Dreaming God

by Rik Johnston

CHAPTER EIGHT

  I

  AN AWAKENING BEGINS

  SATURDAY, OCTOBER 14, 1995

  Megan Moxley awoke first that Saturday morning, and found that her daughter was still in bed, snoring like crazy, with a peaceful smile on her face. While Tuesday was knocked out, Megan was able to start breakfast and do a few cleanup chores in the kitchen without waking her. Chores take a lot of energy, so Megan pulled a baggie out from her purse, and set herself up a small line on the mirror of her makeup compact to give her the kick she needed to get the job done. Megan felt a twinge of satisfaction as the cocaine coursed through her system, making her feel a momentary invincibility. Now she was truly ready to work on the house.

  With her newly found burst of energy, Megan decided that she needed to do some laundry so she could have clean clothing for work at the diner that coming evening. She knew that she would have to take a look around Tuesday’s room and gather a few pieces of laundry to fill the load up with. She climbed the stairs and entered Tuesday’s room, and looked at the bed which was still in shambles from her nightmare. She shook her head and looked around the floor for some spare pieces of clothing to throw in the washing machine, spying a shirt, some mismatched socks, a pair or two of pants, and a hoodie. It was enough to make a load of laundry, so she headed back down the stairs and into the laundry room.

  Megan began going through the pockets and the first thing she found was a business card on it. She looked at it for a moment and it read:

  Doctor Anthony Frederiksen

  Psychiatric Medicine / Psychologist

  If I can’t help you, your treatment is free.

  “A little arrogant.” Megan thought to herself, as she placed the laundry in the washer and added some detergent, and then started it up. She went out to the living room where she saw Tuesday had just begun to stir for the morning having come down from her room. As soon as Megan saw her she put on her best mother impression, and invited her into the kitchen to talk while she finished cooking breakfast. Tuesday followed her into the kitchen and sat at the table.

  “Good morning, sweetheart.” Megan said, sounding as chipper as she could manage. “Did you sleep well?” Of course, Megan already knew the answer to this question by having seen the state of her thrashed bedding, but for the sake of conversation, she thought she would ask anyway.

  “No, I had a couple more nightmares last night.” Tuesday replied, sleepily, trying to remember the details of the two occurrences. “One of them was pretty scary, but the other one should have been, but wasn’t.”

  Megan put on her best tone of voice and if Tuesday hadn’t known better, she might have thought that her mother actually cared about her nightmare. “Oh sweetie, I’m sorry! I didn’t get home until after you got to bed last night. I had to work another double.”

  Tuesday knows she is full of it, “Yeah, you worked a double, but you didn’t come right home afterward, did you?”

  Megan paused and suddenly became defensive, “No, I didn’t. You know that I have to go and wind down after working a long day, alright? Her whole tone of voice and countenance changed at that moment. Megan isn’t used to this kind of interrogation from Tuesday, but as she’s gotten older, the confrontations seemed to be happening with more frequency.

  Tuesday had decided to cut to the chase and just called her out, “Let me guess, you went to another party at some place you’ve never been, with some guy you’ve never even met, and did God knows what until you came home and passed out, am I right?”

  The guilty look on Megan’s face was all the confirmation that Tuesday needed. After a short silence, Megan spoke up to defend herself. “Tuesday, honey. It’s not really like that.” Megan stated in her own defense.

  Tuesday chose to press her advantage while she had the upper hand, “Mom, I am getting old enough to know how the world works, you don’t have to lie to me about this.”

  Megan hung her head in shame but said nothing, hoping to avoid this discussion altogether. Tuesday wondered if she was breaking through to her, so she continued her barrage of brutal honesty, “I know you’ve been using. I know that you’re selling yourself to men. They all talk about you; about the things you do. Am I just supposed to ignore these rumors?”

  Megan began to weep a little bit and become defensive, but only very slightly. “They don’t talk about…”

  “Yeah Mom, they do!!” Tuesday shot back, her sense of purpose renewed. “You’re the only Mom I have and if something happens to you, I don’t know what I’d do without you. I love you, Mom.”

  Megan’s weeping escalated into full on bawling by this point, and Tuesday went around the table and put her arms around her, trying her best to comfort her, but Megan brushed her off her. When Megan’s crying finally slowed down, she took a deep breath and admitted something she had never admitted before, “Yeah, I know. I have a problem, but I’m not ready to quit.”

  Tuesday replied, “You having a problem isn’t the problem. I have a problem too. Everybody has problems. Right now, I need my Mom, not some party girl.”

  A shocked and hurt look crossed Megan’s face, “Is that what you think of me? I’m just some party girl?”

  “Are you feeling guilty about something?” Tuesday asked, trying to push Megan to a point of realization about her habits. “Right now, I need you more than ever and you’re never here for me.”

  “Really? I had no idea.” Megan said in an attempt to deflect the seriousness of Tuesday’s accusations with sarcasm. “Look, I know I haven’t really been a great role model for you, but I swear I will try harder from now on. I don’t know, it’s all just so crazy.” Megan wasn’t even sure she meant what she said at the time, but facing reality was much simpler when she was high. People say things in the heat of the moment.

  Tuesday and Megan shared a moment of acknowledgement, and then Tuesday made a joke in the moment, “Yeah well, get un-crazy, otherwise you’ll be seeing psychologists too.”

  The two of them laugh, but then it’s Megan’s turn to get serious with her daughter as she remembered the business card she found. She didn’t want to lose the moment, but felt it was an opportune time to bring it up, “Speaking of psychologists, you didn’t tell me that you were considering another shrink.”

  “I’m not, actually.” Tuesday said plain and simply.

  “When I was gathering your laundry, I found a card for a new shrink in your pocket.” Megan pressed, looking for answers regarding how her daughter had come into possession of the business card.

  Tuesday suddenly remembered the card that Samuel Thornton had given her the previous day and made a point to be dismissive of it. “Oh, that.” She said, rolling her eyes, trying to blow off the entire conversation.

  Megan poured herself a cup of coffee, cradling it in both hands, and then continued with her line of questioning, “What do you mean that?” She asked, knowing full well that there had to be a story behind the business card, and it was a story that she was dying to hear.

  There was no point in denying it any longer and Tuesday decided it was time to come clean, “Well, I guess it’s my turn to be honest with you now, isn’t it?”

  The possibilities began to race through Megan’s mind as she began to become very serious again. Did somebody hurt Tuesday? Was she in trouble? Pregnant? What could it be? Whatever it was, Megan wanted to get to the core of this problem, and quickly. “Why? What happened?”, Megan asked with a very direct tone.

  Tuesday exhaled and the words just slipped out as if they were greased. “I was expelled from school.”

  Megan’s eyes went wide and she nearly dropped her cup of coffee, “What?!” She snarled, thinking that Principal McCauley was singling out Tuesday again. “When?!”

  It was Tuesday’s turn to not be able to look her mother in the face, feeling embarrassed by her expulsion. She tried using her advanced fourteen-year-old evasion technique as fourteen-year-old girls often tend to do. “During the course of
yesterday, sometime.” She said, being about as vague as she could be.

  “And you were planning on telling me this, when?” Megan said, acting like a real mother would, preparing to dole out some punishment.

  “Oh, at least before the notice came in the mail.” Tuesday said in an attempt to lighten the blow with humor. “And besides, you were making such a great breakfast, and I didn’t want to spoil the mood.”

  “Why?” Megan asked, her tone turning deadly serious.

  “Because I’m hungry, that’s why.” Tuesday responded, trying to make light of the heaviness of the discussion they were having.

  Megan didn’t think she was at all funny, and continues staring at her and delivering the inquisition, “No, smarty pants, why were you expelled from school?”

  One benefit of having seen so many psychologists over the years is having the ability to manipulate situations such as this one. “Because Principal McCauley hates me.” Tuesday said in accusatory manner.

  The downside of all that therapy is having your mother attend many of those sessions with you and not being able to pull off a single drop of the psychobabble on her. “Tuesday, not everybody hates you.” Megan began, attempting to instill in her the same things Tuesday has heard repeatedly from teachers, counselors, and a plethora of other people. “You have to stop feeling like the whole world is against you.”

  Tuesday’s defenses shot up, and she was able to refute the claim with a fact, “Oh yeah, is that why that liar McCauley said he tried all morning to reach you at work on the phone? I’ll bet you never even got a call from the school.”

  “You know that I didn’t, otherwise I would have already known about this.” Megan admitted, feeling a little stupid for having tried to convince Tuesday that everything was normal. “Well, never mind, the whole world is against you, but that’s beside the point.”

  “Actually the whole world isn’t against me.” Tuesday piped up! “I met a boy at the bus stop yesterday! He and I are friends.” Tuesday made sure to place the emphasis on the word “friends’ as not to give her mom any ammunition to tease her with. Suddenly, she wasn’t sure she should have said anything at all about Jason.

  Not immediately affected by Tuesday’s revelation about a boy, Megan is staring at her daughter intently, and takes a strong drink from her cup of coffee. “Let’s stay on subject, shall we?” She said pointedly. “Why were you expelled from school?”

  Megan might not have been candidate for mother of the year, but she worked hard to make sure that Tuesday was provided for. She held down a job at Tuck’s Diner at the truck stop where she would often work a lot of overtime to help make ends meet. Putting that kind of time in required a lot of energy, and she would get that energy from coffee, sugary soda drinks, cocaine and other stimulants. She would have to go out late after work to do the jobs that were required of her in order to pay off the substances she was fronted. She rarely ever had a day off. When she wasn’t working at the diner, she was out making money in various other ways.

  Megan was not known for her patience; in fact, it was her lack of patience that had become famous around Cadence Falls. She had developed a reputation around town as being one who would do what it took to get whatever it was she wanted. In a lot of people, this would have been considered a positive trait, but not for Megan Moxley. For her this usually involved sex, petty crimes and the occasional random act of violence against people who were long overdue on certain debts. Megan had gotten herself in deep with the wrong kind of people, and she was happy that her daughter had only seen as little as she had seen. Yeah, it bothered her that she had to bring her prostitution into the same house as her daughter, but if being a hooker was the worst thing her daughter thought of her, then it was worth it to her. She didn’t want Tuesday to know that she had to sleep with her fence to earn a better percentage from the stolen goods she was trying to unload. She didn’t want her daughter to know about the burglaries she had been involved in, about the drug deals that ended in close calls with the police, about the people she had beaten within an inch of their lives to collect debts. It was bad enough that Tuesday had lied to the police for her mother on several occasions to provide an alibi for her whereabouts, and that telling those lies had been happening with greater frequency as of late.

  Megan had wondered how she had gotten in so deep paying off product they fronted her, but that’s how the criminal underworld worked. Her employers kept her high and in debt so she would always have to pay them off doing odd jobs. She was somewhat valuable to their organization, though they never gave her any sort of promotion or anything. She was good at doing the penny ante stuff, but they just couldn’t trust her to do anything important for them. And so, they kept her addicted and in just enough debt to them that she couldn’t quit, and they kept her just scared enough that she wouldn’t talk.

  The truth was, in Megan’s mind, she did what she had to do to numb herself to the point that she could take care of her daughter. Her past was such a painful reminder to her that allowing herself to feel anything or to care at all was a tragic mistake. The point is, she’d never made any real effort to try and find somebody to settle down with, to find a good step father for Tuesday, and she wasn’t interested in opening herself up for that kind of hurt again, as she had done when she was younger. It was easier to be numb than to risk killing another piece of her soul. A few men she had been with wanted more from her than to be a one-night stand, but she never allowed that to work in her favor. If anybody was good at sabotaging herself, it was Megan Moxley.

  But for the moment, the only thing Megan Moxley needed to sabotage was her daughter’s excuses for having been expelled from school. And she was waiting for an answer from Tuesday regarding this very subject.

  Tuesday squirmed a little and looked up to the ceiling, tapping her index finger repeatedly on her chin in an effort to recall the precise events of what transpired the morning of her expulsion. “The Jackson girls were up to their usual bullying and this boy stuck up for me, and then there was a fight on the bus, which I really wasn’t a part of. He and I ended up in the office and they wanted me to talk to some brain-dead school psychologist, and of course I refused to deal with that again, so that liar McCauley expelled me.” Tuesday managed to get that entire exchange out in one breath. She inhaled loudly as if to continue but it trailed off into a loud sigh.

  Megan seemed to be losing her patience. “Oh Jeez, Tuesday!! Why couldn’t you just talk to the psychologist and give the guy a chance?” She asked, clearly not having any appreciation for where the story was going.

  Tuesday’s tone had softened significantly as she continued. She didn’t like it when her mother got impatient with her; it usually meant punishment was imminent. “I refused to talk to him because he was going off on some wild déjà vu theory without first even trying to get to know me or figure out what the problem is.”

  “Do you have anything to add to this great tale of yours?” Megan asked in a huff, unrelentingly continuing her inquisition.

  She knew she ought not to push her mother any further than she already had. Tuesday could tell that the bottle was getting full and was ready to burst, and she had pretty much relayed the entire story already. “No, ma’am” was all she could muster.

  “There, that wasn’t so bad, was it?” Megan answered, as her mood visibly seemed to simmer down. “So the mystery boy’s name is Jason, huh?

  At the mention of his name, Tuesday’s eyes shot to the floor and her face became a brilliant shade of red. “Yeah.” Tuesday said and added a long pause, trying to figure out what to offer her mother and what to keep for herself. “His family just moved here from Phoenix, his dad is a lawyer, and he’s the only one who doesn’t look at me like a freak.”

  “Hey, that’s cool!!” Megan said excitedly, her mood subtly shifting from angry to elated. “Sounds like you found yourself a boyfriend!”

  This was an prompt escalation of Tuesday’s embarrassm
ent to the point where she frantically scanned the kitchen for something, anything to hide behind. The closest object was a red dishtowel sitting at the edge of the table which she quickly grabbed to conceal her face. “Mom, Stop!” She said in a meek voice. “Don’t tease me!”

  Megan began to brighten up and let down her guard enough to laugh a little bit, “But it’s so cute!” She teased, laughing as she addressed her daughter, “My little girl is growing up!! And that dishtowel is a spot-on match for your face right now.”

  “MOM!!” was all Tuesday could manage to say in a defensive tone of voice. She began swinging the dishtowel, hitting her mother with it three or four times. The two were laughing and having a great time. After a moment, Megan backed off and got serious with her daughter again.

  “Okay, okay.” Megan said, changing the tone of the conversation back to the topic at hand. “Seriously honey, what are we going to do about you not being in school?”

  But Tuesday is still in the mood to make jokes and doesn’t want to be serious, “We could put me in a school in another state on the east coast.” She offered as a suggestion, praying that it might actually be within the realm of possibility.

  Megan, however, was quick to shoot it down. “Nope. Guess again.”

  Tuesday sat for a moment pondering other ideas, and when one had finally occurred to her, her face brightened up. “We could write a letter to the Governor and get that liar McCauley fired!” Tuesday said excitedly.

  Megan was quick to reply to her, “As much as I wish we could, I don’t see how that’s going to solve anything, so no.” She stares at her daughter for a moment, and suddenly Tuesday figures out what her mom is going to propose.

  “Oh no, not that!!” Tuesday protested, shaking her head back and forth. “You can’t be serious?!”

  “Yes, that.” And that was Megan’s final word on the subject.

  “No, no, no, no, no.” Tuesday repeated over and over in a whiney voice. “Oh Mom, gosh no! Not that, anything but that! Why do I have to go to another shrink?”

  Megan felt like it was time to reason with her, and to lay down the law if needs be. “You don’t want to be like this all of your life, do you?”

  Tuesday felt the sting of reason in her mother’s words, but still felt like protesting. “No, but I don’t want to have my head examined anymore, it’s shrink wrapped as it is!”

  Megan cut her off abruptly, “Tuesday, we need to solve this problem, once and for all.” She looked her directly in the eyes, and with a sense of urgency, she said, “It’s important.”

  “But Mom…” Tuesday complained, but Megan wasn’t having it.

  “No, but Mom.” Megan said, making her point clear. “You’re going to the shrink, end of discussion.”

  Tuesday fired a form of a dictatorial salute to her mother as if to indicate that she felt her mother was being a fascist toward her. She couldn’t understand why her mother was being so direct about all of this when she was regularly so disconnected about everything. Why the sudden involvement? Why now? Never mind, it didn’t really matter. “Now she develops parenting skills.” thought Tuesday, frustrated with the morning’s events.

  With her head down, and her spirit crushed, Tuesday walked back to the living room and went out the front door to the porch for some fresh air and to have some time to think. It was then that she spied Jason out on the sidewalk, hoping to get her attention, which elevated her mood considerably.

  “Oh my gosh, there he is.” Tuesday thought to herself, with anxiety gnawing at her. It was right then when he saw her, and he came walking toward her with that intoxicating smile spread across his face.

  II

  A BREATH OF FRESH AIR

  As soon as Jason began moving toward Tuesday, she jumped up to greet him, but what should have taken a few seconds to get together felt like many minutes as the thoughts swirled in her mind. “What if this goes somewhere?” Tuesday thought to herself, engaging in her unfailing ability to overthink everything. “What if this becomes a long-term relationship?”

  Tuesday knew that her problems challenged and plagued her on a daily basis, and she suspected that Jason wouldn’t want to deal with those issues for any extended period of time. And she couldn’t allow herself to hold him back from his future, from his dreams, from his goals. Granted, he was only fifteen and he most likely he wasn’t sure what he wanted to do with his life yet. Maybe he had an idea of what he was going to do, but probably not a concrete plan, and she couldn’t see herself being a part of that plan, whatever it was. This was a conversation she was going to shelve for another time as today wasn’t the day to imagine what her future with him would be. She allowed doubt to creep back into her mind, numbing her to the possibilities of what could happen. The what-ifs seemed to always bring the world into slow motion for Tuesday. Her thoughts were sometimes her own worst enemy, and she knew it.

  When Tuesday and Jason had reached each other, they found themselves in a long hug in the middle of the front yard. Instantly, the anxiety melted away and she found herself caught somewhere in time, in a moment she wished would never end. She wished that the two of them could spend the day talking and hanging out. She longed to hear his voice and peer into those deep blue eyes of his, and hear every single story he had to tell. Tuesday certainly had the time on her hands for it, but it was most unfortunate that he didn’t have that time mutually with her.

  No words were spoken until they parted from their embrace. As they moved apart, they connected their hands, and sat down on the lawn, still gazing into each other’s eyes. Jason took the opportunity to break the silence. “Hey there, I wasn’t sure I was going to see you again so soon, but I was hoping to. I can’t stay long, my Mom and I have to go to Portland today to get some supplies, so she’s going to meet me here.”

  “I’m glad you did.” Tuesday managed to nervously say as she fidgeted with her toe on the wet morning grass. “I guess that’s the benefit of living so close to each other.” It was then that she realized that he must live within a short walking distance to her.

  “I live two blocks down and around the corner on Cedar Court, in the bright blue house.” Jason confirmed, waving his arm off into the general direction of his home. “The really big one, two houses in on the left.”

  “I’ve seen that house.” Tuesday was fumbling for her words, “I know where it’s at.” She was thrilled at the fact he lived so close, but did her best to downplay her enthusiasm.

  “Right.” Jason replied, trying to maintain his cool.

  “It’s great to see you, I was thinking of you all day after I left the school yesterday.” Tuesday admitted, a little unsure of whether she should have said that or not.

  “I have to confess.” Jason began struggling for words that would convey his actions in the correct light, “I came to the bus stop early hoping that I’d see you. How are things going for you?”

  Tuesday felt a little flushed at this revelation. Nobody had ever come to see her before, and it was a feeling that took her by surprise, and she had to admit to herself that it was quite pleasant. She looked at those striking eyes on that tanned face of his, “They’re alright, I guess.” Tuesday replied thinking back to the discussion she and her mother had just finished. “Other than my Mom is making me go to see another shrink, which I don’t want to do.”

  “Well, that stinks.” Jason responded. “You shouldn’t have to go if you don’t want to.”

  “Well, I don’t want to do it.” Tuesday stated, facing the truth about what it was her mother was forcing her to do. “But I need to do it. I can’t live like this anymore, and if this guy can help, I can’t afford to miss the opportunity.”

  “Sounds like you’ve got it sorted then?” Jason said, that smile of his spreading across his face.

  “You know; she has problems too!” Tuesday noted in a moment of thoughtfulness. “It’s not like she couldn’t benefit from some rehabilitation.”

&nbs
p; Suddenly it hit Tuesday what a hypocrite her mother was. Her mother was in serious need of rehab, but wouldn’t do it no matter what Tuesday had tried to tell her. And yet, here she was, forcing another psychologist on Tuesday; it certainly didn’t make any sense to her. Over the years, Tuesday had tried to clean her mother up more than a time or two. She tried to have an intervention but couldn’t get anybody to help her confront her mother for her actions. And then she had threatened to call the police on her mother, but in the end, had only enabled her actions by lying for her. Calling the police wasn’t really an option for her anyway because as terrible as her mother could be, she would rather live with who and what she was, than to live without her. Megan knew this was a ruse, so each time the subject was brought up, she would call Tuesday’s bluff. Tuesday was at her wits end with how to help her mother.

  “It’s simple.” Jason offered, reaching into his pocket, revealing a pack of gum, offering Tuesday a piece. “You recognize that you need help with your problem, and she won’t get help for her problem. Tell her that you won’t go to counseling if she doesn’t go to rehab. Make an ultimatum to her and stick with it.”

  Tuesday brightened up at this idea, reaching out to take the gum Jason was offering her. “I’m definitely bringing that to the table when she and I talk about it again. Probably in like, the next half hour or so, I’m betting. If that long.”

  The two of them shared a laugh, unwrapping the sweet and chewy goodness, placing it into their mouths.

  Tuesday was still thinking about the second of her nightmares from that night, and really wanted to share it with Jason, to perhaps get his perspective on the dream. It was also a way of showing that she could confide in him about personal things.

  “Have you got a minute?” Tuesday asked cautiously, hoping that Jason could talk for a moment longer. “I really want to share something about a dream I had last night with you”

  Jason looked at her and simply shook his head in the affirmative, blowing and popping a bubble as she did so. Tuesday sat him down on the lawn and began to recount the event of the dream to him where she was on the airplane.

  “I was in a passenger airliner.” Tuesday began, trying to remember the vivid details of the dream. “And there was a man with a knife. Everybody was afraid of him, and I could feel their fears and anxieties, but I wasn’t personally afraid. There was a single passenger on the plane who I had a connection to, so I searched the plane for this person, and I caught a glimpse of her right before the plane exploded.”

  “Man, you have the most wicked dreams!!” Jason interrupted, blowing another bubble. “All I ever have are dreams about dogs chasing me, or skateboarding or things like that.”

  “Jason!” Tuesday continued, trying to relay the meaning of her dream to him. “The passenger was me, I’m almost certain of it. What do you think that means?”

  “Well, I’m no shrink.” Jason replied as he shrugged his shoulders, “But I think you may not have been dreaming the future this time. It sounds like one of those deep dreams you have when you’d have that would reveal something about yourself.”

  Tuesday got a puzzled look on her face and thought about what Jason had just told her as he continued to theorize about what had transpired in her dream. “I think you might have been telling yourself that you’re going to be at peace with yourself when your end finally comes.”

  Jason was particularly proud of himself for coming up with this definition to her obviously complex dream. And honestly, Jason thought he was built to be smarter than most kids. His parents always encouraged him to think outside the box, to be independent and to be self-sufficient. Truthfully, Jason wasn’t any smarter than any of the other kids; he was simply taught to think differently than other kids do, which often resulted in different outcomes of the dilemmas that were placed before him.

  He certainly was a more abstract thinker than even a lot of the adults he encountered. It was for this reason that school often bored him and he had a hard time making friends. His thought process worked differently, so he couldn’t appreciate interests in the same way as the other kids. While other boys wanted to play football, he was always the boy who wanted to come up with the plays on paper, and anticipate what the opposing team would do, and counteract that. When Jason had attended Arcadia High School in Phoenix, the Army recruiters were very interested in offering Jason a career, seeing his potential for military applications, combat and strategy. As smart as he was, he had no respect for that kind of discipline, so he often turned down their offers, even though they had fished him with generous scholarships for college. None of their offers meant anything to him, because his heart wasn’t in it.

  The truth was, Jason didn’t truly know what he wanted to do, or how he wanted to apply his talents. He knew that there was nothing that was unattainable for him, but he was careful to think about how he wanted to use those talents. Each decision for Jason was a process where he would have to look at the options from all angles, and then weigh the pros and cons of each decision. He wasn’t one to come to decisions lightly, except for matters of the heart.

  Perhaps this is the reason Jason felt he was so intrigued by Tuesday. Not only was she a riddle wrapped in an enigma, but she was pretty and funny as well. She had an intensity that was attractive to him, and he could feel that she was a real person. Much more so than ninety-nine-point eight percent of the other people he had met in his life. Any girl who still had the guts to carry her teddy bear around at the age of fourteen must be alright in his book. She had a fragile innocence that was close to having been shattered by the experience of the things she had seen, both in her dreams and in real life. The moment he stepped up to the plate for her, scaring the Jackson girls away, he knew that he had to know more about her. Meeting her was like being hit by lightning and nobody was going to keep him from her. In his heart, he knew that she was the one he had been waiting for.

  Jason had dated one or two girls back in Phoenix, but they just weren’t right for him. They were shallow and were more concerned with how their boyfriend looked, or what his social stature was than the actual relationship. He knew the next time he chose a girl; she was going to have to be very special.

  He was very much hoping that a solid relationship could come out of this thing with Tuesday, but the last thing he wanted to do was push her. He was never very good at reading girls to know whether they were truly interested or not, but he had a good feeling about Tuesday. He just wanted to make sure the time was right before asking her out, as not to go too fast for her. Jason was, if nothing else, a gentleman. This was a trait unheard of in the vast majority of boys his age.

  “Let me clarify.” Tuesday asked, somewhat bewildered at Jason’s revelation. “I’m going to be at peace with myself when I die?”

  “That’s what I’m thinking it means.” Jason responded, and then got a mischievous grin on his face. “If I were you, I’d ask the shrink your Mom is making you see to be sure.”

  Tuesday playfully slugged him and rolled her eyes, and the two laughed again. “It feels good to laugh with somebody.” Tuesday thought to herself, feeling a relief wash over her. She was thinking about how she wished she could spend more time with him, so much so in fact, that she had vocalized that thought without realizing it. “I really wish we could spend more time together like this.”

  “I certainly wouldn’t mind that.” Jason replied, with that smirk on his face. “I’m going to the football game next Friday; would you like to go with me?”

  Tuesday brightened up at the invitation, even though she wasn’t a fan of the sport and certainly didn’t want any part of the whole school spirit thing. “Yes!” Tuesday blurted out without giving it a second thought. “I’d love to go to the game with you!”

  “Alright.” Jason said, smiling graciously at Tuesday. “It’s a date.”

  “A date?” Tuesday hadn’t quite thought about it in those terms, but in essence, that’s what it
well and truly was. She never would have imagined that her first date would be a high school football game. In fact, she never thought she would ever go on a date with somebody in Cadence Falls. The perception that the people in the town had of her, largely due to the endless amount of gossip spread by the Jackson girls, was not a favorable impression. They had tarnished her reputation beyond any hope of repair, so meeting a friend, much less a boy, was completely out of the realm of probability for Tuesday. Yet, against all odds, here was this new boy, completely unaffected by the lip service of the Jackson Twins, and she was beginning to feel like a normal teenage girl for the first time in her life. She dared to hope that this would be real and lasting, and that even if nothing romantically ever came of it, Jason would hold true to his promise, and that they would remain friends, no matter what.

  It was at that moment that a car pulled up in front of Tuesday’s house and sounded its horn. It was Jason’s mother, swinging by to pick him up for their trip to Portland. Jason jumped to his feet, and offered her his hand, and helped her to her feet. He gave her a quick hug, that didn’t feel like nearly enough to hold her over, and then ran over and hopped in the car. He took a seat and kept looking at her until their car moved out of sight.

  Tuesday stood on her lawn, living in the moment and wishing that she and Jason could have many more like the one they had just shared. The rain began to fall, and Tuesday decided it was time to go back into the house and deal with the issue of seeing the therapist. She was not looking forward to continuing that conversation.

  III

  MEGAN’S JOURNEY

  Tuesday stood on the lawn for another fifteen minutes after the school bus left. She replayed the entire conversation with Jason over and over again in her mind, wondering what she could have done or said differently. In the end, she decided that the situation was acceptable as it was, and was a perfect slice of her day. But it was time to get back down to business. She was particularly interested in playing the ultimatum card with her mother. It was time that her mother laid her demons to rest too, in fact, it was long overdue. She turned and slowly walked back to the house, twice looking back at the spot where she and Jason had been sitting together on the lawn and smiled a little wider each time.

  She opened the door, expecting some kind teasing from her mother, who surely had to have seen her and Jason together. At the moment, she didn’t even care what her mother was going to say. She closed the front door behind her gently, and almost danced herself back into the kitchen, but Megan wasn’t there. Tuesday went into the laundry room to check and see if her she had been working on the laundry, but she wasn’t there either. She was used to her mom leaving the house without telling her, but surely this couldn’t have been one of those times since they were still in the process of figuring out what to do about Tuesday’s recent expulsion from school.

  Tuesday decided to go into the darkened living room to watch some morning television, and that was when she saw her mother. She was unconscious on the floor, with a band of rubber loose on the floor and a syringe still sticking into her track marked arm. The spoon and the butane lighter rested a few feet from her mother’s body, the acrid residue still clinging to the air.

  Tuesday’s eyes went wide with fright. She ran across the room and knelt down in front of her mother. “Please don’t have overdosed!” She thought to herself in a panic, placing her hand on her mother’s chest. At first, she didn’t detect any rise or fall in her chest, which threw Tuesday into full blown panic mode. She placed the side of her hand up under her nose and felt very faint and shallow breathing. She then placed her fingers on the side of her neck and found an irregular pulse, so she decided the best course of action was to call 911. She fumbled in the dim light of the living room for the phone, removing it from its cradle and pushed the three digits. It rang through and was answered immediately.

  “911 dispatch, what is your emergency?” The female voice on the other end asked.

  Tuesday thought for a moment, and then said “Medical, I think my Mom overdosed!” At the sound of hearing the actual words coming out of her mouth, Tuesday broke down and began crying, but she managed to give the dispatcher her address and phone number while she stayed on the line.

  The dispatcher was asking for details about what her mother could have overdosed on, and she played the part of the innocent daughter, claiming not to know anything about the substances because she didn’t want to give them enough information to have her Mom arrested. While on the phone, Tuesday carefully removed the syringe from her mother’s arm, bent the needle on the floor and then placed it into a bottle of soda that been sitting next to the couch. The dark color of the soda hid the syringe from sight. She picked up the rubber band, lighter and spoon and took them into the kitchen, furiously trying to scrub the dark, syrupy heroin residue from the spoon with hot, soapy water. She began to hear sirens in the distance, so she grabbed a zip lock bag and shoved the spoon, the lighter, and the rubber band into it, and hid the bag in the can of coffee grounds, covering it up and placing the lid back on it. The sirens continued to grow louder and soon the EMTs arrived, pounding feverishly at the door.

  Tuesday answered the door, and the medical crew came in swiftly, bringing their gear, a gurney, and various other things that Tuesday couldn’t describe. It wasn’t long before they decided they needed to transport her to the hospital for intensive care. As soon as they picked Megan up, Tuesday began asking questions.

  “Where are you taking her?” Tuesday asked in a panic. “Is she going to be alright?”

  “We are taking her to the hospital, she’s going to be fine. You’re going to need to come with us, and we’ll have some questions for you.” The EMT said in a calm manner.

  The entire event was a whirlwind, and hit had happened so fast. One minute her mother was lecturing her about seeing a shrink, and a little later she was laid out on the floor, incapacitated. “How had this happened?”

  It wasn’t long before they had Megan on the gurney and was wheeling her outside to the ambulance. Tuesday was curious how she was going to get to the hospital. It was only a second later that she got her answer.

  “You’re going to ride with me, Tuesday.” Officer Douglas Downe said. “I’ll take you to the hospital, and I’m going to have some questions as well.”

  Tuesday wondered what else was about to go wrong for the day. She glanced over and saw the EMT crew place the gurney inside of the ambulance and closed the door as the rain intensified outside. Tuesday went inside and grabbed Winston, locked the house up, and then turned and followed the police officer to his car.