Batter and Spells

by Zoe Arden

  "I have never had an affair with Mayor Thomas," Tazzie Singer said. "Or with anyone, other than my husband." She'd been brought in for questioning by Lincoln after he received a phone call from Sheriff Knoxx.

  Lincoln and Knoxx had decided to question Mayor Thomas and Tazzie separately, but in the same location. Since Mayor Thomas was already in a jail cell in Sweetland, they intended question them here. It was my good fortune that, just as Lincoln arrived with Tazzie, Tadpole sent a massive spray of perfume from one end of the sheriff's station to the other, literally filling the entire space with his scent.

  Eyes watered, noses ran, it was all we could do to get out of there before people started passing out.

  Sheriff Knoxx had no choice but to move the questioning to a new space. Our bakery was the perfect location, he decided, since no one was there right now. It sort of stung that Mystic was slow enough to use as an interrogation center, but it meant that I got to see what was going on. I might have been mistaken but I could swear that Tadpole winked at me as we exited the building. I had the feeling that Otis’ familiar was much cleverer than people gave him credit for.

  Mayor Thomas sat in the back room, saying the same thing that Tazzie had. "I've never even touched Tazzie Singer, let alone had an affair with her."

  "Explain this picture then," Lincoln said.

  Mayor Thomas couldn't. That was part of the problem. Neither he nor Tazzie could explain anything, only deny it.

  Trixie was sitting in a chair out front, spinning a cupcake around in a circle, bored, or maybe just frustrated. "It doesn't make sense," she said, frowning. "Why would they have an affair?"

  Eleanor looked at her younger sister with an expression I had often seen Colt use with me. "Why shouldn't they have had an affair? Sometimes people just do stupid things."

  "Yes, but the picture... what if it's fake?"

  "Fake?" I asked. "You mean like Photoshopped?"

  "Maybe. Or maybe just... I don't know. Sheriff Knoxx had a body double out there. Why shouldn't Tazzie and the mayor?"

  I scowled. "That's a good point, actually. How do we know the people in those photos are actually who they look like?"

  There was a knock on the front door of the bakery. Elwin opened it. "Sorry, Ma'am, the Mystic Cupcake is closed for the next hour."

  Elwin was nice, if not a little goofy. He was always smiling at inappropriate times. Otis had stayed back at the station, cleaning up after Tadpole, so Sheriff Knoxx had placed Elwin in charge. He was supposed to keep us out front, away from the interrogations, and keep customers from entering our store. So far, there had been no customers, and between the three of us, Eleanor, Trixie, and I had managed to hear everything that was going on back there.

  When Trixie decided she needed to make more strawberry frosting, she'd gone into the back for her supplies and heard Colt asking Mayor Thomas about the photograph. When I needed to work on my mood extracts, I'd gone in search of tanzanite powder and met a frustrated Colt who was attempting to get Tazzie to confess to the affair.

  Sheriff Knoxx had yelled at Elwin, telling him that if any of us went into the back one more time, he'd be in charge of Tadpole for the next week. I wasn't sure that Elwin saw it as the threat that Sheriff Knoxx had meant it as.

  "Thank you, Sheriff," Elwin said. "I sure do like that little guy, Tadpole's awful cute. I think he likes me, too, though not as much as he likes Otis, I know."

  Sheriff Knoxx had sighed and moved Tazzie into our frosting closet, which was essentially a large, walk-in pantry.

  Hadley Miner cleared her throat as she shoved her foot between the door so that Elwin couldn't close it on her.

  "I'm not here for pastries," Hadley said. "I've come to post Mayor Thomas’ bail."

  "Bail!" Elwin cried, his eyes widening. "Well, uh, I don't know, I mean, I'm not even sure if bail's been set yet." He smiled widely at her.

  "Well, I'm here either way, so you better find out."

  He ushered her inside and went to get Sheriff Knoxx. I watched her, wondering why on Earth Hadley would want to post bail for Mayor Thomas. I didn't even think she knew Mayor Thomas, not well enough to post his bail, that is.

  A moment later, Sheriff Knoxx appeared with Lincoln. Lincoln nodded to Hadley, who smiled back at him.

  "I understand you want to post bail for Mayor Thomas," Lincoln said. "Mind if I ask why?"

  "Why?" Hadley repeated, confused. "Because I think he's innocent and this is all my fault. I should have torn up that stupid picture as soon as I got it."

  "You sure that's it?" Sheriff Knoxx asked.

  "What do you mean? Why else should I want to post his bail?"

  Sheriff Knoxx shrugged and looked at Lincoln. "Well, you work for his mistress, don't you? Maybe you thought you'd be helping her if you got him out of here."

  "Mistress? You mean Tazzie?" Hadley suppressed a laugh. "You don't really believe that, do you?"

  "A picture's worth a thousand words," Sheriff Knoxx said.

  The back door swung open, and Colt poked his head out. "Sheriff Knoxx, Lincoln, you better get back here. I think we just got a confession."

  Lincoln and Sheriff Knoxx shot a surprised but happy look to each other as they hurried to the back.

  Elwin tried to follow but Knoxx told him to stay out here with Hadley. His face turned glum.

  "I never get to do the good stuff," he lamented to us.

  Trixie offered him a happy jalapeno cake, and when his attention was diverted, Eleanor, Trixie, and I crept to the door to listen.

  "Tell them what you just told me," Colt said.

  "I didn't kill anyone, it was Tazzie," Mayor Thomas cried. "She knew about the blackmail letters because I told her. It wasn't even the letters that bothered her so much, it was Thaddeus beating her in the polls. She already wanted him gone. The blackmail was just the icing on the cake. Tazzie wanted to get rid of him, and she found a way to do it."

  "You're saying that Tazzie Singer killed Thaddeus?" Sheriff Knoxx asked.

  "That's right."

  Tazzie's cry echoed shrilly from the frosting closet. "I did not!"

  Mayor Thomas ignored her. "She told me she was going to kill him."

  The frosting closet door opened. Tazzie stood with her hands on her hips. "I said I could kill him, not that I was going to."

  "What's the difference?" Mayor Thomas yelled.

  "The difference is you're trying to set me up!"

  "I don't have to set you up; you did just fine by yourself!"

  "I hate you! How anyone could think we were having an affair is beyond me!"

  "I couldn't agree more."

  "ENOUGH!" Sheriff Knoxx yelled. He turned to Colt. "Get her out of here, will you?"

  "Where to?"

  "Lincoln?" Sheriff Knoxx asked, looking at his counterpart.

  "Sure, we'll go to my station. Next time," he looked at Sheriff Knoxx, "you might want to leave your skunk outside."

  "It's not my skunk, it's Otis’." I could almost see the eye roll the mention of Tadpole induced in Sheriff Knoxx.

  When they were gone, Sheriff Knoxx turned back to Mayor Thomas. "Bottom line?" he asked the mayor.

  "Bottom line is that Tazzie Singer would stop at nothing to win the election. Including killing the man who beat her."

  * * *

  CHAPTER

  TWELVE

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  "Whistle if you see anyone coming," I said.

  "Whistle?" Lucy asked, laughing. "This isn't a film noir movie."

  "Just do it," I snapped. We were both on edge tonight. Lucy had had a rough day at work. Melbourne had come in for the first time since getting back to Sweetland Cove, and he and William Carney had gotten into an argument. Apparently, William didn't want to give up running Coffee Cove. He liked working there. He liked being in charge.

  William's point, which I thought was valid, was that Melbourne had been d
eclared dead for several weeks. Therefore, he had forfeited any ownership rights to the Coffee Cove. I felt bad for Melbourne, who was only trying to get his life back, but I wasn't sure it was fair to William to be forced out of the place.

  "What are we looking for, anyway?" Lucy asked, still huffy. "I thought this place was already searched."

  "It was." We were standing outside Mayor Thomas’ office. It was late, dark, and no one was around. It was the perfect time to do a little reconnaissance work. "The search got interrupted. Mayor Thomas made a run for it and when Hadley Miner showed up with that photograph, and the search was sort of forgotten."

  "Fine," Lucy said, "I'll help, but I'm coming in with you. I'm not standing out here like some yodel."

  "Fine," I snapped back. "Do what you want."

  I sighed as we snuck into the office. I wasn't sure whether it was everything that had happened that was setting me off, or if it was specifically Colt. I'd told him that I'd go to his father's sentencing with him and his mom, if he wanted, and he'd told me not to. He said he didn't want me there in case things went bad.

  Apparently, there were rumors that protestors were planning to hex the courthouse if Russell wasn't sentenced to their satisfaction. Colt didn't want me around in case that happened. All I heard, though, was that Colt didn't want me around. It just seemed like everything between us the last couple of weeks had been a big ball of stress.

  "I'm sorry," I told Lucy as we slipped inside. The doors to the office were surprisingly easy to jimmy open. It helped that Lucy had brought a magical crowbar.

  "Me, too," she sighed. We hugged briefly and tried to shake off our irritation at the world around us.

  I started with Mayor Thomas’ desk, since it seemed the most logical place to hide something.

  "So, you don't believe him when he says Tazzie killed Thaddeus, do you?" Lucy asked.

  "No," I said. "I know how it looks, but something about it doesn't feel right. I think Sheriff Knoxx and Lincoln agree with me, and that's why they haven't arrested her yet. Anyway, I'm learning to go with my instincts. It's part of being a witch, right?"

  There was nothing of interest in the desk. I moved to a closet. The mayor had an extra set of suits hanging in there. I searched the pockets and found a crumpled piece of paper.

  "What's this?" I asked, Lucy, unfolding it and showing it to her.

  She looked at it, her eyes narrowing. "I don't know. Looks like a phone number."

  I took another look.

  555 214 0000

  $10k more or else

  "A phone number, yes, but what's the rest of it? A threat?" I ran my hand absentmindedly through my hair. "You think I should call it?" I asked her.

  "I don't know." Lucy bit her lip, her brow furrowing deeper as she considered it.

  "I don't know what I'd even say if someone answered. But ten thousand more? That sounds like the assassin, don't you think?"

  "Give it here," Lucy said, reaching for the slip of paper. I handed it to her. She picked up the phone on Mayor Thomas’ desk and dialed the number, then pushed the button for speakerphone. We both hovered over it, listening to it ring. By the sixth ring, we were about to hang up.

  A voice suddenly answered.

  "Well, it's about time. Change your mind?" It was a scratchy, inhuman voice. I realized almost immediately that it was being run through some sort of voice altering software. It was neither man nor woman, child nor adult. It sounded like a possessed robot.

  I looked at Lucy, who shrugged.

  "Uh huh," I grunted, trying to sound nondescript. We were calling from the mayor's personal office phone. I didn't want to tip off whoever we were talking to that it wasn't actually the mayor.

  "Good. Thaddeus went down easier than I thought he would. I'm not sure that man ever removed a curse from anything in his life."

  The voice laughed, it was harsh and evil sounding.

  "Ugh," I grunted. Lucy suppressed a giggle. I slapped her shoulder.

  "The thing is, you took too long to answer me. I don't like waiting. If you still want me to take care of Tazzie, it's gonna be another fifteen now, not ten."

  "Fifteen thousand dollars?" I blurted.

  Now Lucy slapped me. I put my hand over my mouth. There was a moment of silence while we listened to each other breathe.

  "Who is this?" the voice demanded.

  I looked at Lucy, no idea what to do.

  "Who is this?" the voice demanded again, angrier this time.

  "Mayor Thomas." I said in a low, fake voice that didn't sound anything like the mayor.

  "I don't think so," said the robotic voice on the other end.

  I panicked and hung up.

  "We need to call Colt and Sheriff Knoxx," Lucy said, already pulling out her Witchmobile. "This number could clinch everything for us. It could lead to the real killer. Did you hear what they said? That Thaddeus went down easier than they'd thought he would. They must have killed him; it wasn't Tazzie or Mayor Thomas. Thaddeus Black was assassinated."

  "Call the sheriff's station," I said, "maybe they can meet us here."

  "Darn it," she said, banging her phone against her thigh. "This was just working. I lose my signal at the drop of a hat. I'll be right back."

  She hurried outside while I waited in the office for her. I started looking through the desk again. Maybe I'd missed something the first time. There was a creak behind me, followed by light footsteps.

  "Hey, Lucy, I was just thinking—"

  Something hit me hard over the head. My eyes closed, I fell to the ground, and everything went black.

  * * *

  CHAPTER

  THIRTEEN

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  I woke up in bed. My head was throbbing. Snowball blinked at me and licked my cheek.

  "Mama's awake!" she shouted gleefully. Trixie, Eleanor, Colt, and my dad came running into the room. They surrounded me like a prisoner caught escaping from jail.

  "There you are," Trixie said, as if I was missing.

  "What happened?" I asked. I had no idea how I'd gotten home.

  "What happened?" my father repeated. His face was a mask of worry lines and deep creases.

  Colt's face looked surprisingly similar.

  "What happened," Colt said, taking over for my father when he couldn't go on. They all looked mad, "is that you and Lucy decided to break into the mayor's office and nearly got yourself killed."

  "The phone number!" I yelled, jumping out of bed. I was still in the same clothes I'd worn yesterday.

  "Yeah, we know all about the number you and Lucy found," Eleanor said. "Too bad whoever knocked you over the head took it."

  "And there's no way to trace it," added Colt. "They enchanted the phone lines so that the number wouldn't register."

  "You can't trace it?" I squealed, disappointed.

  "I think you're missing the important part here, Ava," Colt said, easing the anger out of his voice and sitting gently on the edge of my bed. He kissed my hand, holding it tightly in his. "You and Lucy shouldn't be investigating these things on your own."

  "Did Lucy tell you about the phone call?" I asked. They were worrying way too much. I wasn't a child. I was fine. I'd just gotten a bump on my head is all.

  "Yes," they all said in unison. Eleanor and Trixie crowded in on me.

  Eleanor started talking, her hands on her hips. "I got a frantic call from Lucy last night—"

  "She wasn't making any sense," Trixie said, cutting her off. "She told us—"

  "That you were hurt and to bring Colt because—"

  "You knew who the killer was."

  Sometimes, listening to Trixie and Eleanor talk made my head dizzy. They had a way of finishing each other's sentences that was funny and irritating at the same time. I wondered if my mom was similar when she was alive. Maybe one day I'd ask them.

  "Only, of course, when we showed up," Colt said, "you were o
ut cold and the evidence was gone."

  "That doesn't make sense, though," I said. “How could the assassin get to me so fast? Even if they knew where I was, they'd have had to have been in the building. I mean, they were in the room with me literally two minutes after I hung up on them. Doesn't that strike anyone as odd?"

  Colt shrugged. "We're looking into it. Listen, for right now—"

  Lucy burst into my room just then. "Oh, my roses, you're awake."

  She yanked me out of bed so hard I almost fell over. Snowball bounced off my lap where she'd been sitting and shot her a look. "Get dressed," Lucy ordered.

  "Lucy," my dad said gingerly.

  "Mr. Fortune, Ava has got to go town square with me. You all should." She shot me a glance. "You're okay, right? Good." She turned back to the others while I hurried into the bathroom to change. "Mayor Thomas has officially lost his mind."

  "What are you talking about?" Colt asked.

  "Sweetland wants him out of office. They want to hold a recall election. Everyone's talking about it, so he set up a stage in the town square and is making a speech right now telling off the entire town!"

  "You're kidding!" Trixie exclaimed.

  "Nope."

  Everyone's interest seemed to peak at this news. After I was dressed, we followed Lucy to the town square and listened as Mayor Thomas spoke in an angry, rambling voice.

  "I am not a bad man," he said, banging his fist against the podium. "I am no killer." Bang bang! He must have enhanced the microphone with a bullhorn charm, because his voice was twice as loud as usual and every time he banged his fist, it sounded like the sky was falling.

  There were murmurs in the crowd. Some people cheered, most people jeered.

  "Power drunk!" someone shouted and there were murmurs of approval.

  "For witch's sake, I am not power drunk!" Mayor Thomas yelled. "Isn't there anyone in this town with half a brain anymore?! I am the SAME MAYOR I ALWAYS WAS!!!" He hit the podium so hard with his fist that a chunk of it broke off.