The Unexpected Choice

by Stephanie Taylor

  Stacey straightened a little.

  “No, it wasn’t a mistake. Your daughter has a mother she wouldn’t have had otherwise. So no, I didn’t make a mistake. You’re the one who made the mistake. If you hadn’t screwed up so royally, we might still be together and be raising her together.”

  And just like that, Stacey deflated.

  “Yes, I’ve told her I love her.”

  She waited with her ear next to the door, waiting to see what he said next.

  “No, I do love her. She’s an amazing woman… No, she’s not you, but she’s so much better in so many ways.”

  It was like watching a train wreck, Stacey decided. She couldn’t back away from the door.

  “My sex life is none of your business anymore,” he issued harshly.

  She heard him give a low chuckle. “Yes, we had some great nights together. But they’re over. I’m married, and I’m happy. Rachel’s happy.”

  Stacey was happy if he was happy. But would it be enough?

  “You should see her, Cam. She started smiling a few days ago. She looks just like you.”

  Stacey glanced in the darkness down at Rachel. Her eyes were drifting shut as her tummy filled.

  “I’d have to talk to Stacey about bringing her. I’m not sure how she would feel about it… Yes, I know you’re her mother, but you also made a lot of bad choices that took rights away from you, at least until you can straighten up when you get out.”

  Stacey’s eyes slammed shut. She wanted to see Rachel, which couldn’t be a good thing. Sitting in a cell all day gave her the opportunity to think about her choices, and that, above all else, scared her. She knew Joey wouldn’t have the heart to say no to her.

  When Rachel finished, Stacey burped her and put her back down. She drifted right back to sleep with her little fists curled above her head. Stacey smiled, enjoying the moments she knew would be fleeting, whether from taking their time together for granted over the coming years or from Cameron demanding visitation.

  Stacey padded into the room and slipped under the covers. Joey immediately came to her side of the bed and pulled her into his arms.

  Swallowing thickly, she asked, “Who was on the phone?”

  “Oh, no one. Just a wrong number.”

  With a great jab, Stacey’s heart slammed into her ribcage. He’d lied to her! How could he possibly lie after everything she’d done for him? He’d always said he’d never lie to her.

  Raising up on an elbow, Stacey looked him in the eyes, ready to fight.

  “I love you, Stace,” he said before she could speak. He trailed his thumb over her lips. If she’d been a little stronger, she could have resisted him, but she wasn’t. The tenderness in his eyes warred with his words still echoing in her head.

  When she didn’t say anything, he took this as an opportunity to kiss her tenderly. Stacey really wanted to bite him as hard as she could, but she refrained and selfishly enjoyed the moment.

  He finally pulled away and smiled at her sleepily, then hauled her back into his arms, holding her close.

  Stacey chose to keep silent. There was no telling when all of this would be taken away from her, and she wanted to make sure she had plenty of memories to look back on when Joey’s side of the bed was cold and empty.

  ****

  Joey had lied to her. How could he have done that to his wife? A woman who’d given up everything to help him with a situation he’d put himself in!

  That was just it, though. She hadn’t felt like she was giving anything up. She felt like she was cornered and Joey was her only shot at having a happily ever after. He’d give anything to take the moment back. To not answer his phone. To not engage Cameron in a wistful trip down memory lane on their sex life.

  Cameron might have been more adventurous in bed, but Stacey was sexy and the emotion between them surpassed anything he and Cameron shared.

  Still though, and this was the part that killed him to admit, it had felt good to hear Cameron’s voice. She’d called him often in the middle of the night when they were dating. At the time, he’d thought she’d been lying in bed thinking of him and had decided to come over. Now he knew with the power of hindsight she’d been out doing drugs, and he’d been a convenient place to rest her head as she came down off her high.

  In ways, he’d forgiven her for all the lies and deception, but he knew how it felt to be on the receiving end of those lies. And now he’d done the same thing to Stacey. The absolute last person on earth he wanted to hurt.

  The worst part was he thought she might already know. He’d seen the look in her eyes as she’d looked at him last night. He wasn’t sure what stopped her from saying anything. Maybe she wanted to see if he’d come clean. Or maybe she didn’t want to risk waking Rachel, but either way, he had to tell her the truth.

  As he pushed his scrambled eggs around on his plate, he watched as she flittered about the kitchen, getting Rachel’s bottle ready. Her hair was in that cute, messy ponytail he’d always loved to tug as a kid. She still wore workout shorts from her morning jog… a first since he’d been back in town. He didn’t even know she exercised but was glad she had done something for herself. She was giving up far too much for him already.

  “Stace?” he asked, not sure how to go about telling her he’d boldly lied to her face.

  “Hmm?” she asked, her voice deceptively quiet.

  “You know that phone call last night?” He shoveled a mouthful of scrambled eggs to give himself a minute to make sure he got the wording right.

  “I recall. The one you said was a wrong number?”

  He almost grinned at her sweet tone. He was so busted. And he hoped she’d slap him cross-eyed for it.

  “It wasn’t a wrong number.”

  She turned to look at him, her face a mask of neutrality. “It wasn’t?”

  “No, it was Cameron. A guard let her use his cell phone.”

  Stacey didn’t even blink. “Okay.”

  Boy, she was going to make him work for it. “I lied to you. And I’m sorry.”

  She turned and started wiping down the counter. “Why did you feel you needed to lie to me, Joey?”

  Wasn’t it the million-dollar question? “I don’t know. I didn’t want to upset you. And it was late.”

  “And you think by admitting you lied to me now makes it easier somehow?”

  “No. I guess I was a little shocked and needed some time to process it.”

  “What did she want?”

  Joey took a deep breath. “She wants me to bring Rachel to the prison so she can see her.”

  “And what did you tell her?”

  “I told her I’d talk with you.”

  Stacey spun around, her eyes flashing. “I might have agreed to act like Rachel’s mother, but I’m not. Whatever happens with your little girl is between you and Cameron. I appreciate you telling her you needed to ask me, but in reality, I have no legal right to her. The decision is yours and not ours.”

  “You're wrong, Stace. Even if we weren’t married, I have a feeling I’d be here asking you for advice. You’re my best friend.”

  Crossing her arms, Stacey gave him a motherly look. “Is that all you guys talked about?”

  Yup, she definitely had him. “No.”

  Without a word, she simply watched and waited.

  “She asked me if I was happy.”

  Stacey cocked her eyebrow.

  “And if you… pleased me.” He grimaced. Did honesty mean full disclosure? “She told me I’d made a big mistake.”

  When Stacey still refused to say anything, he stood. He ran his fingers through his hair in a frustrated move. “I told her I loved you and I was happy and the mistake was hers, not mine. I was doing the best I could to pick up the pieces.”

  “How did you feel talking to her?” she finally asked, squinting a little as she evaluated him.

  “Honestly, it was a little like old times. I didn’t have enough time to process everything that happened between us before you and
I got married. I love you, Stacey, and that’s not a lie. I think I’ve loved you since you were a little girl, riding your tricycle all over your yard. But I can’t deny Cameron and I had something once. I mean… the proof is sleeping in the other room. But what I wish would go away would be those what-if questions.”

  Stacey’s eyes drifted to the ground, a sure sign he’d said too much. “What if she comes back in eleven months and you divorce me? What then?”

  “I’m not going to divorce you. I know my relationship with her was toxic. A marriage would be worse. And on top of everything, Rachel would be in the middle of it all… Stace,” he said, bringing her to him. “We work. We fit. We make sense. We’re…”

  “We’re comfortable,” she supplied.

  “We are,” he agreed. “But it doesn’t make us wrong. If anything, I think there are a lot of people out there who are married who never achieve what we have. I’d take comfortable over diva any ole day.”

  She grinned a little. “I guess I just don’t understand what you want from me. You say you love me, but Cameron is still with you every day. Where do you see us in a few years?”

  Ahhh, a question Joey had tried to avoid because it meant letting go of the past. A past he didn’t really want to be associated with anymore, with the exception of his baby girl, but still found himself drawn to like a moth to the flame.

  “What do I want from you?” He mulled this question as he watched her pick at some invisible lint on her shirt. She wiggled her toes and waited patiently.

  “I want you to love me,” he said simply. And he discovered it was true. He wanted Stacey, all of her. Her heart, her soul, the next fifty years.

  “I do love you. You know that.”

  “I want you to love yourself.” Her eyes cast downward again, but she didn’t hold them there for long.

  “I do love myself, Joey. I love who I am when I’m with Rachel.”

  “What about with me?”

  “I’m constantly doubting. Am I saying and doing the wrong things? Should I have worn that instead of this? Will he leave me when Cameron is out of jail?”

  Joey felt floored. He knew this was a real fear for her. Even a fear for him, in the beginning. But somewhere over the course of the last few weeks, he’d come to realize Cameron had been merely a phase. A fun and exciting phase, but the excitement had dulled when he’d found out about her lies and deceit. She’d openly admitted she wanted him back once she was out of jail, but Joey had only felt pity for her because she couldn’t let go. They would need to work out arrangements for her to see Rachel, but other than that, Joey finally felt the bonds of their relationship lifting.

  Slowly, Joey stood. The lump in his throat kept him from saying anything at first. He walked up to her and pulled her into his arms.

  “There’s nothing I can ever say to you to make you believe I’m not going anywhere. So I’ll do the only thing I know to do, Stace.”

  “What?”

  “I’m going to prove it to you. It’s going to take me about fifty years, but I hope you’ll stick around long enough to know I mean it.”

  As he pulled back, he saw Stacey’s smirk. “I’ll hold you to it.”

  He nodded. “Okay. Deal.”

  Joey touched his lips to hers for a second. Thinking to be gentle and persuasive, he didn’t realize how much his need for this woman grew every time he saw her. He deepened the kiss, and she willingly accepted with a faint moan. She stood on her tiptoes to take all of him in. His hands roamed her back, holding her close and exploring her soft skin under her workout shirt at the same time.

  With a gentle shove, Stacey pulled away. “Rachel needs her bottle.”

  He watched as she filled the bottle with formula and shook it.

  “So what do you think about letting Cameron see Rachel?”

  At this, Stacey stopped shaking and her face twisted into something resembling an angry bear. “I don’t want my baby getting within a mile of her.”

  Joey couldn’t help the smile. Her baby. He liked the sound of that. He wondered if she’d ever be open to having children someday. But now wasn’t the time to ask, when she hadn’t slept more than six hour intervals in the last few weeks.

  “Then she won’t. As far as I’m concerned, you’re Rachel’s mother. No one else. We both have to make those types of decisions together.”

  “Well, I’m making this one, Joey. I won’t have Rachel being confused. I’m the one who loves her enough to sacrifice. Cameron was too selfish, and now she has to deal with her punishment.”

  Joey watched his wife again. She stood there, shaking the bottle again. Her mouth was set in a determined line and her eyes flashed with fire. She’d never looked more beautiful to him than at that moment, standing up for what she wanted, determined to make it happen.

  He nodded. “I couldn’t have said it better myself.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  The next six months were filled with more of the same. Together, Stacey and Joey had watched Rachel grow and learn. She’d slept through the night by three months old and had sat up by herself by six and a half months. Rachel was babbling, and her toes were her favorite snack.

  Joey watched Stacey grow, too. Instead of holding back what she was thinking, she often told him exactly what was on her mind. He loved to see her angry and expressing her opinion. He’d come to realize it wasn’t him who held the key to making Stacey more confident, but perhaps it was his daughter.

  Cameron still called occasionally in the middle of the night to see how Rachel was doing, and now Joey feared once Cameron was released, she might want visitation and take him to court for it. She’d hinted at this several times, but Joey never waivered from Stacey’s wishes. If she didn’t want Cameron seeing Rachel, he trusted her instincts and respected her enough to honor them.

  When Rachel was four months old, Cameron had called him, demanding again they bring Rachel to the prison the next week. This was Joey’s first true fight with Stacey. She’d held a crying Rachel to her breast as if protecting her, shielding her from the world, and Stacey told him in no uncertain terms if he caved and took Rachel to see Cameron, she’d leave him.

  At first, he’d been shocked. Then mad. Then proud as punch his wife was standing nose to nose with him, fighting for his daughter’s welfare. He’d immediately kissed her and just like that, the fight was over and the subject was dropped.

  They had fallen into a comfortable rhythm with each other. Stacey played the housewife part perfectly. Enough that Joey felt guilty she did so much. Sometimes, when she’d had a particularly rough day with Rachel while he was at work, he’d bring home takeout and give her a massage after dinner. Their life was as picture perfect as Joey could have imagined. More so, when he really thought about it.

  On weekends, sometimes he gave her money, and she went shopping with his mother. And he couldn’t have been more surprised when Stacey came home one day after shopping with a brand new wardrobe, a new, straight hairstyle and missing her glasses. He was happy her cliché duct taped glasses were finally gone, and she now wore contacts. He could gaze into her beautiful green eyes any time he wanted without the light glaring back at him. It was like being married to a different woman now. She’d never been one for fashion, but seeing her in calf-high boots and skinny jeans went a long way to making his mouth water for his wife. Although Joey still preferred her curly hair, the straight was growing on him a little more.

  It was during that time he knew things were changing for her… not just outwardly, but inside, too.

  It seemed little Stacey Ingram McCrary hadn’t needed him after all to make her into a confident, beautiful woman. She handled Rachel with a precision that left him amazed. He didn’t think he’d ever be good at changing a diaper or making up a bottle or mixing baby cereal with milk. She could practically do it with her eyes closed. Probably did during the night.

  Then there was the bedroom. Over time, Stacey had grown accustomed to his touch, vocalized what she wanted him t
o do, and left no room for argument when it was bedtime and she was in the mood. She even wore sexy lingerie and blew him away with her svelte curves and wild moves. Her self-confidence was sexier than anything she could wear, and Joey was proud to call her his wife.

  It was also during that time, almost seven months after their marriage she experienced her first orgasm. To say he was excited was an understatement, but the look on her face was a memory he would cherish for the rest of his life. It was the kind of bond God had always intended someone to have with their spouse. And he tucked it away, deep inside him so he could recall it during the days to come.

  Two days after Rachel turned seven months old, Joey received a phone call at work. His lawyer was letting him know Cameron was up for parole early due to good behavior. A knot twisted in his gut, and nausea threatened to choke him. Everything he and Stacey had worked for in the last seven months was now at stake.

  The hearing was set for the following Tuesday. If she was granted parole, she’d then be able to seek visitation rights. The paperwork she’d signed upon entering the prison system would be null and void. His lawyer tried to assure him he’d keep that from happening, but he knew the statistics with mothers and babies. Very few judges felt it was necessary to abolish all contact.

  As Joey trudged into the house after work, he wondered how Stacey would take the news. Would she be angry? Retreat back into a shell? Or would she fight for his daughter and her happiness?

  But a bigger question flowed into his mind as he entered the front door and looked at Stacey. Her blonde hair flowed around her face as she blew a raspberry at Rachel and then turned those glowing, expressive green eyes toward him and smiled.

  Would she give up on them?

  ****

  Stacey knew something was on his mind. Maybe it was his charmingly tousled hair, as if he’d run his fingers through it a million times on the way home, or maybe it was the defeated slouch of his shoulders as he walked through the doors, but she knew something was amiss.

  “Bad day?” she asked, hefting Rachel on her hip and walking up to Joey for a kiss.