One day we’d have our own place, in Seattle, or maybe in San Diego. I had no idea what the future held for us, but I knew we’d face it together.
Twenty-Five
Tess
While growing up, I traveled with Dad during the summers while he was on tour. It was an adventure. I loved visiting new cities, trying new foods, and just being with him. Kaden Hades acted like a celebrity outside our family. When he was with us, he was just my dad. A man who tried to spend some time with us while working.
We’d fly with him to some of the cities where he played, while other times, we’d be traveling in his bus. Big stadiums, tours, and live music were part of my childhood. I couldn’t remember being excited during his concerts. Not the way I was when I stepped foot into Madison Square Garden to watch Gage play.
Gage, my boyfriend. The man who made my heart pound against my ribcage at a mile per minute just by thinking of him, was about to play his biggest concert yet.
“Can I see him before he plays?” I asked Dad as we approached the door that read, Staff Only.
“It’s your choice,” he answered showing me the backstage passes. “Either way would work for him, I’m sure.”
“When Sadie visited you, did she spend time with you before the concert?” I asked curiously while I stared at the big door. It had been years since the last time I’d been backstage.
He smirked. “She did, sometimes it was only minutes. I’m sure he’ll like seeing you before he plays.”
I sucked in a breath and knocked on the door. A large man swung the door open and stared at me with his dark brown eyes.
“Can I help you?”
“Gage.” I swallowed the big knot on my throat.
“I’m looking for Gage Rodin,” I said showing him the lanyard I carried around my neck.
“You and many others sweetheart,” he rolled his eyes and pulled a clipboard. “Name?”
“Eric, man, how are you?” Dad greeted the guy.
“Hades, I had no idea you’re coming tonight, boss,” Eric smiled at him.
The guy shook hands with Dad, clapping his. “What are you doing here?”
“We’re looking for Gage,” I repeated.
Eric stared at me and shook his head. Then he looked at Dad and asked, “Is this Tessy?”
My cheeks heated up. This wasn’t the first guy in the past ten minutes that had saw me and called me Tessy.
“I still remember when you were a tiny girl with these piggy tails, dancing around the stage while your dad was doing sound check,” he said, just like the two guys before him. “Where’s the other one?”
I smiled, “Hannah stayed in the hotel.” She should be here, suffering with me.
“Yes, the girls are all grown up,” Dad grinned proudly. “Tess, you might not remember Eric, but he worked for Killing Hades during a few concerts when you were six or maybe seven. He’s in charge of Gage’s security.”
“Nice to meet you,” I nodded.
I felt bad that I couldn’t remember him. There used to be so many people around Dad. Duncan, Uncle Jax and Uncle Spencer. His bodyguards were the only people I remember perfectly.
“We might need to increase his security soon, Hades. He attracts the fans like honey and bees,” Eric said whistling.
I smiled at his comment. Gage’s career was heading in the right direction.
“Is he around?” I began looking toward the big room.
Eric moved away, “He’s inside. Go down the corridor. The third door to your left is his dressing room. Not sure if he’s there though. He likes to be in a quiet room before he goes out to the stage.”
“Thanks,” I said.
I sprinted through the crowded hallway and stopped right at the door with Gage’s name on it. When the door swung open, my eyes opened wide. I expected to find Gage alone. Instead I found a crowded room. I doubted a needle could fit inside but after waving my hand at the chick who opened the door, I step into the room. People were talking, drinking, and laughing. It was a party.
Pulling out my phone, I texted Gage.
Tess: Where are you?
Gage: Madison Square Garden?
Tess: I get that part, but where?
Gage: My dressing room.
Tess: It’s kind of hard to find you in here.
Gage: Where are you?
Tess: Your dressing room.
“Turtle,” I heard his voice, turned around and saw him sprinting across the room toward me.
“Hey,” I said when he lifted me off the floor and twirled me around.
“You’re here,” he mumbled while setting my feet back on the floor as his mouth claimed mine with a passionate kiss.
My fingers slid up his back. I closed my eyes, forgetting the noise and the people around us. But the kiss didn’t last long enough.
He pressed his warm lips behind my ear and whispered, “I missed you so fucking much.”
“It’s only been a week,” I reminded him, running my hands through his hair as I stared into his dreamy eyes, melting with their warmth. “But I missed you just as much.”
“Let’s go to a more private place,” he suggested and grabbed my hand.
We left the room and got stopped by my father.
“You’re on in five, Rodin,” he warned him.
“Will you be by the stage while I play?” Gage stared at me for a moment, contemplating me with a serious expression. Then, he smiled and looked at my dad. “Sorry, Kaden. I have a new song, and this is the best time to release it.”
Dad shook his head, but I could see him biting a smile.
Gage kissed my cheek and grabbed my hand. When we were walking toward the stage he looked at Eric and said, “Keep an eye on my girl, man.”
“I love you, Tess Hades,” he said giving me a short peck on the lips. “This is for you, baby.”
When the sound of his guitar throbbed through the arena, the public began to scream his name.
“Gage! Gage!”
“I love you, Gage!”
He took center stage. His voice made my entire body vibrate. The lyrics and music undressed me the same way he did with his hands. There were thousands of fans listening to him, but it felt like it was just the two of us. The screams of the crowd and the rhythm of the band were just noise. I couldn’t take my eyes off him while he paced the front of the stage from one end to another. He played, sang, and encouraged the audience to join in for the chorus.
After the sixth song, the music stopped.
“What’s up New York?” He shouted.
The crowed responded with whistles and chants I couldn’t make out. Then, he grabbed his acoustic guitar from the pedestal close to the drum kit, and sat on a chair a roadie had pushed while he finished the last song. The lights went down and only one illuminated him.
“This is for you, Turtle,” he said and began to sing.
She’s like fire
She’s my air
She’s brave
She’s only mine
And I need her
* * *
I need her in ways I’ll never understand
I lose my mind when she’s not around
The way she kisses me
The way she loves me destroys me
And puts me back together all at once
* * *
She’s a romantic
She’s all heart
She’s all soul
She wants magic but she’s magical
* * *
I need her in ways I’ll never understand
I lose my mind when she’s not around
The way she kisses me
The way she loves me destroys me
And puts me back together all at once.
She’s beautiful, broken, wild and generous.
And she’s mine.
His words, his voice, and his emotions stripped me all the way down to my soul. My eyes filled with tears as my heart burst with love. Gage marched toward me, sporting a wide smile. I couldn’t help myself and ra
n to him. He caught me mid-air.
“I love you,” I said and sunk my hands into his hair and set my feet back on the floor. “I love you so much, Gage Rodin.”
He tipped my chin and leaned in close to me, drawing my mouth to his. His breath ghosted my lips. The air between us changed. I closed my eyes in anticipation. He pressed his lips softly against mine. When I parted my lips, Gage’s tongue glided against mine.
He kissed me as if I was the most special creature ever created. The kiss was everything more than a gesture. It became a declaration and a promise. We kissed long, until he pulled back leaving us breathless.
“I wish you could be next to me every night,” he mumbled, pressing his mouth against the side of my neck as his fingers roamed under my t-shirt.
Before I could speak, he took my mouth again. He slanted his jaw, deepening our kiss and pulling my body closer to his. Need pulsed between my legs. It was heavy and hot. His sandalwood scent combined with his musk were an intoxicating combination.
“Let’s go back to my hotel,” he said breathless, breaking our kiss. “I feel like you’re leaving too soon and I need you, now.”
“You have me tonight,” I said as we untangled from each other.
My mind was reeling as we rushed out of the arena. But my body and heart were already dreading the next morning. I wouldn’t see him until March. We only had a few hours, and I didn’t want to waste a second of them.
Twenty-Six
Gage
When I offered to join Tess in Costa Rica, I had no idea what I was signing up for. I just assumed we’d be on vacation while she watched turtles. It wasn’t anything like that. During the day, she worked at a lab and at night she had a shift watching the turtle nests.
Even though I couldn’t join her class during those lab sessions, I sat up beside her while she guarded the nests. She would tell me everything she’d learned that day. I knew that Leatherback Turtles were the largest living reptiles. They could grow to over six feet and ate jellyfish. The last night though, she was enthralled in a book and very quiet.
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah?” she said, sounding concerned.
“Next time we should go on a real vacation,” I offered. “I loved this week, but I could give an entire seminar about turtles.”
Tess’s attention finally was on me. “You’re a ridiculous man.”
“Ask me anything about turtles. Actually, I did a little research, and I think we could get a Russian tortoise,” I suggested.
“Why would we do that?”
“Because we need a pet,” I said with conviction. “Cats and dogs need a lot of attention. The turtle would be okay traveling and that species is okay in any kind of weather.”
She stared at me for a moment and then she said, “I love you, Gage Rodin.”
“I love you too, and I’m taking that as a yes,” I concluded. “So, can you take another week off?”
“We already discussed this, Rodin. I have to go back to school.”
Tess closed the book and placed it next to her. She sat up straighter, and reached for my hand. “I loved that you came all the way to Costa Rica to be with me—and that you paid for this trip. You have no idea how much it means to me.”
“Anything to make you happy, Turtle.” I tucked my fingers under her chin locking our gazes.
“Being with you makes me happy,” she continued. “You don’t have to splurge on trips.”
I leaned closer to her, and she shook her head. “Rodin, we have an agreement. No PDA’s while I’m working.”
“Fine, but once we get to our room, this rule is no longer valid—for a long time,” I warned her.
We held hands while watching the waves roll in and wash against the shore. The cool breeze felt good against my skin. This night was just perfect. The full moon shone above. Tess couldn’t have said it better. Being together made us happy. Around midnight, her replacement came to relieve us. We walked the beach in the direction of the pier where I’d left the rental car.
“I knew this trip would be amazing, but you made it perfect,” she said, staring ahead. A fleeting smile crossed her features, as though she remembered something funny. “Maybe when I’m done with school, we can do this.”
“This?” I asked confused.
“Sometimes I’ll go on tour with you, while others you’ll come with me to wherever I’m needed.”
Tess was finally allowing herself to think about the future, to plan a life with me. I had no idea what we’d do next. But that night, I knew we were going to be together forever. The realization warmed me. This wouldn’t be the last time we’d be next to a turtle nest. We had a lot more adventures together with our family.
* * *
Every other day, I drove from her place to the Deckers’ recording studio in Santa Barbara. There I wrote new songs while she was at school. The almost four-hour commute was a killer, but I loved being with my girl.
By mid-June I was on the road again, missing Tess more than I ever thought possible. But our relationship clicked like no other. When we were apart, we called each other constantly. I virtually held her hand over the line while she waited for her grades or had to study late and didn’t want to be alone. Or like the day she stayed on the phone with me while I waited to hear the International Music Awards nominees.
“This is taking forever,” Tess said. “We have at least four more categories.”
She swore I’d score an award or at least several nominations. I wasn’t holding my breath. There was a lot of talent out there and only so many categories. So far, I was nominated for Best Solo Pop Performance. That was enough for me, but Tess wanted more.
“Thank you for waking up so early for me.” I stared at her beautiful, sleepy face, resting on top of Mr. Turtle, the plush pillow I’d given her for Christmas. Without intending to, she had begun collecting turtles. Whenever I found anything turtle, I bought it for her as a gift.
“How’s London?” she asked between yawns.
“Dreadful because you’re not here. I wish you were with me.”
“Maybe next time? I might start looking for a job so I can save enough money to join you.”
She wasn’t kidding when she said her dad only gave her money for necessities. If she wanted something more and couldn’t buy it with her allowance, she had to work for it.
“If you want to come, just say the word. I’ll pay for your ticket, baby.”
“Are you saving?” She stared at me.
Tess had no trouble telling me what I should be doing with my money or how I needed to behave to make sure I took care of myself.
“Yes, ma’am. I have a 401k, an investment account, and I pay myself a salary—as my financial advisor recommended.” I winked at her.
“Good, I don’t want you to end up like those poor stars who declare bankruptcy because they live like a Roman Patrician.”
“Awe, my girl remembers my rant about Roman Patricians.”
“Ugh, don’t remind me. You’re turning me into a repository for useless facts.”
“You’re ado—”
“Shh, they’re about to name the nominees for Best Debut Artist in the pop category.”
We stayed quiet while they named the nominees for debut album, new artist of the year, album of the year, and best single.
“Oh my God, did you hear all that?” she screamed excitedly. “I’m so proud of you. We need a cabinet for all your awards.”
I was speechless. It hadn’t even been a year yet, but I had a career, an album, nominations, and I was embarking on an international tour. It was all fucking unbelievable. Most important of all, I had my dream girl.
“I love you,” I said. The awards wouldn’t matter if I didn’t have her with me.
She looked at me and sighed. “I love you more, Gage Alexander Rodin. Miss you, babe.”
“Same. It’s been a long time since I held you.”
“Too long,” she agreed.
“Come here,” I asked
her.
“If you were in the country I would, but flying to Europe takes too long, and I don’t have time off.”
I wished she’d taken the summer off and joined me, but school was her priority. Tess only had one year left before graduation. If everything went well, she’d be in Canada next summer studying narwhals and then start her PhD by the beginning of September. I was happy and proud of her. She worked so hard to achieve her goals. The next step was an online MBA to learn how to manage her conservatory.
“Hey, you know what we need?” I asked her casually. “A house.”
“What?” Her eyes widened. “You can stay here whenever you’re in town. Your name is on the lease.”
“Exactly, it’s a lease. We need a place to call home. Where do you want to live? San Diego or Seattle.”
She seemed quiet and confused for several seconds. “I’m dreaming, aren’t I?”
“It’s just a question. My things are still in storage or over at Cam’s house. I hate that cramped room we stay in at Cam’s house.”
“I live in San Diego,” she said.
“Eventually, you’re going to move back to Seattle.”
“That’s the plan, but not yet.”
“We can buy a place and start making it a home.”
She sighed. “Can I think about it?”
“There’s no pressure, baby.”
She snorted. “Sure, there isn’t, but you won’t let it go until I say yes.”
“We can buy in San Diego if you prefer.”
“See, you’re already thinking of ways to make me say yes.”
“I’m giving you options.”
“Rodin!” Someone knocked on my hotel door. “We’re leaving for the stadium in twenty, be ready.”
“I got to go, baby,” I said apologetically. “But I’ll call you later tonight.”
“I might be free in a few hours if you want to … FaceTime when the concert is done.” She traced her lips with her tongue suggestively.
“Fuck, don’t make that face right now. I’ll be sporting a hard on during the concert. You know I fucking miss your beautiful body too. I’d cancel my concert just to stay and watch you get dressed.”
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