“I fully intend to,” he offers and shakes Malcolm’s hand again.
We walk the few steps to the patio door, Tristan pulls it open and lets them out, they both wave, then turn and walk out of view.I try to control the anger I feel rearing up inside of me.
So, to try and take my mind of it I decide to clean the kitchen up. As Tristan shuts the door, locks it and pulls the curtain back across, I’m already at the kitchen rinsing everything off before I start washing up.
“Hey,” I feel Tristan behind me. His arms wrap around my waist, his head rests on my shoulder. “You want to talk about it?” I shake my head rapidly.
“I....not now,” I answer my voice wobbling with anger.
“Coral, it’s not good to bottle things up’ – “Tristan please, I’m trying really hard to use all the techniques I’ve learned in therapy so I don’t let the anger take over. Please give me some space, let me calm down.” I beg.
“Oh ok,” he says. “Shall I dry?” I know he’s smiling.
I stop what I’m doing and turn my head around, I can’t help smiling back at him.
“How about some music?” I say.
“Ok,” he chuckles.
“My MP3 player is on the side, next to the amp.” I gesture with my chin.
As I’m filling the sink with hot soapy water, UB40s Can’t help falling in Love starts playing. It instantly lifts me. I wonder if Tristan picked this one on purpose?
Tristan is back just as I’ve washed the first plate up.
“Tea towels?” he asks.
I point to the cupboard next to me, I watch him bend down and pull out a clean one. I can see all the muscles in his back ripple through his t-shirt. It sends shock waves down to my nether regions, I clamp my legs together and try to ignore it.
“You like reggae?” Tristan asks taking the plate off me, but my mind is already undressing him. Kissing him all over and wondering what he will taste like, and whether he will fit me like a glove; like he was made for me.
“Coral?” He prompts.
“Hmm?” I turn and lock eyes with him.
“You ok?” he chuckles.
“Uh-huh.” I can’t seem to make my brain work properly.
“Reggae?” he asks again.
“Oh right, yeah…I really like it,” I answer dreamily…
IT DOESN’T TAKE LONG TO CLEAN UP THE KITCHEN and as I check myself, I notice my anger at Gladys has completely dissipated. Tristan must be some kind of drug to me or something, I think I’m getting very, very addicted.
“So what would you like to do now?” he asks.Oh boy!
I wish he hadn’t just asked that question. How about I’d like to rip your clothes off and make passionate love to you – But I know I look hideous at the moment and I want it to be right, to be special.
“Coral.” Tristan takes my face in his hands. “Where are you?”
I clear my throat and try to settle my rapidly beating heart.
“Sorry...I just...” I smile up at him. The room fills with that same bubble of electric. I feel the pull from him so I lean up on my tip toes so I can reach his lips – Tap, tap, tap – Who the fuck is it now?
“I’ll get it,” I say gritting my teeth. As I pull the curtain across I see it’s Bob with his empty plate. “Hey Bob,” I say as I open the door.
“Delicious as usual Coral, just like you,” he croons.
I roll my eyes and take the empty plate off him.“You want to come in?” I ask.
He shakes his head at me. “No thanks, I’ve got Top-Gear recorded,” he says his eyes twinkling.
“Oh ok, enjoy,” I smile. Bob leans forward and for the first time ever, he pecks me on the cheek.“Aren’t I the lucky girl,” I giggle. His cheeks blush as he smiles back at me, then he clocks Tristan inside and narrows his eyes.
“Looks like I’ve got some competition,” he croaks.
I glance at Tristan and raise my eyebrows, trying my best not to burst into a fit of giggles.
“I think you may have Bob, but don’t worry you’ll always be my favourite,” I say squeezing his wrinkly hand.Bob looks back at me in the most peculiar way. I think he is actually serious, and in fairness, if Bob was my age I think I would be hard pressed to ignore him. He was a real dish in his younger days.“Want me to get you anything?” I ask.
“No darling you’ve done enough,” he smiles and walks off. I watch him get inside his studio, then I shut the patio door, and pull the curtains across.
“I think he’s in love with you.” Tristan pipes up.
“Don’t be daft.” I choke, laughing nervously.
“I’m dead serious,” he argues.
My face falls, all humour instantly dissipating within me.
“Are you kidding me?” I squeak, suddenly wondering if I’ve actually been leading a lonely old man on. I run my hands through my hair. “Do you think I need to have a talk with him?” I ask.
“I’d leave it as it is,” Tristan answers. “Maybe having the fantasy of you is what’s keeping him going.”
I frown at that one, pick up my wine glass and finish it off. “More?” I ask Tristan.
“I’ll get it. We still have time for the movie, how about some popcorn to go with it?” He smiles, but it’s a little off. So he wants to watch the movie with popcorn? Boy I’m going to feel bloated tomorrow, nothing but salad.
“You ok?” I ask as I put the bag in the microwave.
“You really meant it didn’t you, about not liking yourself.” Tristan is frowning deeply as he fills up our glasses.
I feel myself close up, shut down - withdraw.I shrug my shoulders at him.
“You should see yourself more clearly,” he adds.
I glance across at him then find my big bowl out the cupboard for the popcorn. As we both sit down on the sofa, I feel myself tense up and I don’t know why.
“Coral, relax, you want to talk about what went on earlier?” He softly asks.
I nod, feeling glad I have someone to talk it out with.
“Debs is leaving, her house is up for sale and she didn’t tell me, and she knew about Malcolm ages ago. I asked Gladys why she didn’t tell me but she avoided the subject. I asked them both if there’s something more going on, they didn’t deny or confirm it. I know they are both hiding something, I just don’t know what. And with everything else going on, Joyce leaving, my job, Rob not talking to me, the last thing I need is to find out my own family are...” I shake my head in wonder.
“I’m so glad you’re here Tristan, and I’m not just saying that because I feel lonely,” I exhale heavily. “Weird really, it’s like all this crap happened just as you turned up...Shit, that sounds bad, I mean’ – I shake my head – ‘I don’t know what the fuck I mean.” I blurt running my hands through my hair in frustration.
“Hey,” Tristan rubs my back. “I’m glad I’m here too,” he tells me softly.
I turn and look into his deep soulful eyes.“Sorry, what I meant was it’s like you turned up at the right time, to be here for me while all this is going on. Does that make any sense?”
“Yes it does,” he chuckles then leans closer and wraps his arm around my shoulder.
“I’d be freaking out if you weren’t here, I know I would.” I mumble.
“I don’t think you would be,” Tristan argues.
“Oh I would, you might not see it on the outside but’- I tap my head - ‘on the inside I’d be cracking up.”
Tristan sighs heavily. “Who do you go to when you’re upset or worried about something?”
“It used to be Gladys, then I met Rob,” I answer immediately.
“So if he was around to talk to, you would be ok about everything else?”
“Maybe, Rob helps me. He says I take life too seriously. He helps me look at life from a different perspective and helps calm my wayward thoughts.” Tristan smiles so deeply his dimples are on full wattage, he cocks his head to the side as though he’s worked something out.
“What?” I mumble.<
br />
“That night in Iguana’s, you were with Rob?”
“Yeah?” I frown wondering where he’s going with this.
“And you told me you don’t normally go out drinking on a weeknight?”
“Yeah?”
“Oh to be a fly on the wall and hear what that conversation was about, but I have a pretty good idea,” he says smugly.
“Well a fly in a restaurant is not a good idea.” I answer dryly hoping he doesn’t ask me.
Tristan chuckles hard. “You did not know where to put yourself when I turned up.”
I sigh, caught out!“No, I didn’t,” I answer taking a gulp of wine.
Tristan stops laughing and moves so close to me, I can feel his breathe on my cheek.“You were discussing me,” he whispers in my ear. My heart starts manically beating. “I knew you felt it too, that moment when we met in reception,” he adds.
I slowly turn and meet his heated gaze, it’s deep and so soulful. His eyes have dilated, his cheeks are flushed, his breathing heavy, and he’s radiating sexiness.
“Yes,” I whisper my breathing just as hard.
Tristan leans forward, I think he’s going to kiss me, my mouth instantly goes dry, he’s so close –“What happened to you Coral?” I frown back at him. “In the car you told me you find men creepy. I can understand you being the way you are because of your parents and their complete lack of care for you. But something else happened, what is it?” I clam up inside.“Coral!” He admonishes.
I slowly turn away from him trying to keep as calm as possible. “I c-can’t...” I look back at him. “Tristan I...it’s really not something I want to...” I sigh heavily. “I’m not even sure if I will ever tell you, I just don’t know.” I add.
“I wish you would, was it your Dad? Did he beat you’ – “Stop!” I place my finger over his lips. “I don’t want retribution, it happened and there’s nothing I can do about it except live my life to the fullest, the best way I can.”Tristan glares back at me.
“I mean it Tristan. This may sound strange to you but...” I take a deep breath, I’m not even sure if I want to tell him. Whenever I think of what happened to me, I think Karma, what goes around comes around. I’m pretty sure those people that did those things to me will get their comeuppance, someday.
“Tell me Coral, what are you thinking?” He asks running his fingers through my hair.
“Karma.” I whisper, staring straight ahead.
“Karma?”
“Uh-huh.” Tristan pulls on my chin so I have to turn and look at him.
“Karma, you believe in it?” I nod silently. Tristan stares blankly ahead. “What goes around comes around,” he mumbles to himself, then turns his penetrating gaze on me. “What else do you believe in?” His face is unreadable so I decide to go on.
“Spirit, the universe, that we are all connected.” I whisper feeling silly for sharing my beliefs with him - I’ve never shared them with anyone.
“I like that.” He says brushing his thumb across my bottom lip. “Can you teach me?” he asks.
“Um...well, I can give you books to read. I think you have to come to your own conclusion about what it all means to you.” I answer feeling as though I’m blushing.
Tristan smiles his deep dimpled smile. “I’d like that.” He takes my hand in his and kisses it. And I don’t know why, but I feel as though I want a really long hug.
“Will you do something for me?” I whisper.
“Anything,” he answers in his husky voice.I put down my wine and stand up giving him my hand as I do, Tristan takes hold of it. I pull him to his feet, then fling my arms around him and squeeze him tight, my head resting against his beating heart.
“Is this what you want?” He asks sounding a little confused.
“Yes.” I whisper.
Tristan’s arms envelope me, and I sink into the peacefulness of the feeling. I feel safe, secure and so content. I wish I could stay like this forever, it feels so wonderful. I notice the music is still playing in the background and that it has flipped onto the next album. Dionne Warwick’s This Girl’s In Love With You is playing, it’s one of my old mixed tapes that I transferred to my player. It’s been years since I’ve listened to it.
“This is a favourite track of mine,” Tristan softly says. I look up at him. “Well the Herb Albert one, you know…the guy in love...” He smiles.
I nod, knowing the song.“Let me guess, your Grandpa?”
“Yep, big fan.”
“Yeah, Gladys likes Dionne, kind of gets you into it doesn’t it.”
“It does indeed.” Tristan pulls away from me and I am momentarily gutted, until he holds out his hands to me.“Dance with me?” He asks.
“Here?” I question, blinking up at him.
“Yes.” He has his hands held out waiting for me.
“What old style?” I squeak.
“Yes.” His face is dead serious.
“I-I…don’t know how to do that.” I whisper.
“I’ll show you.” He says. Tristan takes my left hand and places it on his right shoulder, then wrapping his right arm around my waist, he pulls me in so that our bodies are touching.He clutches my right hand with his and places them against his chest. Then he gazes down at me, and starts to slowly move us around my tiny studio.Whoa!
Tristan moves with grace and such fluid movements, that it’s evident he’s done this before, and does it very, very well.
“You’ve done this before.” I say dreamily.
“Yes,” he croaks huskily. “My Grandparents went to a dancing club every Wednesday and Saturday evening, I went along with them.”
“Oh that explains it,” I answer as Tristan twirls us around some more. “Why do you think people stopped dancing like this? It’s really nice.”
“I don’t know. Maybe the music changed, so it changed people styles.”
“I like the old way, men taking women out dancing, I bet it used to be really fun.”
“It was also a great way for men to check out the women they were dancing with,” Tristan adds.
“How?” I question.
“Well....you know,” Tristan smiles shyly. “My Gramps told me it was a way of checking out a woman’s figure,” he grins cheekily.
“Ah,” the penny drops. “I suppose it was. And if I were in a dress like back then, what would you be surmising right now?” I tease flirtatiously.
“I’d be thinking I was the luckiest man on the planet, and I’d be thinking of all different ways to impress you, so you would say yes to another date.” His dimples go to full wattage as we grin widely at one another.
“Good answer.” I say.
“It was, wasn’t it,” he says, his cheeky grin appearing.
I shake my head at that one. The next song comes on, Ray Charles - You don’t know me. It’s one of my all time favourites.Tristan stops moving and stares down at me, his expression intense.
“How is it that all the songs I like, you have?” He asks moving us around again.
“You know this one?” I ask incredulously.
“Ray Charles is one of my favourite singers,” he tells me.
“And this song?”
“It’s what I heard playing in my head when you came walking into reception, then all through the meeting, and when I drove back to the hotel.” I gasp in awe.
“You did?” Tristan nods solemnly at me.
“Tristan,” I whisper placing my head under his chin. “Don’t ever leave me,” I whisper so quietly I’m not even sure he heard me. I close my eyes to my own words, feeling the power of them and the enormous effect Tristan has over me.
“Not a chance in hell,” he whispers back. So he heard me!
I open my eyes again and stare up at this amazing man that has entered my life like a whirlwind. A powerfully profound urge to kiss him overtakes me again. I lean up onto my tip-toes, entwine my fingers through his hair and lean into him.
Tristan leans forward, and his lips finally reach mine. He kisses
me gently, carefully, and his lips are just as soft as I imagined they would be, but something is happening to me, I feel like I’m on fire.
Desire explodes inside me, desire for this amazing man.
Tristan has ignited a flame that is now burning so intensely, that I don’t think about my actions, all rational thoughts have disappeared.
I jump up and wrap my legs around him, forcing his lips apart so I can taste his tongue, kissing him with all the passion and fire that’s been burning up inside of me. Our lips mesh together in perfect symmetry, as our tongues lash against one another in heated passion. Tristan moans a deep sound of longing, which makes me whimper out loud, I want him so badly, but I know I need to be careful, I don’t want him to think the obvious is going to happen.
As we continue to kiss with heated passion, our tongues lashing and probing against one another, my nose suddenly starts throbbing angrily at me. I think I must have bumped it as I got lost in the moment.
“Ow! ow...ow!!” I moan and gently slide down his body, his hands gently gripping me, keeping me balanced. I reach my hand up to my nose to try and protect it, but I can't see as my eyes have filled with watery tears – God damn it!
“Oh baby.” Tristan wipes the tears away that are rolling down my cheeks.
“Sorry.” I whisper keeping my eyes closed so I can try and concentrate on pushing away the pain.
“Don’t be, come, sit down Coral.” He gently ushers me to the sofa, I carefully sit down. I hear Tristan walk away,then I hear the tap running, within a moment he is back.
“Open your eyes baby,” he says softly.As I do, I notice him crouched in front of me with a folded tea-towel in his hands.“Here,” he places the cold towel gently across my nose. “Keep it there I’ll get you some Nurofen.”
As I watch Tristan walk away, I notice he’s trying to hide his erection – I try not to chuckle.
“What’s funny?” He says as he re-appears in front of me with the tablets and a glass of water.
“Nothing,” I say trying my best to hide my smile.Downing the tablets with the water, I lean back on the cushion, close my eyes and wait for the throbbing to settle down. “I think I caught my nose there,” I tell him.
Darkest Fears Trilogy: Fallen For Him / Freed By Him / Forever With Him Page 36