Oklahoma Sky

by Jillian Neal

  She popped the SD card out of her camera and pushed it into the computer. She wanted to see the pictures she'd taken of the brand new calves. An email alert popped up on her screen as she opened Photoshop.

  Her heart thundered in her chest, and her throat went oddly dry. It was from Nina Morales's assistant. Callie shut the laptop. If she didn't read it, she wouldn't ever have to know what it said. She couldn't quite decide if she wanted to be rejected from the internship, which would be a pretty clear sign that maybe she should stay in Holder County and see what became of her and Ford, or if she wanted to be accepted which would prove that her photography didn't suck. Would that be a sign for leaving?

  Her stomach soured at that thought. Was that a sign unto itself? She didn't know. Ugh. Why couldn't the universe send text messages about what she was supposed to do or something? That would be much more clear.

  With shaking hands, she opened the screen once again. "You asked for a sign," she sighed out. Clicking on the email, relief immediately swept through her. It was only a request for the second portion of her portfolio. Apparently, Nina had liked the first set of images she'd sent. Okay, so maybe the universe just wasn't certain yet. It needed some more time to think. That was okay by her. More time with Ford was all she really wanted anyway. It wouldn't be all that odd for her to take several more days, heck maybe even a few weeks, to send more photos.

  She shut down the email and went back to the calves. They were the cutest things she'd ever seen, and she loved watching their mamas bathe them and nurse them instinctively. Too bad human mamas didn't always know what their babies needed.

  "Where's Callie this afternoon?" Uncle Gentry asked Ford as they checked the babes to make sure they were taking to nursing.

  "Back at the house. I think she's working on the pictures she took this morning. I want her to get good and comfortable at my place, and I knew I wouldn't be out here long."

  Gentry smiled at him. "I couldn't be happier for you, kiddo. I wish Maddox would find somebody that'd keep him settled the way you seem to be the last few days."

  "He did, didn't he?" Ford reminded. "But he got scared and ran her off."

  "Yeah, well, he's got more balls than brains. Always has. It's a dangerous combo."

  Ford couldn't have said it better himself. "Are people talking about me taking up with Callie so soon after the divorce?" The question had been brewing in his head for too long for him not to ask someone.

  "Would it bother you if they were?"

  "I don't know yet. Maybe. I guess it depends on what they're saying."

  "Cows are gonna shit. People are gonna talk. Most of it's worth about the same."

  Ford chuckled. "That's God's honest truth, but I know this whole thing has to come off as...unusual."

  Gentry shook his head at his nephew. "I 'spect what's got you worried is that the people saying it all happened too soon, or a dozen other things, might be right. But that ain't how things work. People have all of these ideas in their heads about how they think life oughta work. If they just follow all of their made-up rules, then nothing bad will happen. If you'll take a second and really think about it, you might notice that life dishes out good and bad with precious little regard to who followed the rules or not."

  Ford certainly couldn't argue with that. "Can I ask you something else?"

  "I wish you would. You always were my favorite nephew."

  "You say that to all of us," Ford reminded his uncle as they watched one of the calves take to his hooves and give bucking a try. They tried not to laugh at the poor fellow when he collapsed back in the grass.

  "Did you ever think that maybe whoever is about to ask my advice is my favorite at that moment?" Gentry teased.

  "How'd you know I was going to ask for your advice?"

  "Cattle ranchers don't much like having to ask for advice, so we do it real quiet like. You got quiet on me."

  Shrugging at that, Ford went on with his question. "If I never loved Meritt, how do I know if I'm in love with Callie? It can't be as simple as it feeling different than it ever did with Meritt."

  "How did Meritt make you feel when you spent time with her?"

  "Like I was chained to rumbling railroad tracks, but I couldn't quite see the locomotive heading my way just yet."

  "Apt description. And Callie?" Gentry grabbed a rag from his back pocket and mopped some fluid from one of the calf's heads that her mama had missed.

  "I don't know. I just kinda feel better whenever I'm with her. I...like the way she sees things. It's different, ya know? Kind of refreshing. Most of the time she makes me feel like I'm sixteen again."

  "Then you just answered your own question, didn't you? Everybody feels sixteen when they're falling in love. That's how it works. Even if you’re forty-two."

  "You think I'm too old for her? She's mighty young when it comes right down to it."

  "You got something against her being young?"

  "No. I just don't ever want her to resent me."

  "Ford, son, there ain't ever a time or a place for love. It always seems to happen on accident. You weren't out looking for her sitting in Rusty’s the day you signed them papers. God saw forth to put your ass on that barstool. You ever think maybe He's trying to make up for all the shit Meritt put you through?"

  "Maybe, but that doesn't answer my question about me being too old." Ford braced for impact. In his experience, his Uncle Gentry would always shoot straight with him and never cut the edges. That's why he wanted his uncle to answer the question.

  "It does, but you didn't listen. You don't get to decide. You don't get to change how old you are or how young she is. You just get to hang on and keep it good until the Lord calls you home. If it bothers people, let it bother 'em. Sometimes they need something to get all fired up about. Makes 'em feel better. Most of the time it ain't anything that means more than a hill of beans. Why don't you stop trying to figure out if you're breaking some kind of arbitrary rule and just fall in love with the girl? Stop trying to figure every single thing out and enjoy her."

  "I am enjoying her," he vowed. "Enjoying her probably too damn much." That morning alone he'd snuck back into bed after turning the horses out to enjoy her a second time.

  His uncle promptly doubled over laughing. "That ain't exactly what I meant, but good. Take it a day at a time. See what comes of it."

  "Jamie keeps saying she's got leaving in her blood 'cause of what her mama did, but I've met her daddy. I don't blame the woman for leaving."

  Gentry thought on that for a few minutes before he shook his head. "People don't leave because they've got something in their blood. They leave because there isn't anything left worth fighting for. When you walked in your house and found Meritt in bed with some shitlicker, that's when you threw her out. Your marriage had been over for years, but you had to see with your own eyes that there was nothing there to fight for. I 'spect her mama found herself in the same place after Callie was born. From the outside looking in, it seems she stuck around until Callie was up and toddling. She must've tried to fight for something with Abe. She was a whole lot younger than Callie at the time, too. Might be good to know if she was running to something or from it. No matter how flat you fry a pancake, it's always got two sides. Before you accept your brother's belief, it might do to hear Willow's side of the story."

  Ford couldn't have agreed more, but according to Callie she hadn't seen or talked to her mama in almost ten years. "I'd be happy to hear her side of it, but she left Callie, too. Right after she graduated from high school and took a job at one of those mall photographers."

  "Now, that I don't hold with, but there still has to be a reason. Plus, if anybody's got anything in their blood, your little brother has saving in his. He is a part-time firefighter after all. He's got a hero complex several counties wide. All of you boys do. He don't want to see you get hurt again. We can't mind that too much."

  Knowing he had no business searching out Willow Simpkin Monroe and knowing that Gentry was ri
ght about Jamie, Ford resigned himself to his worry. He couldn't just slap a ring on Callie's finger. He didn't want to tie her down. He wanted her to choose him, to choose Holder Ranch as her home.

  She occasionally still talked about that photographer out in New York. If that's what she really wanted, he'd never keep her from it, but it would kill him to watch her drive away. He moved on with his next order of business. "I told her I'd try to be old-fashioned about this, but that went out the window a while ago."

  "Do you really think people back in the day didn't like fucking as much as you all do now?"

  Ford cringed. "Do I want to continue this conversation with you? Because if you're about to start talking about you and Aunt Leigh, I'm going to cut you off now."

  Gentry shot him the customary Holder smirk. "I don't kiss and tell, boy. All I'm telling you is that there's nothing new about enjoying being with someone you love. Take it from a man who lived all of those good old days y'all talk about. The only thing good about 'em is that they're gone."

  Before his uncle could start in on feeding cattle by throwing hay bales out the back of a pickup in the snow instead of having a feed truck, or having to drive cattle all the way to the train station to ship them, Ford came out with the thing that bothered him most of all. "She wants a sign."

  "JD Metalworks in Tulsa runs that three for the price of two deal. I need a few new ones for the north side of the ranch. She wanting one with your names on it or something?"

  Ford couldn't help but chuckle. "Not that kind of sign. She wants something from the universe that tells her she's 'supposed to stay with me."

  "Humors me that you're standing there trying to figure out how to order the heavens around but also still wondering if you're really in love with her. I'll tell you this though—there is one problem with asking the universe to tell you what to do."

  "What's that?"

  "The way the universe tends to speak ain't in our native tongue."

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  "Oh my gosh, that's a lot of pickup trucks." It seemed every time Callie blinked, there were more parked out in front of Ford's parents’ home.

  "Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. The whole damn family wanted to meet you officially. You want some kind of safe word or something? If you say something like I want to go ride a horse, then I'll know you want me to get you the hell out of the fray."

  "I will eventually learn to ride a horse if you promise I won't land on the ground, and you'll teach me."

  Ford brushed a kiss on her cheek. "You don't have to learn to ride, baby. I was being serious. We need a safe word."

  "Those are for sex." Callie giggled.

  "Have I ever done anything in bed with you that you wanted to put a stop to? Because all you have to do is tell me to quit and I will."

  "Never, and I don't need any kind of safe word for this either." She eyed the trucks again. "I don't think."

  "They're all relatively harmless. Mama loves to cook, and she wants to get to know you better."

  "The biscuits she made yesterday were outstanding. Do you think she'd teach me how cook like that?"

  "Trust me, nothing would make her happier." He opened the truck door. "Let's get this over with."

  Half of Callie was excited. The other half was mildly terrified. She'd never be able to remember all of their names. What if they didn't like her?

  She stayed tucked close to Ford as he opened the screen door.

  "Knock the shit off'a your boots before you come in my kitchen," Sara Holder called.

  "I swear that's been her battle cry since I was four." Ford took care to wipe his relatively clean boots off outside.

  Callie nodded. "I can't really blame her."

  Ford introduced her to the two uncles she hadn't yet met, Wyn and Landon, and an aunt she didn't even know existed named Betsy. Then there was the slew of cousins and his baby sister. She tried her best to remember the cousins’ names, but knew it was hopeless.

  Thrill lit through her when she spied a collage of framed photographs up the stairwell that she'd missed when she'd been there before. "Is that you?" She pointed to a very young Ford missing both of his front teeth and holding up a blue ribbon.

  Ford squeezed his eyes shut and cringed. "Yeah, that's me."

  "Oh my gosh. You're adorable."

  "I wouldn't go that far."

  "What did you win the ribbon for?"

  "Calf roping at a ranch rodeo. I got lucky that year. Wyatt's the competition roper in the family." He gestured to another cousin who lifted his hat to Callie. “And Jace rides broncs in the PRCA.”

  She slowly climbed the stairs and studied every single photograph until one hit her like a brick in the face. A panicked Ford was standing outside the Holder County courthouse with a red head on his arm dressed in a white gown.

  Ford gripped the wedding photo in an effort to remove it from the display, but Callie caught his hand. "Don't," she whispered. "Try not to hate the things that turned you into the man you are."

  "Why?" he grunted.

  "Because I'm pretty sure I love the man you are."

  Astonishment shimmered in his eyes. "Does that mean...?" He wrapped her up in his arms. "I love you too, baby. So damn much."

  "Are we sure?" she couldn't help but ask.

  "I know I am. Are you still waiting on a sign?"

  "Not about loving you. I know I love you. I just need the universe to okay this, you know? Holder County is an awfully long way from New York." Callie wondered what more she needed to know. Maybe she really was a flighty as her mother.

  Ford was such a good man. He loved her, and she loved him. What more did she need? She kept those thoughts to herself. She just needed a sign. Surely something major would happen and then she'd be sure that she was right where she was supposed to be. Nina Morales would decline her application and portfolio, or some other thing would happen to let her know that in Ford's strong arms was right where she was meant to stay.

  Relief at the certainty that she knew what the future would hold washed over her. She just needed a sign.

  Ford positioned himself beside her at the table full of his cousins and a few of his siblings.

  Callie loved how protective he was of her, even though his family all seemed so great. They'd been nothing but welcoming, but she could feel the slight hesitation in the room surrounding her. Callie wondered if that's because she was somewhat of an outsider, or if they were worried she was going to hurt Ford. Wondering how to prove herself, she waited until everyone was seated and started eating to make sure she followed all of the manners her grandmother had instilled in her.

  Ford's mother joined them at the table, and Callie offered her a kind grin. "This all looks delicious, Mrs. Holder."

  "Thank you, honey. I didn't make half of it. That's the beauty of having such a big family. If everybody brings something, we have enough food for this ranch and the one next door. But eat up and tell me about the pictures you've been taking of the ranch. I'd love to see them."

  "Really?" Shock resonated through Callie's question.

  "Of course. Ford can't stop talking about how talented you are," Sara reassured her.

  Callie promptly turned ten different shades of pink. Ford loved her in every color. "It's just people don't really ask to see stuff that I took on my own. I mean, other than Ford, but I'd love to show them to you. I got some great shots of Ford taking care of the sick calf yesterday. You can see how worried he is and how much better the calf felt when he was there." The way she beamed up at him kind of made him want to see about getting fitted for some kind of superhero cape. Yeah, he could definitely get used to that.

  Jamie rolled his eyes. Their mother shot a glare at Jamie that had him trying to hide his next eye roll.

  Then she went on and soothed the moment as she always did. "Well, I may be a little biased, but I do happen to think all of my youngins are photogenic. Barrett and I tried to make the good-looking kind," she teased.

  Callie's laughter eased Ford's
momentary irritation with his brother.

  But Jamie studied her. "How long have you been a photographer?"

  "Pretty much ever since I could hold a camera. My grandfather gave me an old Polaroid when I was like five, and I've always wanted to have a camera in my hands since then. It's the only thing I've ever wanted to do. I sold my first image to my grandmother when I was eight. I spent all of the money on bubble gum, but it was the best gum I’d ever tasted." She wrinkled her nose and tucked closer to him. Ford found himself forgiving her nana for her judgmental comments. Callie just made him a better person. That was all there was to it.

  "Do you do weddings and stuff like that?" Meridian, one of the few Holder female cousins, asked in a kinder tone than Jamie's.

  "I've done lots of weddings, but I think I prefer more natural times in people's lives." A harsh swallow tensed her delicate neck, and she lowered her head. Ford set his fork on the side of his plate wondering what she was about to confess to his family. "My first formal training was with a photographer out in LA who specialized in maternity and boudoir shots. They're so sensual. I loved it. I love connecting women to their natural beauty. You don't have to be all made up in a wedding gown to be beautiful. It just feels more real, don't you think?" Then Callie's eyes widened with panic. "You don't have to answer that. I'm always asking weird things. Sorry."

  Meridian, a prosecuting attorney by trade, looked perplexed. "I make my living asking tough questions, so no apologies. I get what you're saying. It's more about the life than the day of the wedding kind of thing. That's a cool philosophy. What made you stop working with that photographer?"

  "She went out to the Serengeti to capture images of pregnancy and birth from her homeland. She lives in South Africa now. The images she posts online are breathtaking. Plus, she told me I was ready to go out on my own."

  Ford sat up and took notice at that declaration. "I agree with her."

  Callie shook her head. "I'm definitely not. You should see the shots Apio gets. I'm not even close to that good. I went back to pictures I hate taking after she left."