by Young, M. L.
“What?” he asked.
“I need to tell you something,” I said.
“You’re not a man, are you?” he asked.
“What?” I asked.
“Sorry, I saw it once in a movie,” he said.
“I’m a woman, but before you go any further, and I think I know where you’re headed, I need to stop you and tell you something,” I said.
“You’re not interested in dating, are you?” he asked.
“What? No, that’s not it at all,” I said.
“Then you should hear what I have to say before giving your answer,” he said.
“I can’t do that. I need to be honest with you. After you hurt me at the gala, well, after Tom hurt me, really, I never thought I’d recover. You used me, lied to me, and most of all, hurt me. I never thought I’d see you again, at least not this soon, but then fate happened and we ended up reconnecting and getting to the point we’re at now. That’s what makes this hard,” I said.
He looked at me with a confused expression, and I could tell he was clearly nervous.
“When you first contacted me again, and we talked, people told me I should do to you what you did to me. They said I should use you to get some things that I wanted so you’d know how it felt for me. I hated the idea, I really did, but something about it stuck with me. Here you were, just after tricking me, and you really were going to face no repercussions other than being without me for a short while, and even that wasn’t really that long,” I said.
“So you were using me this entire time since we got back together?” he asked.
“No, not entirely. I got a few things out of you, or tried, rather, but I couldn’t get myself to do it all the way. I’m not the type of person to try to hurt you even though you really hurt me. Over time you showed me the type of guy you really are, the sweet guy who’s here with me now, and I forgot all about what I was doing. I was just being with you and nothing else. I was reminded of everything, though, and I couldn’t just let you go on without knowing. I had to tell you so I could get the weight off of my chest and my heart. I was going to do it before you asked me to be your girlfriend, which I think was coming, and I thought you’d do that in Seattle, but you never did,” I said.
Blake looked a little confused and slightly hurt as he sat there and tried to process what I’d said. He didn’t look at me, didn’t hold my hand, and didn’t try to get close at all. I was afraid this would happen. I was afraid he’d be pushed so far back that we’d never recover. I should’ve just listened to Nicolette. I should’ve taken this to my grave.
“So, you used me? Is that what you’re ultimately saying?” he asked.
“At the beginning, yes, both sexually and for a couple things. But I don’t think it’s anything close to what you did to me,” I said.
“You can’t keep using what I did against me, Penelope. I know what I did was wrong, but you know I regretted it and it wasn’t like that the entire time. I thought you forgave me,” he said.
“I did, I do, and that’s why I wish you’d forgive me for this,” I said, as tears started to stream down my cheeks.
“On one hand I want to be mad at you, but on the other I feel like I’m gridlocked, and I can’t. You basically got even with me, got back at me, and I deserve it for what I did, but I can’t shake it. I was going to ask you the one thing I haven’t asked in years. I was going to ask you to be my girlfriend, and to completely change myself for you. I was going to commit myself to you,” he said.
“And you still can. I want to be with you, Blake. I want to so badly,” I said.
“I don’t know, Penelope. I don’t know anymore,” he said, before standing up and walking around the table.
“Where are you going?” I asked, as I got up and followed him.
He went into his refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of water before taking a few chugs of it and tossing it in the trash. He looked distraught and hurt, and worst of all, it was because of me.
“I don’t think I can ask you that question anymore. At least not now,” he said, with his hand to his forehead.
“So that’s it? We’re over?” I asked, as I couldn’t hold my flood of tears back any longer.
“I don’t know. I think I just need some time to process all this. I think that would be best,” he said, before looking up at me.
“I guess I’ll get my things and leave,” I said.
“I’ll contact you when I’m ready to talk about this. Until then, please take care of yourself. I still care about you, a lot, but this back and forth thing that we’ve had with me hurting you, and then you getting revenge, and now being here, is just too much to process right now,” he said.
“Before I go, I just want you to know that it was all a mistake. I didn’t use you like you think. I got a few things, and you know I never ask for anything, and I used you for sex at the beginning. You’re the only guy I think about and the only guy I want, and if you choose to leave, you should know you’ll always be the one who got away to me. I’m sorry,” I said, before walking back over to the elevator and getting inside.
Blake watched me as the doors closed. I broke down with my back against the cold elevator wall and felt my face and body tense up like never before. I knew he was going to be pissed, but I never expected this. I didn’t think he could get this mad, even if I was a little scared of it before. I thought he’d be mad at me for a few days and then get over it. But I was wrong—dead wrong.
Nicolette wasn’t there when I got home, which was all the better. I didn’t text her, didn’t call her, but left a note taped to her bedroom door letting her know I was here and sleeping and to not wake me. I closed my bedroom door, put a bottle of water on my nightstand, got changed into my pajamas, and sat on the edge of my bed with a little lamp illuminating my room.
I put my hands against my face, rubbed it slowly, and took a few deep breaths as I tried to calm myself down enough to lie down.
I did, with my phone at my side, periodically checking it just in case Blake texted me and I didn’t hear the notification. He never did. As I opened my photos app and scrolled through his selfies and our pictures together, I couldn’t help but feel like I’d lost a piece of myself.
I knew this wasn’t, and couldn’t, be the end to our story. I knew this was just another hurdle we had to overcome that would make a great story one day. I knew I wanted to be with him and nobody else, and it wasn’t for his net worth and the things he had. I was falling for this man, and I wasn’t going to just let him leave me behind and move on with his life. I was going to salvage whatever I could, and we were going to come back stronger than ever.
I was sure of this, and I was sure of us.
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About the Author
M.L. Young is a New Adult Romance author currently residing in northern Illinois. When not writing, she enjoys horseback riding, sewing, and dreaming about the hot guys she writes about in her books.
M.L. loves interacting with fans, so interact with her! You can find her on Facebook, Twitter, and through e-mail!
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Table of Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourte
en
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
About the Author