Camilla sinks back against the worktop. ‘I do nothing but worry about her, though. You know that, Dominic.’
He moves across to her and takes her hand. I’m not easily fooled by people but it’s getting harder to believe that this is an abusive man, although I know from experience that they can be extremely charming with other people. But still, Alison’s text seems to refute everything she’s said so far.
But she is tied up in what happened to Zach and Josie, I know it.
‘Well, I thought it might be good for you to speak to Mia. She’s a counsellor, too, so I think it will help us all actually.’ He turns to me and offers an apologetic smile.
Camilla nods, but a frown appears on her husband’s face. ‘All this talking,’ says Anthony. ‘It hasn’t done Alison any good so far, has it? And it’s been years. We’ve never cared about money and we’ll pay anything we need to in order to help her, but we really have very little left now.’
I shouldn’t be surprised to hear Alison had been seeing someone before she came to me. ‘I won’t take any of your money,’ I say to Anthony. ‘I just want to help Alison.’
‘I, um, thank you. That’s very kind of you.’
‘I really think Mia’s the best person to help us,’ Dominic says. ‘Especially as it seems finding Mia has heightened Alison’s obsession, for some reason.’
‘Don’t call it that,’ Anthony says. ‘It’s not an obsession. She just needs help, that’s all.’
This isn’t the first time I’ve felt out of my depth since Alison stepped into my life, and I hate feeling out of control. ‘Just what exactly is going on?’ I say to all of them.
‘Let’s go and sit in the garden,’ Camilla says. ‘It’s too crowded in here.’
We all trudge outside and I’m grateful to breathe in the fresh air. The garden is quite large, given the size of the flat, and it’s freshly mown and as neat as the inside.
As soon as we’ve sat down, Camilla begins speaking. ‘My daughter’s not a bad person, Mia. She’s not. She just… well, what happened to Josie hit her really hard.’
She must see the doubt scrawled on my face because she quickly adds to her statement. ‘I know they weren’t close, but they did live together all those months, so Alison felt a part of Josie’s life, I suppose.’
I tell her that’s understandable, but from everything Alison’s said about Josie I wonder just how true this is. She disliked her intensely, so why would she care about never seeing Josie again? Alison claimed that Dominic is somehow connected to Josie’s disappearance, but now that doesn’t seem likely. So why is she doing all this?
No matter how much I think about it, or find out, I still don’t know who to trust.
‘She fell apart after it happened,’ Anthony says. ‘Didn’t even finish her degree and never tried to go back. It was the beginning of the trouble for her. She just seemed to have no direction. No purpose any more.’
‘I think she’s made Josie her purpose,’ adds Dominic. ‘It gives her something to do, especially now she’s having a break from work.’ He shakes his head. ‘I’ve tried to help her, Mia, I really have, but nothing works. And now she’s made up this stuff about me abusing her. Why would she do that?’
‘Because she’s sick and she needs help. Medication or something.’ Anthony answers before I can even think of how to respond to this question.
‘I’ll do whatever I can to help her,’ I say. ‘But I need a lot more information first. What was she like before she met Josie?’
‘She was always a clever child,’ Camilla says, ‘but she never found it easy to make friends. Socialising just wasn’t her strong point. But we weren’t worried about it because she was doing so well academically. We had no concerns about her future.’
‘Until she met Josie.’ Anthony reaches for his wife’s hand. ‘That was the start of it, I think. She just had so much hatred for that girl, though as far as we could see Josie hadn’t done anything other than be a totally different person from Alison.’
It’s a struggle to get this next question out. ‘I know this may be hard to hear, but do you think she may have been jealous of Josie?’
Camilla is quick to disagree. ‘No, I don’t think it was that, I really don’t. Alison’s a pretty girl, why would she be jealous of anyone?’
I have to set her straight. ‘Jealousy isn’t just about looks, Camilla. It can be about any aspect of someone. Anything in their life.’
‘But that girl had nothing. Her mother’s boyfriend almost beat her to death and her mum did nothing. Alison couldn’t have been loved more. So why would she be jealous of that girl?’
‘I don’t know.’ If I did know, then I’d understand exactly what Alison is playing at, but I’m still none the wiser.
I turn to Dominic. ‘Alison only just found me and it’s been five years since it happened. Why now?’
He shrugs. ‘Only she can answer that. I’ve tried to find out but I have no idea.’
The photo. It’s got to be linked to that.
For the next half hour I listen while Camilla and Anthony paint me a picture of their daughter, but at the end of it I still have no clue what she’s doing, or who to believe.
‘We’d better get going,’ Dominic says. ‘I’ve got a lot of things to prepare for my classes tomorrow.’
* * *
In the car, Dominic directs me back to Finchley. ‘So now do you believe me?’
‘I might, but there’s one thing I need to check first. When I drop you off, can I come in for a minute?’
Dominic frowns. ‘Okay – but why? I’m not hiding her there, if that’s what you’re thinking.’
‘If you want to help Alison, please just humour me.’
It’s so different being in Alison’s house this time. My perspective has shifted, even though I’m still not sure what I believe.
‘I’d offer you a drink,’ Dominic says, ‘but I’m sure you don’t want one. So are you going to tell me why you wanted to come here?’
I feel braver than I thought I would, being here, but that’s because I’ve got everything at stake. Freya. Will. And I’ll do whatever I can to protect them. ‘I need to see your computer, Dominic. I’m sorry, I know it’s intrusive, but, well, when I tell you why, I hope you’ll understand.’
He frowns and stares at me, probably shocked by my audacity.
‘But why would you need to see my computer? What’s it got to do with Alison? She has her own laptop, she never uses mine.’
I make a split-second decision, hoping I don’t regret it, and tell him everything Alison has told me, about the picture she found on his computer, and her suspicions that Dominic was involved in Josie’s death. I’ve got nothing to lose now; at least one of them is lying to me and this is the only way to find out who it is.
Dominic sits down and buries his head in his hands. ‘I can’t believe she’d say something like that. She can’t really think I had anything to do with Josie… Why would she tell you all this?’
‘She said the photo was on your computer, Dominic. And that it was probably downloaded from your phone. The video I saw actually showed her finding it.’
‘So that’s why you want to see it?’ He jumps up. ‘Come on. I’ll even let you switch it on just so you know I’m not getting rid of anything on there.’
Upstairs in his study he stays true to his word and I turn on his computer while he keeps his distance, hovering in the doorway. ‘I don’t have a password on it,’ he says. ‘Never thought there was any need – it’s only me and Alison living here. And I thought I could trust her.’ He sighs. ‘Anyway, you should probably take a seat – it might take you a while to check everywhere for that photo.’
I retrace the steps Alison filmed herself taking, and browse Dominic’s photos, but there is no sign of Josie. I even see the photos it was jammed between, and this convinces me even more the photo was planted. There’s no way Dominic could have known I would come here and ask to check his computer, and why would he d
elete it now after keeping it for all these years? It must have been Alison. She put it there and tried to make him look guilty – but why?
For the next half hour I thoroughly scan the rest of Dominic’s computer, just to make sure the photo isn’t anywhere else. There are plenty of lesson plans and other work documents, but nothing remotely personal.
‘I don’t use it for anything other than work,’ he explains, as if he knows exactly what I’m thinking. He’s sitting on the small sofa in the corner of the study, watching everything I do. ‘The truth is I’m not very good with technology. Alison always sorts out the computer stuff in the house. She’s quite the expert, actually.’
‘Well, the photo’s not here,’ I say. ‘Not anywhere I can find it at least.’
‘So now will you finally believe me?’
‘If I’m going to help you, and help Alison, I need to know everything you know about what happened that night with my husband and Josie.’
‘Well, that’s not much. Anyway, how’s this going to help Alison?’
‘You said yourself she’s fixated on what happened to Josie, so I believe that’s why she’s come to me. I think she’s crying out for help.’
‘So why accuse me of harming Josie? And all the abuse stuff?’
‘Because she needed me to listen to her, and that certainly got my attention.’
‘You’re a counsellor, though. You would have helped her anyway, even if she hadn’t said all that.’
I shake my head. ‘Actually, if the situation wasn’t so desperate I probably would have told her I was too close to this to be able to help her. I would have referred her to someone else.’
He considers my words for a moment. ‘I suppose that makes sense. Nothing else does, though.’
But it’s all starting to become clear to me now.
Alison knows exactly what happened to Josie.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Josie
* * *
I’m shattered when I get home from Brighton. All I want to do is crawl into bed and pretend the world doesn’t exist. My whole body aches but it doesn’t feel like a physical pain. It’s emotional. Maybe it’s fear that I’ll never see Kieren again. He’s too young to tell anyone he wants to come and live with me, and I’ve tried everything with social services, so, other than kidnapping him, there’s nothing I can do, and that cuts like a knife wound; the worst pain I’ve ever felt. But in my usual style, I do the only thing I can: I block it out. Make it go away. Don’t think about anything or anyone.
I almost scream when I open my bedroom door and Alison is there, sitting on my bed in total darkness, except for the glow coming from my laptop screen. I don’t remember leaving it on. I’m sure I didn’t.
‘What are you doing in here? Get out, Alison.’ I don’t care if I sound rude, or nasty or anything else. I’ve had enough of this girl.
‘I thought we could start again,’ she says, her voice too jolly. I’ve never heard her like this before so it takes me a moment to work out that she’s drunk. ‘Here, I’ve poured us some wine.’
There are two glasses on the floor: one of them almost empty and the other full. ‘I’ve been saving it for you, Josie. Waiting for you to get home. I’m sure you like rosé.’ She picks up the full glass.
I wouldn’t believe this if it wasn’t right in front of me: pure, innocent Alison is sloshed. I bet she’s so unused to alcohol she only needed a sip for it to go straight to her head.
‘I know I shouldn’t be in here,’ she says. ‘Sorry. But let’s have a drink together. It’s something we should have done a long time ago.’ She waves her glass around and wine spills onto my duvet. ‘Make peace.’
I join her on my bed. ‘I don’t drink any more, Alison. You know that.’
‘Oh, really?’ She takes a swig of wine, far too much in one go. ‘And why’s that, then?’
‘Well, you’re the one who told me I had a drink problem.’ I shouldn’t be engaging in this conversation with her but I’m too exhausted to fight too hard.
She chuckles. ‘Did I really say that? Oh yeah. Well, you do, actually. Sorry, but it’s true.’
But she looks far from sorry. I should have known her so-called ‘making peace’ wouldn’t last two seconds. ‘Okay, Alison, I think you should go now. Your room is right next door.’
She doesn’t move. ‘Hang on. I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have said that. Look, I’ll put my drink down so neither of us has any.’ She leans over and fumbles to put her glass down on the floor. I quickly grab it from her before the whole thing ends up all over the carpet. The flat’s already shabby but when it’s time to leave I’m not losing my deposit because of Alison.
‘Let’s talk about something else,’ she continues.
For the first time in my life I give in. ‘Fine, but it’s late and I need to get some sleep soon. I’ve got an early shift in the coffee shop tomorrow.’
She smiles, and I’m not sure why this is making her so happy. It’s as if the alcohol has transformed her personality, rather than just making her lose her inhibitions. ‘Okay. So, something interesting happened today, Josie. Craig was round here when I got home. Knocking on the door. Actually, make that pounding on the door.’
I stiffen. ‘What did he say? Did you let him in?’
‘Of course I let him in. He’s your boyfriend, isn’t he? Well, he was your boyfriend. He told me you two had pretty much broken up but he had no idea why.’
It makes me uncomfortable that Alison is prying into my business when for months we’ve barely said more than a few sentences to each other. And most of those were insults. ‘What did you say to that?’
‘I told him I didn’t even know you two were together. He seemed a bit upset by that, but I told him not to take it personally, that these things happen. You know, all the platitudes. But he was very upset.’
But I did the right thing for him. It’s better to be cruel to him now than get further involved before realising it isn’t right. That would cut him up even more.
Alison reaches for her glass. ‘He’s really got it bad for you, hasn’t he? Poor guy. Still, I’m sure you’ll find someone else soon. People like you always do.’
‘What the hell is that supposed to mean, Alison?’
She holds up her hands. ‘I meant it as a compliment. You’re an attractive girl.’ Her words are forced, unnatural, so now I know for sure she’s playing some kind of sick game.
‘I need to get some sleep now. Goodnight, Alison.’ I pick up the bottle of wine lying on my bed and thrust it towards her. ‘Here you go.’
She pulls herself up and staggers to her feet. ‘Well, it’s been nice having this chat. We must do it again soon. How come you never have family here?’
Her sudden question stuns me into silence, so it takes me a moment before I can speak. ‘Goodnight, Alison.’
As soon as she’s gone I pull out my phone. I ignored it all the way home from Brighton because I didn’t want to think about Craig. About anything. But now I know he was here, I need to talk to him.
He picks up immediately. ‘Josie, thank God! I’ve been trying to call you all day.’
‘I know. I’m sorry, I just wasn’t ready to talk. Did you come to my flat?’
‘Yeah, didn’t you get any of my voicemails?’
‘I haven’t checked them. Sorry.’
‘Josie, your flatmate is a freak. She… Look, can we meet and talk about this?’
‘It’s been a long day and I need to go to bed, Craig, I’m really knackered. But you’re right about Alison being a bit strange. I thought I’d told you that.’
‘You did. But, seriously, this was something else. She’s something else. She told me all this crazy stuff. I mean, really crazy stuff. What is up with her?’
His words hit me like a fist. ‘What… what exactly did she say? Tell me everything.’
‘She made up all this stuff about you and I know it’s all bull.’
‘Just tell me!’ He doesn’t deserve it
, but it’s an effort not to scream at him.
‘She said your mum’s boyfriend tried to kill you and left you for dead.’
My blood freezes. Alison must have found out about it on the Internet. Since moving to London I’ve kept this from everyone but Zach and it feels like a violation for anyone to be bringing it up. I can’t speak.
‘Josie? Are you there?’
Eventually I find some words. ‘I’m here.’
‘Why would she say that?’
‘Because she hates me, Craig. And she’s crazy.’
‘I’m so sorry, Josie, she almost had me believing her. I mean, she seemed so convincing. But then she told me some other stuff that I know isn’t true.’
The first thing I think is that Alison probably told him I did something with Aaron; that I deliberately came between them. I prepare myself for this. But what Craig says next shocks me to my core.
‘She said you’ve been sleeping with Zach Hamilton.’
* * *
‘What sick game are you playing?’ I throw my phone at Alison and it smacks against her arm. I’m not usually a violent person but my anger is uncontrollable. She’s really crossed a line this time.
‘Let me guess. You’ve spoken to Craig and he told you what I said. Well, it’s all true, isn’t it?’
It’s a struggle to be calm but I can’t lose control here. ‘You know I could get you in a lot of trouble for spreading malicious lies about me?’
‘Yes, you could. If they were lies. But everything I said is true. So go ahead and report whatever you want to whoever you want. Actually, an investigation into your sick affair would be a good thing.’
Alison has won. All along she’s wanted to screw with me and now she’s finally found something that will. Even though Zach has done nothing wrong, even a hint of anything like this would destroy his career. I can’t let that happen, not after everything he’s done for me.
Anger explodes within me and now I am out of control, witnessing my body doing something I never thought I could: rushing to Alison’s bed and grabbing her by the throat. Even the voice coming from me doesn’t sound like my own. ‘Go ahead, but if you do anything to hurt Zach in any way I will make it my mission in life to destroy your miserable existence. So make a choice, Alison, because if you spread these lies around, I will never let this go.’ And then I walk away, hearing her gulps as she tries to recover herself.
Silent Lies: A gripping psychological thriller Page 23