Deep in the Heart
Page 25
She turned her back toward me, and I swallowed the groan working its way through my gut, up my chest. The skirt slithered over her hips, cupping her ass. I wanted my hands there, fingers digging into the supple flesh, as I pounded into her body. And forget…
Whoa. Not going there. Especially twice in under five minutes.
Thankfully, she spoke, breaking my near-trance.
“I’m going to have to pass,” she said over her shoulder.
I crowded her a little. Her pupils dilated and her delicate nostrils flared. I lifted my hands, prepared to run my palms down her bare arms.
She walked back in clear dismissal.
“There’s one thing you didn’t ask me,” she snapped.
I dropped my hands. “Fine. I’ll bite. What’s that?”
“If I was interested in a one-night stand.”
“Who doesn’t like pleasure?” I growled. She was as into me down at the bar as I was into her.
She cocked her head, all that long, luscious dark hair spilling across her neck and down her back. “You’re sexy. You’re charismatic. Unfortunately, your reasoning that I would fall into bed with you after having a fifteen-minute conversation is unacceptable.”
A live wire zipping up my spine wouldn’t have hurt anymore. “Unacceptable?”
She slid her purse strap back on her shoulder but continued to face me, her eyes filled with such disappointment—in me—that I looked down at the floor.
“You use sex. For pleasure. Nothing wrong with that, I guess, if both people are okay with it.” Her tone said there was a lot wrong with my choices. She stepped in closer, her rich voice caressing my skin, causing a ripple over my flesh. “But, see, I’m not okay with that.”
My chest ached at the weary sadness that filtered into her eyes.
“Did someone…” I didn’t know how to ask—what I wanted to ask—but it was evident from her bleak expression that she’d seen sex used as a weapon. That realization made my heart stutter.
She brushed off my question with a flip of her hair. That silky, shiny hair I really wanted to pet. Not in a sexual way, not now. I just…shit. I wanted to hold her close and tell her everything would be okay.
We both knew that was a lie.
“You want to do intimate things to my body without understanding my mind, my feelings.”
“What does sex have to do with feelings?” I asked, my voice harsh because these emotions she’d churned up inside me hurt.
Her expression held no amusement. What had happened to her?
“For many men and women, but most importantly, for me, everything.”
“You’re saying you’ve never fucked for the sake of the release?” I asked. No, I couldn’t have heard her response right.
“I don’t fuck.” Her voice was as flat as her expression.
The word fell, hard and ugly between us. I shivered. When she said it, it sounded…well, bad. Everything about this evening had taken a nose-dive into unfamiliar and painful territory. I didn’t know how to respond.
“I’ll take you home.”
She pursed her plump lips. “No.”
“No?” I asked. I was so out of my depth.
“No. Me coming here was insanity.” Her delicate throat convulsed and her eyes filled with tears that she ruthlessly blinked back.
She was ripping my heart out. Bringing her here had been an epic mistake.
“I have one very simple rule.” Her voice broke but she kept her gaze locked on mine and her back straighter than a flagpole. “You don’t get in here without getting in here first.” She tapped her chest, then her temple.
Her words settled against my skin like acid rain.
“You expect me to…what? Love you? I don’t even know you.”
And this time she didn’t even smile. Her gaze remained steady, true as I met it.
“Exactly.”
Her next words, spoken in that rich voice that wrapped around me like a mug of hot chocolate, stopped both my heart and my desire to comfort her.
“I don’t think you can love a woman.”
With effort, I managed not to stagger. My body turned stiff as I shut each emotion down. She was right—I didn’t. Well, not the kind of relationship she meant. I mean, I loved my mama and my sister, but not wanting emotional entanglements with other women? That was a choice. One I’d made because… I shook my head, trying to force the memories from my mind.
She turned on her cowboy boots and walked to the door. Hand on the knob, she glanced back at me. The light set her hair aglow.
“Good luck with the seducing.”
Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed this excerpt. Want to preorder? Please click here for current available links.
Also by Alexa Padgett
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