Finding Somewhere to Belong

by C. C. Masters

  “How do you change into a wolf?” Mason prodded gently. “It’s not a physical change, your bones don’t break, your tendons don’t snap, your blood doesn’t spray everywhere. If your body had to physically rearrange itself to a wolf form, you would bleed to death before you got very far in the change.”

  I thought about that for a moment. He was right; one moment I was human, and the next I was a wolf. It was a seamless, painless transition.

  “It’s magic,” Jason told me seriously.

  “Magic is just science we don’t fully understand yet,” I told them stubbornly.

  “That’s what I said. It’s magic,” Jason insisted.

  I didn’t have a better explanation, so I just nodded.

  “How does it work?” I asked curiously. “Can you just hear each other’s thoughts?”

  Mason laughed. “No, you have to project your thoughts to someone, and they have to let you in. It’s a little bit different for Jason and I,” he continued. “We have been able to share our thoughts since we were born.”

  “Austin thinks it’s because we shared blood in the womb, like in the bonding ritual.”

  Mason nodded, agreeing with his brother. “For everyone else, it takes a conscious effort. You have to reach out and make contact with who you want to speak with and then try to project a clear, concise thought or emotion.”

  “It can be really difficult for some wolves who didn’t grow up in a pack that used those abilities,” Jason told me sympathetically.

  “But it’s really useful to be able to speak to each other while in wolf form,” Mason added.

  “So, what’s the bonding ritual?” I asked.

  “It’s a ceremony,” Mason started.

  Jason nodded. “You exchange blood with each of the other pack members, and the pack-master draws you into a bond together.”

  “So, when do I do that?” I questioned.

  The twins looked at each other.

  Jason looked uncomfortable, and Mason shrugged. “Whenever Austin thinks you’re ready and the pack is ready to accept you.”

  “He might just have you bond with a couple people first,” Jason told me.

  Mason nodded. “That way, it won’t be too overwhelming for you and you can practice with the people you feel comfortable with.”

  “That makes sense,” I said thoughtfully.

  “If he asks, make sure to tell him you want to bond with us first,” Jason kidded.

  Mason’s eyes lit up. “Yeah! We should definitely be first since we are your designated wolf tutors,” he said enthusiastically.

  I laughed. “I’ll definitely be asking him about this pack-bonding thing next time I see him. I want to be psychic with the rest of you.”

  Kelsey texted me back: Be there in an hour.

  “I’ll race you upstairs!” I shouted, taking advantage of their surprise to get a head start.

  Chapter 17

  After my shower, I got dressed in yoga pants and a hoodie. I was done dressing nice for today. I put my hair up in a ponytail, and I was ready for whatever happened next.

  I bounced downstairs to spy out the front and wait for Kelsey to bring my little pups. I needed some puppy kisses and affection after the last couple days I had. I glanced at my phone; it had not been an hour yet and there was no sign of her outside, so I headed to the kitchen for some more water and a snack.

  It looked like some of the other pack members had finished off the fruit salad I made the other day, so I opted for an apple. I surveyed what was left of the food that I had thought would last the rest of the week.

  All the sandwich meats and cheeses were gone, the chicken and ground beef was gone. The meat I had bought for the pot roast was still there, probably because it would have taken too long for the boys to cook.

  I smirked; it looked like we were having pot roast for dinner tonight. It also looked like I was going to have to send the boys out for another grocery stop tonight if we wanted breakfast tomorrow. Having 20-30 grown wolves traipsing through the house really took a toll on the food stores. I idly wondered just how much Austin spent feeding his pack.

  I sat at the counter and started working on another food order while I crunched on my apple.

  “Hey, Anna,” Caleb gave me a friendly smile as he headed to the fridge. He peered in to see what was left and seemed almost as disappointed as I had with the selection.

  “I’m ordering some more groceries now,” I told Caleb. “Any special requests?”

  “Pop-Tarts?” he asked hopefully.

  I gave him an amused smile.

  “What?” he asked. “Pop-Tarts are good.”

  “Oh, I agree,” I told him. “It’s just not what I expected from a fierce wolf.”

  He blushed and sat at the counter next to me, peering over my shoulder as I searched for pop tarts.

  “Oh, get s’mores!” he told me.

  I chuckled. “Okay, but the frosted cherry with sprinkles are the best.”

  “No way! Chocolate fudge are way better!”

  I laughed, but I ordered him some chocolate fudge Pop-Tarts, along with the s’mores. “Don’t forget to hide them somewhere for me,” he said seriously. “Otherwise, the twins will eat the entire box and leave the wrappers in the box on the shelf just to taunt me.” I couldn’t help but laugh; that seemed like exactly something they would do.

  “Tell you what, I’ll plant some decoy Pop-Tarts in the pantry and give you yours to hide.”

  Caleb laughed and leaned in close to me. “You’re devious; I like it.” His low voice got the butterflies in my tummy moving. I gazed into his warm brown eyes to see a mischievous glint there.

  “What kind of dinner foods do you like?” I asked him.

  We talked about food for a while, and I managed to get a lot of his likes and dislikes down for future meal planning. I suddenly realized it had been a while since I had heard a peep from the twins. I had the feeling that was not a good thing. Caleb had already gone back upstairs, so I went to look for the two troublemakers.

  I headed for the front door to see if Kelsey had gotten here. I had been expecting an ‘I’m here’ text from her, but that had never come, and it had been well over an hour now.

  I was lucky I had checked. I peeked through the front door to see that Kelsey was here and outside. She was currently facing off with the twins, and James was heading toward the group from around the back of the house. I hurried outside to try and smooth over what was sure to be an awkward and tense situation.

  When I got closer, I heard the pups barking their ‘Hey, did you forget me?’ barks from inside Kelsey’s car.

  “Kelsey!” I shouted in welcome.

  She didn’t take her eyes off the twins. “You need to call off your guard dogs,” she told me.

  I tried not to laugh out loud. If she only knew, I thought to myself.

  “I was worried about you. I’m so glad you’re here!” I exclaimed. She looked mollified as she turned towards me.

  James walked up to the group. “Anna, go inside. I need to talk to your friend.”

  I simply raised an eyebrow, but Jason snorted. Mason mumbled under his breath.

  I ignored James. “I can get the puppies, Kelsey. Do you have a bunch of their stuff with you?”

  Kelsey nodded. “I brought their bed and food and stuff. I already know you wouldn’t use the kennel, though.”

  “You keep your dogs in a cage?” Jason asked, horrified.

  “They like their kennel,” Kelsey told him defensively.

  Jason looked like he was going to explode. I stepped in quickly. “Kelsey keeps their kennel door open most of the time, so they can go in and out when they please. They usually go in there when they want to nap because it’s quiet and private, like a den.”

  Jason seemed soothed by that. Mason was still glaring at Kelsey.

  “I need to ask you some questions,” James told Kelsey.

  This was not going well. James was acting like his normal irritable self.
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br />   The front door opened, and Austin stepped out. I groaned internally; this was about to get even worse. As Austin walked over, Kelsey primped her hair a little bit. “I could use some help getting everything out of my car.”

  “Okay,” I said and started to walk over to the car.

  “Not you, Anna,” Kelsey told me as she smiled at James.

  Was she flirting with James? I stared in disbelief. I guess he would be good looking if he wasn’t a complete ass, but this was James we were talking about.

  Kelsey’s smile got even brighter as Austin reached our group and she tossed her hair. I groaned out loud this time, and the guys glanced at me before all turning their attention back to Kelsey.

  Austin smiled at her. “You must be Anna’s friend. I’m Austin.”

  “Ohhh,” she purred. “The two over there mentioned you’re the one who owns the house.” She waved a hand toward the twins.

  I blinked. It had not occurred to me before, but Austin was exactly Kelsey’s usual type. He was wealthy and good looking, and he was more good looking than any of the other guys I had seen Kelsey with. I sighed. I’m not sure how I would feel about that, Kelsey dating my pack-master.

  I felt a little twinge of jealousy and was surprised by it; did I have a crush on Austin? Sure, he was insanely hot, but he was my pack-master. He had offered to be your pretend mate, a little voice whispered from inside me.

  I pushed the voice away. Any tiny chance I had of Austin ever being interested in me would have quickly disappeared when he met Kelsey. I was invisible to men when I was next to her.

  To my complete shock, Austin turned away from her to take my hand in his. He turned back to her as he ran his thumb gently over my wrist. “Anna mentioned you needed her to babysit?” Austin asked.

  Kelsey looked down at our clasped hands and frowned before taking a step closer to him. She turned the wattage of her smile up and twirled a finger in her hair. “Oh yes, Anna is a very good friend of mine. I can always count on her to watch my dogs or help with my housework. Isn’t that right, Anna?”

  I had no idea what point she was trying to make, so I just agreed. “Um, yeah.”

  I tried to pull my hand away from Austin, but he held on a little tighter. “Would it be okay if James and I asked you some questions?” he asked Kelsey. “We are worried about you after what Anna said happened at your house.”

  “Oh, yeah,” Kelsey said. “Anna totally set me up and then went into hiding.”

  I opened my mouth to disagree, but Austin squeezed my hand. “Don’t worry,” he told Kelsey. “We’ll take care of Anna.”

  “Anna,” he turned to me, “why don’t you see if you can get the pups settled in?”

  I nodded and walked over to get them out of the car. They barked excitedly as I approached, and they were wagging their tails full force. I smiled at how ridiculously cute they were. I open the car door so they could jump out. They were jumping up and down at my feet, so I knelt to give them pets and attention.

  They responded affectionately with kisses. “Oh, my sweet babies, I missed you so much!” I told them in the high voice I reserved just for them. I heard snickering behind me and glanced back to see all the guys laughing at me. Even James had a smile on his face. Kelsey had an irritated frown.

  “Mason, Jason, why don’t you help Anna get the things from inside from the car?” Austin suggested.

  “You two have rhyming names?” Kelsey asked. “Isn’t that a bit too much?” she asked mockingly.

  “Hey -” I started to say with a growl.

  “Anna,” Austin interrupted me with a smile. “Why don’t you go show the twins where you want the stuff?”

  I fumed, but I trusted Austin. “All right?” I grumbled, but I stood and called for the puppies to follow me. They ran after me without even a glance at Kelsey – not that she noticed; she was much too busy gearing up for a major flirt session. The twins grabbed all the puppy accessories out of the car, and we walked back inside.

  As soon as the door closed behind us, I whirled around to face them. “Why did Austin call me off like that?” I asked angrily.

  Mason shifted the dog bed under the same arm he was using to carry a bag so he could wrap his now free arm around me. “Awwww, Anna, are you defending our honor?”

  “Maybe,” I grumbled prickly.

  Jason laughed at me. “Awww, Anna, it’s okay. We know you are a fearsome little wolf who would have ripped that mean girl to shreds for us.”

  I punched him in the arm, and he just laughed harder. Mason mussed my hair. “We love you, too.”

  I gave him a pretend glare, but a sense of warmth and belonging filled me. They loved me? A dopey grin spread over my face. The pups were dancing around the twins, trying to get some attention. “Be careful, guys,” I warned them. I didn’t want anyone to get trampled or tripped.

  We set down the stuff in the living room, and when Jason got down on the floor to play with the puppies, they were overjoyed. I dug through the bag Kelsey had packed; she had food and treats and their brushes, but none of their toys. “Your mom forgot to pack your toys,” I told them sadly. They watched me and tilted their heads. I know they recognized the word toy, but my sad tone of voice was throwing them off.

  Jason jumped up. “I have tennis balls!” He ran out to the garage. Tennis balls were going to be way too big for them to fit in their little mouths, but Jason was too quick for me to stop him. It warmed my heart to see how sweet he was with them.

  Eeyore starting sniffing around the floor, looking for a good spot, so I hurriedly scooped him up and ran outside. I sat him down in the grass, and he happily started sniffing there before taking a leak. Mason followed me with Tigger and set him down in the grass next to his brother, chuckling.

  I looked at Mason curiously. “So, what was with Jason’s reaction to the cage? It seemed like more than just not liking the idea.”

  Mason cleared his throat. “Yeah, I should probably tell you…make sure you never, ever cage an animal around him.”

  “Can I ask why?” I said softly.

  Mason looked uncomfortable. “When we were kids, we were kind of…a lot for our mom to handle.”

  I nodded. I could see that.

  “Sometimes when we just got to be too much, she would put us in a cage and leave us there. Sometimes for the rest of the day and through the night. No food, no water, no bathroom breaks.”

  My jaw dropped. “What?”

  “Yeah. Jason would panic because when you’re a young pup, that length of time seems like an eternity. We never really knew when we were going to be let out. I think sometimes he was afraid no one would ever come for us.”

  “Oh my God…” I was horrified. Who would do that to their children?

  I gave his hand a squeeze. “I can’t believe anyone would do that to you. Wasn’t she at least afraid of someone calling the police?” My uncle had done a lot to me, but he had been limited by the fear that someone would find out.

  Mason shook his head no. “She would leave us in our wolf form. No one would even blink at her keeping two puppies in a kennel.”

  “In your wolf form?” I frowned. “How old were you?”

  “Oh, ever since I could remember,” he told me.

  “How could you change that young? I didn’t change until I was 10.”

  Jason picked that moment to run out of the house with a handful of tennis balls. Mason shot me a warning look, and the meaning was clear: don’t tell Jason that I told you. I nodded and gave his hand another squeeze.

  The puppies ran after Jason and the balls; they were way too big for them to do anything but nudge them with their noses. I laughed, but Jason looked disappointed. He trotted over to where Mason and I were standing.

  “What are you guys talking about?” he asked.

  “Mason was just telling me about wolf puppies,” I told him. Jason looked at Mason in shock, but Mason just shrugged. “She might decide to have pups one day.”

  “Huh.” Jason lo
oked too surprised for words, so I turned back to Mason. “So, when can kids start turning into a wolf?” I asked curiously.

  “Oh, kids can’t turn themselves back and forth.” Jason laughed. “Can you imagine the chaos? How would you keep them from changing in preschool?”

  I just looked at him. “So…?” I asked him with a raised eyebrow.

  “A parent or a high-ranking member in the pack can help with the change or even force the change on you if you are injured or unconscious,” Mason told me.

  “That makes sense, I guess.”

  “Eventually, kids can change on their own once they are old enough and understand how it works.”

  “I changed without knowing what I was,” I told them slowly. “How could I have done that?”

  They looked at each other. “I’ve heard the first independent change can be triggered by fear,” Mason told me.

  “Yeah, like you want to escape something so badly that your body responds by changing,” Jason added.

  I nodded, deep in thought. That definitely made sense. The night I changed, I was afraid for my life and desperate to get away.

  The twins were watching me expectantly, I think because they wanted me to share the whole story with them. I was not ready to talk about it, so I tried to change the topic.

  “Most of our food is gone,” I told them. “I started another order, but I wanted to check with you guys to see if you could pick it up before I placed the order.” Both guys groaned in response.

  “I put bacon, chips, and sandwich stuff on there. Plus, we can get the puppies some toys,” I tried to entice them.

  “We just have to pick it up, right?” Jason asked.

  “Yeah, I’ll even start making dinner without you.” I was trying bribery now. “And brownies for dessert,” I added.

  “Deal!” Jason yelled out.

  Chapter 18

  A little bit later that day, I was left alone in the kitchen. I had sent the guys off to get the groceries and corralled the puppies into one area of the kitchen where I could keep an eye on them. I hummed as I prepared the pot roast. I needed to hurry up and get this in the oven ASAP if we wanted to eat at a decent time tonight. It was going to take about three and a half hours to cook.