Psych-Out

by Nova Nelson

  Maybe he should be my tutor, I thought.

  Uh, no. Stupid idea, Nora.

  I hadn’t gotten great sleep the night before, and not simply because Ruby had seemingly done her best to scare the everliving snot out of me with her foreboding nonsense. And also not simply because Grim insisted on sleeping on his back all night, which always made him snore louder than a freight train.

  It was the dream that had left me exhausted. I’d heard different things about how dreams worked, time-wise. Some people say a dream that feels like it lasts hours only lasts a matter of thirty seconds. This one had felt like it lasted all night, though I could remember hardly any of it. It was fresh in my mind when I awoke, then all but snippets vanished as soon as I’d opened my eyes. I tried to string it together, to figure out why it had felt so potent and left me in such a mental haze. In it, everything was green, and the skies were a smoky gray, there was someone there with me, and I was so much younger…

  I jumped as Tanner’s hands slid around my waist and I felt his hot breath on my neck. “Hey, beautiful.” He planted a light kiss where my neck and shoulder met, sending shivers down my spine.

  He turned me around to face him and jerked his head back when he saw that I was still gripping a butter knife. “Whoa, easy there.”

  I put it down on the counter. “Sorry. You surprised me.”

  “Ah. Good survival instinct, then. But next time you might want to grab one of the steak knives.”

  “You saying I need to learn to defend myself from you?”

  A small half-grin flickered at the corner of his rosy lips. “Probably a good idea.” He leaned forward for the kiss, but something stopped me.

  “Tanner,” I whispered, “It’s unprofessional for us to … you know.”

  His eyes did a quick scan of the dining room. “It’s just Hendrix Hardy. He’s half asleep.” He cringed then returned his attention to me. “Either way, you really going to deprive me of a kiss? Secret’s out about us, Nora.”

  He raised valid points, and still I felt resistance, leading me to believe it wasn’t the presence of our insomniac werewolf regular causing me to resist.

  When he leaned forward this time, though, I acquiesced.

  And the feel of his lips on mine was a trigger. The dream hit me like a movie sped up ten thousand times.

  You ever have a dream that’s so real that the emotions of it—love, connection, loss, guilt—linger with you as if it wasn’t a dream but a reality you had just spent the night indulging in, free of the rules and loyalties from your waking hours? And when you wake, there’s a dull aching for the world you visited that you know you’ll never see again?

  My guilt almost didn’t let me continue the kiss. My mind was so absolutely sure I had cheated on Tanner.

  No, not with Donovan, though I can see how you would think that’s what I meant. But my guilt for that strange night in the Deadwoods had somewhat faded over the weeks since, whether that was acceptable or not, who’s to say?

  I’m talking about the previous night. In my dreams. I had cheated on Tanner.

  Or maybe I was cheating with Tanner. That was more the sensation.

  I could almost see the face of the man from the dream, too, but that part was still partially obscured, as if hidden behind a sheer curtain. My skin prickled where this mysterious man’s soft caresses had landed.

  Stop thinking about your stupid dream! Get over it and kiss your super hot boyfriend!

  I pinched my eyes shut tighter, trying to refocus, and I’m happy to say, I did, just in time to sneak in a little extra making out with Tanner’s fingers forking through my hair before the bell above the front door tinkled, and we pulled away from each other quickly.

  Hyacinth Bouquet stood in the doorway, and I couldn’t tell if the elf was more scandalized or flustered. Just behind her stood her husband, James, who tucked today’s copy of the Eastwind Watch under his armpit so he could give Tanner two thumbs up.

  I cleared my throat. “Morning, Bouquets. Sit anywhere you like and I’ll be right with you.”

  I turned back to Tanner and shot him a glare.

  “What?” He said, laughing. “We just gave Hyacinth enough gossip to last her the next few hours”—he lowered his voice to an excited whisper—“and I think I just won James’s fatherly approval after all these years.” He shrugged. “Everybody wins.”

  “Yeah,” I said, leaning forward, “James seemed a little too into it, actually.” I cringed, and when the implication hit Tanner, so did he.

  “I’d better go check on Hendrix,” he said, hurrying off. I grabbed the coffee pot and two mugs, and headed over to the Bouquets’ table to start my day.

  A week passed with not a single murder or mystery presenting itself, and I was happy about that … wasn’t I? It meant my time outside of Medium Rare was wide open for more lessons like tonight’s, which were slowly killing me, I was fairly sure.

  “Once more,” Ruby barked. Oliver flicked his wrist and all the lights in the parlor lit again. Or all of them that I’d managed to quench on my previous attempt, which was about half.

  I groaned. Quenching had been so much easier when it was a life-or-death situation. “I think I’m tapped out,” I said.

  “Nonsense,” Ruby replied. “Once more, then we’ll take a break.”

  “And after the break?”

  “More practice.”

  “For fang’s sake,” I grumbled, then I shut my eyes and tried it again. “Couldn’t we do something easier like exorcising Oliver a few dozen times?”

  “Not funny,” he said.

  “Wasn’t meaning to be.”

  Quenching felt a little like sucking in air until your lungs were about to burst, holding it, and then clenching all the muscles in your chest and abdomen as if you were trying your best to push all the air from your lungs. I hadn’t realized how difficult it was the first time I’d done it because I was already in fight or flight mode, and clenching all my muscles and holding my breath was just part of that moment when I thought the werewolves were going to claw Donovan to pieces and I would be forced to watch it.

  It’s much harder to muster that kind of reaction when all you want to do is reheat the burger you brought home from work, read a good book, and go to sleep (preferably without the cheating dreams).

  But I did as Ruby instructed, because that in itself was solid survival instinct.

  I gave quenching one more shot.

  One of the hovering candles in the corner of the room extinguished, and a few of the baubles above our heads swayed, but that was all I got.

  “I think she’s spent,” Oliver said.

  I put my back to Ruby so only he could see when I mouthed, Thank you!

  “We’ll take a break, then,” Ruby conceded.

  “I think we’d better call it a night, don’t you?” Oliver continued, showing uncharacteristic bravery in the face of the old necromancer who was used to having her way. Good for him. For that, I’d continue to pretend he hadn’t confessed to regularly french braiding the long hair of his familiar, a large Persian cat, which he—or rather the spirit inside him—had mentioned on day two of our exorcism training.

  “Fine,” Ruby said. “If you think it’s best, Oliver, I trust you.”

  The tutor seemed almost as surprised to hear those words from her mouth as I did.

  “Would you like some tea before you head out?” she added.

  Oliver was a smart man. Smart enough to know when not to push his luck with Ruby’s hospitality. “No thanks. I’m going to head out so I can get an early start in the morning.”

  I wouldn’t say he ran out of the house, but he definitely didn’t stroll.

  Ruby allowed me some space as I leaned heavily on the table, exhausted from the day’s lesson.

  “Perhaps I’ve been driving you too hard,” Ruby said, breaking the silence. She brought over my burger, already reheated, and set it in front of me.

  I didn’t know what to say other than, “Thank
s.”

  “I know you’re not a child, Nora. But I worry about you, and perhaps I do so more than is required. After all, you channeled without trouble the first time you ever tried it. You were able to quench without exploding the first time you tried that, too, and you managed to open and shut the door to your past lives without incident. I wasn’t able to do those things so successfully and safely on my first attempt, so it seems I’ve been projecting.” She sat across from me. “Don’t let it go to your head, but you might be more talented at this than I was when I first started out.”

  “I also have a mentor,” I said, feeling guilty for some reason. “You didn’t.”

  She nodded. “This is true. Had I been mentored by a retired Fifth Wind, I would likely have been exponentially more skilled than you at this stage. But alas, when I came to town, there was no one already waiting for me to show the way.”

  “Sorry your retirement is so … tiring.”

  She waved that away with a flap of her hand. “Nonsense. I was never fool enough to think I could leave my Fifth Wind responsibilities behind. Perhaps I was fool enough to hope, but that’s not the same. We hope for things we don’t believe will happen all the time.”

  “Do you ever miss it?” I asked. “You know, solving the mysteries around town? Murders, thefts, hauntings, and so on?”

  Rather than responding, she sighed and narrowed her eyes at me. “I take it you’re discovering that leaving behind your Fifth Wind responsibilities to this town is not as easy as you’d hoped.”

  “No, it’s easy enough,” I said. “Medium Rare is great and Tanner is wonderful and I’m getting better training than I ever have, but … I don’t know.”

  “It seems purposeless?” Ruby said it gently, arching a brow.

  I winced. “I dunno if I’d say… well, no. You’re spot on. It seems purposeless.”

  She nodded. “I know. Do you understand why it feels that way?”

  “Not really. I assume you do, though.”

  Ruby chuckled. “Oh yes, I know exactly why.”

  I sat up straighter. “Sharing is caring.”

  She smiled and reached forward, tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear. “Not this time. But I do know what you’re feeling, so at least you can take solace in knowing you’re not alone.”

  She stood from the table and headed toward the stairs.

  “Wait,” I called. “What do you think I should do?”

  She turned back toward me, sighed, and rolled her eyes. “About what?”

  “About helping around town with the unsolved cases.”

  “Oh.” She blew a raspberry and waved it off. “You don’t have to do a thing, dear. You couldn’t stop burying your nose in swirls of trouble if you tried. No, not a Fifth Wind. We’re magnets for the stuff. I mean, look at me! I claimed to be done with ghostly drama, and yet I took the biggest disaster-magnet in town under my roof. I think it’s admirable that you’re trying to focus on other things, but ultimately, it’s futile. You think you have a decision to make, but you really don’t. It’s not up to you.” She smiled. “If life has taught me anything about this, it’s that the best you can hope for is to have another Fifth Wind arrive in town and hope she can screen you from the brunt of the trouble.” She turned around and over her shoulder added, “Night, dear.”

  I opened my eyes and stared up into a gray-blue sky. A crisp ocean breeze whispered through the thick grass beneath where I lay, and as a shiver ran through me, a warm body on my right pulled me close, sharing warmth. I looked and there he was. The man I knew and yet didn’t know. He stared up at the sky, allowing me a quiet moment to take in his profile. He was young, eighteen or nineteen perhaps, but then again, so was I. He squinted through turquoise eyes into the cloudy sky, his nose a long, straight sculpture, a thing of fine craftsmanship. The first signs of stubble were only just appearing along the pink of his cheeks and above the cupid’s bow of his lips. He was in that wondrous phase between boyhood and manhood, where I could close one eye and see the rosy-cheeked face of the boy I’d grown up with, then switch and look through the other eye and see the firm, manly line of the jaw and the specific coordinates where worry would set in over time, carving lines around his blue-green eyes like loughs leading into the sea.

  “Won’t be long before I’m expected to marry,” he said. His voice was deep, rich, and there was no missing the Irish brogue, though it didn’t quite sound like any I’d heard before.

  “And?”

  He turned his head toward mine, our faces only a few inches apart. “I won’t. I’ll refuse.”

  “You can’t do that.”

  “I can. It won’t be a popular decision, but I can’t be made to do it if I choose not to.”

  “You know what it’ll come to.”

  “I’m the only male heir. It won’t come to that. And if it does …”

  “You’re being ridiculous,” I said. “You’re stubborn, but not that stubborn.”

  He rolled onto his side, propping his head up on his fist. “I’m not being ridiculous. I mean it, Diana. There’s only one woman I want.” He brushed the hair from my face and his eyes followed his fingertips as he traced them down my jaw, over my neck, to my collarbone. He caressed the outline, studying it, and allowing me another quiet moment to marvel at his intense beauty.

  “It’s impossible,” I said.

  “Then we’ll leave together.”

  “And where will we go?”

  “Does it matter? Anywhere. I would follow you into death.”

  “I should hope it doesn’t come to that.”

  He smiled down at me, and a moment later his subdued contemplation was broken by a burst of passion, and his lips crashed into mine. I felt the full weight of his hopes, his sorrow, and something else … like a promise, but—

  “Sweet swirls!” I gasped, sitting up in bed. My shout startled Grim, who awoke where he lay, splayed on his back, on his dog bed. He wiggled desperately until he could roll over onto his feet.

  “What? What is it?”

  “Sorry,” I said. “Just a dream. A vivid dream.”

  “Did it involve a delicious smelling jackalope that was just asking for it?”

  “Uh … definitely not. Why?”

  “Making sure we weren’t having the same dream.”

  “I sure hope we weren’t,” I said, still feeling the tingle of the man’s lips on mine.

  “Same. A death witch and her death omen familiar having a shared dream? There’s no way that wouldn’t end in tears all around.”

  “I hadn’t thought about it like that. But you’re right. Now I’m extra glad.”

  I doubted whether I could fall back asleep after the dream, and when I checked the clock, I realized there was no point in trying. I would need to be up for work in a half hour anyway. Might as well get an early start to the day and hope that the haze lingering around me from that emerald field and the warmth of his body pressed against mine faded before I made it in to work.

  Chapter Four

  Tanner squeezed my hand as we walked through town after our shift. The mid-August sun was hot against my skin, but the first refreshing winds of autumn had started to sneak into town. “Are you alright?” he asked.

  I stared up at him. “What?” I laughed. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

  “I beg to differ,” Grim said from the other side of me. “You’re not more okay than you ever are.”

  “You just seem, I dunno, tired or distracted. In your head sort of.” He added hastily, “And that’s fine. You get to be however you want to be, I just want to see if you’re alright and if not, if there’s anything I can do to help.”

  I raised up onto my tippy-toes to give him a quick kiss. “I’m just tired. Oliver and Ruby are kicking my hide with the training lately.”

  “Yeah? You got any special powers you want to show me?”

  Grim’s tail drooped. “Sweet baby jackalope, not this again.”

  “Yes,” I said, “but I can’t do it in public.�
�

  “Please stop.”

  Tanner pulled me closer, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. “Then I guess it’s good we’re heading back to my place. I have a few special powers I’d like to show you.”

  Grim gagged.

  I ignored his theatrics. “And what powers would a West Wind witch have that I haven’t already seen?”

  “Nora, you’ve never seen me in the autumn, but it’s right around the corner. If I’ve ever done anything to impress you, you should prepare to have your mind blown when my powers peak.”

  “It’s not fair,” I said. “All the witches have their seasons where their powers are kicking butt and taking names. All except me. Wah-wah.”

  “You don’t need a season, though, beautiful.” He kissed the top of my head as we rounded the corner toward Fulcrum Park. “Your powers peak at night. You get to be awesome year round.”

  I groaned. “Someday I’ll be awesome. Right now I can hardly quench without giving myself a hernia.”

  He leaned away from me and blinked quickly. “Whoa. Quenching is a real thing?”

  “Yep.”

  “And you can do it?”

  “Sometimes.”

  He nodded as the new information settled on him. “That’s … pretty hot.”

  Grim gagged again.

  “You can go back to Ruby’s if you don’t like it,” I said.

  “Trust me. I would, except I promised Monster I would distract her while the two of you light that forest fire of pheromones upstairs.”

  “Always so dramatic. We’re not going to—”

  The sight of Fulcrum Fountain stopped me in my tracks.

  “What the spell?” Tanner said, staring at the overflowing fountain at the center of the manicured park.

  “Something must be clogging it,” I said as we approached. “Maybe that’s it?” I said, pointing to a light-blue sundress floating on the surface.