More Than Ever (More Book 3)

by Sloan Parker

  “Oh God, yeah.”

  A few quiet minutes passed.

  Richard raised up so he could see my face. “You look relaxed.”

  “I am.”

  “Good.” He gave me a kiss. “We’re going to do our best out here.”

  “Yeah, we are.”

  And that was all I could ask for really.

  In the end, so long as I had them, everything would be okay.

  More than okay.

  Richard moved around to spoon me, and I laid my head on Luke’s chest. Several minutes later, Richard’s breathing grew slow and steady with sleep.

  Luke idly ran a hand over the back of my shorn hair. “Looks like we wore someone out.”

  “All this stress makes him tired.”

  “Yeah.” Then Luke’s hand stilled as if a thought occurred to him. “You think he’s okay? Physically, I mean.”

  “Sure. What makes you ask that?”

  “He said his grandfather died of a heart attack, and his dad’s had some heart and high blood pressure issues too.”

  “I think he’s good. He’s in great shape, takes care of himself.”

  “Yeah.” Luke started stroking my head again. “Have I ever told you that I’m really glad you took a chance with two older guys?”

  “You’re not that much older.”

  He scoffed. “Eleven years. That’s old enough. A relationship like this could’ve seriously freaked out someone your age.”

  I held him tighter and shook my head. “I was never freaked out. Not once.”

  He hugged me back. “I’m glad.”

  “You sure?” To show him I was kidding, I tickled him.

  He wriggled and laughed. “Stop. Stop. You’re gonna wake up the big guy. As old as I am, he’s way older, you know. He needs his sleep.”

  I eased up on the teasing but kept my voice light. “That’s true. We gotta let him rest after sex like that.”

  Richard let out a sleepy groan. “Fuck the both of you.”

  “You already did that,” Luke said. “Well, you fucked me. Pretty damn awesomely too.”

  I laughed more. “Awesomely?”

  “It’s a word.”

  Richard groaned again. Then he shifted closer and leaned over me to offer a soft kiss on Luke’s lips. “I’m okay, you guys. At my last physical, the doc said I have the heart of a twenty-five-year-old. No worries, okay?”

  I sighed. “Okay.”

  Luke didn’t say anything.

  “Luke…”

  “Yeah, no worries.”

  “Good. Now”—he sat up and playfully smacked my ass—“let’s get dressed and get in the tent, before some wild animal decides to take a bite out of this gorgeous ass.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  “You okay?” Richard asked as he ran his warm hand down my bare back.

  It was almost midnight. I was lying on top of him, and Luke was half on the sleeping bag, half on me, his cheek plastered against my ass where he’d landed after we’d climbed inside the tent, all of us still naked. We’d washed up in the water, then carried our clothes with us to the tent, but hadn’t had the energy to get dressed yet.

  “Yeah,” I said. “Just hate waiting until morning to start searching again.”

  “I understand. It’s frustrating as hell when something you really want is out of your control.”

  Luke chuckled, his warm breath tickling my ass cheek. “Trust him, Matthew. He knows about control issues.”

  Richard reached around me and pinched Luke on the back of the neck.

  “Ouch.” Luke turned his head and playfully bit my ass.

  “Hey,” I called out. “I wasn’t the one who pinched you.”

  “You’re closer. Pinch him back for me.”

  I laughed. “No. You pinch him yourself.”

  “What good is being in a three-person relationship if I gotta do all the pinching myself?” He tickled me along my sides, and I squirmed and laughed. Then he moved up to lie over my entire body, smashing me between them so I couldn’t get away.

  Richard got in on the action, helping Luke with the teasing.

  I laughed harder, wriggled more. “Hey! You guys were the ones who started this. Not me.”

  “But,” Luke said, “it’s more fun to make you squirm.” Then abruptly he stilled. “No. It’s just as much fun to get him. Come on, Matthew, we already got him pinned down.”

  I shifted sideways so we were both lying over Richard, and we attacked him, each tickling along one side of his ribs and his armpits.

  Richard bucked up under the assault, almost knocking us off him. “Stop. Stop. I’ve got something to tell you guys.”

  I let up on the tickles. “What?”

  Luke rolled to his back on Richard’s other side and groaned. “Matthew, you fell for it.”

  “I’m serious.” Richard stroked my cheek with the back of his fingers. He cleared his throat, but only silence followed.

  Luke snorted out a laugh. “Just say it, big guy.”

  Richard laughed too as if Luke had read too much into it and whatever was on his mind was no big deal. Yet when he spoke his voice held a note of self-condemnation. “I’m sorry I’ve been holding back so much.”

  “Me too,” I said. “I should’ve been clearer with you guys about what I wanted, about what I was feeling.”

  Silence followed as if we were all thinking that over. Then Luke lifted his head. “Me three.”

  I laughed, but I cut off the sound as soon as I spotted the pained expression on his face. “We got to this place together,” I said. “And I understand why you were both feeling the way you were. I really do.”

  “I don’t,” Richard said. “I believed you when you said you’d tell me the truth about what you wanted. I don’t know why I couldn’t let it go.”

  “You’re allowed to feel things. You’re allowed to make mistakes and freak out and be afraid of stuff. We all are. You don’t have to try to be so perfect all the time.”

  “Yeah. You’re right.”

  “He is,” Luke said. “I mean, look at me. I’m far from perfect at this relationship stuff, and you both still love me.”

  Despite the lighthearted way Luke had said the words, there was something strained and melancholy about the expression on his face.

  I raised up and propped myself on one arm so I could get a better look at him. “What is it?”

  He shook his head. “Nothing.”

  Richard lifted his head. He and Luke held a stare for several beats.

  Eventually Luke said, “It’s just… sometimes I still wonder…” He trailed off.

  “You wonder what?” Richard asked.

  “What it would be like if it were just him and me together, or you and me…” He shook his head. “It would never be the same.”

  “No, it wouldn’t.” Richard lay back down, and we all snuggled together again, my head on Richard’s chest, Luke on his other side, an arm draped over both of us.

  “No, it wouldn’t,” I echoed.

  * * * * *

  “If Alex was here,” Luke said in a slow, cautious tone, “or anywhere along the river, do you think maybe he drowned?”

  We were at our second stop of the day, near where we’d met up with Windtree River again. We’d hiked along the water’s edge until we reached a rock formation that Tomas had noted on the map, a naturally formed rose-colored sandstone tower. We took a break and drank some water, sitting at the base of the tower. We were all quiet for a while, surrounded by the soothing natural sounds: the rush of water flowing over rock and the calls of the birds chirping and singing all around us.

  Then Luke asked about Alex.

  “I don’t know,” I said.

  He waited a moment, like he didn’t want to say more. “He could’ve fallen from higher up, hit his head, and rolled into the water. Maybe his body got caught in some vegetation under the surface and that’s why the search dogs never found him.”

  “But,” I said, “then his truck woul
d’ve turned up somewhere. The sheriff’s deputies would’ve found it in a parking lot here at the park or along the side of a road near one of the trails. Even if he walked from Windtree into the park, his truck would be at the center.”

  “That’s what’s been bothering me,” Richard said with a grim note to his voice. “How hard did they look if they couldn’t find his truck, even out in the middle of the park? We’re not seeing that many places where he could’ve driven off-road.”

  He was right. If Alex hadn’t left town, and he’d been in the park that day, someone would’ve eventually come across his vehicle. This time of year there were hikers in and out of the park at all times during daylight hours. We’d passed several people on the trails during the past three days.

  Luke cleared his throat as if reluctant to mention his next thought. “Maybe he really did take off on his own. Maybe he just packed his bag and left, no note, nothing.” He turned my way. “Maybe he was running from something. Or someone.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “What about his wife?”

  “What about her?”

  “Could she have done something to drive him away? Or done something to him? Both Tomas and the sheriff mentioned their argument. It must’ve been a doozy. Maybe he was abusing her. Maybe she’d finally had enough and didn’t want him anywhere near the new baby.”

  I emphatically shook my head. “No. That’s not possible.”

  He threw me a sorrowful look, then glanced at Richard over my shoulder.

  “I hate to say this,” Richard began.

  “No.”

  He forged on anyway. “Matthew, some people are good at pretending to be something they’re not. You barely knew him and his wife.”

  I shook my head once more, then watched the river again, mentally running through every possible scenario I could come up with. “Maybe someone moved his truck after he got hurt.” Or after he died, but I couldn’t make myself say that out loud.

  Neither responded to that.

  “I don’t believe his wife did anything to him, but maybe someone else did, and whoever that was tried to hide what really happened.”

  Richard’s gaze narrowed. “I don’t like the sound of that.”

  And if my theory was even remotely true, he wouldn’t want us continuing to look into Alex’s disappearance, especially since at least a dozen people in the town of Majestic Falls knew we were out in the park, looking for what happened to Alex.

  I met his sharp stare. “We’re probably overthinking this. He probably got injured somehow and they didn’t look for him hard enough. Maybe he parked somewhere obscure, and they missed his truck during their search.”

  Richard continued to watch me, a long, grave look, but he didn’t say anything more on the subject.

  In fact, no one said another word, and it was strange, not our usual comfortable silence. We trudged on amid that heavy lull back to the trail we’d been on that morning. We checked one more of Tomas’s markers but came up empty again. We kept going as far as we could until the sun started to set, then found an open area to set up camp.

  We ate dinner and then crawled into the tent immediately afterward with no more than a few words exchanged the entire time. After we got situated for bed, silence descended once more, the same solemn stillness that had settled over us after our discussion at the river’s edge.

  Richard was still sitting up, his focus on the closed door of the tent.

  Maybe Luke knew what would happen next. He reached for the portable lamp and clicked it off. “We better get some sleep.”

  Once the light was off, Richard got under the sleeping bag. A few minutes passed. With their uneven breaths, it was clear neither of them had drifted off to sleep. Then Richard sighed and sat up, reaching across us to turn on the light as he did. He sat facing the door of the tent again, his legs bent, his elbows on his knees.

  Whatever he was going over in his mind, whatever he was about to say, I knew I wasn’t going to like it.

  “I don’t trust that sheriff.” He turned toward us. “I think you were right, Matthew. Whatever happened to Alex probably wasn’t an accident, and I’m guessing the sheriff was involved or he’s covering for someone else. Either way, I don’t want us tangled up in this for one more second.”

  I sat up. “But Alex could still be alive.”

  “The more time that goes by, the less likely that’s possible. Besides, I seriously doubt we’re going to find anything out here anyway. We don’t know how to conduct a search like this. We’re not trained for this kind of thing. If we’re all honest with ourselves, we’re just going through the motions here.”

  “No.” I scrambled past him and out of the tent, needing to move, needing some fresh air. They followed, Luke carrying the lamp. I took several steps away from our campsite, then stopped and turned back, gaping at Richard.

  In the dim light of both lamp and moon, Luke looked from Richard to me and then back. When neither of us spoke, Luke gestured at me. “We at least need to try. Matthew needs us to try.”

  “I know.” Richard regarded me with apprehension from where he still stood near the tent. “I know this is important to you, but if something suspicious is going on here, then I think it’s best we pack up and—

  “No!” My entire body shook as I glared at him. “This isn’t your call.”

  He didn’t say anything or try to approach me at first. Eventually he took a step toward me but then stopped as if he didn’t want to use physical touch to coerce me. “I really do get why this matters so much to you, but I will not put your safety or Luke’s at risk. For anything.”

  “I don’t care how dangerous it might be. I’m not going anywhere until I can at least prove Alex was in this park the day he disappeared.” Even as I said the words, I knew it didn’t matter. With our speculations about foul play, we’d already crossed a line that Richard couldn’t live with, and he wasn’t going to back down on this.

  But I couldn’t leave now. I couldn’t walk away after I’d promised Tomas I would help. We were the only ones looking for Alex. There had to be some way I could get Richard to change his mind on this.

  Before I could come up with anything, he said, “This isn’t just your decision, Matthew. It involves all of us. We are all in this together, and I want us to leave before we find out something that could put us in even more danger.”

  “No. I’m staying. You can go if you want, but I’m staying. Or are you going to try to make me do something else I don’t want?”

  As soon as the words were past my lips, I slapped a hand over my mouth. I wanted to take those words back, set them on fire until they burned away and there was nothing left of them, no evidence that I’d ever said anything like that to him. But that wasn’t possible. Those awful words were already in the air between us.

  Richard staggered back a step, his eyes wide, his parted lips quivering. He looked crushed, hurt in a way I’d never seen him before. I had no idea one look from someone could break my heart.

  Luke was carefully eyeing him too. Then he gradually moved toward me, holding out a hand as if he was afraid I was a skittish squirrel who’d bolt the minute he got too close. “Let’s all just take a breath.” He came in closer.

  I shook my head and took an unsteady step back, desperately wanting to sprint away from them, to go out into the night and get lost in the dark. I shook my head again. “Don’t.”

  Luke stopped.

  Tears welled in my eyes.

  Richard now had his focus locked on the ground before him, his jaw clenched, pain etched on his face. It surprised me more than anything when he lifted his head and met my stare.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean that. I just…” I swallowed and forced myself to go on. “I’m going to keep looking. With or without you.”

  He gave a measured nod. “Okay. Then it’s with us.”

  I wiped at my eyes. “Okay.” I turned away from him.

  It wasn’t long, and I heard one of
them approach behind me. I wanted it to be Richard so badly, to feel his solid arms around me, hear that deep voice whisper in my ear, but as soon as those two arms slipped around my waist, I knew it was Luke. He laid a hand over my stomach, and I frantically gripped it in mine.

  I heard the tent flap opening behind us.

  Pressing his lips to my ear, Luke whispered, “It’s going to be okay.”

  I wanted to believe that. But how could anything be okay when a good father like Alex was missing and I’d hurt Richard so badly?

  How could it ever be okay again?

  The tent door shifted again. Luke rotated us around as one. Richard stood just outside the tent, not looking any better. No one spoke for a long breath. Then Richard tipped his head toward the tent door. “Come to bed with me.”

  Luke let go of me, but I couldn’t move.

  Another grave pause followed.

  Richard let out a strained breath as if he had to physically expel the reluctance from his body before he could move. Then he made his way to us. He hesitated for another brief moment before he took my hand in his. “Please.”

  I nodded.

  He led me to the tent and waited for me to get inside before following me in. When I was situated under the sleeping bag, he slipped in beside me. Without a word, Luke did the same on my other side.

  I lay completely still, staring at the ceiling of the tent. I’d never felt so uncertain and uncomfortable around them. Not even the night of our first date.

  With surprising and sudden urgency, Richard rolled to face me. He pushed the sleeping bag out of the way, scooted down, and laid his head on my stomach. An arm around my hips, his hold firm but tenuous. I wasn’t sure if I should touch him or not. I softly laid a hand on the back of his head. Luke settled in on my other side with his forehead pressed to my temple. No one said a word.

  With one sentence, I had destroyed everything we’d managed to begin repairing over the last few days.