by S. R. Grey
I’m met with murmurs of assent.
“Okay, let me log onto my laptop and see if I can change our flights from, say, Saturday to Friday?”
“Sounds good,” Lainey says.
Grabbing my laptop off a nearby table, I pull up our reservations.
After scrolling through several available options, I tell the girls, “Okay, it looks like we can definitely fly into Minneapolis on Friday. That means we could roll into the lake house by about ten that night. How’s that sound?”
“Works for me,” Lainey says.
“Yeah, me too,” Eliza agrees.
With the girls on board, I change the reservations and receive confirmation.
“Ladies,” I announce, “we are all set.”
Lainey squeals, “This is going to be so much fun. Surprising the guys, I can’t wait!”
I add, “They’re going to be so shocked. I bet they’ll freaking love that we came in early.”
Eliza, though she likes our plan, laments, “I just wish Dylan and Chloe could join us.”
Chloe has really become a part of our girl crew. But there’s no way she’d fly up early with us. Not only is Dylan not even at the lake house, but with a baby on the way they’re both in full nesting mode.
Oh, well, that’s okay. We’ll see them soon enough at the wedding. They promised they wouldn’t miss Brent and me tying the knot for the world.
I remind the girls that we may have a chance to do something like this again, where Chloe can accompany us.
“After all,” I add slyly, “Eliza’s not married to Benny…yet.”
Lainey chimes in, “Yes, Eliza, when is that big lug of a man going to make an honest woman out of you?”
Eliza rolls her emerald eyes. She is so not a traditionalist.
“Who knows,” she replies. “But it doesn’t matter. I’m happy with the way things are right now.”
See what I mean?
“Still,” the ever-persistent Lainey presses, “I bet when you’re ready, you could totally bribe him with donuts to buy you the biggest diamond ring on the planet.”
Everyone knows about Benny’s penchant for donuts, so I jump right in on that too.
“She’s right,” I say. “Donuts are like crack to that man. They’re his kryptonite.”
Eliza snorts. “No way. You’re both wrong. Sex is Benny’s kryptonite.”
“Ooh, use that then,” Lainey says.
I roll my eyes. “Any chance to insert sex, Lain, and you just can’t resist.”
“Ha, ha. You just said ‘insert’ and ‘sex.’”
I glare at my sister. “Some of the shit you find amusing, Lainey… I swear you’re like a female version of Beavis and Butthead.”
Lainey snaps, “Hey, I can only be one or the other. They happen to be two separate characters, Aubrey.”
“You would know,” I mutter.
“Would you two just stop,” Eliza groans, even though she’s laughing right along with us. “And for the record, I’m not ‘using’ anything to make Benny marry me. When he’s ready, he’ll ask.”
She’s so damn chill. I wish I could be more like her. I need to remember that not everything has to happen at once. Things have a way of working themselves out over time.
Although a little nudge can never hurt, right? If sex is Benny’s kryptonite, then why not add something to Eliza’s arsenal?
I make a mental note to pack that Area 51 sex toy I promised her.
Come to think of it, I should really pack two. Who knows who else up at the lake house might need one?
Hmm, guess I am as much of a perv as my sister.
Oh well…
With that decided, I say to Eliza, “Hey, I’ll bring along that gift I promised you.”
Lainey snickers knowingly, but Eliza seems perplexed.
“Huh? What gift?”
“Buzzzz, buzz, buzz,” Lainey says. “Ring a bell?”
Eliza gets it then. “Oh, you’re talking about that sex toy you told me about at the club.”
“Ha,” I scoff, “you sound so unimpressed. I promise you, woman, this is not your everyday, average sex toy.”
Lainey chimes in, “Yeah, you’ll see. Just one word of advice—maybe close the blinds before you turn it on.”
I laugh, and Eliza asks, “Do I even want to know what that means?”
“Nope,” Lainey and I blurt out together.
I then add, “You’ll find out soon enough.”
“You two.” Eliza laughs. “You’re both so off the hook.”
I assure her then, “Just wait till we get to Minnesota. You’re about to see off the hook.”
I’m Not Surprised, You’re Surprised
My bachelor party is in full swing.
Well, I should clarify. It’s not really a party party. It’s more like five women dancing around seductively in nothing but G-strings for me and the boys.
The music beats out in the background, the reverberating bass punctuating the strippers’ sexy moves.
We’re in my upstairs living room, and the floor-to-ceiling windows serve to reflect back to us the seductive scene.
Yeah, the drapes are wide open.
But it’s nighttime, so who cares?
There’s nothing but wilderness out there, anyway. And call me crazy, but I don’t think the owls give a shit about tits and asses.
Damn, but I sure do.
I hate to say it, but these girls have my full attention, particularly when the tall, blonde dancer starts rubbing her double Ds against the little redhead’s full Bs.
There’s just something so fucking hot about the whole tawdry scene.
Maybe it’s the realistic expressions of lust on their faces, or that they can’t stop gasping every time their hardened nipples touch.
Whatever it is, I think they’re truly enjoying this shit.
Fuck.
Aubrey would kill me right now if she saw me, especially since my traitorous dick is stirring in my pants.
Good thing she doesn’t come in till tomorrow. That gives me time to take a bunch of cold showers and whack off like crazy till she gets here.
Once she does arrive, though, I am going to have her in so many fucking ways…
Just then the boob-rubbing girls move closer to me. Like we’re talking directly in front of the plushy chair I’m slouched down in.
I scoot back an inch.
Yeah, best to avoid too much temptation.
I haven’t touched a single girl tonight—I’ve just merely watched them—but I still feel a little guilty and a whole lot dirty.
I remind myself that this is no worse than watching porn. It’s probably tamer, actually. It just happens to be live and not on a screen.
I look over at Nolan and Benny, who are seated at opposite ends of the sofa. They seem to be enjoying themselves too.
And no wonder.
The other three strippers have migrated to in front of them, where they’re doing, uh, all sorts of interesting things.
Wait, is that girl licking the other girl’s pussy?
No, no, she has on a G-string. They both do, thank God.
I’d feel even worse about this than I already do if they were totally nude.
Shit.
I sigh.
I already feel kind of bad, and now I’m kind of ready for this show to end. It’s hot, sure, but I love Aubrey far too much to really get into it.
Call me whipped or whatever, I just don’t care.
I have a feeling Nolan and Benny feel the same way. I’m sure they’re enjoying the show, as well—they are men, after all—but they don’t look like they’re over-the-top into it.
Glancing down at my phone on the side table, I check to see what time it is.
Hmm, it’s after ten so there’s only about fifteen minutes left before the strippers are supposed to pack up and leave. Good.
I relax, content in knowing that this will be over soon.
But then the stripper with the double Ds stops wh
at she’s doing and asks me, “Are you the one getting hitched, honey?”
“Um, yeah,” I carefully reply.
“Oh, fabulous,” she squeals. “That means you, good-looking, get the special special show.”
“And what exactly does that entail?” I query, brow furrowing.
“This.”
She crawls up onto the arms of the chair, placing her knees on one side and her hands on the other.
Her body is basically stretched out over me as she asks, “Are you ready for the next part, big boy?”
“I, uh…”
Crap, her massive boobs are almost touching my lap.
That is so not good.
Before I can put a stop to this nonsense, and before I do something really stupid that I’ll regret forever, the redhead hands me a paddle.
“Go ahead and spank her,” she says nonchalantly. “By the way, she likes it extra hard.”
Oh fuck.
“Wait.” I try to hand the paddle back. “I don’t think I want to do that.”
“Sure you do,” the redhead insists.
Thankfully, Nolan notices what’s going on and comes over to put a stop to this now off-the-rails show.
But he gets no further than, “Hey, I think we’re done—” before he’s handed a paddle of his own.
“You get to go next, handsome,” the redhead says. “Or you can both spank her at the same time if you’d like. She’d really enjoy that.”
Help?
Benny is still over on the sofa, his jaw dropping when he hears that part.
Shit, this must look like a kinky setup for a porno.
I mean, let’s see…We have the obligatory naked blonde with her ass up in the air, looking like she’s crawling across my chair, and me, paddle in hand, appearing as if I’m about to spank her.
Oh, and let’s not forget the naked redhead and paddle-wielding Nolan.
Jesus.
Just then, when I can’t imagine things getting any worse, they do.
Yep, that’s right—I hear the one voice I would never want to hear while in a position like this.
But hear her I do.
“Brent?”
“Aubrey?” I squeak.
Fuck, this is really, really bad timing for my soon-to-be wife to show up.
What’s she doing here anyway? It’s not Saturday.
Aubrey repeats my name, sounding angrier than ever when she goes on to say, “Is that you under that…that…woman? Answer me, damn it!”
“Um, uh…” is about all I can muster at the moment.
I am so busted.
Nolan, sensing the catastrophe at hand, reaches out, and with one arm, lifts the stripper off of me.
Thank you, thank you.
I guess he realizes then that Aubrey is not alone, since he starts biting out a litany of “Oh fuck.”
Fuck is right.
Here comes fiery Lainey, heading right over to us.
She’s on a mission too, stomping her way toward Nolan.
He blubbers, “Ah, honey, I can ex—”
But she walks right past him, cutting him off with one mean-ass glare.
We then watch in horror—and, oh hell, maybe some amusement too—as Lainey grabs hold of Double Ds long blonde hair, hauls her ass back, and starts wailing on her.
That’s pretty much when all hell breaks loose.
Little Hellcats
My little sister, she always has my back.
And I have hers.
That’s why, when the blonde stripper chick with the giant boobs gets the upper hand, I race over to the rescue.
Nolan is doing his part to try and separate my sister from the dancer, but I get the job done when I yank the bitch off Lainey.
“Get the hell off of her!” I scream in Blondie’s face.
And then I wind up, ready to sock her one.
But before my punch can land, someone grabs my fist.
Huh?
“What the hell?”
I spin around, and it’s Brent.
I hiss, “You, you… You cheating bastard!”
I’m still mad at him, so I decide to hit him instead of the stripper.
But first, I grind out, “You’re an asshole. And to think I came up early for this.”
I try to smack him then, but he’s much faster than me. Easily, he catches my hand.
Damn hockey reflexes!
Spinning me around, he wraps me up in his strong arms.
He ends up behind me, holding me securely as I start to struggle. I might normally like this position, but not with what I just witnessed.
“Let me go,” I spit out.
“Stop fighting me, Aubrey,” he hisses in my ear. “I can explain everything.”
“Explain?” I pant, going lax.
Yeesh, kicking ass is exhausting.
Once I catch my breath, I seethe, “I saw you with my own two eyes, you jerk. That girl was practically in your lap, and you were about to smack her ass with a paddle.”
I look around, an idea brewing.
“Where is that paddle, anyway?” I mutter.
I see it, but Lainey’s beaten me to it. And she’s using the paddle in the way I was hoping to if I could’ve escaped Brent.
Yep, Lainey is whacking the hell out of the blonde and the redhead.
It’s funny, actually.
Both strippers are running around, jumping in the air, yelping and yapping as they try to avoid my sister’s angry swats.
If I weren’t so infuriated, I’d be laughing my ass off. But as it is, I just look around to see what else is going on.
The other three strippers have thrown on their shirts and are watching safely from the sidelines, way over on the other side of the living room.
Guess in the stripper world, everyone’s out for themselves.
I scan around for Nolan.
Oh, there he is, chilling not far from us.
“What are you doing just standing there?” I snap at him.
Brent’s arms tighten around me. He knows I have a love-hate relationship with Nolan, which is leaning heavily towards hate right about now.
“Go help my sister,” I hiss.
“Why would I do that? I’m enjoying the show far too much,” he snipes back, smirking. “Besides, Lainey seems to be doing fine all on her own.”
“Ugh, you, you…”
He makes me so mad that I start struggling again. If I can just get away from Brent, I can smack Nolan upside his smug head so hard that his teeth will jingle.
He sees me trying to break free and steps well out of hitting range. Smart move.
“Jesus,” he mutters, “you Shelburne women sure are violent.”
Giving up, since escaping Brent’s solid grasp is again a lost cause, I retort, “Like you don’t secretly love it.”
Cocking his head, Nolan says, “You know what? I kind of do, actually.”
Disgusted, I scoff, “You’re twisted, Solvenson.”
“So says the woman who came out of the corner swinging.”
Brent, who’s been fairly quiet up to this point, probably to avoid my wrath, says wearily, “Would you two just stop.”
Suddenly realizing I haven’t seen Eliza or Benny since this melee began, I ask Brent what happened to them.
“Where did they go?”
He shrugs, which feels kind of good since I’m pressed up so close to him. “I don’t know, Aubrey.”
Just as I’m allowing myself to enjoy the feel of a deliciously firm Brent Oliver, I remember something—I’m supposed to be mad at this man!
Snapping to my senses, I warn, “I expect a full explanation, buddy. I want to hear about everything that happened here tonight. And you better not have cheated on me or the wedding is off.”
“I didn’t cheat, Aubrey,” he assures me softly.
And you know what?
I believe him.
But I’m still pissed in general. Anger doesn’t dissipate that quickly.
I search agai
n for Nolan, as he’s usually a good target for my ire. But he’s on the other side of the room now, busy refereeing the Lainey vs. Blonde and Redhead fight.
“It’s about time,” I mutter.
He’s trying—in vain, I might add—to separate my fiery sister from the two strippers. Lainey has them in headlocks on either side of her.
I can’t help but snicker. She really is a badass.
Nolan finally succeeds in breaking everyone apart. And once the strippers are released, they scamper away.
My sister, looking up at Nolan, just kind of collapses into him. She’s clearly exhausted as he holds onto her sweetly.
Okay, okay.
Nolan may annoy the fuck out of me most days, but I have to admit he really is Lainey’s rock.
He disengages from her long enough to pay the strippers and send them on their way.
As they’re heading down the stairs, counting their cash, I notice that they don’t seem fazed at all by what just happened. I suppose stripping for private parties is often dangerous work. Tonight is probably just another ordinary day on the job.
Yeesh.
Once the strippers are gone, Brent finally loosens his hold on me.
“Are you going to be good?” he asks before he completely lets go.
I shrug him off and spin around.
Then I stick my tongue out at him.
Rolling his gorgeous whiskey eyes at me, he says, “That’s real mature, Aubrey. Maybe you need a paddling.”
Like he’s been struck with an idea, he cocks a brow.
Brat.
He’s employing a move he knows drives me nuts.
Of course, it works. I can’t help it. My lady bits come to life.
Yes, please.
Ugh, I need to refocus on Lainey and Nolan.
Er, well maybe not, seeing as they’re totally sucking face now.
“God, could his tongue get any farther down her throat,” I mutter.
Brent just laughs.
Since my sister and Nolan look like they might start screwing in the middle of the living room, I turn away.
That means the only thing left for me to focus on is Brent.
“Forgive me?” he rasps when our eyes meet.
I want an explanation even though I know in my heart he did nothing wrong.
Hell, who am I to cast aspersions?
I did my own fair share of ogling at naked bodies at my own stripper party just a few nights ago.