Genius

by Clare Nonhebel

CHAPTER 61

  'I hoped it would be you,’ said Eldred joyfully. The girl he had seen going into the Ladies on his first visit to the studios smiled at him.

  'I'm Eldred,’ he told her.

  She considered this. Where had she heard that name? Eldred thought she looked cute when she wrinkled her nose like that.

  'Is that a real name,’ asked Lulubelle, 'or a made-up one just for you?’

  'It's made up from my parents’ names, Edgar and Mildred,’ Eldred explained. 'I think they expected me to be half like each of them.’

  'But you turned out to be just yourself,’ the girl said.

  Eldred was surprised. 'How did you know that?’

  She shrugged her shoulders, a wide expansive gesture. 'Parents,’ she said concisely. 'My name's Lulubelle.’

  'I never heard that name before,’ said Eldred. 'Is it from your parents’ names as well?’

  'My mum's name's Lucy, or Lucinda when she's performing. I don't know what my father's name is.’

  'Is he dead?’

  'Not as far as I know,’ she said casually. 'My mum just doesn't know who he was.’

  Eldred pondered this. 'How can she not know?’ He had learned the facts of reproduction early on in his life and could not imagine how anyone could go through that process and not know it was happening.

  'It's like that in showbusiness,’ Lulubelle explained. 'The women have to sleep with the bosses who give out the work, otherwise the job goes to someone else. It's a cut-throat business.’

  'How old are you?’ asked Eldred.

  'Eleven next month.’

  She was wearing lipstick, rouge, mascara, eyeliner and three shades of eye-shadow, Eldred noticed: pink, purple and brown. He thought she looked wonderfully glamorous.

  'But you don't have to sleep with the bosses to get work,’ Eldred said.

  'No,’ she said. 'Mum does it for both of us. Only one bloke had a go at me but that was because I thought he was after my mum and she was ill. But I made sure we moved to another circus after that.’

  Eldred was horrified. 'That's child abuse.’

  'It goes on,’ said Lulubelle sagely. 'It happens to some kids all the time, and at home, which is worse because they can't get away from it. I wasn't sure about going on TV at first in case this guy saw me and found out which circus we're with now but that might have happened anyway. But he's not going to ruin my chances.’

  'Did he hurt you?’ asked Eldred.

  She shrugged again but the movement was more constricted this time. 'Don't make a big deal of it,’ she said.

  Eldred looked her in the eyes. 'You must have been very frightened,’ he said quietly.

  Her face crumpled. She turned away from him quickly. 'Now look what you've done,’ she said. 'My eyes will get smudged and my mum will be annoyed if she has to do them all over again.’

  'Sorry,’ said Eldred.

  'It's all right,’ she said, giving an enormous sniff into a very small handkerchief. 'It's nice of you to mind. No one else does.’

  Eldred took a biro out of his pocket, took her handkerchief from her and wrote two sets of numbers on it. He handed it back to her.

  'Phone numbers, are they?’ she asked.

  'The first one's Childline,’ said Eldred, 'and the second one's mine. You can phone either of those any time.’

  'How d’you know the number of Childline?’ she asked. 'Have you been done over as well, then?’

  'No,’ he said. 'A friend of mine got into trouble and I phoned them to see if they could help him. But they told me to leave it to the police.’

  'If they wouldn't help him, they wouldn't help me, would they?’ she said. 'Especially as we're never in one place for long.’

  'No,’ said Eldred, 'they would. My friend wasn't being abused; he abused some kids.’

  'Nice friends you have,’ said Lulubelle, with another sniff.

  'He wasn't a bad man,’ said Eldred earnestly. 'I know what he did was bad but the person himself was good. I don't understand how good people can do something bad, out of the blue, but they do sometimes.’

  Lulubelle shook her head. 'No,’ she said decisively. 'If someone does something bad, they are bad. They might not have thought they were before but it just shows that they are. Bad people do bad stuff, good people do good stuff - simple as that, Eldred. Don't you be fooled.’

  'Finished your Coke and crisps?’ said Bob with the ponytail, reappearing beside them. 'Right, then. Lulu, you go with this lady here and run through your routine, and Eldred, you come and talk to Janice.’

  'See you later, Lulubelle,’ said Eldred as he was ushered away.

  'Nice meeting you,’ she said, over her shoulder. 'Have you met Keith?’

  Eldred stopped. 'Who's Keith?’

  But Lulubelle was swallowed up in the crowd.

  'Keith's the other child on the show,’ said Bob. 'You'll see him in a minute. He's in a wheelchair. He's fourteen but he's tiny, so he looks about your age. Here, Janice, here's Eldred to talk to you.’

  'Eldred, lovely to meet you,’ Janice said. She was tall and thin with sharp cheeks and protruding collarbones. Eldred wondered if she ate her meals. Perhaps she worked too hard and couldn't be bothered to cook when she went home in the evenings. He hoped Mildred wouldn't get like that; he liked her comfortable and round.

  'Pete will be along in a minute to meet you too,’ Janice continued, 'but I'll be the one asking you most of the questions. Let me just show you the set and where you'll be. We're going to talk first to Keith, because he hasn't been very well recently and he might have to go off early, though if possible we're going to keep all three of you on set all the time, and hopefully get some interaction between you.

  'Then Lulubelle will come on and do her acrobatic routine before we sit her down and have a talk, and we'll have a quick comment from her mum in the front row of the studio audience - over there. Then it'll be your turn. Most of the questions are going to be flashed up there on that screen; you'll answer some of them into this little microphone we'll clip to your shirt and some others on a computer terminal, and others will be sums and so on shouted out by the audience.’

  Eldred froze. 'I thought I was going to be interviewed,’ he said. 'Is it a test or something, then?’

  Janice smiled. 'Nothing to worry about,’ she said. 'From what I heard about you at the preliminary interview, you'll do all this standing on your head.’

  'But what kind of questions?’ asked Eldred. 'What about?’

  She patted his shoulder. 'We don't want to give away too much,’ she said. 'Spoil the fun. They won't be any more difficult than the questionnaire Rachel gave you before. Very similar.’

  'But that was in private,’ Eldred said. 'This is like a performance, isn't it?’ He looked around for Lulubelle or his mum.

  'You'll be fine,’ said Janice with finality. 'Now, Maurice the cameraman is going to have a quick word with you about which light you look at and which you don't, and Sylvie will check you for sound, and one of the girls in make-up will just adjust you for shine - I know it's not very macho but it's just for the lights, Eldred, so bear with us, will you? Okay, Jeff, I'm coming.’

  Eldred was bewildered. He forgot even to be interested in the workings of the cameras and lights. His father wasn't going to like this. He wanted to go home. He saw Mildred sitting next to a blonde lady in the front row and tried to catch her eye but Mildred was staring into space while the lady talked and smoked. She looked petrified. Eldred knew how she felt.

  'Hello,’ said a voice. It sounded very calm. Eldred turned round in relief and found himself looking down at a small freckled face with huge eyes and a wide smile. The body attached to the face was small, very thin, very twisted, and arranged apparently haphazardly in a wheelchair with a headrest positioned to one side to support the tilted head. Eldred gulped. He had never before come close to someone deformed.

  'I'm Keith,’ said the boy. 'You must be Eldred the wonder-bra
in.’ He grinned wickedly.

  'Yes,’ said Eldred.

  'I heard them talking,’ Keith said. 'Sounds like they're going to make you jump through hoops.’

  'Yes,’ Eldred said. 'I didn't know they were going to set me tests.’

  'Make the answers up if you don't know them all,’ the boy advised. 'If you come across really confident, people will be impressed.’ One tiny bent finger pressed a switch on a panel set into the arm of the wheelchair and the chair hummed and swivelled round so that its occupant was face to face with Eldred. 'At least,’ Keith said, 'they can't make me jump through hoops.’

  Eldred was overcome by the sight of him. 'What happened to you?’ he asked.

  'I was born like this,’ said Keith simply. 'Worse, really. I've had a lot of operations to get to this point.’

  'How could it be worse?’ said Eldred. He felt despair.

  'I used not to be able to bend my legs,’ Keith said. 'My knees were straight. And I couldn't use my hands or turn my head at all. And my speech is clearer now, though it's not always as good as it is today. I have good days and bad days.’

  Eldred could not see how any day could be good for someone in the state Keith was in. 'Can't you be cured?’ he said.

  'Cured of being myself?’ said Keith. 'This is the way I am. There are worse things to be than disabled.’ He saw Eldred's face and laughed. 'Think about it,’ he said. 'Only my body is crippled. Some people are crippled inside.’

  Eldred leaned forward to look at Keith on his own level. 'How?’ he asked.

  'Resentment, hatred, greed, power, fear.’ He smiled, watching Eldred struggle with his thoughts. His eyes were the clearest eyes Eldred had ever seen in his life.

  'Is that being crippled inside?’ Eldred asked.

  'Sure. Think about it. How can people be free if they're all twisted up inside with some grudge against somebody or some burning desire to make a lot of money? Whereas me, I'm free; I can think what I like when I like.’

  'But what kind of life ...’ Eldred stopped himself.

  'Go on,’ Keith encouraged. 'You won't upset me.’

  'I mean, what are you going to be?’ Eldred asked. 'What will you do when you're grown up?’

  'I am grown up,’ said Keith, 'and it's a full-time job being me. I was never expected to make it as far as this. Me being fourteen is like you being eighty-five.’

  'You mean you're going to die?’ Eldred's hands rose to his heart.

  'Sooner or later, like everybody,’ said Keith. 'Only probably sooner. It doesn't bother me. It's this life that's hard. It suits some people, Eldred, but I'm out of my element here, like this. The next stage will be better for me.’

  'Next stage?’ said Eldred. He had never heard anyone talk this way before.

  'Next life,’ said Keith. 'Heaven.’

  'Reincarnation?’ said Eldred. He had read about that in a magazine.

  Keith laughed. 'No way,’ he said. 'I'm not going to be recycled. Once is enough. We live once, we die once and we move on; we don't go round and round indefinitely.’

  'How can you know?’ said Eldred. 'Who told you that?’

  ‘Jesus Christ,’ said Keith. 'In his teaching.’

  Eldred was aghast. 'You believe that stuff? In an age of science, the third millennium?’

  'Truth doesn't change,’ said Keith tranquilly. 'Read it for yourself. Haven't you read the gospels or the Acts of the Apostles or the letters of Paul and the rest?’

  'I've heard extracts,’ said Eldred dismissively.

  Keith shook his head, a slow, painstaking process, but his eyes were full of amusement. 'Very unscientific,’ he said, 'relying on hearsay and second-hand judgments. Read them yourself.’

  'Okay, okay,’ said Eldred, stung, 'I accept that Jesus existed and was an actual figure in history but I can't be expected to believe in miracles and things reported by a group of uneducated fishermen and I don't believe he was God's son, though I expect he was a good man who impressed people and taught everyone the right way to behave.’

  'Can't have been, can he?’ said Keith. 'If he said he was the son of God when he wasn't, then he was lying so he wasn't a good man at all but a lunatic or an evil conman. But if he was telling the truth he was much more than some preachy person. And even uneducated fishermen, who were probably quite streetwise in their way, could cook up a better story than they did. They don't even agree on the details, which is exactly what you get from witnesses at a road accident or something. They all know what they saw but they all saw it differently. If someone's making up a myth, they take the trouble to get their accounts to tally, don’t they?’

  He stopped and wheezed, out of breath from this long speech.

  'Are you all right?’ asked Eldred anxiously.

  Keith nodded. A woman shot out of the crowd and seized the wheelchair.

  'You're tiring yourself out,’ she scolded Keith, but her eyes accused Eldred. 'He would insist on coming on this programme,’ she said. 'I was dead against it. It's far too much for him.’

  Keith smiled his wide, sleepy smile. 'My mum,’ he told Eldred.

  The woman softened slightly. 'Come and have your snack,’ she said. She wheeled him away. As he left, he lifted one bony finger in farewell. Eldred raised his hand and waved.