A White Picket Fence
Page 16
“Please.”
“We’ll have the sampler and two coffees, please,” he told the waitress.
“Where have you hiked?”
“All over the US, Canada and most of Europe. I try to hike a new area each year.” He told her of his trip the previous year to Austria, where he’d hiked over one hundred miles and stayed in a different town each night. “We had someone else transport our luggage, which was probably cheating, but worth it.”
“It sounds wonderful. I would love to take a trip like that.”
“Why don’t you? Your husband looks like someone who enjoys exercise.”
“Not that type,” she admitted. “He’s more about the competition. I can’t imagine him hiking without a purpose.”
Nick was leaned back in his chair with one leg casually crossed over the other, one of his hands lying flat on the table while the other rested on his thigh. “The purpose could be taking his wife on a vacation she would enjoy.”
“I suppose,” she said absently, wondering if Phil would agree to that type of vacation. “Did you take Brian?”
“No.” He chuckled. “Brian isn’t a hiker. I took Emily.”
“Your girlfriend.” Her heart dropped at the thought of him with another woman. “Logan said she’s very beautiful and very young.”
The corners of his lips turned up. “Yes to both. She’s thirty-one.”
“Wow.” She dropped her eyes. “That’s the same age as Phil’s…whatever. Must be nice for men.”
“Lina?”
“Just ignore me. I’m happy you’re happy.” Her eyes drifted to the band.
“What are you thinking?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Tell me.”
She knew telling him was wrong because she was married, but she spoke the words anyway. “I was thinking how lucky she is.”
“Because she’s thirty-one?”
“Because she’s with you.”
“Lina?”
She slowly brought her gaze back to the table, and her chest filled with heat at the desire so clear in his eyes. “Don’t look at me like that,” she whispered.
“I can’t help it.”
“I should leave. This is wrong.”
“You haven’t done anything.” He continued to watch her as the waiter delivered their coffee and dessert.
“What I said was wrong. What I’m feeling is wrong. The way you’re looking at me.” She turned and picked up her purse.
“Please stay. Please.”
“I can’t.”
24
Lina blinked a few times in confusion, trying to get her bearings. She was lying on her bed, wrapped in Phil’s thick white robe. “Phil?” she croaked. She couldn’t see him, but she sensed him. “Phil?”
“I’m here, baby.” He came into view with a look of concern etching his features. “How do you feel?”
“My head hurts and I’m thirsty.” She held her hand up to shade her eyes from the bedside lamp, and Phil quickly turned it off. “You’re all wet.” She noted he was still in his work clothes but was missing his jacket, and the fronts of his dress shirt and slacks were visibly damp. “What happened to you?”
“Here’s the Gatorade.” Megan’s anxious voice preceded her appearance.
“Open it for me,” Phil said to Megan as he sat down on the mattress beside Lina. He lifted her head slightly, slipping an extra pillow beneath it to prop her up before taking the bottle from Megan and holding it to Lina’s lips. “I need you to drink all of this.”
The cool liquid soothed her dry throat. As instructed, she didn’t stop until she drank the entire bottle. “Thank you.” Her voice was still husky but not quite as raspy.
Identical looks of concern were stamped across Phil’s and Megan’s brows as they watched her. “I found you in the hot tub,” Phil said. “You must have fallen asleep. The temperature was a hundred and two. I was very close to calling 911, but you were responsive, so I just carried you up here. I have no idea how long you were in there. Megan had been home for an hour, but—”
“It wasn’t my fault,” Megan interrupted. There were tears in her eyes. “All the lights were off down there. I assumed you were in your room.”
“Of course it isn’t your fault.” Lina squeezed her hand. “I’m fine. Just a little tired. I don’t remember…” She trailed off as the events of earlier in the evening came flooding back. “Oh my God,” she whispered. “Oh God.” Her eyes filled with tears, and she rolled over onto her side, turning her face into the pillow.
“Leave us, Megan,” Phil said.
“Why is she crying?”
“Just leave.” His attention was focused solely on Lina. He stripped off his wet shirt before stretching out behind her. “I’m sorry,” he whispered into her hair. “I’m going to make this better.”
She realized he thought she was distraught over the text messages, which she was, but at that moment she was consumed by an overwhelming sadness at the awareness she would no longer be able to have Nick in her life, not if she stayed with Phil. She thought of Phil’s infidelity and her shoulders shook harder, and then she was just crying. Minutes passed before the tears abated, and then she became aware of Phil’s warm body behind her, the hard muscles of his thighs pressing against the back of her legs and the feel of his chest sure and strong against her back.
“You saved me,” she whispered. “If you hadn’t come home and—”
“Shh. That would never happen. I’ll always keep you safe, Lina.”
“How did you know where I was?”
He pressed his lips against the back of her head. “I just did.”
She turned in his arms and looked into his eyes. “I need you, don’t I?” she whispered, trailing her fingers down his cheek.
“Yes,” he said deeply. “We need each other.”
Her eyes drifted over his face, his full lips, his strong jaw, the scar in his eyebrow from the impact of a lacrosse stick at seventeen and the laugh lines that had begun appearing around his eyes a few years earlier. A lump formed in her throat, and a lone tear ran down her cheek. “You hurt me,” she whispered.
“Oh, baby.” He brushed his lips gently over hers. “I love you more than anything in this world.”
“You broke my heart.”
“I know.” He kissed her again. “But I’m going to fix it.”
“How?”
“By loving you,” he began, kissing her softly on the lips, “and cherishing you.” He kissed her again. “And putting your needs before everyone else’s.” He kissed her again. “For the rest of my life.” He kissed her deeply, his tongue stroking against hers as he pushed her back against the mattress and moved his body over hers.
Lina kissed him back, desperately seeking the security she craved. They kissed for minutes as he seemed intent on communicating his love through just one kiss, and then his hand reached for the knot of her robe.
Normally, awaking to bright sunshine filled Lina with energy and optimism, but when her head was pounding and details of the previous day were already in the forefront of her mind, she just wanted to keep sleeping.
Phil had woken her twice during the night, once to get her to drink another bottle of Gatorade and a second time because he couldn’t tell whether she was breathing. She was, of course, but it took her thirty minutes to fall back to sleep.
“Mom?”
Lina opened her eyes, squinting up at Logan, who was standing beside the bed, his shoulders slumped and his usual smile missing. “What’s wrong?” she asked.
“Dad said I can’t be friends with Brian. I invited him over, and Dad said I have to uninvite him.”
She closed her eyes. “I’ll talk to him.”
“He’s never even met him. Why—”
Lina held up her hand. “Don’t worry. I’ll take care of it. Has he left for work yet?”
“He isn’t going to work today.”
When Lina gingerly walked into the kitchen, Alice was at the stove
flipping a pancake, Phil was at the table reading the newspaper, and Katie was sitting across from him reading from her Rumi book.
“I was out of milk, so I came here for breakfast,” Alice said. “What possessed you to fall asleep in a hot tub? Were you drinking?”
“No. It wasn’t intentional.”
“What are you doing up?” Phil was out of his chair and beside her.
“I’m fine. You shouldn’t have stayed home.” She touched his chest.
“I’m going to have to look at your chart and see what kind of aspects you’re under. That was dangerous,” Alice said.
At the mention of charts, her mother’s prediction of infidelity flashed in Lina’s mind. She gripped Phil’s arm. It was Nick. The prediction was about Nick. How hadn’t she seen it?
“Are you okay?” Phil asked.
“I just need coffee. My head is pounding.”
“You shouldn’t drink coffee,” he said. “You’re probably dehydrated. I’ll get you some more Gatorade.”
“I just want coffee. Please.” She let him lead her to a chair.
“Give her what she’s craving,” Alice said. “The body knows better than anyone what it needs.”
“I’m sure alcoholics would love that philosophy,” Phil said dryly. “And drug addicts and—”
“Always ready to argue,” Alice interrupted. “But in fact, I read recently that people use drugs and alcohol to self-medicate. There’s an imbalance they’re trying to correct.”
“So now you’re condoning drug and alcohol abuse?” Phil asked.
“No, I’m just explaining why their bodies may crave it initially.”
“Please stop,” Lina moaned. “My head hurts.”
“Would you really have died if Dad didn’t find you?” Katie asked.
“It would have taken a long time.” She looked up at Phil as he set a mug of coffee and a bottle of Gatorade in front of her. “Thank you.”
“Did he find you because you’re cosmic soulmates?”
“Alice, really?” Phil looked back over his shoulder at her. “Why are you filling her head with that crap?”
“Denying it doesn’t make it less true,” Alice said.
“Don’t believe anything she says,” he told Katie.
“How did you know to go to the pool?” Katie asked Phil. “Megan said you went there first.”
“Yes, how did you know to go to the pool, Phillip?” Alice turned from the stove.
“Lucky guess.”
“Ha!” Alice laughed. “And when Lina’s water broke three weeks early with Logan and you told the judge you needed a recess because your wife needed you, was that a lucky guess too?”
“That never happened.”
“Lina?” Alice prompted.
“I’m staying out of it.” Lina took a sip of her coffee, remembering how surprised she was when Phil, who was supposed to be in court all day, called within seconds of her water breaking.
“I think it’s kind of cool.” Katie was watching Phil with something other than distaste in her eyes.
“Mom, is that an engagement ring on your finger?” Lina’s eyes centered in on the classic-cut solitaire diamond on Alice’s left ring finger, and she had to concentrate to keep her mouth from falling open.
“Oh, yes.” Alice looked down at it as if she’d forgotten it was there. “Your father and I are engaged. I thought I told you.”
“No.” Lina shook her head and then grimaced when it began to pound. “I would have remembered that.”
“You can’t keep him from being friends with Brian Drayton,” Lina told Phil as soon as they were alone.
“The hell I can’t. I don’t want Drayton in our life. I don’t want you driving to his house to drop off Logan or him coming to ours. It’s going to be bad enough running into him at Gilman.”
Lina still had a dull headache, and she didn’t want to discuss Nick with him, but Logan was counting on her. “Brian lives with his mother. How about if we only let him go there? Logan genuinely likes him, Phil, and I think you would too.”
“This isn’t about Brian Drayton,” Phil said. “It’s about his father. I don’t like him. In fact, I dislike him, and I sure as hell don’t trust him.”
“Do you trust me?” she asked and then immediately felt a pang of anxiety in her chest, knowing she’d already been dishonest with him.
“Of course I do,” he said, making her guilt jump up a notch, “but I hurt you, and I don’t want some smooth-talking psychiatrist to take advantage of the situation.”
They went back and forth for minutes with neither backing down from their position, and then Lina remembered she had the trump card. “Logan said Brian’s the best lacrosse player his age in the state. Don’t you think that being around him would be good for Logan’s lacrosse game?” And with that one statement, a crack formed in Phil’s resolve.
“Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to let him come over once, since they took Logan to the beach.”
25
“Do you want to listen to the band jam?” Emma asked Katie. They were in Emma’s basement watching television, but the faint sound of music could be heard through the window.
“Not really.” Katie stared stubbornly at the television. She was still mad at Matt for lecturing her in front of the band two days earlier.
“Seriously? In a couple of weeks they’ll be away at college, and we won’t be able to listen to them anymore.”
“Matt’s not going to college.”
“Yeah, but there will be no one around to play with. He’s not going to keep coming here after Ryan leaves.”
Katie was having a self-imposed pity party as she lay in the hammock listening to the band. The spell hadn’t worked, and in a couple of weeks Matt would be out of her life. She was losing both Dr. Drayton and Matt. She wiped the back of her hand at the tears slipping from her eyes. She had been so sure it would work. She became aware the band was no longer playing a moment before she heard Matt’s voice.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
The hammock shifted as he dropped down beside her. “Tell me.”
She turned her head and found her face just inches from his. “Why do you care?” Her heart skipped as she looked into his eyes.
“Because I do.”
She shifted her gaze to the darkened sky. “I had to switch psychiatrists. I don’t want to start all over with a new one. I just want to stop.” It was at least half true.
“Why do you still have to go?”
She shrugged. “Because they’re making me.”
“You still mad at me for the other day?”
“I don’t know.” She couldn’t think of much beyond the feel of his body pressed against the side of hers.
“I don’t want you getting in trouble and disappearing for another six months.” The warmth of his breath tickled the side of her face.
“My parents weren’t even around.”
“Come on.” He climbed out of the hammock and held out his hand. “I need water.”
They joined a group on the big patio behind the house, and, for the next hour, Katie was in a state of heaven as she sat beside Matt, her body leaning into the side of his. He didn’t have his arm around her and wasn’t holding her hand, but there was at least a foot between him and the dude sitting on the other side of him, so the fact he was pressed against her side had to be a good sign.
At some point one of the kids lit up a joint and began passing it around the group. When it reached Katie, she thought about passing it along, but then figured if her clothes smelled, she could change into something of Emma’s before going home. She brought it to her lips and inhaled deeply. She held it out to Matt, but the boy on the other side of him intercepted it.
“Matt doesn’t smoke,” he said.
“Put that shit away!” Ryan yelled as he strode towards them. “What the fuck, man? You can’t have that here. My parents could come outside.”
Katie glanced at Matt, who was coming
to his feet. “Where are you going?” she asked.
“Home. I’ll see you around.”
“He just left,” Katie told Emma moments later. “He didn’t even ask if I wanted a ride. He was acting different tonight, like he might like me, and then after Ryan yelled at Dustin about the joint, he split.”
“Matt’s kind of anti-drug. I thought you knew that. He doesn’t like being around it.”
In the days after the hot tub incident, Lina resolved to concentrate on her marriage and family, but she hadn’t counted on Brian Drayton practically moving in and serving as a constant reminder of his father. From his deep-set eyes to the cleft in his chin and the way his lips turned up in the corners as if he were always smiling, Brian was Nick’s clone. Even the timbre of his voice was familiar, and on more than one occasion, Lina caught herself watching him and thinking of Nick with an ache in her heart. He and Logan became inseparable, and all of their time was spent at the Hunter house, probably due to the large expanse of grass Phil had turned into a practice lacrosse field a few years earlier and the teenage girls they lounged around the pool with when they weren’t practicing.
“Don’t you think she’s a little old for him?” Lina asked Phil late one afternoon when he joined her on the deck after work. Logan and Brian were at the pool with two girls from the neighborhood, and the one closest to Logan looked more like a fully developed woman than a teenager.
“He isn’t your baby anymore,” Phil said as he watched Logan wrap his arms around the girl.
Lina pulled her gaze from the pool. “Have you talked to him about…you know?”
“Sex?” He raised his eyebrows.
“Yes,” she sighed.
“I have. You’re really having a hard time with this, aren’t you?”
“He’s fourteen. That’s too young.”
“For sex, yes, I agree, but not to flirt.”
The sound of high-pitched screams and giggles floated up from the pool. “Their laughter sounds so forced,” Lina said. “I hope Katie and Megan don’t do that.”