“Give me your eyes, Sarah,” he commanded. Not realizing I had closed them, I opened them back up. He picked up momentum and suddenly I was close. “You there again?” he asked.
“Yes,” I gasped.
“Good,” he whispered. Then he tilted his pelvis and gave it to me deep and hard. I moaned his name as I came and heard him growl mine in return. Hands down, I’d just had the best sex of my life.
He stared into my eyes and gave me a gentle peck on the lips. I was losing my heart to this guy in a big way.
“No more talk of Hunter anymore, okay?” he asked.
I was happy he asked instead of commanded this time. “Okay,” I agreed. I was never interested in Hunter, but I didn’t tell him that.
With a smile and another sweet kiss, he lifted himself off the bed. On the way to the bathroom, I heard his phone ring and I wondered who would call him this early in the morning. Then I realized it wasn’t any of my business. I wasn’t his girlfriend. I tried not to let this bother me, but deep down it did. His deep, husky, “Hello?” gave me goosebumps. I couldn’t make out the rest of the conversation, but a few minutes later, he returned dressed with a less than thrilled look on his face. Tossing me a towel, he said, “I’ve got to take care of something for work. You can stay if you’d like.”
His short tone got my full attention. “Do you want me to stay?” I asked.
“If you want,” he nonchalantly shrugged. I was speechless. I’d just had the most amazing sex of my life, and he was acting as if it meant nothing. His eyes roamed over my face and he sighed. “Trust me Sarah you do not want to get messed up with me.”
His words made my heart ache, and then I got mad. Motherfucker! I jumped off the bed and quickly pulled on my clothes. Once again, Cas was blowing me off. How many more times did he have to tell me he wasn’t interested before I finally got it?
Zero. I get it.
My eyes smarted and my sinuses filled. I was going to cry, but first I was going to say my peace, once and for all. “You know, you’re right, I don’t want to get messed up with you.” Anger sparked in his eyes, but I was too far gone to care. I pointed my finger at him. “You ruined this, not me.” My voice cracked with emotion. “From this point forward, you get no say in who I see or what I do because you are no longer a part of my life.” Before he could respond, I picked up my purse and walked out his bedroom door. As fast as I could, I scrambled down the stairs and out the front door. I cried all the way home.
Never again.”
* * *
“What has you in such a foul mood?” Max asked. We were sitting at the kitchen bar having our morning coffee. Since my encounter with Cas the weekend before, I had been out of sorts. I didn’t realize how transparent I was being, until Max brought it up.
“I miss Amanda,” I told him, which was true, but not what was really bothering me. What was bothering me was the fact I couldn’t stop thinking about Cas and my aching heart. I was so damn hurt.
“Just say the word and I can have you on the first plane to see her,” Max stated. God, I loved my brother. He could be a bully and an arse, but he was such a great guy.
“I might take you up on that,” I muttered, as my phone pinged with a text. I picked it up and read,
Sally: Any word from H, yet?
“Ugh,” I huffed and slapped my phone back on the counter.
Max’s eyebrow shot up in question. “Everything okay?”
Everything was not okay. Sally would not stop texting me about Hunter. I did not want Hunter. If Hunter wanted to go out with me, he would have asked by now. Since he hadn’t bothered to call all week I took it as a sign he wasn’t interested, which was just fine with me, as I had plenty on my mind. I was hurt by what Cas did. The look on his face as he moved inside me was seared on my brain. At the time, I would have sworn it was something close to love. Now, I knew different, and it hurt. What was the old saying? Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. What about the third time? If you let it happen a third time you are clearly a dumb arsed numpty. Thankfully, Ellie chose that second to walk in with a screaming Mac.
“What’s wrong, big guy?” I crooned.
“Big guy is cranky this morning,” Ellie unenthusiastically replied.
“He’s not the only one,” Max muttered.
Ellie’s eyes shifted to me and my phone rang. I grabbed it from the counter and looked to see who was calling. Isabella.
“Hello?”
“Sarah, it’s Isabella. I’m calling to see if you are free to babysit Amelia tonight?”
“Sure,” I responded. I’ll do just about anything to get Cas off my mind.
“Are you sure? I mean, it is a Saturday night and all. I completely understand if you have plans.” Isabella was such a sweetheart.
“What time do you need me?” I asked.
“How about six? I’m singing at Dragonfly and need to be there early to make sure everything it set up properly,” her voice cracked and I could tell she was upset.
“Are you okay?”
She paused for a second before responding, “Yes, I’m fine.”
Since my visit with Sally at Dillon’s apartment, Dillon had purchased a townhome and had recently moved Isabella, Amelia and Sally in to live with him. Isabella gave me directions to their new place. When she said the street name, my heart froze.
“Wait, did you say Sullivan Street?” I interrupted.
“Yes, why?”
I glanced over at Max and Ellie who were staring straight at me. “Just wanted to make sure I heard you correctly,” I answered.
As soon as we hung up, I texted Sally back and told her I hadn’t heard from Hunter, yet. Thankfully, she didn’t respond.
Dillon’s new townhome was right down the street from Cas’s place. As I passed by, I checked to see if his truck was there, but his garage door was closed.
Isabella was far from fine. She looked gorgeous as usual. However, I could tell she’d been crying. A few times I wanted to ask what was wrong, but decided it wasn’t my business. If she wanted me to know, she would tell me.
Amelia was a doll to sit for. I could see both Dillon and Ibby in her. Isabella didn’t get home that night until well after midnight, which put me home close to one in the morning. I didn’t fall asleep until somewhere around three and was dragging the next morning.
As soon as I hit the kitchen, I saw the note.
-S
Meeting with everyone at MMG. Come find us when you wake. The girls are making lunch for us. I expect to see you there.
-Max
After a much needed cup of coffee, I headed upstairs to shower and get ready. I thought about what I wanted to do with the rest of my life on the drive to MMG. Ellie had mentioned going to business school, but Max said I didn’t need a business degree to work for him. Did I want to work for my brother? Better yet, does he really want me to work for him?
Being that I had only been to MMG twice, one of which was at night when the place was dark, I didn’t have a clue where to go when I arrived. I followed the blaring sound of the song Kryptonite to an open bay door. The song reminded me of Max and Garrett in college and how they used to crank their music in Max’s room. Some things never change.
“Hello?” I shouted, as I entered the garage.
A kick ass Shelby Cobra was sitting on one of the lifts. Next to it was a very old, beat up looking Camaro. If there was one thing I knew, it was cars. Instead of bedtime stories, Max used to make me look at car magazines with him. I used to pretend I was asleep just so he’d take the magazine and leave. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I would rather watch paint dry. Tools and car parts were scattered about on the floor. If I worked here, I’d make them clean this mess up. Someone could get seriously hurt in here.
“Max?” I yelled over the music.
Where is everyone? I spotted a door on the other side of the garage and slowly made my way over to it. I pulled it open and headed down a long hall toward what appeared to be a
n entry way. I bet that’s the main entrance. I remember the kitchen being near the main entrance. As I passed by several closed doors, I heard muffled laughter from behind one of them. There they are. Twisting the knob, I opened the door, stepped inside and froze. There sat my brother and a room full of men, one of which was Cas. I let out a squeak of surprise.
“What’s up, Sarah?” Max asked.
“Ummmm,” I started to explain and Cas cut me off.
“This is a closed door meeting. Why the fuck do all the women around here think they can just walk in anytime they want?” His harsh tone stung.
Trying not to show how much his words hurt, I blurted the first thing I could think of, “I was told Ellie and Piper were here. This is where I happened to look first.”
“Do you see them here?” Cas snapped.
“Do you have to be a total arse all the time?” I shot back.
“Enough!” Max exclaimed. He shot Cas a dirty look and told me the girls were in the kitchen.
I had no clue where that was, but I didn’t want to linger any longer. I quietly thanked him and slipped from the room. I stood in the hall gathering up my wounded heart. Cas had been many things, but he had never been hateful to me. He looked at me as if I was nothing, as if he hadn’t been deep inside of me last weekend telling me how much he missed me.
No more.
Wiping the tears from my eyes, I straightened my spine and continued in the direction of the entry way and, hopefully, the kitchen.
* * *
As I was coming downstairs from putting Mac down for a nap a few days later, I overheard Ellie talking on the phone.
“Piper said Dillon left Isabella, not the other way around.” She paused for a second and then continued, “I know, right? He bought that place and isn’t even living in it. And get this,” Ellie continued, “Kurt told Max he busted Cas and Isabella in his office Saturday night. He saw Cas walk her to her car and, before she got in it, he kissed her.”
Oh my God! That was the night after he slept with me!
After a long pause, she added, “Bobby told us Cas couldn’t stay for lunch at MMG Sunday because of his lunch plans with Isabella and Amelia. Have you seen him with her? He’s a natural. I don’t know about you, but if I was Dillon, I would be worried.”
Feelings of hurt and shame washed over me. Never, in a million years, did I see this coming. Quietly, I bolted up the stairs to my bedroom, threw myself on the bed and sobbed.
No wonder he couldn’t be with me. He was waiting for her.
After a good long cry, I attempted to pull myself back together. I decided that men suck and I was taking a break from dating…or, at least, having sex, since Cas and I weren’t really dating.
* * *
Later that week, Max and Gage had to make an unexpected trip to Kentucky. Ellie and Joss decided this would be a perfect time for Piper’s bachelorette party. I warned Ellie that Max would be angry if he found out she was lying to him, but she scoffed and blew me off. At first I didn’t want to go. I hadn’t been out of the house all week and was uncomfortable about being around Isabella. Max confirmed Dillon and Isabella’s split, however, he didn’t mention her new boyfriend, Cas. I wanted to ask, but didn’t want to rouse his suspicions. I told Piper I was going to skip the party, but she insisted I go.
Being the only pregnant one in the group, Joss was assigned the duty of designated driver for the evening. Ellie knew something was up with me and kept asking if I was okay. The only excuse I could come up with was Aunt Flo was visiting. With a hug and a pat on the shoulder, I was excused for acting like a neurotic bitch. I loved my sister-in-law.
The first half of the evening went well. We started with a sit down dinner on the rooftop bar. Hunter and Zane introduced themselves and acted as if they’d never met me or Sally. This infuriated Sally, but I could have cared less. As far as I was concerned, Hunter and Cas could both take a flying leap off a very tall bridge.
The night took a nosedive when we entered the Dungeon. It started with Piper handing us a tray full of shots. I’d set aside my no liquor rule for the night, which was probably a bad idea, but oh well. The downward spiral continued when Isabella and Zane got busted dirty dancing by Dillon. At that point, I’d had a few shots and was starting to feel good. Isabella was sweet, but I decided she was a bit of a slut when she wiggled her ass all over Zane’s crotch. As Dillon, Zane and Piper escorted a very drunk Isabella out the door, I went on the search of Sally. The look on her face when she saw Isabella and Zane dirty dancing bothered me. Instead of Sally, though, I ran into Hunter.
Super.
“Hey babe. How are you?” he asked, kissing my cheek.
I came right out and asked him, “Did I do something to offend you?”
“Not at all. Why would you think that?” he asked.
“Let me see, maybe because you got my phone number and told me you wanted to go out with me, but never called,” I somewhat drunkenly stated.
He gave me a big smile. “It has been crazy busy around here, honey. I would have gotten around to it eventually.”
He did not just say that.
“Please tell me you are kidding?”
His mask of confidence slipped for a second and was replaced by one that reminded me of a caged dog. The last guy who looked at me this way was Hudson Malloch in high school…after Max and Garrett had gotten ahold of him. All of a sudden, it clicked.
No!
“Has Max been by lately?”
“Who?” he asked. His shifty eyes gave him away.
“Oh.My.God! I am so going to kill him!” I hissed.
As I turned to leave, he said, “Wait! It wasn’t Max. Cas Ashford and Bobby Preston paid me a visit last weekend. Cas told me you were Max’s sister. He also said you belonged to him.”
“What?” I squeaked.
“You are gorgeous and all, but…”
Before he could finish his sentence, I stalked away.
Bloody fucking Cas Ashford!
As I crossed the dance floor, I barely missed getting hit by a flying Ellie. Not in the mood to socialize, I headed straight for the table and the line of shot glasses. I was on my third one when the other girls joined me. I got two more down before Max and Gage showed up.
I was beginning to see the benefits of being single. Isabella could have Dillon, Cas or Zane. I was through!
All of mankind can go to hell!
Chapter Ten
Cas
‡
“You ruined it, not me. From this point forward, you get no say in who I see or what I do, because you are no longer a part of my life.”
Sarah’s parting words haunted me all week. I felt as if I was balancing on an emotional tightrope. One wrong move and I was going to fall off, and I had no idea where I would land. This scared the shit out of me.
She is better off without me.
A lot had gone down since Sarah’s middle of the night visit. The last time I saw her was at MMG two weeks ago, when I blasted her in front of the guys. That same morning, Alexandria called and told me she was thinking about signing herself out of rehab early. I’d spent an hour on the phone convincing her it was a bad idea. She only agreed to stay for the rest of the program after I threatened her with calling my lawyer. After the meeting at MMG, I was supposed to go to lunch with Isabella and Amelia and was feeling lukewarm about it. When Sarah popped into the room looking beautiful and acting as if she didn’t have a worry in the world, I snapped. I was an asshole and lashed out at her. Although I wanted to apologize, that would require tracking her down. Most likely we would end up having sex again, and I’d have to blow her off again. Not a good idea. I’d made a point of staying away, but never dreamed it would be so hard to do. I missed her.
Thank God work had been crazy busy. I was on Isabella and Amelia duty, while Dillon was trying to get a grip on a bunch of personal shit. Isabella’s ex-boyfriend Jimmy, meanwhile, had been threatening her. Garrett, Bobby and I had been worried he was going to pull s
omething without Dillon there to protect her. It turned out we were right. Jimmy, at least we suspect it was Jimmy, tried to run Isabella over outside Amelia’s doctor’s office. Shortly after, Dillon was jumped outside Dragonfly. He was now in the hospital recovering from a mild concussion and various other minor wounds. One of the guys who attacked him was stupid enough to tell him the hit was from Jimmy. Garrett and I put Bobby on it in hopes we could take Jimmy down. As we hoped, the South Carolina State Bar opened an investigation into Jimmy. If we could prove Jimmy had Dillon attacked, we could put him behind bars for good.
My mind drifted to Isabella. The woman had been through hell and back. She reminded me a lot of my little sister, which brought out my protective side. Her baby, Amelia, was such a doll. However, being around her was killing me. Memories of the night Kalen died haunted me and made me think about where my life would be if he had lived.
As instructed, Sterling’s jet was waiting for me on the tarmac. The fifty minute flight to Wilmington seemed much longer. All I could think about was my son, and how I hadn’t spent enough time with him. I was always making excuses to get out of the house and away from Xandria. I knew she had a problem with pills and alcohol, but as long as Vicky was there to watch Kalen, I didn’t care what she did.
If Kalen dies, it’s on me. I should have been there to protect him, not Vicky.
A car was waiting for me at the airport in Wilmington. It took us fifteen minutes to get to the hospital. One prayer repeatedly ran through my head on the way to the hospital; please let my son be alive.
As I entered the Emergency Room, I spotted my mother and sister. They both looked like hell.
Please let him be alive.
Bypassing the waiting room, I made a bee-line to the front desk. “I’m Kalen Ashford’s father,” I announced to the nurse behind the desk. She asked for ID and then told me to follow her. We went down a long hallway into a room with a crib. In the middle of it lay my son. Two days earlier I had said goodbye to a rambunctiously happy boy. What lay before me was a tiny, fragile child, who looked…broken. Tubes extended from his mouth, nose and arms. Monitors beeped in tandem. The room smelled of disinfectant.
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