“You, the guys, Sophia. Yeah.”
“That’s thoughtful. It took time. It involved you spending your money, and you expended physical effort to bring it here to the beach. I saw you moving the ice chest across the sand.”
“Not much, L—Lotus.”
I set down the sandwich and reached for his hand, squeezing it while holding his gaze. “Something that’s not much to you means a lot to me. Time’s precious. Money’s short. Any effort on my behalf is important. It’s caring, and caring should never be dismissed. So, thank you for caring for me. Truly.”
“God, I missed— I mean, it’s been a long time since I talked to someone like you.”
Considering his words, I tilted my head and picked up my sandwich again. I wasn’t going to let a bite of it go to waste, nor a single drop of my beer. Everything about this night, I planned to consume, and while consuming, to savor.
I liked Journey, and he liked me. I didn’t need to make it any more complicated than that.
“So, what kind of people do you usually talk to?” I asked a broad question on my quest to learn more about him. It wasn’t only his good looks, the mystery surrounding him, or his skill on the guitar that intrigued me.
“Studio execs, band managers, other musicians,” he said, his gaze drifting over me. Was he having difficulty focusing around me the way I was around him? “No one like you.”
His eyes darkened. He seemed to appreciate my denim shorts overalls and the hot pink tube top I’d paired with them. I certainly liked his muscle shirt and jeans. Or maybe it was more the way he filled them out. His broad shoulders stretched the cotton, and his deltoids strained the frayed arm holes of his tee.
My gaze met his after a drifting of my own. Were my eyes darker? He’d been watching me check him out. My cheeks warmed as his lips curved.
“Don’t you have any friends that you talk to about non-work stuff?” I narrowed my field of questioning.
“Some.” He glanced across the fire. Reese and Sophia had disappeared beneath a blanket.
“Reese?” I asked.
“Yeah, he’s cool.” Journey took another sip of his beer, and I watched his Adam’s apple move as he swallowed while peering at me through his thick lashes.
“But you’re leaving the group.”
“It was a temporary gig. I knew that going in. I prefer temporary. I don’t form lasting attachments. It’s time for me to move on.”
“Where are you going next?”
“I’m not sure yet.” He gave me a long look. “I got thrown a huge curveball tonight, so it depends.”
“Depends on what?” I tilted my head.
His lips flattened. “Can we not talk about plans and serious stuff?”
“What do you want to talk about instead?” I asked, trying to keep the hurt out of my tone that he’d shut me down.
“I don’t know.” His gaze moved to the ocean, and he took another swig of his beer. Then he set the empty aluminum can on the sand and smashed it with his booted foot. “I don’t usually do a lot of talking with chicks.”
“Right.”
Temporary. No attachments. No sharing. In a roundabout way, he was letting me know what this was.
Finished with my sandwich, I crumpled the plastic wrapping into a ball and tossed it into the ice chest. In a more straightforward fashion, I decided to let him know about me.
“I don’t usually kiss a guy I just met.”
His gaze snapped to me.
“I get what you’re trying to tell me,” I said. “But I thought I’d just go ahead and let you know straight up about me.”
“Something that hasn’t changed,” he said softly.
“I don’t understand.” My brows pinched together.
“I don’t know how you can be so sure you know my thoughts when I’m not certain of them myself.”
“But you just said—”
“I was sharing about my life because you asked me a bunch of questions. That’s all. I didn’t have an ulterior motive.” His eyes narrowed. “If you’d rather not talk, we can do other stuff. My cock’s certainly rock-hard after that kiss.”
He reached for a blanket, shook it out, and stared at me, giving me that intense look that electrified my skin.
I scooted closer to him when maybe I should have been offended. But I wasn’t. There was something about him that intrigued me, even his abruptness.
Journey drew me closer, throwing the scratchy wool blanket around us, then enveloped me in his strong arms. Framing my face, he swept his thumbs over my cheeks as he stared at me.
The fire beside us was burning down, but not so much that I couldn’t see the glistening intensity in his eyes. There was need there. A craving. One I shared. One I desperately wanted to fill. Sadly, I knew sometimes you only got one chance with someone.
“Lotus,” he said softly.
I shivered, then melted when his lips touched mine.
This kiss was different from the one before. The first one had shattered my expectations and established new loftier ones. But this kiss was a siege. His tongue drove into my mouth as his hands plunged into my hair, his fingers on a mission. He dislodged my elastic and grabbed fistfuls of my loose hair.
My hands were busy too. I spread them wide over the chiseled surface of his hard chest, surrendering with a moan as his passion crashed over me. Flames licked my skin as he claimed me.
Every dark corner of my mouth was explored, and my nipples hardened. My blood burned. Between my legs, my pulse throbbed. A hunger built, a demanding ache low in my belly.
My tongue tangling with his, I lashed his mouth with desire of my own. Need, craving, it rose like a wave rushing toward the shore. I slipped my hands under his shirt, and he groaned when my fingers skimmed his skin.
“Lotus.” Suddenly, he ripped his mouth from mine. “Stop.” He gripped my shoulders firmly, his face taut with desire.
“Why?” I panted, my gaze searching his.
“I want you. I want you naked. I want inside you.”
“Oh.” My eyes widened. “I want that too.”
“But not here. Not furtive and grasping. I need room and privacy to explore. I want you in my bed at my place. I want to see you . . . take my time with you.”
“Yes.” I licked my lips. “I’d like that. I’ll go with you.”
A need like this had to be fulfilled.
Lotus
“HEY,” I TOLD Sophia. “I’m leaving with Journey.”
I gestured to where he stood, waiting for me just a couple of feet away. He had the blankets we’d used tucked under his arm. The ice chest was already in the bed of his truck. He’d carried it on his shoulder and set it down next to his surfboard. I didn’t ask where his guitar was, assuming it was in the trailer with the other instruments.
“Where are you going?” She looked up at me with a dazed expression, her lips swollen from Reese’s kisses.
“His place.”
“Lotus—”
“I’m not debating,” I said quickly. “I’m going. But if you want us to drop you at the hotel first, Journey says we can do that.”
“I’ll take her,” Reese said, his piercing blue eyes meeting mine.
“You don’t have a car.”
“Gonna walk up the beach in a bit. Get a drink at one of the bars.”
“I’ll get a shared ride back to the hotel afterward.” Sophia tilted her head. “If you’re sure about this.”
“I am.” I looked down at my phone and pressed send. “I texted you his address. I’ll call you in a little while and check in.”
“Okay.” No longer looking dazed, Sophia now seemed troubled, but I wasn’t.
I couldn’t explain it, this sense of calm. But it was there, as immutable as the desire.
When I rejoined Journey, he threw his arm around my shoulders. The tiny trickle of trepidation that had surfaced when I was talking to Sophia disappeared. Something as undeniable as this deserved exploring.
“You okay?” h
e asked as we retraced our steps in the sand. “You can change your mind.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Maybe not now. But if you say stop at any time, we’ll stop, and I’ll take you back to the hotel.”
“Do you want to change your mind?” I glanced at him through my lashes.
“Hell no.” The wind whipped several wavy locks into his eyes, shadowing them. “I just want you to know that you’re not a foregone conclusion. I plan to earn my way step by step to your final yes.”
“I like that.” I swallowed hard, imagining what those steps might involve. “I like you.”
“I like you too, Lotus. More than I ever could have imagined.”
That was a funny way to say I was unexpected.
I tilted my head, watching him as he opened the passenger door for me. When I climbed in, he closed the door, and I continued watching him as he rounded the hood. Something about his profile and stride seemed vaguely familiar.
“Have you ever visited Ocean Beach before?” I asked as he dropped the blankets in the back and reached for his seat belt.
Journey froze in midmotion. “Yeah, I have.” He clicked his belt and put his key in the ignition.
“Ah, maybe I saw you. Did you play one of the clubs with a band?”
“No.” He threw his arm over the back of my seat and turned his head to back out.
“Oh. Did you go to the Deck Bar for drinks or food, maybe?”
“No.” Turning the steering wheel, he shifted and steered the car out of the parking lot. “Is that one of the places where you work?”
“Yes,” I said, noting his motions were stiffer than before. But I couldn’t see his features clearly. The parking lot had some lighting, but it was mostly dark, and his loose hair shadowed his eyes. “You just seem somewhat familiar to me.”
“I get that.” Journey’s words were clipped. “You seem familiar to me too. Maybe we ran into each other before.”
He glanced at me, and as we passed under a streetlight, I noted that his brow was creased. “Is it important that we figure it out?”
“No. I guess not.”
“It’s been a long time since I was in OB. Even if you saw me back then, I’m not that same person anymore.” He pulled to a stop at the top of the hill and flicked on his blinker.
“What type of person were you?” Worry like ice-cold fingers crept along my spine.
He turned the Scout onto a two-lane thoroughfare, and we passed through several intersections before he answered. “Just one unrecognizable to the man I am now.”
“How so?”
Journey blew out a breath, folding his arms on the steering wheel at a red light. He glanced at me, holding my gaze. “I’m a man jaded by my circumstances. I’m one who never had a woman like you with him . . . ever. I’m a man who doesn’t want to talk about the past. Or the future, really. I’m accustomed to living in the moment. To working hard for each unencumbered moment I get. I live hard, Lotus. I play little.”
I was digging and asking questions, trying to get to know him better. But this was playtime. Temporary. It wasn’t serious.
Message received.
“I’m sorry I pried. I was just curious. I work hard too and don’t play much at all.” I swallowed the hurt that he wasn’t interested in letting me in, not even just a little. “I understand that your time is valuable, and that you choosing to spend some right now with me is what it is and nothing more. You’re handsome. Confident.” And experienced, for sure, but I didn’t say that part. “Frankly, I’m flattered that you’re interested in me.”
Journey reached over and took my hand. “I’m honored that such a smart and beautiful woman agreed to come with me.”
The light changed to green. He moved our joined hands to his muscular thigh, keeping them there.
“Thank you.” My lips curved and my cheeks heated. The hurt disappeared like a mist burned away by the sun.
“No. Thank you, baby,” he said in a low, intimate tone that made my skin sizzle and other parts of me throb.
I turned my attention to the scenery, trying not to combust. The wind cooled my skin and carried the briny scent of the nearby Pacific to my nostrils.
The businesses on both sides of the street were dark and somewhat familiar since I’d been in Manhattan Beach before. The Dirt Dogs had played at a coffeehouse in the middle of town. MB was a little like OB, only sleepier, especially in the wee hours of the morning.
“Gonna warn you now, my place isn’t much to look at.” Journey put on his blinker, turning left just before the outskirts of town.
“I doubt that’s entirely true.”
“One room, dark and dreary. In this case, it is. Trust me.”
He accelerated, and the vehicle lurched a bit before it got traction to take us up the steep hill. Turning my head to look out the window, I noted the condition of the houses deteriorating as we climbed.
“My place isn’t much either. It’s old. But it’s where I grew up.”
It’s what I could afford, though I suspected the landlord gave me a sweet deal. Lately, the rent was a couple hundred less than I expected. I assumed she gave me an under-the-table discount because she’d known and liked my father.
“Here we are.” Slowing, Journey turned and parked the Scout in a short driveway in front of a multiunit structure several stories tall.
“You have parking?” I asked, my eyes widening.
“Got lucky tonight. Most of the time, I have to park at a spot on the street several blocks up.”
“Parking’s difficult to find in OB too.”
“Hold on,” he said, unlatching his seat belt. “We’re on an incline. I’ll come around and help you get out.”
“Okay,” I murmured, appreciating his care, but he probably didn’t hear me. He was already out and on the move around the hood.
He popped open my door and put both hands on my waist. Even through the denim of my overalls, I felt his heat and the imprint of his fingers as he lifted me out of my seat as if I weighed nothing.
Slowly, he lowered me to the ground, my curvy front sliding along the hard contours of his. I kept my hands on his solid forearms, even when my feet hit the ground, needing him for balance. My legs trembled as I noted a significant part of him was incredibly hard.
“Journey,” I said, licking my lips.
His gaze on my mouth, he didn’t speak for a long moment.
“Your lips are so pretty and full.” His gaze rose, the heat in them incinerating me. “They tilt up at the edges like your sultry eyes do.”
“Thank you.”
“You smell really good too. Like sunshine and salt spiked with citrus.” He groaned, and the vibrations of his pleasure thrummed my clit. “You feel so good in my arms. So right.”
“I like being held by you,” I whispered. “I like your mouth. The color, the shape, the firmness, what you do with it. You’re a really good kisser.” My cheeks heated as his lips curved.
“Another part of me is firm too, darlin’.” He rocked his cock against me. “I can do good things to you with it, I assure you. But let’s get you inside.”
He suddenly lifted me into his arms, sweeping me off my feet.
“Journey.” I gasped his name and twined my arms around his neck, but for some reason, when I made no protest whatsoever, he frowned. Wanting him to smile, I said, “You smell crisp, like the ocean spray when I first place my board on it. Fresh and clean like really good soil before I turn it over and tuck a seed into it.”
“Lotus. Fuck.” He wasn’t smiling when he set me down in front of the last door at the end of the building, but his eyes were darker and intense.
“Did I say something wrong? I guess it was stupid, the soil comparison. But that’s just me,” I said, then forced myself to stop the nervous babbling.
“Not wrong, not stupid. Too good, too right.”
His hand trembling, he fumbled before he managed to insert his key into the lock. He pushed open the door and flic
ked on a light switch on the wall just over my shoulder. The explanation for the highly oxygenated, yet somewhat elusive scent of him became apparent as I moved farther into the space and glanced around.
“You have a lot of plants.”
Succulents grew in colorful pots on built-in bookshelves. Rising from the floor were several parlor palms in basket containers. Macramé planters hung from the ceiling, one with pink orchids, and the other with purple African violets. Not overly fragrant, the flowers lent a romantic, powder-soft scent to the air. I knew from my dad that the ketone compound in the violets temporarily desensitized the receptors in the nose. One whiff gave you their fragrance, but subsequent ones gave you nothing.
Journey’s plant choices were as elusive and intriguing as he was. The more I learned, the more I wanted to know about him.
“I don’t have a view of the ocean, or a backyard, but inside I have the plants to look at.”
He shrugged as if having those plants weren’t a big deal. But it gave me incredible insight into him. No one had plants as healthy as his if they didn’t spend a lot of time taking care of them.
Bemused, enchanted, captivated by him, I stared at him as he dropped his keys in a bowl by the door and unhooked his wallet from his belt loop, setting it on top of the keys.
“I like your place.” I like you. A lot.
I swallowed to moisten my dry throat. He’d completely taken me by surprise.
“Thanks.” He turned to look at me. “I’ve been in this spot longer than most.”
I wanted to ask Journey about the other places. How long he planned to stay here. Why he’d chosen the plants he had—or any plants, for that matter.
Instead, I just walked to him, stepping out of my flip-flops along the way, and lifted onto my toes when I reached him. Wonderingly, I framed his face with my hands.
I had him. And this moment. I didn’t need to know those answers now. I just needed him and a kiss, so I went about getting one.
My fingers skimmed his beard. His whiskers were soft against my skin, and his lips were warm and firm. I pressed my mouth to his and swept my tongue across the seam between his lips. He parted them for me, and my legs trembled when his wet tongue met and slid across the tip of mine.
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