Now and Forever 4, The Renovated Heart

by Joachim, Jean C.

  He kissed her, sliding his hands down to her rear.

  Zoe came down the stairs, yawning but stopped abruptly, startled by their passionate embrace.

  “Mom!”

  Kit’s face flushed. She stepped back from Tunney. He grinned.

  “Good morning, Zoe,” he said.

  “How come you’re so dressed up?”

  “Work.”

  “Mom, your nightgown is obscene. Do you have to dress so sexy when I’m here? Can’t you keep that…part of your life private?”

  Kit ran upstairs.

  “Why do you have to be mean to her?”

  “Mean?”

  “I don’t get why you’re so mad at your mother.” He stopped, picking up his briefcase.

  “She drove my father away.”

  “You think so?”

  “Why else would he leave?”

  “Why don’t you ask him? Maybe it wasn’t your mother’s fault…certainly not hers alone. Don’t you think she’s suffered enough from the divorce?”

  “Not as much as I have. She has you, right?” Zoe narrowed her eyes.

  “What do I have to do with anything?”

  “Dad said Mom wouldn’t be affected much because she’s strong...said she’d pick herself right back up, get on with her life. He was right.”

  “Your mother has suffered more than you know. Cut her some slack.”

  “She looks pretty happy to me.” Zoe rested her hands on her hips.

  “Her happiness has come at a big price. It’s taken her six months to get here.”

  “So?”

  “Be nice to her. Your mother deserves your respect. Look at what’s she’s put together here for you.”

  “Not just for me…”

  “But it is. Buying this place, the renovations, everything…it’s all about you. It was always all about you, Zoe. Don’t you get that?”

  She clammed up, considering what he said.

  “I’ve got to get to work. Enjoy you day with your mom.”

  Kit returned, wearing her robe, in time to give him a goodbye kiss.

  “You’ll be back tonight, after work?”

  “Try to keep me away,” he said, smiling at her, nodding briefly to Zoe.

  “We’re having the rest of Christmas at Thanksgiving, too.”

  After he left, Kit tossed on a pair of jeans and a cashmere sweater. Slinging her arm around her daughter, they headed for the car.

  “How?”

  “Shopping!”

  They shopped for clothes for Zoe’s ski trip. Kit bought presents. Zoe bought a few things for her and Tunney too.

  Once home, they took lunch into the living room so they could listen to Christmas music while they wrapped presents in festive paper.

  “Tunney will be surprised when he gets home.” Kit sat cross-legged on the floor sipping hot chocolate, watching the lights on the tree blink.

  “The tree looks great. Thanks…thanks for doing all this. I know you did it for me.”

  Zoe sat down next to her mother and gave her a hug.

  * * * *

  Wednesday night snow started to fall. Tunney joined Kit by the tall window in the bedroom. Snug in their terry robes, they watched the snow drift down, visible only in the light of a streetlamp.

  She had everything for the holiday already in the house, so she wouldn’t have to go out in the snow. Johnny had teased her about her lists, saying she was obsessive/compulsive. Maybe, but she got things done. Tunney admired her ability to organize. She sighed, the sound of contentment.

  She felt safe, warm…yet sad. This year there’d be no Christmas Eve open house, cooking for fifty of their friends, like every year…no Christmas caroling in the snow with Zoe…no Christmas afternoon tobogganing on their favorite hill in Central Park. Johnny always worked on Christmas, so Kit and Zoe made family traditions together. This year there would be no family traditions.

  Tunney stood behind her, his hand resting on her shoulder. She turned into his embrace to bury her face as tears spilled onto his robe.

  “What’s the matter?” he asked, pulling her closer.

  “I’m thinking about the Christmas traditions I’ve lost this year.”

  “Time for new Christmas traditions.” He kissed her head.

  “Like a snake shedding a skin, only painful.”

  He hugged her. In a few minutes she calmed down. He kissed her forehead then moved south. She lifted her chin for his kiss then dropped her robe to reveal the black nightie with red ribbons underneath. He slid his hand down to her breast. A sigh escaped her throat. So far, they had refrained from making love with her daughter in the house. But Kit’s patience was gone; having him so close tempted her beyond reason.

  She opened his robe, sliding her fingers up his bare chest while his mouth caressed hers. He pulled her close, pushing the straps of the nightie down, exposing her breasts. She whispered.

  “Make love to me.”

  “Are you sure?” He raised his head to look into her eyes.

  “Ohhhh…yeeeesss.”

  “I’m finally getting to rip this nightie from your body,” he breathed, pulling the scrap of material down to the floor. He shed his robe on the way to the bed, leading her by the hand. He kissed her passionately, then slowly lowered her onto the silky sheets. She opened to his tongue. Her hands slid around his back, down to his butt. Kissing became caressing and kissing. His hands seemed to be everywhere. His fingers closed around the soft flesh of her breasts, then glided over her belly and between her legs, exciting her.

  He stroked her gently at first, then faster and harder. She squirmed under his expert touch.

  “I want you…I want you so bad,” he breathed, his breath warm on the sensitive skin of her neck.

  Hunger rose in her loins, she had to have him…soon. Her fingers wrapped around him, spurring him on, feeling him grow hard as granite with desire.

  His mouth devoured hers; there was a slight roughness, an urgency to his lovemaking. Waiting was rough on him, too. He slipped two fingers into her moist opening causing her to gasp with delight as heat sped through her veins. His chest crushed hers, his mouth nibbling from her neck to her shoulder as she gripped his back, her nails digging in. It was lust between them, pure, animal lust.

  He leaned over to grab a condom out of the nightstand. He slipped it on quickly, his breathing ragged. Kit wriggled in anticipation. As he approached her, she whispered, “Take me….oh, God…Tunney…please.” The ache for him threatened to spiral out of control. The heat grew inside her…she could lie still no more.

  “My pleasure,” he replied in a hoarse whisper.

  He pushed her knees up, hooking one leg over his shoulder while one hand trapped hers over her head. He thrust into her hard and groaned. She focused on the sensation of him inside her, moaning then cooing. The heat of their love consumed her, driving all thought from her mind. Kit was drowning in the dark pools of his eyes, where his lust mixed with his love. Her hips matched the movement of his as he thrust into her harder and stronger, groaning with every one until the intensity climbed up, up…out of control, her muscles clenching, pushing her into a mind-numbing orgasm. He placed his mouth over hers before she screamed his name.

  Sweat dripped off his forehead as he made a few more thrusts before exploding into release, groaning into her mouth. Afterward, she feathered a few light kisses and licks on his shoulder and neck, relishing the slightly salty taste of his skin and the scent of his sensuous aftershave.

  “Oh, I…you…”

  “I love you, Kit.” His eyes were almost black, somber, more serious than ever.

  “Oh, my…” A few tears leaked out of her eyes onto her cheeks.

  “Why are you crying? I just told you I love you.”

  “I love you, too.” She sniffled as he wiped her tears with his thumb.

  His lopsided grin returned, lighting up his face. He hugged her and kissed her hair.

  “That’s the best present you could ever give me,”
he whispered.

  They clung to each other, drifting into sleep together.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Snow still floated down from the heavens at eight in the morning on Thanksgiving Day, spreading a quieting blanket of white on the world. Kit awoke to find Tunney asleep with his arm around her. She stretched her legs and arms, feeling deliciously happy. He had declared his love for her, there was snow, and Zoe was here. Soon the great bird would be in the oven. She’d be humming carols while she cooked her favorite meal.

  Kit rolled over, snuggling up to him, pushing her breasts against his chest and winding her arms around his neck. He opened his eyes. A grin slowly took over his face, his mussed dark brown hair fell in his eyes. He squeezed her shoulder and nuzzled her neck.

  She raked her fingernails down his back, eliciting a moan from him. He rolled over on top of her, pushing the quilt down to his waist. She wrapped one leg around him. They shared a passionate kiss when the door burst open.

  “It’s snowing outside!” Zoe announced, standing in the doorway, struck speechless by what she saw.

  “Zoe!” Kit exclaimed, sitting up, covering herself with the quilt.

  “I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” she said, backing out of the room, closing the door.

  “Oh, God,” Kit groaned, falling back on the bed.

  They put on robes and padded downstairs to prepare breakfast. Tunney took out the bacon and eggs. He started the bacon first while Kit put on coffee.

  “Zoe, breakfast!” Kit called up to her daughter.

  “Not hungry!” The girl called down from her room.

  “Zoe!”

  “Not coming down” Zoe slammed the door.

  Kit climbed the stairs then knocked on Zoe’s door.

  No answer.

  “It’s me.” Her mother spoke through the closed door.

  “Don’t come in.”

  “Please, Sweetheart. Don’t hide. These things happen. Please, let me in.”

  Zoe unlocked the door. Her mom entered, closing the door behind her.

  “I can’t face Tunney.” Zoe hid her face in her hands.

  “So you came in when he was…kissing me. It’s just about love, honey. He loves me. Although you do need to learn to knock before entering a room, especially a bedroom.”

  “Not gonna do that again! All you were doing was kissing?” she looked out the window.

  “Yes.”

  “But he was…on top of you.” Zoe climbed onto her bed and crossed her legs.

  “Still, only kissing.” Kit sat on the edge of the bed.

  “Is that how you do it? Does the man get on top of you and kiss you first?” Zoe asked, still staring out the window.

  “Sometimes. It can start like that. It can start other ways…” Kit stammered, feeling color rise to her cheeks.

  “So he kisses you then he does it to you, right?” her daughter asked.

  “He doesn’t exactly do it to you; sex is about both people participating.”

  Kit looked down at her hands fiddling with the sash of her robe.

  “I don’t get it.”

  “You’re too young to get it. You’ll understand soon enough. Let’s not rush this.”

  “But I want to know.” She insisted, leaning forward slightly.

  “What else do you want to know?”

  Kit slid back on the bed, leaning against the wall.

  “What does an orgasm feel like?”

  “Where did you hear about…that?” Kit asked, her eyebrows shooting up.

  “Melissa and I overheard some of the older girls talking about orgasms.”

  “Do you know what it is?”

  “It’s the thing that happens to you when you have sex with a guy.”

  “Sort of…close enough,” Kit mumbled.

  “So…what does it feel like?”

  “Think of having an itch…one you can’t scratch for a while. Then all of a sudden, you scratch it.”

  “Yeah, so?”

  “It feels good, like when you can finally reach an itchy spot on your back…you scratch it…it feels so good? An orgasm feels like that, sort of…only better.”

  “So the man scratches your itch for you?” Zoe stared at Kit.

  Kit burst out laughing, embarrassing her daughter.

  “Sort of,” she said. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to laugh.”

  “Where does the itch come from in the first place?”

  “He creates the itch.” She faced her daughter.

  “He creates the itch with his…his…thing?”

  “No. With his hands, by touching you, nicely, gently, in certain places…and by kissing you.”

  “Oh, like feeling you up…making out. Then he scratches the itch with his thing?”

  “I guess you’ve summed it up. Sort of.”

  “But he has to love you first, right, before you let him scratch your itch?”

  “Oh, yes. Love first. Then birth control. But you’re a little young for this aren’t you?” Her brow knitted as she gazed at her daughter.

  “I’m almost twelve. I want to know…how it happens and stuff.”

  “You’re not planning on any of this…now…with a boy…are you?”

  “Relax, Mom. I’m only eleven.”

  She let out the breath she’d been holding.

  “Do you have a boyfriend?” Her gaze connected with Zoe’s.

  “Not yet…maybe soon.”

  “Take your time, honey. Have I answered all your questions?”

  “For now. I’m hungry.”

  Zoe got off the bed, heading for the stairs, followed by her mother.

  Once in the kitchen, they slid into seats at the table.

  “Chef Tunney presents…bacon and eggs,” he said. “What took you two so long?”

  “Zoe had some questions for me.”

  Kit went to the sink to turn on the hot water. She put the pan in to soak while her daughter tucked into her breakfast.

  “Oh?” he asked.

  He folded the egg carton down, returning it to the refrigerator. Kit motioned him to come to her at the sink.

  “She wanted to know what an orgasm feels like,” Kit whispered, her eyes twinkling.

  Tunney spit out his coffee in the sink. His face got red.

  “So I told her.” She grinned at him.

  “Too much information,” he said, moving toward the table.

  “Total truth, all the time, right?” she said, laughing.

  “Great bacon, Tunney,” Zoe called out from the table.

  * * * *

  After breakfast, Zoe went to a tall window in the living room to watch the snow. Sun shone brightly, making crystals of snow glitter like tiny diamonds. Frost on the window warned her the temperature had dropped overnight. Powdery snow invited her to jump in and play. The trees had a coating of snow on their branches, shading them, giving them depth.

  “A perfect day for sledding. Can we go?” Zoe breathed on the glass then drew a heart with her finger.

  “Let’s open presents first,” Kit suggested, knowing a sled and a toboggan were two surprises awaiting her daughter under the mammoth tree.

  After presents were shared, Tunney took her out in the snow to his favorite boyhood sledding hill. Kit hummed Christmas music while she started their Thanksgiving meal. Once the turkey was roasting in the oven, she put on her warmest clothes and went outside to make snow angels.

  Tunney lured the women into a snowball fight, winning handily. Wet clothing hung on a makeshift clothesline in the kitchen. Frozen fingers hugged warm mugs and cold bodies found comfort in flannel robes.

  The day seemed to fly by. Zoe seemed happier than Kit had seen her in months. They sipped gourmet hazelnut hot chocolate from Zabar’s, their favorite New York gourmet shop, basted the turkey, mashed sweet potatoes for a casserole and watched Miracle on 34th Street for the umpteenth time.

  The table in the lavender dining room was laden with a feast at about five o’clock. The tired three filled their emp
ty bellies with the sumptuous meal, perfectly cooked. Finishing up with a secret recipe pumpkin pie, they ate in silence for a bit.

  “I hope you won’t miss mom too much when she goes away,” Zoe said, glancing at Tunney while they munched on dessert.

  “What do you mean when she goes away?”

  He put a forkful of the delectable pie in his mouth.

  “I’m not going away, sweetheart.”

  “You are. You’re going to marry Daddy again…go on tour with him.”

  “Who told you that?”

  Her eyes widened as she stared at her daughter.

  “Daddy. He said he’s coming with a proposal for you. So I hope Tunney won’t be too sad. I’m glad you and daddy are getting back together.”

  “We’re not getting back together.”

  She tried unsuccessfully to keep her voice even but her rising temper brought the pitch up.

  Tunney stopped eating.

  “What is this, Kit?” Putting his fork down, he directed his questioning glance at her.

  “I don’t know. I have no intention of marrying Johnny again.”

  Kit shrugged but her heartbeat raced at the expression on his face.

  “That’s not what he said. He said after the proposal, everything’ll be good again. You’d join him on the tour. He said you could write your book and have what you want.”

  “That’s crazy.”

  Kit shook her head.

  “Are you getting back together?” Tunney’s eyes darkened, he placed his napkin on the table.

  “We’re not. Why are you saying this, Zoe?”

  “Daddy told me not to tell you. It’s a surprise. But I think you should know. I think it’s wonderful of him. I guess he misses you, Mom.”

  “He doesn’t!” Kit fairly hollered.

  A frown marred Tunney’s handsome face. He reached for his cup of coffee.

  “Do you still love him?”

  “No! I don’t.” Her hand balled into a fist.

  “But you have to. You have to!” Zoe’s voice became frantic.

  “I don’t have to. I don’t love him anymore. He doesn’t love me, either.”

  “No, no, no. You have to love Daddy. He said you did. He said you still would. He said…he said…”