“You lied to me” Jared snarls, gripping my chin between his finger and thumb, forcing me to look at him. “To lie is a sin Louisa. And sinners must be punished.” His fingers wrap tightly around my throat, squeezing harder and harder until black shadows edge into my vision and then he releases me just as I drift on the edge unconsciousness. I blink away the haze, my eyes refocusing on his face as it tilts from side to side.
“If you’re going to kill me…” I rasp, my throat raw and bruised, “just get it over with.” He laughs, a sickening, wicked laugh that makes my blood run cold.
“That would be far too easy. I’m going to enjoy every second of this and by the time I’ve finished, you’ll wish you’d never been born.” His hands tear at my dress, the fabric shredding beneath his manic grip and I thrash, screaming as I try to fight him off, pain slicing into my skin as the back of his hand connects with my cheek. My eye feels like its exploded but I don’t stop. I kick and scream louder and louder until my throat is raw and my chest burns.
He looms over me, cheek against cheek as he snarls in my ear. “Nobody is coming to save you. You are mine now. This body is mine. Your very soul is mine.” he laughs, dark and dangerous, lips inches from my ear. “You are my plaything and I will not be gentle.”
The doors crash open, slamming against the walls. Jared dives, reaching for the knife, pressing it against my throat as he turns towards the intruder. My eyes widen with a relief like nothing I’ve ever felt when they find Sam, chest heaving with rage as he points his rifle across the room.
“Let. Her. Go.” His eyes find mine briefly and I pour every apology into my gaze. Jared places me between us, the rifle now pointing at my face and Sam’s finger twitches away from the trigger. “Let her go Jared.”
“Or what? You’re going to pull the trigger? I don’t think so. You wouldn’t have come back here just to shoot her.” The blade nicks the delicate skin of my throat and Sam’s eyes widen as warm blood leaks down my neck. The pain is nothing compared to the fierce regret that burns in my chest.
“Sam, I’m so sorry” I whisper, flinching as Jared’s grip on me tightens. Sam readjusts his hold on the gun, tension bunching his broad shoulders as he shifts, trying to find a gap to shoot.
“So, this is the one? I did wonder which of the men had caught your eye. I guessed the blonde but it seems mister tall, dark and handsome is more your type.” I wince against the blade. “Well, Sam,” he spits his name as if it is bitter on his tongue. “Walk out that door and you can live with the knowledge that I kept her alive. That she lives and breathes in the world still. Or you can pull that trigger and see which of us is quicker. I’ll cut her throat and you will watch her die. If I can’t have her, no-one can.”
“I’m not going anywhere without you.” His words light a fire in my gut, sparking to life the fire in me that has been there all along. “Let her go Jared and you can spend the rest of your miserable existence still breathing.”
Jared laughs, a sinister, maniacal sound that makes my blood run cold and my chest blaze with hatred. I meet Sam’s gaze, imploring with my eyes, hoping that he can suddenly read my mind.
Be ready.
I yank my arm upwards, gripping the serrated edge of the blade, forcing it from my throat as it slices into my palm. A scream tears from my lips as I wrench from his grip, ducking out of the way as Sam fires. There’s a thud as I throw myself from the bed, my dress in tatters as I sprint across the room. Sam fires again, cursing as he reloads, backing away as I race past him. His boots slam against the ground, his hands shoving against my back, spurring me onwards. Blood trails from my fingers, smearing the walls as I catch myself, skidding at the top of the stairs. A feral roar whips my head around but Sam is pushing me, forcing me down the stairs as we run for the door.
Plaster explodes above my head and I duck, hands flying up to protect myself as I sprint through the open door. Sam is at my back, yelling my name, telling me to keep running. Over my shoulder I see Jared, blood cascading down his face, my knife clenched in his angered grip, a handgun in the other as he fires after us. Doors open all around us, guards barrelling out of the darkness, guns held aloft.
“Don’t look back. Go” Sam yells, firing blind behind him as we reach the manhole cover. I drop into it without hesitation, water spraying up my legs as I land, my ankle tilting awkwardly. Sam steadies me with strong hands as he drops down beside me. Then we’re running again, splashing through ankle deep water as the yells and shouts of the village fade into the distance. Nobody follows us into the sewers and for that, I am eternally grateful. Maybe Rebecca was right, maybe he doesn’t know it’s there.
After ten minutes, I slow to a walk, my ankle throbbing and the cut at my throat stinging. I lift a hand, see the blood that coats my palm and hold back a retch. Stopping I rip some of the shredded material from my dress, winding it around my palm to curb the bleeding. Sam doesn’t speak. I’ll be amazed if he ever speaks to me again but the fact that he came back for me means more than he’ll ever know.
“Sam?” I hear his breath catch, hear him swallow. “Sam please?” I stop walking, grope in the darkness until my hand find his. His fingers are limp in my grip and tears burns my eyes. “I’m sorry.”
He sighs. “Let just get to the others. We can talk about this later.”
A tear leaks down my cheek, followed by another. “Can we?”
He doesn’t answer, slipping his fingers from mine, water crashing beneath his feet as he walks. Exhaling slowly, I begin to follow. My chest is heavy, as if someone has torn out my heart and replaced it with stone. It breaks at the thought of him hating me.
The sewers seem to go on forever, that darkness pressing against my eyes and I fear we may never escape. And then there’s shouting, voices calling our names as the first hints of dawn illuminates the way ahead. The relief is overwhelming, spurring me onwards, forcing me to move faster as the need for fresh air beats at my lungs. Sam grips the rungs of a ladder, climbing to the surface as I wait, staring up at him with nothing but regret. I failed in my quest and now I will have to suffer the consequences of my decisions.
Sam disappears above ground and I grab the rungs of the ladder, hissing at the fire that burns in my palm. I start to climb as an arm reaches down into the hole, hand outstretched. I grasp it, let it heave me from the ground and into warm arms that crush me. I press my face into Drew’s neck, let the tears finally fall as my body quakes in his embrace. He whispers soothing words in my ear, pure affection washing the filth of that monster from my skin.
“You are so brave Louisa. So brave.” He mutters, his chest shaking beneath my palms. I don’t feel brave. Right now, I feel fragmented and damaged, my weary soul shattering into a million pieces as I think of the ones I couldn’t save from him.
When I think of how I failed.
“We need to go before they come looking for us” Sam interrupts our embrace with a hand on my shoulder, searching my face as I turn away, wiping the tears from my cheeks. Dog bounces around my feet, completely oblivious yet happy to see me all the same. Natalie pulls me into a relieved hug, whispering all manner of insults that I know she doesn’t really mean.
Kyle pulls me towards him, tearing me from Natalie to wrap his arms around me, shoulders heaving. “I’m glad you’re okay Lou.”
“Thank you, Ky,” I pull away, offer him a smile that doesn’t quite stick.
Rebecca, steps forward, eyes filled with questions. I shake my head. “I’m sorry Becky. I failed.” She shakes her head, wrapping her arms around me.
“It doesn’t matter. You saved me Louisa. I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to thank you for that.” I hug her tighter, loving her for her understanding and her forgiveness despite all the promises that I couldn’t keep.
The group sets off, leaving Sam and I standing alone, eyes on their retreating backs. When I turn to look at him I feel my soul repair a little under his stare, as if his very existence can put me back together. Mend the broken parts of me t
hat lay in tatters at my feet. Cupping my cheeks his mouth covers mine. Its desperate, filled with fear and passion, his emotions burrowing into my soul until we are one flesh, until I am him and he is me.
“Don’t ever do that to me again” he whispers against my lips, eyes closed and pinched with anxiety. I rest my forehead gently against his, allow my own eyes to close, listen to the rhythm of our breathing as our hearts beat in unison.
“I won’t.”
Twenty
- The Road Ahead –
The heat of the fire scorches my skin but I don’t move, needing to feel the burn, to sear away the memory of that monster’s touch. To lance it like a boil. Pulling my knees up to my chest I stare into the flames without really seeing them. Instead images play over and over in my head, a never-ending loop that doesn’t stop even when I close my eyes. If Sam hadn’t have made it there when he did, I know I would be changed beyond all recognition.
There are some fates worse than death.
I have seen the depravity of this world. The corruption of humanity never fails to surprise me. The horror that has unfolded, the death and destruction we wrought upon each other all for the sake of power. Fighting for control that we will never have again. That we never really had to begin with. I have seen men perform evil acts, things that even now make my skin crawl with the injustice and the degeneration of a race that was never meant to survive.
Yet, against all odds, we did survive and amid all that wickedness I have also seen the goodness in others. Love and devotion, loyalty and friendship and I hold onto that now as my gaze drifts across the campfire, watching Dog bounce back and forth with excitement. Hear Rebecca laugh at Kyle’s jokes, see her smiling like a teenage girl should and I am reminded why I did what I did. Why I risked everything. To make sure that that beast would never hurt anyone again.
My failure is like a knife to the gut.
Despite everything, it is friendship that will carry me through to the end, and I grasp onto that, knowing that it could slip away at any second like grains of sand through my fingers. As I sit, warmed by the fire and listening to the quiet chatter of my friends, I know that the road ahead will be a long one, but if we have each other, we are indestructible.
“How are you doing?” Drew drops beside me, exhaustion like thick bruises beneath his eyes but a smile on his face all the same. I return it, though its half-hearted. He sighs, dropping his arm around my shoulders and tugging me into an embrace that has pulled me back from the brink more than once. “You know, that letter you wrote…was I supposed to believe that?”
I elbow him in the ribs but it only makes his arm tighten, a laugh blowing from his lips. “Come on Louisa, I may not be a genius but even I knew that that was a crock of shit. There’s no way you could live without me.”
“Is that so?” I straighten so I can see his face. He’s grinning but I see the hurt I knew my choices would inevitably cause. I drop my gaze to my fingers, searching for the words to make him understand. “Drew, I need you to know it wasn’t because I didn’t trust you.”
“Really? Then what was it?” I lift my head.
“I did it to protect you. From the moment we met, you’ve spent every day trying to keep me safe. You’ve risked your life more than once to keep me alive and I didn’t want you to do it again.” His mouth opens in protest but I interrupt. “Please, just, let me finish. You are my family and I love you, so much, but you can’t protect me forever and you shouldn’t have to.”
“But Louisa, it’s my job to take care of you.”
I smile, resting my palm against his stubbled jaw. “No, it’s not. We’re a team which means we take care of each other. I know that who you are is a protector, you can’t help it, but there may come a time when you’re not there to watch over me and I have to be able to do this by myself.”
“So, what you’re saying is back off and let me take care of myself?” It’s an entirely new concept for Drew, one that makes him uncomfortable. He turns his attention to the fire, lips moving silently. When he finally turns back to me his normally smiling face is serious as he takes my bandaged hand in his, throat bobbing as he too searches for the right words.
“I will always protect you. You are my family and I would risk my life for you in a heartbeat but the same goes for every person around this campfire. You’re right, I am a protector. It’s in my bones and I can’t change that but I understand that babying you in a world like this isn’t going to do you any good either.” He swallows, “So from now on I’m going to make sure you can protect yourself. No more babysitting. I’ll make a warrior out of you yet.”
I grin, “I’d like that.”
A throat clears and we turn together, see Sam standing over us with that intense gaze that makes my mouth dry and my heart hammer in my chest. Drew lets go of my hand, staring up at Sam with a look I’ve never seen on his face before.
“Mind if I steal my girlfriend away?” I blanch at Sam’s words, turning to Drew with wide eyes. Smirking, Drew shakes his head and climbs to his feet, clapping Sam on the shoulder before turning back to me.
“Oh please, do you really think I’m that oblivious?” I’m still open mouthed, silently answering his question. “Come on, I noticed the goo-goo eyes and the way you two snuck off for an entire night. I’m insulted that you think I’m that stupid.” Sam smirks and I shove at his thigh, that irksome flush creeping in beneath Drew’s amused stare. “I have to say Lou, I didn’t know you had it in you. Good job.”
He makes to high five me and I raise an eyebrow. With a grin, he drops his hands and shrugs, turning to Sam and saying in the most big brotherly way possible. “You take good care of her or you’ll have me to deal with.”
Sam salutes, his smirk replaced with absolute sincerity. “Yes sir.” They clasp hands, patting each other in a very manly fashion on the back and then Drew leaves, crossing the fire to sit beside Natalie. Speaking of goo-goo eyes. Sam steps into my line of sight, hand outstretched. Rolling my eyes, I take it, letting him pull me to my feet as he slips an arm around my shoulders and guides me just out of earshot of camp.
We walk in companionable silence beneath the moon as its burnished glow lights our path. I glance back, see Rebecca grinning, eyes never straying from Kyle’s handsome face as they walk. See Natalie and Drew, their stolen glances, the way their hands lightly brush one another’s when they think nobody is looking. I don’t how our existence on this earth came to be, whether it was creation by a higher power or an accidental collision of atoms millions of years ago; it doesn’t matter. Whatever the point of it all was, this is what it means to be human. Finding someone to share our lives with and holding on tight, never letting them go, placing absolute trust in another soul and allowing them to do the same.
Sam moves behind me, covering my eyes with his hands. I giggle, lifting my palms to cover his, my footsteps shaky as a result of my sudden blindness. I hear Sam’s breathy chuckle by my ear as he starts walking, guiding my steps as we reach an incline, my thighs burning the higher we go.
“Sam, where are we going?” I laugh, stumbling as I try not trip over my own feet.
“It’s a surprise” he whispers, warm breath against my ear sending a delicious shiver down my spine. I huff, trying to mask my smile but it sticks as the ground levels out. I jerk to a stop, the anticipation killing me. “I thought you’d want to see this.”
His hands fall away. I blink furiously to clear my vision and my breath catches in my chest as I gaze in wonder at the scene below.
“Ohmygod” I breathe.
A herd of wild horses gallop in the valley below, manes shimmering in the moonlight as they canter playfully, darting back and forth with muscles rippling beneath glowing skin. I laugh as they throw their heads back in a whinny, resplendent in their movements as powerful hooves beat like war drums against the earth at their feet.
“I’ve never seen anything so beautiful…” I whisper, the moment too precious to taint.
“Me neither” I
turn to him, find him staring at me.
I smile. “You’re missing it.”
“No, I’m not. Not anymore.” The breeze lifts my hair and he captures a stray tendril, tucking it behind my ear as he turns me to face him.
“Sam, I…”
“Don’t ever leave me like that again.” The intensity of his gaze lowers my eyes, shame colouring my cheeks. He’s not letting me get away that easy though and he forces my face back up. “When I heard you screaming I thought I wasn’t going to get there in time and that…it nearly killed me. I need you now, more than you can ever begin to imagine.”
I don’t speak, my throat thick with emotion as I realise what I put him through, what I put us both through, what we very nearly lost because of it.
“Louisa, whatever this is between us, I’m all in. For better or worse, this is it.” I hold my breath, recognising the sensation in my chest but too afraid to speak it aloud. The way my heart swells in his presence, responding to him without conscious thought, knowing beyond all reasonable doubt that I too am all in.
My breath catches as he pulls my lips to his. We stand there under the moon and stars, falling into each other, the parts of him and the parts of me fitting together perfectly. As if we were made for each other. Two halves of one soul.
“Woah” Kyle gasps. We part, find him staring wide eyed into the valley below. “Becky come on, you gotta see this.” He grabs her hand, dragging her up the hill, the sound of his excitement so infectious it pulls my lips into a wide smile. Sam smirks, tucking me into his side, resting a hand on his brother’s shoulder as we too turn back to the majesty of the powerful creatures beneath us. A hand slips in mine and Drew squeezes my fingers, placing an arm around Natalie as they join us, the seven of us staring with open mouths of wonder.
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