The words to this song, and Tristan singing them to me are exactly what I need to hear. Because the world does make me feel crazy sometimes, and I'm pretty sure there are times when I have really sad eyes and I know, I know Tristan will always be there for me, and that he loves me just the way I am.
“She would never dance with me,” he says as Phil moves onto Groovy Kind of Love, yet another classic.
“Olivia?” I whisper as we continue to slowly dance.
Tristan nods solemnly at me, carefully lifts his hand and twirls me around.
“Why? You’re a wonderful dancer?” I say, frowning up at him.
“She um...well, how can I put it? She was cold Coral, an ice-block compared to you.” He softly says.
I raise my eyebrows surprised by his words, his honesty. “She...she was cold?” I squeak, but seeing her today and after what Edith told me, I have to agree with him.
“I never realised it,” he says, his eyes boring into mine. “My Gran never liked her that much, said that she was just after a man with money and status, but I was blinded by her, looking through rose coloured spectacles. I thought that what we had was love, but she never did anything for me, certainly nothing sweet like you’ve done my darling.”
“Me?” I breathe.
Tristan nods again. “The painting of the Jag, the photos of my folks, cooking a nice meal for me. Do you realise how much that meant to me?” He asks, he’s intense again.
I smile up at him. “I guess I do now,” I say. I must do more things like that for him! – Then I frown up at him.“Are you saying she never like...you know, cooked you a nice dinner for when you got home from work or’ – “She never did anything like that Coral, she was spoilt and expected everything to be done for her, but like I said, I wasn’t seeing clearly, and she was selfish. I thought what we had was a strong, a deep connection; but it pales in significance compared to the connection we have. I don't think you realise how good you make me feel. I have never counted the notches on my bedpost, but I have had more partners than you, and I’ll tell you now baby, you make me feel like none of the others did. You make me so happy.” Whoa!
I swallow hard and smile up at him.
Tristan continues.“When I went back to London after meeting you for the first time, I couldn’t stop thinking about you, and every time I did, I couldn’t wipe the grin of my face – I think Edith thought my face was going to split in two.” He smiles as if he’s remembering back then.
“Oh.” I swallow hard again. What a declaration!
His broody look appears. “Don't ever change,” he whispers, then leans down and softly kisses me, his tongue gently lapping against mine – I want him, now!
“Coral?” I hear Debs shout in a croaky voice.
I sigh inwardly. “I better go to her,” I whisper against his lips.
“Yes, let’s go see your sister,” he says, releasing me and switching of his player and the speaker.
“Don't say I told you about’ – “I won't mention a thing,” he interrupts. “But you should already know that.” Trust Coral, trust him!
“I'm sorry,” I whisper. “I trust you Tristan,” I add.
“You’re getting there.” He smiles warmly at me, leans down and quickly kisses me before taking my hand and leading me out of the library.
“Debs,” I say, pulling her into me. “You ok?” I ask.
“My head feels like it’s being crushed in a vice,” she says, swaying a little.
“We’re going home Coral.” Scott pipes up.
“Are you sure? Don't you want to eat something first?” I ask.
“I want to go home,” Debs whimpers. “I want my bed.”
“Ok.” I can't help giggling at her face, she looks so sorry for herself. Scott pulls his keys out of his pocket and reaches his hand out to Tristan. “Thanks all the same, maybe we can stay over some other time?”
“We’d love that,” Tristan says shaking his hand then releasing it. “Here, let me get the door for you,” he adds as Scott and Stuart shuffle Debs towards it, trying to keep her upright.
“Are you sure you’ll be ok getting her in the house?” I ask Scott as they sit Debs in his car.
“Yeah...I’ve seen her in worse states,” he says, smiling broadly.
I smile back at him; he’s right I’ve seen Debs worse than this.I lean inside the car and kiss Debs on the cheek. “Make sure you eat, please?”
“Yes Mom!” She answers dryly. I chuckle at her and shut the door, then I turn to Scott and reluctantly hug him.
“You ever do that to my sister again and I will have your balls on a platter,” I whisper, then I pull out of the hug and glare up at him.
He quickly clears his throat. “Um...yes. I'm sure you will,” he says not knowing where to look.
I nod once and walk over to Tristan, we watch Scott get in the car, and I wave to them both as Scott drives steadily out of the driveway.As soon as we are back in the house, Tristan double locks the door, and presses the button for the gates. I watch him, mesmerised again as he waits for the gates to close.
“So,” he says turning to smile at me. “It’s been quite a day,” he says pulling me into his arms.
“That’s putting it mildly,” I answer dryly, resting my chin on his chest so I can look up at him.
“Nurse Terry will be here soon. Let’s eat and then we can get you to bed,” he says, his eyebrows pinched.
“Bed?” I question.
Tristan traces his fingertip under my one eye. “You look exhausted,” he says, his worried look is back. And now he’s said that, it makes me realise how tired I do feel.
“You’re right,” I yawn. “I am.”
“Just as I thought,” he says, taking my hand and leading me over to the kitchen table.
“Oh!” I suddenly remember his presents. “Baby, come with me please,” I say, taking his hand and pulling him to his feet.
Tristan looks completely mystified. I lead us into the library, shut the door and take him over to one of the recliners.
“Sit please,” I ask nicely. Tristan gazes quizzically at me for a moment then gracefully sits.“Now, you know how this works as we’ve done this before’ – “Coral, no. You’re exhausted, please baby let’s just eat and go to bed.” He says with worried eyes. I can't help chuckling at him. Sex? Tristan thinks I want to have sex? – Well, I do but...“Tristan, this isn’t about sex, so please just close your eyes,” I giggle.
“Oh...ok.” Reluctantly, he closes his eyes, but I notice his hands subconsciously move towards his groin. Protecting himself, or stopping me, I'm not sure? Either way it makes me laugh again.
I pick up his big bag that I hid behind the sofa and carefully place it in his lap.
“Open sesame,” I tease.
His eyes dart open. “What’s this?”
“A gift,” I smile.
“You bought me a present?” he says, his eyebrows pinched together.
“Two,” I whisper, smiling and widening my eyes.His eyes narrow.“Don't you want it?” I squeak.
“Of course I do baby, I just...” He trails off, staring down at the gift.
“Tristan, are you purposely trying to wound me?” I huff.
“No, of course not,” he sighs.
“For the love of God Tristan, will you just please accept these presents graciously, and accept that if I want to buy you a present, I will buy you a present, whenever I want, no matter what time of year!” I say my hands on my hips, my mouth pressed into a hard line.
“Point taken, thank you baby,” he says looking a little guilty.
Now I feel guilty.“Tristan,” I place my hand over his to stop him from opening the bag. “You’ve been amazing with me, really sweet, so attentive and I...I just wanted you to know how much I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. And I know what you’re going to say, that I don't need to thank you, that it’s what you do, what you want to do for me, but this,” I point at the bag. “This is my way of telling you that I a
ppreciate it and that I love you.” I lean in and quickly peck his lips. “Will you do something for me though?”
“Anything.” He breathes, staring up at me with big, wide eyes.
“Open the card first?”
“I have a card?” He beams.
“Uh-huh.” Tristan opens the bag, pulls out the big white envelope and opens it up. He reads the front, swallows hard then opens it up. I wait, impatiently while he reads the verse.
“Tristan this is true. The money, the house, the cars, the gifts, they don't mean anything without you. Your loving fiancé, Coral.” Jeez, I didn’t know he was going to read it out loud.
“Come here baby.” He puts the bag to the side and pulls me onto his lap. “You see what I mean. Olivia would never have done something like that for me. I mean, sure she’d buy me a birthday and Christmas present, but that was it, nothing else, and she was loaded. You don't have any money – well you do now – yet, you’ve done this, for me?”
I nod and smile shyly at him. “I just want you to know I love, admire, and appreciate you, and I'm grateful you’re in my life Tristan.”
“I'm grateful for you too baby.” He softly says.
“Even though we fight?” I tease.
“Even more so when we fight.” He grins.
“Me too,” I giggle. “Well come on then, open them up. I'm dying to see your face...Oh, it’s not expensive...nothing radical...I just’ – His lips silence me.
“I know whatever it is, I'm going to love it,” he murmurs against my lips. I beam at him, he grins back for a second then dives in the bag.He pulls the dvd out first, thank god, I'm not sure if men even like teddy bears. Ripping the paper of, he stares down at the cover.
“Phil Collins, Finally, the first farewell tour?” He swallows hard.
“Ah crap! You’ve already got it haven’t you?”It’s very hard buying something for someone who’s rich.
“No,” he whispers, still staring down at it.
“Really?” I beam, feeling triumphant. “You do like it, don't you? You said you never had anyone to go to his concert with, so I thought I’d bring the concert to you?”
Without a word, he places the dvd on the table next to him and pulls me gently down to meet his lips and kisses me, slowly, enticingly, then stops and leans me back so he’s gazing down at me.
“You really are the most beautiful soul I have ever met Coral Stevens. I swear to you, I'm going to do everything within my power to make you happy baby, everyday, for the rest of my life.”
“Oh Tristan, me too,” I whisper, reaching out to stroke his stubbly beard. “So you like it?” I giggle.
Tristan shakes his head at me and laughs. “That’s a ludicrous thing to ask,” he says, grinning from ear to ear. “I love it. Thank you baby,” he finally says.
“You are more than welcome,” I tease.
“Shall I open the next one?” He says. I frown, feeling a little uneasy. “What?” He questions.
“I just...I don't know if men like that kind of thing, so don't worry if you don't...or if you think it’s really girly...” I stop and titter at the look on Tristan’s face. “Just open it,” I say, rolling my eyes.He picks it up, pulls of the paper and reads the teddy bears logo on the heart.
“Now that is cute baby, you picked this for me?”
“Yeah...I just saw it and thought of you. Too girlie?”
“No, totally sweet and adorable, and I love you this much too,” he says, grinning from ear to ear. “Thank you,” he adds, pulling me into him and holding me tight.
Then totally spoiling the moment, I involuntarily yawn.“Sorry,” I whisper, smiling up at him.
“Thank you baby, you spoil me. But you’re tired, so come on, up you get, let’s eat and get you to bed.”Tristan lifts me off his lap, takes my hand and we head out the library and back over to the kitchen table.
Edith comes over to us, looking very guilty.“Tristan, I am so sorry’ – “Edith, it wasn’t your fault, don't feel guilty. Olivia shouldn’t have done that.” He tells her firmly.
She smiles down at me, pats Tristan on the shoulder then heads back into the kitchen. Moments later she re-appears with two plates of poached salmon salad, with new potatoes. As she place them down, I realise how famished I am.
“Thank you,” Tristan says as I smile up at her.
“Well, Stuart ate out while you had your round of golf, so he’s retired for the evening,” she says. “Can I get you anything else?” She asks.
“Coral?” Tristan asks. I shake my head as I'm already eating. “No thanks Edith, we’re good.”The intercom buzzes for the gates.“That’ll be Nurse Terry,” Tristan says, rising to let her in.
“Let me,” Edith says and wobbles over to the door. I listen as she asks who it is, then buzzes Nurse Terry in. Moments later, Edith opens the front door and Nurse Terry heads straight over to us.
“Oh, you’re eating, I'm sorry to disturb you,” she says.
“No worries,” I say giving her my right hand.
“You look tired,” she says. “I think bed rest tomorrow.”
“I agree,” Tristan says. I frown at them both. “Rob can come here,” Tristan adds in a tone that’s not to be argued with. “Don't worry, I’ll disappear.”
My face pales hearing him say that, I swallow hard. “Don't say that,” I whisper, trying to admonish him, but coming off sounding frightened.
“Hey.” He reaches out and takes my free hand, squeezing it gently.
“All done Coral,” Terry says. “And I do mean it,” she says looking at both of us. “Bed rest tomorrow or I’ll have no choice but to tell Dr Green, and I know you don't want that,” she adds looking down at me.
I nod, reluctantly.“Good, see you tomorrow.” Edith follows her to the door and waits a couple of minutes, then she presses the button to shut the gates. Reaching us, she bids us both goodnight and heads up the stairs. We both tuck into our meals.
“I guess I better text Rob,” I mumble. Then I remember – Shit! “I have George and Cindy tomorrow!” I say in a panic.
“I’ll call George,” Tristan says.
“I don't want to let him down,” I say, feeling guilty.
“He won't mind a bit Coral, he’ll understand. You are still healing darling.”
“What about Cindy? I still need to pay her for her time,” I say sounding a little frantic.
Tristan snorts. “Of all the things to worry about Coral,” he says, shaking his head. “Do you really think you need to worry about that? About money?”
“No, I guess not,” I mumble. “I just hate letting people down.”
“I know,” he whispers, reaching up to stroke my cheek. “That’s one of the many things I love about you.” Oh...I have missed him today...
“I missed you today,” I whisper, yawning again.
“I missed you too baby, that’s why I came home early.”
“It’s a good job that you did,” I say.
“Yes it was, wasn’t it – well done by the way,” he adds, sounding proud.
“For what?” I squeak.
“Not drinking.” Huh?
I frown at him not understanding.
“Coral, I think you know this yourself...or maybe you don't, but sometimes you use alcohol as a coping mechanism, things get too rough and you reach for a drink. Yet, after all you’ve been through today, speaking to your father and finding out what he’d done, Justin, Debbie and then Olivia turning up, you haven’t touched a drop. I am very proud of you for that.”
“I'm not an alcoholic Tristan.” I snap.
“I never said you were.” He retorts.
I frown down at my half eaten plate of food, my appetite has vanished again. I sigh inwardly. He didn’t mean it like that, I know he didn’t – I guess I'm more tired and cranky than I realised.
Tristan has his forearm resting on the table, so l lean down and rest my head on it, facing away from him, and softly stroke his hand.
“I'm sorry. I'm bein
g tired and grumpy. I know you didn’t mean it like that, and you’re right, I do use it to help me cope. When Debs told me about Scott and I panicked about us, about you, I really wanted a hit, but I didn’t. I know it’s not wise to do at the moment, but now I'm really, really glad I didn’t because I don't think I would have handled Olivia turning up like that.”
Tristan softly strokes my hair. “Baby, please finish your meal.”
“I think I'm too tired Tristan, besides I’ve lost my appetite.”
“Oh!” I feel him kiss my hair. “Because so much has happened today?”
“I guess,” I mumble, sitting back up because that was not comfortable. My shoulder hurts, my lungs feel like there on fire, hell my whole body hurts. I feel like I did when I first came out of hospital.“I think I need to go to bed now,” I say, my eyes involuntarily closing on me.
I manage to get to my feet,and I'm about to kiss Tristan goodnight, but he quickly stands and lifts me up into his arms.
“Tristan,” I mumble, trying to tell him off. “Stay, finish your dinner.”
He kisses my hair and grips me closer to his body. “I will, but I'm putting you to bed first, my sweet girl.”
“Oh...ok,” I whisper, my head lolling against his shoulder. And as hard as I try to fight it, sleep finally takes me, and I drift off in Tristan’s arms...
CHAPTER NINETEEN
I AM HAVING ANOTHER NIGHTMARE FROM WHICH I CANNOT WAKE. Olivia is in the house, stalking us. Its night time and all the lights are off, I can see the sky outside is black. And it’s like I'm her, and I'm seeing things from her perspective – through her eyes – just like the time I dreamt of Susannah.
Olivia sneaks up the stairs, creeps past Stuart and Edith’s bedrooms, and slowly walks up the last flight of stairs. Reaching our bedroom door, she carefully twists the door handle and gently pushes it open. She walks forward, into our bedroom, and stares down at Tristan and I sleeping, wrapped up in each other’s arms.
Get out! I screech at myself, or her – It’s so confusing!
Then the dream suddenly shifts. I'm in the green forest and I'm looking down at the newborn baby in the hole, only he’s not moving this time, he’s not looking up at me. And I’m choked with horror -No!
Darkest Fears Trilogy: Fallen For Him / Freed By Him / Forever With Him Page 117