The Deception of Destiny: A Novel

by Jennifer Walters

  Dad stood up quickly, raising his gun.

  “Mr. Lawson, please put the gun down,” my husband ordered him in a voice I didn’t even recognize.

  Bryan’s gun was drawn, as was Andrew’s.

  “How do you know my name?”

  “I’m Destiny’s husband. Now let’s put the guns down and have a talk,” Bryan said calmly, starting to lower his gun as he held his other hand up in the air.

  “Bryan, don’t,” I yelled out, crying in fear.

  “You called the police?” Andrew shouted, now pointing the gun at me.

  My ears felt hollow as I heard the many shots fired. It all happened so fast, yet in slow motion. As I came to, I realized I was on the ground and someone heavy was on top of me, crushing me. I heard the blood curdling screams and realized it was mine. My body was bloody, I couldn’t get up. That’s when I looked up and saw the horror in Jill’s face as she pulled the man in uniform off me. Policemen and paramedics filled the room and I could no longer breathe.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  I woke up in a hospital, an IV in my arm. Jill by my side, still crying.

  “What happened?” I asked. “Was I shot?”

  Jill came closer and held my hand.

  “No, Dez, you are going to be okay,” she said, except she seemed to look even sadder as she talked.

  “What is it Jill?” I asked, feeling the shooting pain in my ribs. “Who was on top of me? Was that Dad? Was he shot?”

  “Dad was shot and killed, honey,” She said, putting my hair behind my ears.

  I could see the sadness in her eyes, there was more she wasn’t telling me.

  “What is it, Jill? Tell me,” I said, anger and frustration breaking through my voice.

  “Dad’s dead, but it’s Bryan,” she cried out, sobbing hysterically into her hands. “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry.”

  “What happened, Jill! What happened to Bryan?” I yelled, even more frustrated with her stupid little hints.

  “He shot Dad and Dad shot him too. Destiny, I’m so sorry, they are both dead. He was gone when the paramedics arrived. He shot him right in the chest,” she said, holding my hands.

  I pushed her hands away.

  “No, he didn’t! You’re lying, you’re lying! Tell me the truth, tell me where he is, Jill! I want him, I need him. Tell me you’re lying, just tell me!” I screamed, sitting up and ignoring the excruciating pain that took my breath away as I sat up.

  “I’m so sorry,” she replied, standing up and backing away from me.

  I grabbed everything off the tray next to me and began throwing it at the door. I could hear Jill crying louder on the other side of the room.

  “Get out! Just get out!” I screamed at her.

  “I’m so sorry, Dez, I’m so sorry,” she repeated, running out the door and looking back with even more sadness.

  I pushed the call button for the nurses as I caught my breath and calmed down slightly. The blonde ran in the door just a minute or so later.

  “Where is my husband?” I asked, not wanting to believe what Jill told me. She had to be lying, unsure of the truth.

  Two more nurses came in the door, along with a security guard from the hospital.

  She looked at me like I was a sad, broken child.

  “I’m so sorry, Mrs. Fredrickson, he passed away.”

  I held my breath and fought the anxiety that was weakening every muscle in my body. My heart felt broken as the anger turned to pain and sadness. I cried out for him, hugging my legs to my chest. I held my breath and squeezed my chest hard, wanting to be taken from this world to be with him. What was my life without him in it?

  “Careful Mrs., you have a broken rib,” she warned me, running to my side.

  She grabbed a tissue from the box next to the bed and handed it to me so I could blow my nose and wipe my eyes.

  “I’m so sorry. Is there anything I can do?”

  “Is my baby okay?” I asked, feeling like someone was jumping on my heart and sucking all the blood out.

  “Your baby boy is going to be fine. You just need plenty of rest. Would you like me to get your sister for you now?” she asked, extreme empathy showing through her voice and the sad look on her face.

  “Yes, please,” I answered, as the rest of the crew left the room.

  She looked back at me before going to get Jill.

  “Your husband is a hero, Mrs. Fredrickson. He jumped in front of the bullet when that man tried to kill you.”

  I felt the blood empty from my face. He saved my life and my dad tried to end it.

  When Jill returned, I apologized and she crawled into the bed with me, holding me tight. I winced in pain a few times, but all I could think about was having to tell Gabby and live the rest of my life without him by my side. I cried and cried, screaming out in excruciating pain from the burning in my heart.

  “How do I go on, Jill, without Bryan? He was everything.”

  She picked up her head and ran her hand across my cheek.

  “You do it for Gabby and your baby boy. You can’t give up, not without a fight. Bryan wouldn’t want you to be unhappy.”

  “I can’t do this alone,” I cried. “How do you know it’s a boy?”

  “The nurse told me. You won’t be alone. I am right here by your side. I can move in and help you raise the kids.”

  “I can’t let you stop living your life for me.”

  “I want to. For you, for the kids. I am here as long as you need me.”

  And she did. She was there when I told Gabby about the passing of her father, the hero. She was there by my side at his funeral and she was there those mornings I couldn’t pull myself out of bed. She was there to talk me into seeing a therapist, and she was there to open the shades and make me get on with my day when the depression set in. She was there when my baby boy, Matthew Bryan Fredrickson was born, holding my hand and taking turns changing his poopy diapers.

  She was there when I ran my next marathon, with my children by her side at the finish line as I completed it. She fell in love with a guy she met at work, and I finally convinced her to leave and marry him once he proposed. She was still there as much as she could be.

  The day her daughter, Elizabeth Destiny was born, I couldn’t be prouder of her success. She had everything she wanted in life and more. As my children grew up, I never moved on. The only man I wanted in my life was Bryan, and I knew one day we would meet again. I was content with my kids, running, and work. I became an editor for the Duluth News Tribune and moved after Gabby graduated from high school. She attended The University of Duluth, majoring in Social Work. The day Matthew graduated from Denfield High School, I saw a beautiful blonde in the crowd.

  I came up behind her and tapped her on the shoulder.

  “Hello, Olivia.”

  She looked surprised to see me, scared of what I would say next.

  “I’m so sorry to hear about Bryan,” she said with teary eyes.

  “That was years ago, but thank you. I just wanted to tell you I forgive you.”

  She looked at me, happiness in her eyes as a smile spread across her perfect face.

  “You have no idea how much that means to me. Do you have a child graduating today?”

  “Yes, our son Matthew. How about you? Married, more kids?”

  “My stepson,” she said pointing to her ring. “I am married now, to a doctor from St. Mary’s. He’s an oncologist, a great man.”

  “I’m so happy for you,” I said, looking over her shoulder to see Matthew searching for me in the crowd.

  “I have to go, but it was so great seeing you.”

  Bryan was right, it felt so good to forgive. I smiled as I wrapped my baby in my arms, thankful to have raised such a sweet boy, who was now a man.

  I smiled, thinking of the day my husband graduated from Bemidji State. The uproar of cheers as he was handed his diploma.

  “I can’t believe I did it, Mom,” he said, hugging me.

  “Oh, I can believe
it. You remind me so much of your dad.”

  “I wish I could have met him,” he said, sadly.

  “Oh Matt, he’s right here with us. He’s always right here,” I said, pointing to his heart.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

  JANUARY 2017

  I opened my eyes and saw his father’s eyes looking back at me. He truly had his eyes, his dimples, his nose. I looked around the room and saw Bryan standing behind Gabby, waiting for me in his flannel shirt. He was smiling, his dimples defined. He was still young and handsome as he stared at me. He put his hands on Matthew’s shoulders and that’s when I realized they were wearing the same shirt. I wondered if Matthew could see him or feel his presence.

  I closed my eyes to rest them for a moment and drifted off to sleep.

  “What is that horrible noise coming from her? Can’t she breathe?” I heard Gabby ask.

  “That is called the death rattle. It sounds almost like a gurgling or choking sound. Although it is horrible for us to hear, it really doesn’t bother her. I can try to sit her up a little bit so it’s not so loud. I know it sounds horrifying.”

  “Yes, please.”

  I could hear Matthew’s sobs. I wanted to comfort him, hold him in my arms one last time.

  “We need to let her go, Gabby. We need to tell her it’s okay.”

  “I’m not ready, I’m not ready,” she cried out, squeezing my hand.

  “Look at her, she’s not going to get better. She has been through enough. We need to do this for her.”

  I could no longer open my eyes or move at all. One minute I could hear them talking, and the next minute I was running through fields holding Bryan’s hand again.

  I wasn’t sure what was real and what wasn’t anymore.

  “It’s not about you anymore. She needs to be at peace, be with Dad again.”

  “Oh Mom!”

  “You heard the hospice nurse, she can go any time now. We need to say our goodbyes,” he whispered to her.

  “I can’t,” she whispered back.

  “Gabby, you need to let her go. Do you really want her to live like this? Just let her go.”

  I could feel the love in the room, could feel the aura of sadness and pain that surrounded my bed. I now realized I was having a hard time telling Matthew and my husband apart. When was Matthew in the room? When was my husband really there? I felt confused, unsure of what was real and what wasn’t. How could I have forgotten my husband was already dead?

  She took a deep breath, “Mom, I love you so much. I don’t want you to leave me, I’m not ready yet. But I will never be ready. You have been there for me through the most difficult times in my life and even when I was a horrible teenager,” she let out a laugh through her tears.

  “It’s okay,” I heard Matthew assure her.

  “You are my best friend. I can’t imagine this world without you. I know it’s time for you to be with Daddy in heaven. He has been waiting so long for you. We will never forget you. Your love will forever live on in my heart. I can only wish to be half the mother you have been for me…” her voice cut off as she ran out of breath, unable to talk anymore.

  “Mom, what can I say, you have been there for me through everything in my life. The thought of my children not being able to make cakes with you or have sleepovers and play chess just breaks my heart. I know that you fought as hard as you could, but you have suffered long enough. We are going to be okay. I love you so much and I am so sorry you had to suffer like this.”

  I felt him kiss my cheek.

  “I love you, Mom. It’s time for you to leave us now and go see Dad and Grandma in heaven. We are going to be okay, I promise. It’s time,” she sniffled, kissing my forehead and squeezing my hand.

  “You are the best sister a girl could ever ask for. I will take care of your grandchildren like my own and tell them all about our crazy adventures. I got this from here, go to that husband of yours. He’s been waiting patiently for you for far too long. You will always be my best friend. I love you so much,” Jill whispered, just inches from my face.

  That night, I took Bryan’s hand and watched myself leave my home and the bed I was in for so long. I turned back and saw Jill sleeping on the couch sitting up, with Gabby’s head on her shoulder. Matthew fell asleep on the floor next to my bed, afraid to leave my side.

  I blew them a kiss and smiled as I squeezed Bryan’s hand and watched my body turn back into it’s thirty-year-old self. I felt strong and happy and free.

  “It’s about time,” Bryan said, picking me up and spinning me around. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.”

  “I’ve missed you so much,” I whispered, kissing him.

  “They will be okay, I promise. We won’t miss a thing,” he said, taking my hand again.

  “I know,” I said, walking side by side with him into the light. “I know.”