Origins (A Black Novel, #1)
Page 17
I’m going to die anyway, at least let me help you before I do.
Let me save you. ”
A choked sob escapes my lips and I shake my head resolutely, determined to save him, to save us all. There has to be something I can do, some way to fix this. Please, please, he can’t die. I won’t be able to live with myself if he’s gone. He’s been with me my entire life, through all the good and the bad. He was there holding my hand helping me cross the street when I was five, teaching me how to ride a bike at seven. He was there when I hit puberty….. He was there for me when Tessa Sparks told everyone in third grade that I had been the reason my mom died, and again when I had lost my virginity at sixteen and the guy never called me…. He was always there, always helping and watching over me. I can’t lose him.
“Do it! Goddamn it Adelin, I’m trying to help you. If you don’t do this your mother will die…. You will die. We will all die and I won’t let that happen. DO IT!!”
He grips my face harshly and pulls me in, forcing me closer to the scent of the blood. My eyes remained locked on his, a silent plea evident in their depths, until the smell hits me, causing my nostrils to flare and my mouth to water in anticipation. I howl in aguish as I lean in towards the blood, sickened and yet unable to tear my eyes away. The blood calls to me, singing its deceptive siren song and enticing me with its bitter sweetness. And I am weak to its seduction.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Lucien
A bone chilling, primitive scream erupts out of the darkness, startling me, and I race into the house. Screw waiting like Vraiden said, that sounded like Adelin and I’ll be damned if I’m going to let anything happen to her. The scream echoes through my ears as I bust through a door to find Adelin, bruised and bloody, hunched over in the middle of the room, howling in despair. I quickly scan the room but see no signs of Eris or my brother. My eyes narrow in anger as I realize her arms are wrapped protectively around a motionless body. Sobs shake her as she rocks back and forth, her head thrown back, obscuring her face.
I gently reach out and rest my hand on her shoulder.
“Adelin?”
Her eyes flash open, head jerking toward me. Her eyes are no longer the beautiful grey-green they once were, instead they are a colorless grey, flat and emotionless. Tears flow freely from her eyes, the salty wetness mixing with lingering bits of dirt to create lingering trails the color of ash. There is blood smeared across her mouth and chin, the smell telling me that it’s fresh- and mortal. It’s not her blood. What has Vraiden done? He had left me to wait outside, instructing me not to come in no matter what because it might affect Adelin’s safety. What did he make her do before he took off? Where did Eris and him disappear to?
“Don’t touch me!” she shrieks shrilly, eyes wild. She looks so vulnerable, so damaged.
I am instantly transported back to the moment when I made my first kill- it took place many years ago, back when Vraiden and I still got along. He had already sealed his Immortality years before and had been trying to talk me into doing the same ever since. We had gone out for a drink and he had talked me into quite a few more than one. On the way home we were laughing and joking around when we had stumbled across a mortal girl in an alley.
Vraiden had toyed with her at first, teasing and charming her in a way only he could. It hadn’t taken him long to tire of her though and he had begun taunting the girl, flaunting his mind control which he had gained when he’d sealed his Immortality. He had made her do things- terrible things. He’d made her get down on her hands and knees, right there in the alley in her short skirt, and crawl on the filthy ground until her hands and knees were raw and bloody. Then he’d made her slowly lick the blood off of the palms of her hands, all the while looking at me, pleading at me to taste her.
It had taken every ounce of strength I’d had to hold back, to not step forward and wrap her in a lovers embrace and sink my aching teeth into her flesh and bleed her dry. Vraiden, as always, wouldn’t let it stop there and my refusal only spurred him into taking it further. He’d made her take a broken bottle and cut herself until she was drenched in her own blood. The smell of it had ignited my hunger further, causing me to salivate uncontrollably. I don’t know how but somehow I had managed to hold my ground, to not taste the innocent, broken girl.
It was then that Vraiden had released his hold on her, setting her mind free, before he had wrestled her to the ground and attacked her. He had laughed as his mouth found purchase on her wounds. I had turned around and ran then, the sounds of her screams and desperate pleas echoing in my head the entire way home.
I had burst in through the front door, startling Lissa, my mortal girlfriend. We had fallen in love several years before and been inseparable ever since. I had told her not long after we had started dating who, what, I was and she had remained by my side, loving me unconditionally. She hadn’t been able to stand the thought of me ever hurting anyone and had refused to let me feed on anything, anyone, but her.
As soon as I saw her standing there, eyes wide, in front of me in the living room, the scene in the alley had rushed back in.
The screaming, the crying, the begging, the enticing scent of her blood…..
It wasn’t until Lissa went still, lifeless in my arms that I realized what I had done. I had attacked her, drained her. If she had screamed, I hadn’t heard it. If she had fought, I hadn’t felt it. I had murdered the only girl I had ever loved and I hadn’t even realized I’d done it. I looked down at her, my heart beating erratically in my chest as a gnawing pain settled in my stomach. There was no going back. She was dead. My head fell backwards, a scream tearing through the silence. I had cursed Vraiden’s very name then, vowing to bestow a fate worse than death upon him.
I blink, refocusing back on the present, and shake my head to clear the memories of the past away. “Adelin,” I whisper as I pry her hands off her dead father. “It’s done. There’s nothing you can do. He’s dead.” I gently rub circles across her back in an attempt to try and soothe her. Her body shakes uncontrollably as silent sobs course through her and she sags backward against me, seeking comfort.
Gently I scoop her up into my arms and stroke my thumb tenderly over her cheek. “I promise Vraiden will pay for what he’s done to you.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Vraiden
I didn’t have a choice, I looked right at her and I lied. “The same way I influenced you into thinking I loved you,” I reply coldly. “It’s one of my gifts. I can make anyone do whatever I want. This,” I continue, motioning between Adelin and myself, “was nothing but a game. I don’t love you.
How could I ever love you?”
The expression on her face is enough to break my heart, to make me feel like less than a man. She would never be able to forgive me for this but there is no going back now. I’d rather live my life with her alive, even if she hated me, then live it knowing she died.
Acknowledgements
First and foremost I’d like to give a giant thank you to my almost-husband, Bill. Without you nothing is possible. Similar credit goes to my three wonderful, crazy children: Levi, Kale and Blake. You make life worth living. Every day with you four is a new adventure that I can’t wait to take part in.
A very special thank you goes out to Melissa, who no matter what anyone says, had first dibs on Luc.
Without you this book wouldn’t be the masterpiece you now hold in your hands. Thank you for your valuable feedback and crazy opinions. Only you could’ve asked the questions you asked and helped in the ways you did. Not only did you provide emotional support, you were also my sense of comic relief. The hours you spent analyzing and reanalyzing my book are well beyond countless and I will never be able to repay you. You are my editor, my friend, my muse, my common sense and the best
proofreader and beta reader in the universe!! (And even though you won’t let me call it ‘our’ book there’s no way I would’ve gotten this far without you)
Behold the mighty Jessouke!
A ginormous thank you goes out to Steven Askew, who unselfishly allowed me to use – and mutilate –
his gorgeous artwork for my cover. For more artwork done by the amazing artist please visit
www.redandblackwallpapers.com and show your support! (I hear he likes coffee)
Big hugs and kisses to Aerinn, Asiye, and Tracy who went above and beyond with praise, words of encouragement, questions and all the times you guys just kept me entertained via email and text messages. Also, a quick thank you to Ayush, Dan, Jake, Penny, and Rachel who offered to help proofread, critiqued or just filled my inbox more than once with your words of encouragement and questions. (Book 2 is coming…)
I would also like to thank all of the members at
www.perusingtheshelves.com for making the site the best book site in the history of the internet, for making me smile no matter my mood and for giving me a home away from home, not to mention the positive feedback and encouragement.
Last but not least, I would like to give a very huge thank you to Ashish who believed in me as soon as he discovered I was writing this book and unselfishly set me up a website for my book. Thank you!! There are no words to express how honored I am.
And then there’s you, the readers. Thank you for taking the time to read this novel. I hope you enjoyed it half as much as I enjoyed writing it. I started this novel 3 years ago and have put every emotion, every bit of myself into the words that fill these pages. My biggest dream was to be an author, to create and share something I loved with others who had the same passion so – no matter how big or small – don’t give up on your dreams because with the right amount of dedication and encouragement, they can become a reality.
About the Author:
Jessa L. Gilbert lives in southeastern Iowa with her almost husband and 3 wonderful, crazy little boys. She enjoys reading, writing, hiking, video games and movies in her spare time. She is addicted to french fries, mountain dew and rock music and loves animals, zombies and the smell of cinnamon. Origins (A Black Novel, Book #1) is her first full length Young Adult novel.
Visit Jessa at:
www.jessagilbertbooks.com
A Black Playlist:
Again – Flyleaf
Awakening – Damning Well
Counting Bodies Like Sheep to the Rhythm of the War Drums – A Perfect Circle Do What You Do – Mudvayne
Feel Like I Do – Drowning Pool
Figured You Out – Nickelback
Fully Alive – Flyleaf
I’m Not Jesus (ft Corey Taylor) – Apocalyptica Jars – Chevelle
Judith – A Perfect Circle
Just Like You – Three Days Grace
Little Lion Man – Mumford & Sons
Made of Scars – Stone Sour
Nightmare – Avenged Sevenfold
Prelude 12:21 – Afi
The Red – Chevelle
Revelation 22:20 – Puscifer
Scream – Avenged Sevenfold
Scream With Me – Mudvayne
Spaceship – Puddle of Mudd
Stricken – Disturbed
The Undertaker (Renholder mix) – Puscifer
Well Enough Alone – Chevelle
Where Are You Now – Mumford & Sons