Shiftr: Swipe Left for Love

by Ariana Hawkes

  Ten hours later, Caleb walked back into the restaurant, his stomach growling with hunger and his bear fretting inside him. It was dying to go out for a run, but he couldn’t chance it, even though the daylight revealed that there were dense woods nearby that might be safe to run in. Until he arrived in Green Fields, his food was going to be provided by humans, and it was going to come cooked. This time, he picked a booth right by the windows. He ordered a stack of pancakes, three eggs and four slices of bacon. It should be enough to keep him going until he found some place to stop for lunch. The waitress brought him a strong black coffee and he settled into the plush seat cushions and flicked through a newspaper while he waited for his food.

  A couple of people sat down at the booth behind him, muttering to each other in short, staccato sentences. The waitress came up to take their order, and the guy dismissed her rudely.

  Caleb didn’t pay them any attention at first, trying to focus on the newspaper, but then he picked up a scent that he recognized. It’s the woman from last night. His heart skipped a beat. And then the man’s next sentence chilled the blood in his veins.

  “Don’t look at me like that,” he growled.

  “Like what?” the woman replied in a mellifluous, yet hesitant voice.

  “You know exactly what I mean. And don’t talk back to me,” the guy snapped.

  “Sorry,” she replied, even more hesitantly. Caleb clenched his jaw. Hearing her voice for the first time touched something deep inside him, but the way the guy was speaking to her made it almost impossible for him to control his bear. It yearned to leap over the back of the booth and seize the wolf by his scrawny throat.

  “I’ve told you already that it’s not going to happen. It’s been decided, and that’s all,” the guy hissed. The woman mumbled something that Caleb didn’t catch. “I’ve already made a big concession to you. What else do you want from me?”

  “Nothing,” she murmured. A hot wave of anger flashed over Caleb at the way she was forced to be so passive and conciliatory. His food arrived and the waitress took the couple’s order, and they were silent for a while. He ate quickly, ears pricked up the whole time, but they both seemed to be looking at their phones, swiping and tapping. Every so often the guy muttered things like “motherfucker!” and “screw you!”, but they seemed to be directed at whatever he was looking at.

  Their food arrived a little later, and they accepted it in silence and began eating. Caleb had finished his breakfast. It was actually very good, but he’d barely tasted it. He had no reason to stay any longer, and he needed to get going soon to ensure that he made the most of the daylight, but he couldn’t tear himself away just yet.

  “Are you going to finish the food I’ve bought for you?” the guy spat.

  “Kurt, I’m full,” she said in a tight voice.”

  “You’re always wasting my fucking money. I work my ass off getting you nice things, and look at all the thanks I get.”

  “If you didn’t stop me from working, you wouldn’t have to.”

  “Don’t you dare start that again, you ungrateful whore! There’s no way any woman of mine is going to work.”

  She stood up and ran past Caleb on her way to the bathroom. He barely caught a glimpse of her face, but he registered that her incredible body was encased in yet another unflattering outfit – a shapeless, knee-length cardigan over loose blue jeans. His head spun. His strongest urge was to follow her and see if she was okay, but he was a stranger to her, and she’d most likely freak out. He could speak to the boyfriend and tell him to treat his girl more respectfully, but he could see how that one would play out too. He’d most likely take it out on her later. Caleb clenched his fists. The guy was a nasty piece of work, undoubtedly, but it was really none of his business, and he had no right to intervene.

  Just then, the guy got up too and stormed after her. Caleb half got to his feet, his bear pushing him to follow. Then he sunk down onto his seat again. He couldn’t just charge in there. Humans didn’t act like that. He’d give them three minutes, and if they weren’t back by then, he’d go after them, he decided.

  At two minutes and forty-six seconds, the guy was back, with the woman in tow. Caleb barely glanced at the swaggering wolf. His focus was all on the woman, and her tear-stained eyes. She was walking slowly, dejectedly. As she approached the table, her eyes met Caleb’s and they widened as she recognized him. Her left hand tugged at the opposite sleeve of her cardigan, pulling it down, and his stomach tightened at the sight of the large purple bruise encircling it.

  “It’s not respectful for a woman to leave the table until the man has finished his meal,” the wolf said as the woman sat down again, his voice dripping with satisfaction. She made a small sound, more of a whimper than a word. That son of a bitch is abusing her, Caleb thought, every fiber in his body engaged with containing his bear, which was doing its best to burst out of him. He knew what would happen if he allowed himself to shift. His bear would kill the wolf in seconds, everyone would go crazy, he’d maybe get shot – if any of the locals sitting up the opposite end of the restaurant had guns, which was pretty likely – and the news would be out. And the shifter secret, which had been concealed for so many generations, would be over. He couldn’t do nothing. But he needed to be a little more subtle.

  He waved the waitress over for the check and borrowed her pen. Then he found a gas station receipt in his back pocket, and he began to write. He wasn’t used to expressing himself on paper, and there wasn’t much space on the receipt, but he knew what he needed to say. He wrote:

  I’m leaving here in 30 minutes. If you want an escape, I’ll be waiting in the parking lot of the motel, right outside room 17.

  He stared at his scrawl. Would she think he was crazy? Maybe. But there had been something a little desperate in her eyes, something that didn’t accept the way she was being treated. Now he had to get the message to her. He watched the waitress going back and forth, wondering if she could help out. And then the wolf’s phone rang.

  “Yeah?” he barked. He heaved himself to his feet and stepped out from the booth. Caleb’s pulse quickened. He turned left and walked towards the door of the restaurant, but he didn’t go outside. Instead, he hung around the entranceway, looking out of the window. It was now or never. Caleb slipped out of his own booth and stepped in front of the woman. She looked up at him, startled. He didn’t say anything; he couldn’t risk the wolf hearing him. Instead, he laid the note on the table. Her brow furrowing, she read it. And then she looked up at him again, as his attention flickered between her and the wolf. He thought he saw a spark of hope in her eyes. He smiled at her, trying to convey his sincerity, and then he walked fast out of the restaurant, while the wolf was still looking the other way.

  Back in his room, Caleb packed his bag, almost shaking with the adrenaline rushing through his body. His bear was scratching at his insides, demanding to be let out so it could give in to its instincts. He ignored it, and went to check out. Then he got into his car and waited.

  Thirty minutes passed, and she didn’t come. He hadn’t really expected her to be early though. Thirty-five minutes, and there was still no sign of her. Maybe she thinks I’m a psychopath, who hands out messages to women in restaurants to lure them into his car, he thought. Another five minutes passed and as he recalled the incident in the restaurant, doubts began to blur the edges of his thoughts. Maybe I am crazy, and the wolf isn’t actually abusive. Perhaps they just had an argument, as couples do, and the bruise on her arm was from something else. But what? What apart from a hand could make such a circular bruise? And then another thought hit him, which made him open the car door and start to climb out. Or what if I’m right, but the wolf has found the note and he’s created even more trouble for her? He groaned and closed the door again. There was no way of telling. And that was the most difficult thing. I’ll wait for another ten minutes, he decided.

  He watched the display on his phone as the time turned to 09:58. He’d waited 11 more minutes. Th
is is ridiculous. I can’t sit here all day, chasing a hope. His heart heavy, he started the car up. As he looked in the rear-view mirror, he caught sight of a blurry figure running across the snow from far away.

  Chapter Six

  Two days earlier

  Paige Buchanan finished applying her make-up and took a step back to survey her reflection in the mirror. She was only wearing mascara, a hint of concealer and powder, but it was as much as she dared to apply. She was wearing a light, black silk shirt that flowed over her large bust and straight-legged black jeans. They were old clothes that she’d owned since her teens, but thankfully they still fitted her. She’d dug them out of the loft earlier that day, excited that she still had them. Kurt never would’ve let her go out dressed like that. They weren’t revealing by any means, but he’d banned her from wearing black, which he’d designated as a ‘slutty color’, and only allowed her to wear loose-fitting day clothes. She turned to the side and looked at herself, and she felt a shock of recognition at the image of the person she used to be. She remembered buying this outfit when she was 19. She was just coming to terms with her size, and she’d rightly thought that this outfit was elegant. After that, she’d bought other, racier outfits as she more fully embraced her womanly curves. Until she got together with Kurt and he took control of her wardrobe. She pulled on a pair of flat, black ankle boots, picked up her purse and switched the bedroom light off. And then she sighed as she remembered something. She turned the light back on again and picked up a barrette. Returning to the mirror, she swept her long hair up into a conservative knot and pinned it firmly. She wasn’t allowed to go out with her hair loose when she wasn’t with Kurt. Although she strongly doubted that he’d make an appearance tonight, there’d be all hell to pay if he caught her with ‘slut hair’.

  Downstairs, Paige walked into her parents’ kitchen and her mom broke into a grin at the sight of her.

  “I remember that outfit!” she exclaimed. “You look so pretty, honey.”

  “Thanks, mom,” Paige replied, repressing a twinge of sadness. Her mom had always been very supportive of her, and encouraged her to make the most of her body, and now here she was, dressing like a nun to please Kurt.

  “What’s Kurt doing tonight?” her mom asked.

  “Probably playing video games in the hotel room,” she replied. Or watching porn. Or running drugs.

  “He knows he’s welcome to hang out with us, right?”

  “Yeah he does. He just gets a little – uh – shy sometimes.” Her mom raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything. Paige and Kurt were spending Christmas at her parents’ house, as they did every year – her one concession from Kurt to make up for her living 2,000 miles away from them. He also ‘allowed’ her to spend one evening with Tina, her best friend from high school. He always refused to spend the evening socializing with Paige’s parents, but checked into a hotel instead – something that was very embarrassing to Paige, but her parents tactfully didn’t reproach her for it. They knew that Kurt could be a little ‘difficult’ sometimes, but they really had no idea how much.

  The doorbell rang.

  “That’ll be Tina. See you later, mom,” Paige said, kissing her mom on the cheek and running for the door.

  “Have a goodnight, sweetheart. You deserve it,” her mom called after her.

  “Paige!” Tina shrieked as Paige opened the door, and swept her into a giant hug. Paige squeezed her best friend tight. It was so hard only seeing her once a year, for one day. Tina pulled back and regarded her at arms’ length.

  “You haven’t changed one bit!” she said.

  “Neither have you,” Paige replied, surveying her friend’s smokily-made up eyes and red lipstick. She also had a curvy figure, and she was wearing a tight black bombshell dress with red flowers splashed across it. They were the same height, but her 5’6” frame was elevated by a pair of scarlet spike heels. She looked great. They both loved the retro, rockabilly look, but Paige had long since thrown all of her accessories away.

  “Come on! We are going to get you drunk tonight, girl!” Tina announced as they walked out to her car.

  *

  As usual, they went to the Blues Kitchen for drinks and dinner. It was a relaxed, dimly-lit place, with photos of old jazz legends on the walls and live shows late most evenings. They settled into a corner spot and immediately ordered beers and the special ribs.

  When the waitress had taken the menus away, Tina stared at Paige for a long moment.

  “Where’s Kurt tonight?” she demanded.

  “Oh, back at the hotel he always stays at.”

  “And there’s no chance he’s coming to check up on you?”

  “I don’t think so. He never has before. I think he would consider it ‘uncool’.” Tina stifled a snort behind her hand.

  “In that case, I think you’ll be safe to let your hair down in here. Literally, as well as figuratively.”

  “Oh –” Paige lifted her hand and fingered her barrette. “You know, I’d better not.”

  “O-kay.” Tina shrugged, and Paige stared down at the table, her cheeks warming.

  The beers arrived and they toasted their annual meet-up. Tina took a huge swig of her drink, emptying almost half of her glass, before dropping it heavily on the table.

  “Kurt’s controlling you, isn’t he?” she said, fixing her friend with her green-eyed stare.

  “No –” Paige faltered. “He’s just being a guy. And I can’t act like a single girl now that I’ve got a boyfriend.” Tina’s mouth fell open.

  “Paige! Can you hear yourself? I have a boyfriend. And he loves it when I dress up and look sexy. He says it makes him feel like the luckiest guy in the world. He doesn’t mind if I dress up when I’m not with him either. Because he trusts me.” Paige fiddled with a beer mat, tearing it into strips.

  “Kurt is just a little possessive. He’s always been that way. And when we first met, it made me feel special. Like he loved me so much that he didn’t want to share me with someone else.”

  “And now?”

  “I guess I feel restricted sometimes.”

  “Paige, listen to me. When a guy makes you feel like the only girl in the world, it’s the greatest thing ever. But when he makes you feel that he’s the only person you’re allowed to have in your world, that’s something different entirely.” Paige took a swig of her beer too.

  “But – it’s not like he doesn’t let me go out or anything. I mean, I’m here with you now.”

  “And when else do you go out without him?”

  “Uh – never.”

  “Exactly.”

  The food arrived and they focused all their efforts on eating the deliciously messy ribs.

  When their plates were cleared away and they’d started on their second beers, Tina reached across the table and squeezed Paige’s hand.

  “Hun, the last thing I want to do tonight, on our one night of the year, is to upset you. But I feel like you’re not happy with Kurt. I thought it when I saw you last year as well, and the year before that. And you deserve to be happy. You’re a really great person.”

  “I am happy,” Paige insisted, but she was unable to meet Tina’s gaze.

  “Paige, come on. I’m your best friend. I’ve known you for a long time. And ever since you met Kurt and he swept you off your feet with his sexy biker ways, you’ve been like a shadow of your former self.”

  “I guess I’m just growing up, Tina. I’m not the party girl I used to be. My priorities have changed.”

  “But I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about your whole demeanor. Just look at me and tell me, hand on heart, that you’re happy, and I’ll believe you.” Paige looked down and discovered that she’d shredded a second beer mat. She let out a long breath.

  “We’ve had some difficult moments over the years, but I’m mostly happy,” she said at last.

  “Yup. And that’s why you can’t meet my eyes.” Paige looked at her and looked away again. Tina’s eyes suddenly see
med as bright as searchlights, trying to hunt the truth out of her.

  “Okay, you know what? We’re having a shot.” Tina waved to the waitress and ordered two tequilas.

  “Shit! I forgot how bad those were!” Paige said, holding her hand over her mouth. Tina winked, then folded her hands together on the table.

  “So, when you’re not happy, what’s it like?” she said. Paige squirmed on her seat. Tina was right. She knew her so well. But how could she tell her the embarrassing truth? She’d been with Kurt for almost three years now and she was becoming more and more unhappy. Kurt didn’t treat her well at all. He was extremely jealous and possessive and often aggressive towards her. He’d done his best to isolate her from everyone she loved, so he could have her all to himself. And now she lived far, far away, in a place she hated, and had no friends. His business had been going badly in the past year, and he’d become even more terrible than before. He’d even hit her twice, each time bruising her face so badly that she couldn’t go outside for a week. But when she tried to leave him, he threatened to hurt her and her family. She knew that he meant it, and that he was capable of doing it. Since then, she’d been paralyzed with fear.

  “Is he violent towards you?” Tina demanded. Paige shook her head, too choked with emotion to speak. “Tell me in words that he’s never hit you before.” Paige shook her head again and put her hands over her face. “You’re saying he’s hit you?” Paige was very still, but then she nodded. Gently, Tina took her hands and peeled them off her face. Paige forced back the tears that were threatening to spill from her eyes. “How many times?”

  “Twice,” she whispered. Tina gasped.

  “Paige! Do you realize how fucked up this is?” Paige pressed her lips together.

  “I know, I know. If you’d told me when we were in high school that I’d end up with a guy who beat on me, I would’ve laughed. But it happened slowly. First of all, he was this cool guy, who seemed to really like me, fat and all, and then little by little, he changed. I kept trying to make excuses to myself, but I know it’s not right. And, to be honest, I’m dreading going back home with him tomorrow.” Tina’s eyes had become huge and liquid, as if she was moments from tears herself.