Mushrooms

by Cameron Jace

  Jack gently pushed me away, “Yes, little girl.”

  “Watch it,” I tell him. “She is no little girl. She is badass.”

  “I know,” he says to Constance. “I saw her in the tunnel. She did a great job.”

  “You did a better job, surviving,” Constance says. “Or our boss would have collapsed, missing you.”

  I realize that I can taste the blood on Jack’s face. “What happened?” I ask him. “How did you survive?”

  “The Pillar told me how to get out,” Jack says. His eyes are straight, looking at me. He wants to know how I feel about the Pillar.

  “So he is dead?” I say, my voice low and weak. Why do I like this man so much?

  Jack nods. “It’s impossible to have survived the fire.”

  “Still, I am glad you’re alive,” I hug him again.

  “I think the first thing we have to do when we land isn’t getting the March to a doctor,” Constance says with a smile.

  “Then what?” Jack asks.

  “We have to get you two a room,” she sticks out her tongue then slaps Tom Truckle hard on the cheeks. “Imaginary boyfriend, you said? He doesn’t look imaginary to me.”

  “I need a phone!” Tom insists, humiliated.

  “We’re close to the warehouse,” the chauffeur says.

  “No warehouse,” Jack interrupts. He gazes back at me, hold my head in his hands. “The Pillar told me what to do next.”

  “He told you?” Constance is curious.

  “He said Alice has to find his Wonder,” Jack says. “The yellow paper he’d given her.”

  “His Wonder?” something tells me I never want to know.

  “He said it’s in a locker in King’s Cross train station,” Jack says. “It explains everything, he said.”

  “It’s one word,” I say. “How can it explain everything?”

  “Besides,” Constance says, “it would be suicidal going to the train station now with all the chaos outside.”

  “She is right,” I tell Jack. “My priority is not to know but to save the Mushroomers and the March.”

  “Exactly,” Constance says. “I don’t know what the Pillar had on his mind, but we’re all sure the March knows the whereabouts of the Six Keys.”

  “We do?” Tom Truckle asks, but no one listens to him.

  “The March is Patient 14,” I tell Jack.

  “I know. The Pillar told me. He knows where the Keys are and what they are for. So you don’t care about the note?”

  “Not now. Save the people first,” I turn to the chauffeur. “Is the warehouse safe from up here?”

  “It’s looks abandoned,” he says.

  “Perfect,” I reply. “Land us there,” I turn back to Jack. “You have a lot to explain.”

  “I will,” he says. “As much as I know,” he lowers his head. “I don’t even know how I am alive, but I will tell you what I know.”

  “And I will tell you what I know!” a voice squeaked behind Jack.

  All our heads turn to watch the March sitting up. He looks dizzy, not sure where he is. He isn’t even talking to us, but to the wall. His hands are flat on his laps as he says, “Mushrooms.”

  “March,” Constance approaches him slowly. “Are you okay? How did you wake up?”

  The March doesn’t talk to her. He doesn’t even know she exists at the moment. It's as if he is in a daydream, “Mushrooms.”

  Constance slowly sits in front of him to get his attention. He turns abruptly and grabs her by the arms. “I will remember what the Six Keys are when I see the Mushrooms.”

  “What?” She asks.

  “I am telling you,” the March says, sweating. “I will remember where and what the Keys are if you take me to the Mushrooms.”

  I sit next to him and pat him. “Where, March? Where are the Mushrooms?”

  He turns and looks at me slowly. “In London. One of my gardens. One of my designs.”

  Then he falls back into unconsciousness.

  14

  Past : The Poison Garden, Alnwick, Northumberland, England

  A month after Lewis Carroll had taken the Mushroom and passed his secret on to the March Hare, the Pillar sat smoking the best tobacco he’d ever had. A poisonous mushroom, one that needed an expert to smoke. Smoke too little and nothing happens. Smoke too much and A LOT happens: you lose your life.

  It was a special occasion. Not only had he gotten rid of Lewis — the Mushroom he’d given him had side effects, that Lewis wouldn’t feel now, but years and years from now.

  In fact, the Pillar was waiting for the Queen herself.

  Irritated, the Queen entered the garden in her wheeled cart, which had been protected by a certain magic, denying him the pleasure of killing her. They hated each other’s mushrooms, real bad.

  “Pillar,” she roared in her intolerable voice. “What do you want?”

  “Oh welcome, Queen of Hearts,” he said, leaning back on a pink pillow, set on top of a pink mushroom. He rested one leg on the other. “May I offer you a few chopped-off heads to eat?”

  “Stop it, tell me what you want.”

  “I think it’s what you want,” he grinned.

  “You sent for me. You said it was a matter of life and death.”

  “I also said I could offer you something that will make you smarter.”

  “Shush,” she waved at him, staring left and right. “No need to be so loud.”

  “I am sorry. You don’t want people to know you’re dumb.”

  “Shut up,” she approached him. “Do you have something for me?”

  “A magic mushroom.”

  “Magic mushroom?”

  “It’s a drug. Humans take it to go to La La Land, which is practically Wonderland,” he waves a lunatic’s finger next to his ear. “Wacko taco. Loony goony.”

  “So?” she grimaced. “How can this help me rule Wonderland?”

  “As I said, the mushroom has the power to make you smarter, devious, and calculating. I guarantee you no one will be a more evil bitch than you, my Queen.”

  “But I am not that dumb, Pillar.”

  “Let’s face it, my Queen, you’re an ugly woman,” the Pillar smiled, not an inch of anger in his voice. “You’re second best ugly next to the Duchess, of course.”

  “Well thank you,” she rolled her eyes.

  “Ugly people have no choice, my dear. You either become a tyrant and rule the world, or you become sort of a nerdy scientist. It’s the harsh truth.”

  “So what will this mushroom help me do exactly?”

  The Pillar set his hookah aside. He wiped his eyes awake and approached. Sitting on top of the mushrooms, he looked as is if he were upon his throne talking to a simple peasant instead of a Queen. “You will simply become the devil—” he itched his head. “I want to say the devil in disguise, but hey, there is nothing subtle about your ugliness.”

  “I swear I’ll chop your head off, Pillar, if you don’t stop insulting me.”

  “See? Once you take this mushroom, you will no longer need to chop people’s head off to feel good.”

  She shook her shoulders, “Then what do you expect me to do for fun?”

  “Have them chop their heads off willingly,” he grinned.

  She grinned back.

  It was an evil-fest of grins. Only the Cheshire was missing.

  “Okay,” she said. “I will take it, but I want this mushroom to help me get Alice.”

  “Alice belongs to Mr. Jay,” the Pillar said. “Don’t go after her. Go after power. After ruling the world. Soon we’ll have to cross over to the real world. This mushroom will make you outsmart humans.”

  She took a moment, contemplating.

  The Pillar, being a master seller, had to hit the iron while it was hot, “Listen,” he said, “whether your loyalty goes to Black Chess or the Inklings — which is unlikely — we all know what this whole Wonderland thing is about.”

  “What is it about, professor Pillar,” she shook her head left and
right, mocking him.

  “The Six Keys,” he said. “We all know that once any of us control them, he or she will be the most powerful in the world.”

  “Through the most precious thing in the world,” she sighed, looking nowhere for a moment. “I wonder why they call it the most precious in the world.”

  “It is,” he said. “You just don’t see it.”

  “Okay, Pillar,” she let out an impatient wheeze. “I will take the mushroom, but I don’t imagine you care about me, or want to give it to me for free.”

  “Of course, not. It could be poisoned.”

  “I don’t worry about that. I always let my dogs eat before me in case one of them dies from the food,” she said. “So cut the bloody crap, what do you want in return?”

  The Pillar shrugged, then said, “Your sister.”

  “What?” she bounced back. “Are you out of your mind?”

  “That’s a compliment in Wonderland ‘out of your mind,’” he replied. “But seriously, I love her.”

  “You love no one,” she protested. “How dare you ask to marry a royal girl like her.”

  “Believe me; you want me to take her away from you.”

  “What do you mean?” She said.

  “I know you hate her,” he began whispering, talking smoothly, addressing her emotional state, not the logical front she showed to people.

  The Queen didn’t deny it. Silence said everything.

  “She’s prettier, younger, and your father and mother love her more than you,” he said.

  She resided in a long silence, upset by him, but unable to deny his words.

  “The mushrooms will make you smart but will not help you get rid of her. Sooner or later they will make her rule, not you.”

  “Are you going to hurt her?” she finally asked.

  “I swear I will love her forever,” he said, knowing that she knew he was lying. But the Queen loved the throne more than she loved anyone.

  She nodded. A silent yes. “How can I give her to you? I mean she will not love you in a million years. She is young, true. Naive as well, but she won’t fall for you.”

  “I have a pink hookah,” he winked. “Girls love pink hookahs.”

  “Be serious.”

  “Here is serious,” he handed her another mushroom. “Feed it to her.”

  “Is it going to make her shorter, like the one you gave Alice, so my sister shrinks to your size?” she mocked him.

  “Nah,” he leaned back, all confident. “This mushroom will make her love me. I just need someone to convince her to eat it.”

  15

  Present: Warehouse location, London

  The warehouse is empty and looks safe — for now. We stuff the Mushroomers inside and Tom with them. Constance organizes everything and takes care of locking the outlets.

  Jack carries the March to the bed I made for him from roses. He is breathing, but still unconscious. His body seems weakened, but we don’t have food to feed him. I can’t imagine what he has been through.

  I sit next to him and pat him, “You’re going to be all right, March.”

  “A child in an old man’s body,” Jack commented. “I wonder how they had the heart to torture him in the asylum when he was patient 14.”

  “Black Chess doesn’t give a damn,” I say. “Or whoever wants those Six Keys.”

  “The Pillar told me that Lewis gave you one of the Keys,” Jack says.

  “Yes,” I let out a colorless laugh. “That was my first mission. The Pillar showed me the Tom Tower where I could cross over somehow and see Lewis.”

  “We’re too far to go there now.”

  “Lewis gave me a Key. Later, the Pillar took another Key from the Queen, the one I found in the basement from where I was raised,” I gaze into Jack’s eyes. “Which reminds me of Lorina and Edith.”

  “What about them?”

  “You like Lorina?”

  Jack rolled his eyes, “I was acting. I had to be believable to the Queen.”

  “Yeah, right,” I roll my eyes back. “I bet you still like Lorina. Boys always like her.”

  “Liked you mean.”

  “What?”

  “Lorina and Edith are dead, so is Margaret. The Pillar killed them.”

  I am in loss for words. With all the terrible things they have done to me, I am shocked. “He killed Lorina and Edith? I can understand Margaret, but my sisters?”

  “They aren’t your sisters,” Jack sits next to me and hugs me tight. “And they don’t deserve your sympathy,” his hand runs through my hair, his eyes not giving up on mine. Slowly, he leans forward and —

  “When I said get a room I didn’t mean next to the March,” Constance interrupts.

  I bury my head in Jack’s chest and laugh.

  “How is the March?” She asks.

  “No signs of waking up,” Jack says.

  “Could this thing on top of his head be the cause of all his misery?” she kneels next to him.

  “You think?” I leave Jack and look.

  “Could be, right?” Constance says. “Maybe all we need is to remove it.”

  “It’s stuck,” I say. “When we were in the asylum, he asked me to mush his head so he can remember. I can’t believe I did that. What was I thinking?”

  “But it has been there before, right?” she says.

  “Yeah,” I tell. “I think it’s always been there. The way the screws are bored into his head, I mean they’ve been there for years.”

  “Poor March,” Jack says.

  Constance kneels to inspect the cap on the March’s head, “I have a feeling this is what keeps him from remembering. Those screws are so tight into his flesh. Are those what gets attached to the electric pods?”

  “Yes,” I nod.

  “They are practically suffocating his head,” Constance says. “This is it. No two ways about it. Let me see if I can find any tools in this warehouse. We have to unlock it.”

  “Wait,” Jack says. “Before you go, shouldn’t we try to think about what he said in the helicopter?”

  “The mushroom hallucinations?” she asks.

  “He wasn’t hallucinating,” I tell her. “He said he would remember when sees the mushrooms.”

  “Which is total bonkers, and means nothing at all.”

  “He said someone told him that,” I tell her. “I think it might be the Hatter. In the asylum, he had this episode when he remembered how he loved the Hatter.”

  “I am not following,” she says. “How can someone remember something when he sees the mushrooms?”

  “Maybe we should get him mushrooms,” Tom suggests mockingly.

  Constance has her hands on her waist, but she isn’t going to hit Tom this time. She looks back at me, “Do you think it could be that easy?”

  I tilt my head. “Mushrooms to remember? It doesn’t make sense. If it were true, then anyone could have given him mushrooms for the last two hundred years. With all this torture he must have told Black Chess about the mushrooms at some point.”

  “Girls,” Jack interrupts. “I have been listening to you, waiting for this to go somewhere, but we’re forgetting something.”

  “What is it?” I ask.

  “He said the mushrooms are somewhere in London.”

  Constance mops her head with hands. “Stupid me. Yes, he did. So he is talking about certain mushrooms. This makes more sense.”

  “Whoever helped him forget, made sure a certain mushroom brings back the memory,” Jack explains. “The March didn’t remember where the Six Keys are but how to remember where they are. Brilliant.”

  “I agree,” I say. “Who could that be? Who planned it so meticulously?”

  “I hope not the Pillar,” Constance says.

  “The Pillar wanted the Six Keys like all of us,” Jack says. “It’s probably why he stuck with Alice all of this time.”

  My heart tells me this isn’t it. Though all evidence points to the Pillar being the scum of the earth, a manipulator, and partial
ly a devil on earth, I feel otherwise somehow. But I don’t comment.

  “So?” Constance asks. “Are we going to play survival all the time, hiding in this warehouse? We need to have a plan. Apparently waking the March up isn’t a definite option now.”

  “You’re right,” I agree. “We have to get moving, especially now that he’s given us a clue.”

  “A clue to mushrooms,” Tom snickers in the back.

  “It’s not a clue to mushrooms,” I stand up. “It’s not exactly about mushrooms.”

  “What?” Jack and Constance ask.

  “Mushrooms in London, you know what this is?” I ask them. “It’s an address.”

  Constance hits her forehead again. She has to stop that. “You’re right. We need to find a place in London that is famous for mushrooms.”

  “That’s why he said ‘his designs,’” Jack says.

  I feel so stupid. Maybe we’ve all been exhausted and couldn’t think straight. The March told us most of what we need to know in one simple sentence.

  “Stay here,” I tell Constance. “I am going out. I have to find that place.”

  “I am coming with you,” Jack says.

  “No,” I stop him. “They need you here. If I don’t make it, Constance is my second best. Take care of her.”

  On my way out, the door to the warehouse is slid open. We all go for our guns, but then stop. Our intruders are more than just a surprise.

  16

  King’s Cross train station, London

  The woman under the hood sneaked among the people like a cat. Left and right people were killing each other. Cults predicted the end of days — as if it hadn’t come yet. And thieves stole from every store around her.

  She paced, making sure she didn’t grab anyone’s attention. It would have made more sense if she hadn’t worn this hoodie, but she couldn’t come without it. She had to hide her face. She couldn’t show it to anyone. Trouble would occur instantly.

  She snaked her way into the train station. The trains had stopped running. None of the drivers were alive. She slithered and tiptoed and hid behind columns, knowing her destination.