The Promise in Your Eyes

by Wendy Lindstrom

  She pressed her hands to her cheeks and shook her head, unable to answer because there were too many thoughts circling her mind.

  He studied her for a long moment, as if he wanted to tell her something, or press her for an answer. Instead, he said, “Be careful, Mom. I don’t want you to set yourself up for a broken heart.”

  Kyle’s concern came from his love for her. He’d had been the caretaker of their family for so many years that it was in his nature to look after her. She stood and walked around the table, and then wrapped her arms around his neck. She rested her head on his. “You are such a good son.” She kissed the top of his wool hat. “I appreciate your concern, but you don’t need to worry about me, Kyle. You’ve carried that burden your entire life. I love you, son, but this is not a dilemma even you can resolve. This is something I have to figure out on my own; something I need to take care of myself.” She leaned back and met his eyes, the same eyes of the little boy who’d hugged her when she cried after Hal’s diagnosis. The same eyes of the teenage boy who helped to care for his father before his death, and then mourned so deeply when his father took his last breath. Kyle had given up so much to run their family business and ensure Nancy and his younger brothers were taken care of, and here he was still looking after her.

  “I understand,” he said. “But I can’t help worrying about you. I’ll be here, no matter what happens. Promise you’ll let me know if you need anything.”

  “I will, sweetheart.” She cupped his face, kissed his forehead as she’d done so many times over the years, and then propped her hands on her hips. “Now you boys had better get back to work.”

  “That’s right,” Boyd said, stepping back into the kitchen. “Daylight’s a wasting, big brother. We’ve got an order to deliver.”

  With a kiss to her cheek, Boyd and Kyle left the house, shutting out the bitter wind and leaving her tucked in the warmth of her home and Dawson’s loving arms. But the easy comfort she’d enjoyed the last few days didn’t remain – it had headed out the door with Boyd and Kyle, replaced instead by the knowledge that Dawson would be leaving in three days and she’d promised him an answer.

  Chapter 15

  December 31, 1890

  “Well, I think that’s the last of it, Rebecca,” Nancy said as she popped what felt like the tenth dish into the oven. For the first time, the adults decided to have a New Year’s Eve party in the loft above Faith’s greenhouse. The whole family would attend early, and then Benny and Cora would tend the younger children just across the street at Duke and Faith’s house, so the adults could enjoy their evening dancing. It was a rare opportunity to have all the adults together without children running underfoot. Usually Nancy kept her grandchildren on evenings such as this so her sons and their wives could enjoy an evening out. But tonight she was attending the party and leaving her worries behind for a few hours.

  She and Rebecca had spent most of the day in the kitchen preparing a number of dishes for the party. With the last one in the oven, they surveyed the kitchen. “Well, I do believe we’ve made a right mess of it in here. But, we’ll be well fed with all of the food we’ve made today,” Nancy said.

  “We’ll be overfed, but I’m eating for two now, so I’m looking forward to indulging,” Rebecca said with a laugh. “Let’s clean up this mess so we can nap before it’s time to get ready.”

  Nancy and Rebecca worked quickly to wash and dry dishes and wipe down the sideboards and the table where streaks of flour and sugar and spices had left a sandy layer. Finally, after nearly an hour, the last dish was put away and the kitchen was again spotless. While Rebecca headed to her room to nap, Nancy made a cup of tea and took it to the parlor.

  The temperature was thankfully a bit milder today and so she hadn’t started a fire in the fireplace. But without it, the room felt lonely. Maybe it was because Dawson and Adam had scooted out of the house shortly after breakfast to chop firewood. That was just as well, though. Her conversation with Kyle the day before weighed heavy on her heart, and she knew that Dawson had sensed her inner turmoil.

  Tomorrow would be their last day together. He would leave the following morning with Leo and Adam and Rebecca. He would want an answer tomorrow.

  Despite her turmoil, Nancy was tired enough to nap that afternoon, which was a good thing considering she would stay awake long enough to ring in a new year with her family. For all the good things that had come out of the past year, she was also ready to leave some things behind. Tonight would be a celebration of their journey and the promise of things to come in the new year.

  After her nap, Nancy bathed and dressed. She pulled on her bloomers and her shift and then wrapped her corset around her waist, cinching it tightly at her back. She tugged down on her corset to settle it into place and then reached for the dress hanging in her closet. She stepped carefully into the skirt and pulled it up to her waist. She pulled the on bodice one arm at a time then looked at the long row of buttons.

  As she fastened the first button, she heard a knock on her door. “Grandma, may I come in?” Rebecca called from the other side of the door.

  “Please do! I could use some help with these buttons.”

  Rebecca stepped inside and gasped. “You look so pretty, Grandma. You’re going to be the belle of the ball tonight.”

  Nancy laughed, taking in her beautiful granddaughter. Rebecca wore a green taffeta dress with a satin edged scoop neck and sleeves that were puffed at the shoulder and fitted at the forearm. The pleated skirt hung to the floor with a bit of a train trailing behind. “I think that honor will go to you, my dear. You’re absolutely stunning,” she said, taking in Rebecca’s shining mass of black hair pinned up in a pretty arrangement of long, dangling curls.

  As Rebecca helped Nancy finish buttoning her gown, she said, “Let me dress your hair after I button you up, Grandma.”

  “Is it falling?” Nancy asked, patting the simple chignon that she’d just pinned in place.

  “No. But a gown as elegant as that one requires a hairstyle just as elegant. Do sit and let me style it for you.”

  Nancy sat and peered in the mirror above her dressing table as Rebecca unraveled the chignon and brushed out her hair. She twisted strands of Nancy’s hair around her finger, leaving them hanging in ringlets around her face. Nancy had always cursed her curly hair but tonight Rebecca made them an asset as she pinned them up, letting a good bit of Nancy’s hair cascade down her neck and shoulders. “There,” Rebecca said, stepping back to admire her work. “You are now ready to meet that handsome man who is waiting for you in the parlor.”

  “Dawson’s home?”

  “And ready for our party,” Rebecca said.

  A sudden swoop of butterflies seemed to rush through Nancy’s stomach. She stood and hugged Rebecca. “Thank you for this beautiful dress and for reminding me what’s it’s like to feel young again.”

  Together they left the bedroom.

  “Look at you ladies,” Adam said, coming to his feet as they enter the room. “You ladies look fabulous.”

  Dawson was already on his feet, standing near the fireplace, his elbow resting on the mantle. At Adam’s exclamation, Dawson turned and his jaw dropped. His eyes seemed to drink her in, telling Nancy everything she needed to know – he did not see her as a grandmother.

  Chapter 16

  Dawson rode beside Nancy in the carriage with Adam and Rebecca, who were talking about the party. William was acting as their driver this evening, which seemed to delight Nancy when he’d pulled in with the carriage.

  “Gracious,” she said, snuggling in beside Dawson. “I remember holding that little tyke on my shoulder just yesterday, and now William is carting us off to a party and will be heading back to university in a couple of days.” She shook her head as if in disbelief.

  Her auburn curls bounced against her shoulders and back, making him want to slip his fingers into her hair and kiss her. He finally understood what his brother Elias felt for his wife Georgia. He understood the looks that p
assed between each of Nancy’s sons and their wives. And he understood what drove Adam to do what needed to be done to make Rebecca fall in love with him all over again. Because Dawson was deeply in love with the woman beside him. He couldn’t figure out how to put the enormity of what he was feeling into words. But he would. Tonight. Nothing was more important than showing Nancy how much he loved her and needed her in his life. And by the end of the evening, he was determined that her answer to his proposal would be yes.

  After William brought the carriage to a stop in front of the greenhouse, he hopped down and helped Nancy and Rebecca out of the carriage. Dawson and Adam followed them out. Nancy kissed William’s cheek and then linked arms with Dawson, her eyes sparkling and filled with warmth. He wasn’t certain what had suddenly made her willing to show him affection in public, but he welcomed the change. “You look very handsome tonight,” she whispered. “I hope your leg is fit enough for a dance or two this evening.”

  “I’ll dance with you all night,” he said, determined to keep that sparkle in her eyes. Because tonight he intended for her to laugh and dance, and understand they could live their lives enjoying moment like this. They had so much more ahead of them, and that’s what he wanted to show her tonight.

  He tucked her hand in the crook of his arm and escorted her into the greenhouse and up the stairs to the loft.

  Nothing could have prepared Dawson for what greeted him when he stepped onto the top step. Nancy’s children had been working hard to transform the large open space into a festive hall. Boughs of pine were hung along all four walls. Large pots of red poinsettias filled the hall. The back corner of the room boasted a blue fir. The tree was lit with candles, all shining brightly from their perches on the branches. The light from the candles reflected off the colorful ornaments decorating the tree, throwing light out in all directions. Beside the tree, a musical quartet was tuning up, tightening the strings on their violins, adjusting the mouthpiece of the clarinet, and fingering the thick strings of an upright bass.

  The sound filled Dawson with anticipation. His leg ached, but he looked forward to taking Nancy in his arms and dancing her across the floor. Along the back wall of the loft was a long table topped with white linen tablecloths. Candles had been placed at intervals along the table, providing illumination for the variety of platters and bowls that covered nearly the entire surface. The Grayson women had clearly outdone themselves again.

  “You seem surprised by all of this,” Nancy said, smiling up at him.

  “I am. I hadn’t expected as much,” he said, gesturing to the great, decked out hall.” As she looked up at him, he looked down into her brown eyes and couldn’t hold back another second. “You look so beautiful, Nancy. I’m sorry I didn’t say anything earlier, but you took my breath away. When I saw you standing in the hall, I could hardly breathe.”

  “Likewise,” she said, and then she turned to greet Duke and his wife Faith and a long line of family members. During the lengthy greetings, she shared a private smile with him and squeezed his hand.

  Family and friends continued to arrive, and Nancy smiled and laughed and greeted each one as if she hadn’t seen them in years. The love bonding this family together was deeply moving. Dawson placed his hand at Nancy’s back, feeling the warmth of her family spilling over to him. He reeled from the emotions that slammed into him. This is what he’d been missing with his family. They had tried to keep him close, but Dawson’s injury had pulled him away. But now he was ready step back into the loving arms of his family, and that made him eager to marry Nancy and return to Crane Landing.

  In a few short minutes, Dawson had greeted so many members of Nancy’s extended family that his mind was spinning. Tansy and Cyrus, Leo’s guardians, arrived with Benny. Aster and Doc Milton followed shortly behind, and then Dahlia and Anna and three other women hustled up the stairs. Iris and Patrick arrived last and before long, the entire extended Grayson family was laughing and celebrating the evening. Faith’s aunts were interesting women and the conversation was always lively when they were around. Dawson stood back for a moment and just drank it in. He’d avoided social situations in Crane Landing, not wanting to be the object of gossip and speculation. He thought he’d liked it better that way. Instead, he realized he’d created a lonely existence for himself. But no longer. The Grayson family socialized and celebrated together and he intended to become part of this family, and to reunite with his own. He missed them and was eager to get home to Tuck and Sir John.

  After two hours of playing and celebrating with family and friends, the children were rounded up and delivered across the street where they were tucked safely in the house. They would continue their own celebration there with parlor games and special treats.

  It was time for the adults to relax and enjoy the rest of the evening dancing.

  The quartet began a cotillion grand march, signaling the beginning of the dancing. Dawson turned to Nancy. “Shall we?”

  She glanced down at his leg. “Will it bother your leg?”

  “I have no idea,” he said. “I haven’t danced since my accident.”

  A gentle, beautiful smile lifted her lips. “Then it’s long past time.”

  He offered his hand and she placed her palm atop his own. “Hold on, darling, I can’t promise a smooth ride,” he said, and swept her in a wide circle, causing her to laugh as he danced her onto the floor. “You, my love, are ravishing tonight and I can’t keep my eyes off you.”

  Instead of blushing, as he’d expected her to do, Nancy surprised him by gazing up at him. “It is my eyes that can’t seem to leave your handsome face, Mr. Crane.”

  Dawson grinned down at her. “I hate to break this news to you, Nancy, but I’m afraid your vision is failing.”

  Her laughter floated out across the room where everyone was dancing and laughing, many of them flirting as Dawson and Nancy were doing.

  He loved Nancy’s sense of humor and that she could turn the tables as well as he could. Much of their time together was spent joking with one another. He pulled her a little closer, his right hand at her slim waist and his left hand holding hers as the music swelled and changed to a waltz.

  Nancy leaned into him, and he held her a bit closer than was appropriate, but not so close as to make her or her children uncomfortable. “You make me feel young again, Nancy.”

  She squeezed his hand. “You make me feel light and beautiful. I can’t remember the last time I felt this way.”

  “You should feel that way every day,” he said as they stepped and turned to the flowing strains of the waltz. His leg ached, but he ignored it, wanting nothing to end this moment with her in his arms. And so, at the expense of his leg, they danced. And they danced. As the evening grew late and another song ended, Dawson stepped back and bowed to his lady.

  Applause filled the room and he heard Nancy gasp.

  Apparently they had been so caught up in one another neither of them had noticed that the others stopped dancing and stepped to the edge of the floor to watch. Nancy’s face was flushed, from dancing or from embarrassment, he didn’t know. But he could see joy in the eyes of her family, as if it pleased them deeply to see Nancy laughing and dancing in the arms of a man who obviously loved her.

  “Gracious, I didn’t realize we were the center of attention,” she said just loud enough for him to hear.

  “It was all you, darling. You’ve captured the attention of everyone in the room.”

  “Well then, I say we finish with a flourish. Take a bow, Mr. Crane.”

  Laughing, he turned and executing a grand bow. As he stood, he stepped back and motioned to Nancy who grasped her skirt and dropped into a deep curtsy, like a lead actress in a theater show. Her family laughed and clapped even louder.

  With that, Dawson linked arms with Nancy and he led her from the dance floor, desperate to find a chair to sit in to rest his aching leg. The time with Nancy was worth the pain, but gads, his knee was screaming for relief.

  Laughing and out of
breath, he and Nancy fairly dropped onto their chairs. Dawson leaned forward trying to catch his breath but each time he looked at Nancy, he began laughing again. And so did she. He loved her laugh, because she laughed with her entire body.

  Her eyes lit up, her shoulders shook and she wrapped her arm around her middle. “We made a spectacle of ourselves, didn’t we?”

  “I believe we did so in fine style.”

  “And it was grand fun!”

  Dawson leaned back and took a few deep breaths, finally calming his heart. He and Nancy sat and watched her sons and their wives, and their older children and close friends, dance a lively reel.

  Dawson turned to her, “I’m not sure I’m going to make it to midnight, sweetheart. I think the years are finally catching up to me.” Truth was, he didn’t want to stay until midnight. He wanted to go home and spend some time alone with Nancy, to ask her once again to marry him.

  “I feel the same way,” she confided. “I wonder if we can get William to cart us home now and then return to the party.

  At the first break between songs, Nancy caught up with her grandson, who rushed outside to fetch their carriage. Dawson already had their coats in hand. At Nancy’s wave, he crossed the room and helped her on with her coat and scarf. They tugged on their gloves and made their exit waving and wishing all a happy New Year.

  They entered her cozy house minutes later arm-in-arm and laughing. But as they faced each other in the foyer, their faces softly illuminated in in the light of the small table lamp, their smiles fell away and they sank into each other’s arms.

  Their mouths met softly at first, and then they gave into the desire they’d suppressed all evening.

  * * *

  Tonight was one of the best Nancy had had in years. But she was afraid of what was to come. She knew Dawson was expecting her answer and that he’d been refraining all night from asking her. But now they were alone and he was heading a direction she couldn’t go—no matter how deeply she might want to.