

  “Oh, it will one of these days. In a few months we’ll forget all about the snow and the mess and we’ll all be bitchin’ about the summer heat. I heard poppin’ down at my place last night that sounded like shotgun blasts. It was limbs breakin’ off and fallin’ to the ground. When it does thaw out, we’re going to have a lot of dead limbs layin’ on the ground. It’ll take the work crew a month just to get the place back in some kind of order. What’s for breakfast this morning?”

  “Ham and eggs, hash browns, and biscuits. Anything else you want?” Natalie asked.

  “Ask me what I want. It won’t have anything to do with food,” Lucas whispered.

  She spun out of his embrace and picked up an iron skillet.

  “Looks like you might ought to sit down and stop teasing her.” Henry chuckled. “Where’s Josh?”

  Before she could answer the baby monitor said that he was awake and hungry. “Guess he’s awake now,” she said.

  “You go on with breakfast. I’ll take care of him,” Lucas said.

  “Diaper?” She raised an eyebrow.

  “You don’t think I know how to change a baby?”

  She smiled. “I’ll have a bottle ready when you get back with him.”

  “And I’ll sit in the rocking chair and feed him,” Henry said. “Wouldn’t want you to burn my ham and eggs.”

  ***

  Lucas picked Joshua up from the crib and laid him on Natalie’s bed. “Good mornin’, cowboy. Good grief, feller, you are wet from the hide out. No wonder you’re trying to eat your fists. All that milk you had last night has run straight through you. I bet your poor little tummy thinks it’s starving. Okay, now be still and I’ll get you all changed and fixed up for the day. We’ll show your mommy that two cowboys can take care of anything.”

  He unzipped Josh’s pajamas and peeled them off his body, then pulled the tape on the diaper. He’d barely gotten the new one under his bottom when the baby let a fountain loose that hit Lucas right in the chest before he could get the diaper thrown up over the baby.

  “Got quite an aim there, cowboy. When I get you all changed, we’ll have to change me before we go find your breakfast.” Lucas laughed.

  He chose a cute little outfit with a stick horse appliquéd on the front and a pair of white socks for Josh to wear that day. It bothered Lucas that Natalie and Josh were still living out of a suitcase. He made a mental note to tell her to unpack her things and hang them in the closet where they belonged. When Josh was fully dressed, Lucas picked him up and kissed him on the forehead.

  Josh looked up at him. Dark brown eyes met the same color eyes as man and baby bonded in the distance from one bedroom to the other. “I see why the rumors got started. I swear you do have my eyes, but then your daddy had the same color as I do. He was a hero, Josh. You can grow up proud that he is your daddy.”

  Lucas laid Josh on his bed and changed shirts. “Your dad was my best friend over in Kuwait. And he was your mommy’s best friend too. He would have loved to see you, but he died before you were even born.”

  He picked the baby back up and held him against his chest. When he reached the kitchen, Henry was grinning so big it looked like his face would split. Natalie’s eyes were misty and she was biting her upper lip.

  “What?” he asked.

  “Guess Mister Josh sprayed you down,” Henry said. “I remember the first time you did that to me.”

  “How did you know that?”

  “Heard it all on that contraption over there on the cabinet,” Henry said.

  Lucas’s face turned instantly hot. What he’d said to the baby wasn’t supposed to be broadcast all over the house. “We’ll have to be careful when we’re telling secrets, cowboy. Your momma has ears in the back of her head!”

  Natalie reached for Josh and hugged him tightly against her. He wiggled, squirmed, and fussed. “Good morning, sweetheart. Henry is going to feed you breakfast. You be good and eat it all.”

  “That’d be Gramps to Josh,” Henry said.

  “Humor him,” Lucas said softly.

  “Then Gramps, here’s the bottle and here’s the baby,” Natalie said.

  Jack came through the back door, but before he could close it, the puppies came rushing in again. The momma cat hissed and fluffed up to twice her normal size. She stood between the laundry basket where her babies were squirming and the puppies with a wicked gleam in her eye and screaming at the pups in a language that Natalie was glad she couldn’t understand.

  They all took off across the kitchen floor, yelping and howling, trying to get traction and sliding on their bellies all the way to the den where they hid under the leg rest of Henry’s recliner.

  “Damn dogs,” Jack cussed as he and Grady gathered them up again.

  Henry chuckled.

  “What’s so funny?” Jack fussed.

  “Provin’ my point real good. Y’all might want to look out in the front yard. I see something out there and I believe old Crankston’s goats are back too.” Henry laughed.

  “I’ll be glad when the weather clears up,” Grady declared.

  “It’ll all be fine,” Henry said. “It’ll all be just fine after this day.”

  “You been nippin’ in that whiskey too much,” Lucas said.

  “Now, Ella Jo never did see me drunk and she ain’t goin’ to this season neither,” Henry declared. “And I got a little job for you today, after y’all go out there and pen up them goats before they eat more of our decorations. You’re going to take Joshua and let him see all the animals on the ranch. The puppies and the cows in the barn, and even drive him up to Crankston’s place and let him look at the goats and the jackass from the fence.”

  “Why would I do that?” Lucas asked.

  “Because I’m old and Ella Jo done told me that’s what she wan
ts you to do for Christmas. So you’re going to do it,” Henry said.

  “Just do it if it’ll make him happy,” Natalie whispered.

  “Okay, Gramps, if it’s important to you.”

  “It is and y’all got to go by y’all’s self. No one else can go with you. Just you and Joshua. Bundle him up real good. It’s cold out there,” Henry said.

  “I’ve got plenty to do to keep me busy. I’d welcome thirty minutes without a fussy baby this morning,” Natalie said.

  ***

  After supper that evening, the guys hung around until the six o’clock news was over and then lingered until after eight before they finally left.

  “For three old fellers who were pushin’ so hard yesterday, they’ve sure managed to keep us apart today,” Lucas said.

  “They’ve got something up their sleeves. You can bet on it. I’m going to give Josh his bath and get him ready for bed,” Natalie agreed.

  “Josh, not Joshua?” Lucas asked.

  “Slip of the tongue,” she said.

  “I wondered if you’d catch it. He really is a Josh, Natalie. Joshua sounds like a preacher or a professor. Josh sounds like a rancher or a bull rider.”

  “That’s what Henry told me,” she said.

  “Will you sleep with me tonight? After you crawled in with me last night, the dream stopped.” He changed the subject so quickly that she was taken aback.

  She hesitated.

  He threw an arm around her shoulder and hugged her tightly. “I’m worn completely out, sweet cheeks. Those old codgers kept me at the grindstone all day after I took Josh for his morning zoo trip. He loves going to see the animals, and watching him smile and coo sure put me in a better mood. I agree with you. The guys have got something up their sleeves. I’m asking you to let me hold you and sleep with you and that’s all for tonight.”

  She barely tilted her head, but that was enough to keep the grin on his face.

  “When you get finished giving the baby a bath, I’ll hold him and feed him while you get a shower. Then I’ll take one and we’ll cuddle up here on the couch and watch television until bedtime. Deal?”