Through the Shadows

by Gloria Teague

  She didn’t notice the lonely silence of the house that night. Any sounds that normally would scare her were drowned out by her euphoric state of mind. As she gathered her things to take a long, relaxing bath, she hummed one of her all-time favorite songs from 1959. She poured a generous amount of bubble bath under the cascade of hot water. She removed her clothing and dropped them into the wicker basket next to the sink. The bathroom filled with a fragrant vapor as Tori added words to the humming, changing it just a little. Her happiness took control and while she moved her shoulders and feet in some semblance of dance, she clutched an empty cardboard cylinder that had once held toilet tissue, and sang into one end of it.

  “Every night, I hope and pray a dream lover will come my way… a man to hold in my arms and know the magic of his charms. Because I want (yeah yeah yeah) a man, (yeah yeah yeah) to call my own… I want a dream lover, so I don’t have to dream alone…”

  In the hallway outside the bathroom door, Avery Norcross smiled at Tori’s off-key singing.

  Chapter Four

  Tori slept in peace with mind and body resting together in blissful harmony. No dreams, good or bad, and no nerve-jarring surprises to awaken her. At six o’clock she was fully awake, as if she had set an alarm clock the night before. She sat in bed, yawning across the chasm that separates the valleys of sleep and waking. She was trying to remember what had happened the night before to make her feel so happy. When she did, a smile covered her relaxed features. Mother Nature was calling, but before Tori could get to the bathroom the telephone rang.

  “Good morning!”

  “Tori? How can you sound so chipper when someone wakes you from a dead sleep?”

  Laughing, Tori sat back down on the bed, crossing her legs against the urge.

  “Lydia? What in the world are you doing out of bed so early?”

  Lydia’s throaty laugh vibrated through the receiver.

  “Who said I was out of bed?”

  “Okay, why are you awake at this time of the morning?”

  “I’ve not been to sleep, yet.”

  Tori was puzzled. Was something wrong?

  Lydia lowered her voice and whispered into the phone.

  “I’ve been busy.”

  “All night? What’ve you been doing that’s so important you can’t sleep?”

  “Just buzzing around, you know, like a busy little bee.”

  “A bee? Why are you talking in code? My brain isn’t fully awake yet and you want me to solve a puzzle?”

  Even through the telephone, Tori could hear the exasperation in Lydia’s voice.

  “Think about it, darling, and you’ll know what I’m talking about.”

  Tori thoughtfully stared into space, trying to figure out what her insane agent was trying to tell her. By now, she was swinging her crossed legs, impatient to finish this conversation.

  Bee. Buzzing? A buzzing bee? B? B.E.E.? Oh, B.E.! If that isn’t it, I’m hanging up! I gotta pee so bad!

  “Well, Lydia, either you’re in a Bachelor of Engineering program, or you’re with Big Shot Editor.”

  “Ta-da! I knew my brilliant little writer could solve the mystery.”

  “Look, Lydia, I’m real happy one of us got lucky, even if it wasn’t me. But I have to run, literally. I’ve got more water backed up than Hoover Dam. So, if you’ll excuse me…”

  “Really, Victoria, you don’t have to be so crass…”

  Click! Tori dropped the receiver into its cradle as she rushed from the room.

  * * *

  Tori prepared a huge breakfast for herself. She wolfed down two eggs, bacon, toast, a muffin, and a large glass of milk. She was shocked at herself for eating so much, even as she was undoing the top button of her jeans.

  As her food digested, Tori thought about what she would do that morning. The responsible thing to do would be work on her book, but she didn’t feel like being responsible right now.

  I know; I’ll go shopping! Yeah! I’m going to buy a dress. A dress, you say? But you only wear dresses under protest. Well, I’m a woman and I can change my mind. That’s my prerogative. My inalienable right under the Southern Belle Constitution! And it’s going to be a right purty one, too!

  Giggling, Tori jumped up from her seat to plug in the old hot rollers. If she was going to buy a dress, she ought to curl her hair. She didn’t know why that made sense, but it did, at least to her. Not even barking her shin on the table leg altered her light mood.

  The weather was as happy as Tori’s feelings. The sun had at last awoken to chase the chill from the late fall day. Leaves playfully danced around her feet in a swirling eddy, looking for a playmate.

  Tori’s first stop was a dress boutique. The name of the store, Remembrance, was painted in an old world-style script. If she had stopped to think this over, she would have remembered that she had never been in a boutique in her life. In fact, just the word boutique used to irritate her to no end, but nothing could irritate Tori today.

  In the back of the shop was a display of Victorian-style clothing. Yards and yards of various colors of velvet, and rows of tiny buttons that would require the patience of Job to fasten. This is where Tori was drawn, as a magnet to steel. She held each dress, running the smooth material between her fingers, and “oohed” and “ahhed”, appreciatively. She had seen other women behave the same way and it had always annoyed her. But for some strange reason Tori was, herself, acting quite differently on this glorious morning.

  One dress in particular grabbed her attention. Floor-length, with what seemed to be a million mock-seed pearl buttons down the back, the emerald green dress with a plunging neckline beckoned her. She lifted it from the rack and held it in front of her. The skirt front of the dress had been sewn open to give a tantalizing view of yards of delicate lace beneath. She walked to a mirror, and holding out the side of the full skirt, swayed in front of her reflection, loving the way the material flowed.

  The salesclerk knew a sale when she saw one.

  “That would look stunning on you, Miss. Will you be trying it on?”

  Blushing at being caught acting like a fool, Tori shook her head.

  “Uh, no, thank you. I’m really just browsing.”

  Feeling her commission slipping through her fingers, the saleslady hastened to assure Tori that the dress was made for her.

  “Really, Miss, you would look gorgeous in this!”

  “Oh, I just don’t know. Why would I want a formal velvet gown? I’m afraid I would look ridiculous in it.”

  “No! The color would be perfect with your lovely red hair. Please, just try it on. You’ll fall in love with it when you see how beautiful you look.”

  Tori looked at the price tag hanging from the sleeve and felt faint.

  O God! I’d have to sell a lot of books to pay for this dress.

  “No, I’m sorry. I like the dress, but I simply can’t afford it, even if I did have somewhere to wear it.”

  The salesclerk’s face fell, and she turned away.

  As Tori was walking toward the door, head held low, her eye caught the gleam of one particular ring resting in a jewelry display case. The smile that met her request to see the ring closer made Tori uncomfortable, as if the ring was already a commission for the salesclerk.

  The saleslady recognized Tori’s curiosity and hurried to open the display case as Tori nodded her approval of that particular ring.

  Tori delicately turned the ring around in the palm of her hand, admiring the design. The gold was inundated with tiny green symbols, though too small to appreciate with the naked eye. The woman behind the counter, as if reading her mind, handed Tori a magnifying glass.

  As the symbols focused, Tori gasped and knew at once that she had to buy it, no matter what the cost. In old English lettering, she read

  My Victoria—My love

  A giddy, schoolgirl feeling rushed over her and Tori knew, at that moment, that she was going to buy the ring. The small price tag suspended from the ring caused only a moment�
��s hesitation.

  Damn the price!

  “Miss, you want to try it on?”

  “Never mind; it doesn’t matter if it fits or not, I like it and I’m buying it. Not only that, but I’m buying that gorgeous jade green dress to match the ring. How does that sound to you?”

  The salesclerk’s face became wreathed in a smile, mentally adding her percentage of the sale to her paycheck.”

  “I think that sounds splendid! I like a woman who knows her mind. Will that be cash or charge?”

  Even though she intended to have the items, Tori still swallowed hard when she wrote the check.

  Clutching the shop bag in her hand, Tori rushed to her car and stowed the impulsive purchases in the car trunk. All desire to shop had dissipated, so Tori went home.

  Once inside the house, she opened a small drawer of her jewelry box. She took out the rest of the items there and a few gave her sentimental twinges at the memories they stirred. She slid the box containing the ring to the back of the drawer and put the rest of the jewelry over it. The dress she placed in a garment bag and hung at the end of the rod in her closet.

  This is silly. Good grief! I act like I’m hiding those things! Who am I hiding them from? Myself? I don’t even know why I bought them! And the money I just threw away! Omigod, I must be losing my mind!

  The shrill summon of the telephone startled her, jolting Tori out her self-recrimination.

  “Hello?”

  “Good afternoon, sweetheart.”

  “Mom! How are you?”

  “I’m fine, dear. I called earlier but there was no answer.”

  “Well, Mom, that’s probably because no one was home.”

  Sharon laughed good-naturedly.

  “Don’t be such a smart-mouth, Victoria Lynn!”

  “Uh oh. Whenever I hear first and middle name, I know I’m skating on thin ice.”

  “That’s right.”

  “Okay, Mommy dearest, I’m sorry. You must have called while I was out shopping.”

  “Shopping? You, Tori? You actually went out, all by yourself, with no pressure and shopped? Are you ill?”

  Tori exhaled the sigh that all daughters reserve for when their mothers are insufferably correct.

  “Yeah. I do that, sometimes.”

  “Since when, Tori? Lydia and I beg you to go with us every time we go shopping. The few times you have conceded to join us, it was obvious you were bored to tears and only wanted to go home. Anyway, never mind all that. What did you buy?”

  “Oh, nothing. I was just looking.”

  “Looking? For what?”

  Tori hesitated, uncharacteristically annoyed with her mother’s prying.

  “Books. I was looking at books—for research.”

  “Oh, for heaven’s sake, Tori. Don’t you have enough books? Why don’t you buy a pretty dress? Oh, I forgot. You don’t like dresses, do you? I wish you did, because you look so pretty, so feminine, whenever you’re forced to wear one.”

  “Yeah, right,” Tori sighed. “I’m sorry if I just feel more comfortable in jeans and a big, ol’ sloppy t-shirt. Do I disappoint you, Mom?”

  “No, of course not, darling. I would be proud of you if you wore a burlap sack with a rope for a belt. My baby is lovely, no matter what she wears. If intelligence and love could be worn outside, you would be even more beautiful, the loveliest woman this world has ever seen.”

  “Aw, shucks, Ma’am! You’re embarrassing me. You might be happy to know that I did something totally frivolous; I did actually buy a ring. Surprise!”

  “You’re right, Tori, that does make me happy. Tell me what it looks like.”

  She didn’t know why, but Tori didn’t mention the dress.

  “Aw, the ring’s nothing special, just a gold-plated band with some kind of cheap green glass around it. I’ll show you sometime. What’re you and your partner in crime up to today?” Sharon would make such a fuss if she knew not only how beautiful, antique and expensive the ring was, but she’d probably tell Lydia. Tori wasn’t in the mood for a lecture.

  “Well, that’s one reason I’m calling. Lydia thought we girls might enjoy having dinner together, then catch a movie after. It sounds like a good idea to me. What d’you think? Want to go? Come on, honey. Spend some time with your two biggest fans.”

  Tori surprised her mother by saying yes. She felt guilty when she heard the gratitude in Sharon’s voice. She was going to have to spend more time with her mother and stop locking herself in the computer room for weeks at a time. Living alone, being your own boss, made it easy to forget about family that missed and loved you.

  They discussed meeting Lydia at the restaurant at seven o’clock. Then they talked about what movies were available.

  “Wear something warm tonight, Tori. It’s supposed to be quite chilly.”

  “Yes, Mommy.”

  “There goes that mouth, again! See you at seven, honey. I love you.”

  “I love you too, Mom.”

  Tori sat down in front of the computer to knock out a few more pages before she had to leave for dinner. She lost track of time and was shocked when she looked at the clock and saw it was already six o’clock. Later, she wasn’t sure if she had become immersed in her writing or if she had fallen asleep again.

  It was right after dessert that Tori discovered the real reason for her dinner invitation. Mother and agent had decided it was high time Tori started dating. They even had a couple of prospects lined up. When Tori saw where the conversation was leading, she began to shake her head, more forcefully with each sentence spoken.

  “No, no, no! I do not need a date. Where is it written that I have to be with a man to be happy and fulfilled? Neither one of you is married, yet you seem to be relatively happy.”

  Lydia broke in before Sharon could open her mouth, as usual.

  “No, love, neither one of us is married. But we do date, and would get married in a heartbeat, if the right man came along. At least we’re trying and not moldering away at home just sitting on our arse.”

  Tori covered her mouth to stifle the laughter bubbling up.

  “Arse? You know, it’s funny, Lydia, that whenever you’re angry, or drunk, your cockney accent just slips out. And all that money you spent for accent adjustment!”

  Lydia’s face was turning a bright red as she glanced around the restaurant, as if to remind herself she was in public.

  “Just don’t you worry about my accent, young lady. Sharon, didn’t you teach this brat to watch her manners?”

  Tori’s grin widened.

  “Yes, and she also taught me to respect my elders. I’m sorry if I haven’t shown you the respect your age deserves, Lydia.”

  Lydia saw the comment for what it was, her young client teasing her.

  “Why I oughta…”

  Sharon hadn’t spoken for several minutes because she was overcome with trying to hold the laughter inside. Unable to hold it any longer, she exploded, causing all heads in the restaurant to turn. Gaining control of herself, she turned to her dinner companions.

  “Maybe we should get out of here before we’re thrown out. It’s about time for the movie, anyway.”

  The three ladies walked out, drawing appreciative glances from the male patrons. Most of the women present began to prattle about proper conduct in public.

  The movie, about a young warrior of the eighteenth century, was incredibly romantic. Tori was so enthralled, so intensely concentrated on the film, she scarcely breathed until the final credits rolled over the screen. She turned to Lydia and Sharon and was touched when she noticed they had been crying. Both women dabbed at their eyes, glancing at Tori as if daring her to comment on it. Few words were spoken as they each walked to their car. A warm glow of a shared experience enveloped them as they kissed each other good night.

  Tori didn’t bother to turn on the car radio. She drove home wrapped in a filmy haze that only the romantic at heart could understand. The landscape passed without notice and Tori later didn’t rem
ember the whole trip home.

  The hush of the house welcomed Tori like an old friend. She closed the door behind her, dropped her purse and removed her jacket, all without conscious effort. There was a shiny patina over her face and an unfocused look in her eyes. It softened her mouth and gave the appearance of a woman whose long-suppressed desires were fighting to overcome her control.

  Tori turned on the bath water, steam rising to blur her image in the wide expanse of mirror over the sink. She leaned against the doorframe, staring into the damp mist, and wearing a soft smile. In her mind, Tori was imagining Avery Norcross in the lead of the movie she had just seen. The proud horse he rode was Mankala, man and beast roaming the countryside. The leading lady in the film was her, a role she would have clasped to her heart.

  She and Avery were lying beneath an outcropping of rock, which formed a cave for the lovers to meet in secret. He whispered words of love in her eager ear and held her in his lover’s embrace. Mankala stood watch over his master and his woman, raising his head occasionally to survey the land, just as his master did. Avery kissed her softly, tenderly removing the green velvet dress from her trembling body. Her back arched in acceptance and desire…

  And water poured over the edge of the tub to soak the carpet.

  “Oh man! Stand here daydreaming like a sex-starved fool and ruining the floor! I shouldn’t let my imagination take over unless I’m in the safety of the computer room. God, what a mess!”

  It took every towel she owned to damp dry the mess. She threw all of them in the washer then went to take her bath. Annoyance evaporated as she worked shampoo through her long hair. Artificial light cast shimmering glints across the copper curls. Tori leaned back to allow the warm water to ease aching muscles and she fell into a deep sleep, almost immediately.

  An arctic blast of air touched her body, causing the flesh to pucker in reaction to the drop in temperature. Tori jumped from the tub, pulling the plug as she stood on the damp carpet. Feeling as if someone were watching her, she spun around to grab her towel. But, of course, there was no one there.