by Rue Volley
Johnathan laughed, and they walked towards the stage.
***
I sat in my tent and looked at my hands. I kept opening them and closing them, as I swung my legs off the side of the bed. Sam peeked in and looked at me.
“Ready?” she asked me.
I took a deep breath and pushed myself up. I swayed a little, as dizziness swept over me.
Sam flashed to me and caught my arm. I grinned and looked at her.
“Are we okay?” she asked me.
I nodded and she walked me to the door. I stopped right before I stepped out, knowing that this was it, this was the last moment before I did this. This was forever. I took a deep breath, and we stepped out to the beautiful music. I walked slowly, although I suddenly felt like running.
We came around the corner and the wind picked up all the sweet smell of the hundreds of flowers on the ground and all over the stage. I looked up and Josh stood there, with Johnathan by his side. Theo, Kai, Lily, Jonah, and Brooke stood off to the side and smiled at me. I sighed and heard my breath in my ears. I started to walk towards him. I could only look at him in moments. I couldn’t stare… although he looked amazing, and everyone did. The day could not be more perfect… the flowers, the blue color draped everywhere.
I stopped, as Sam let my hand go, and I walked up the steps on my own. I looked at Johnathan and he looked at Josh. Josh nodded to him and Johnathan stepped past me. I touched his arm and he hugged me. I let him go and looked at Josh. We stood there facing each other on this beautiful night, smelling of flowers and honey, and I was shocked that my heart was not beating out of my chest. I mean, there we were. Doing this.
Josh looked at me and took my hands.
I looked down and saw that his hands were shaking. I looked up at him and leaned in.
“Are you okay?” I whispered to him.
He smiled and stared into my eyes.
“Rue Volley, I am giving you my light, my blood. I am here today to pledge everything that I am to you; to promise you that I will never let you fall. I will protect you with my dying breath. I will love you now, and forever.”
I looked at him and sucked in my breath.
I was about to start talking and he held his hand up to me… I guess he is not done.
I closed my mouth, and he continued.
Brooke leaned over to Johnathan and nudged him. He looked at her and she raised her eyebrows to him. He nodded and she stepped away. Theo looked back at her and at Johnathan.
“She has to pee,” Johnathan whispered.
Sam shooshed him and he straightened up and looked at the stage.
“Humans,” Theo muttered under his breath.
***
Brooke walked slowly to the edge of the tent, and then broke out in a run to where Johnathan had placed the jacket with the books in it. She leaned down and picked them up, running towards Theo’s tent. She broke through the opening and tripped, dropping the jacket and the books. She pushed herself up and looked down at the third book that had fallen open.
She leaned in and started to read it, and then she grabbed it up and read as quickly as she could. She flipped the page shaking her head, running her finger along the page under the words… trying not to miss anything. She dropped it, as the book continued to reveal words on the page…
…and Clytie approached the carnival with Sophia Graph… Clytie glitched and looked like Elie Graph again. She flashed forward and stepped up behind Johnathan, as he stood there staring at the stage...
Brooke ran as fast as she could towards the stage.
She stumbled and fell as she screamed out, but the music drowned out her voice.
***
I looked at Josh as he pulled a small box from behind his back and placed it in my hand.
“Happy Birthday, love,” Josh said, as I looked at the box and shook my head at him.
I forgot about my birthday… Why wouldn’t I? Every birthday marked an awful thing in my life. Every time something bad happened.
Johnathan turned as he felt a touch on his shoulder. He turned to see his mother with Sophie at her side. Sophie grinned and hugged him. Theo turned and looked at Elie Graph and pulled his blade. She pulled her blade and ran it straight through Johnathan’s heart. I looked as I heard the screaming from Brooke, as she rounded the corner. I dropped the box and started to run towards them, as Elie pulled the blade and sliced at Theo and cutting him across the shoulder. Sam kicked her back, and I lunged at Johnathan, who fell to the ground hard.
I scrambled to him as blades clashed over me. Josh jumped down from the stage and stumbled as he ran towards us. He held his side, screaming at me. I looked in Johnathan’s face, as he tried to speak to me. I leaned down and he whispered, “I will always love you,” in my ear. He relaxed in my arms. I cried out, as I stood up in a flash, and watched Theo battling with Elie. Her image glitched to me, and there she was… Clytie, at my ceremony… killing my Johnathan.
Theo hit her in the head and she stumbled. She looked at me and grinned, the ugliest grin that I have ever seen. She stabbed Theo quickly in the side, and he cried out. She flashed out of view, and I heard a scream behind me. I turned to see Brooke holding Johnathan in her lap, blood pooling on her beautiful dress. I scrambled back to him and leaned down over him, as I dropped to my knees. Johnathan grinned at me and then looked at Josh.
Johnathan held his hand up as it shook, and Josh reached out to him. Josh leaned down and Johnathan mouthed something in his ear. Josh shook his head. Johnathan pulled Josh to him and he fell. A bright light flashed, and I covered my eyes from its glare. Josh cried out, as he stumbled back from Johnathan, and I watched Johnathan’s color rise and enter Josh. It swirled all around him, and then quickly entered his mouth. Josh fell to his knees and fell forward, catching himself with his hands. The injury from his back started to rise from him, floating into the air. I stared at it as it left him, not knowing what had happened.
I looked at Johnathan. He grinned, and then his eyes closed. Brooke screamed out, as did I. I knew he was gone, I knew it. I just couldn’t even process it at that moment though. I stood up and stumbled away from him. I looked down at the blood on my dress, and my hands. I fell to my knees and looked at my hands again, blood dripping from them…
…If he had never known me, never come to me… he would be alive.
I dropped to my side and everything went to black.
Thank Yous
Thanks go out to all who have supported me.
Book three was very hard to write, and quite honestly, a low point in my life. But with the love and support of my closest friends, I was able to power through it and finish it.
To Holly Buckler, a great friend and awesome editor... Thank you for all the late night phone calls, and the words I needed to hear...specifically, "You cannot be broken."
To my Husband, who I ignored for months as he waited patiently, until I felt like returning to life. I love you, more than you will ever know.
To Jackae Johnson, who grounded me numerous times, and helped me feel as close to normal as possible.
To my family, Kimberly, Laurie, Melanie, and John...who have stood by me all of my life and supported me in everything I do. I could never ask for more.
To my brother, Joshua, for just being you, in a most fabulous way.
And, to all the others and you know who you are, who read as I wrote, and cheered me on.
Clarity
And
Reason
Rue Volley
The right of Rue Volley to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted by him/her in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988
No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means without the prior written permission of the publisher, nor be otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it was published and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.
Rue Volley
Cover Design by
Rue Volley
Model
Caitlin Kelley
Copyright© 2012
All rights reserved
Vamptasy Publishing
I dedicate this book to Rue & Joshua, who share a love eternal.
To my husband Von, who is the true Joshua Barrington and upon whom the character is based. How I was so lucky in life to find such a perfect match is beyond me.
Chapter 1
Shadowy Graves
My name is Rue Volley. I live in the sleepy little town of Calvary, nestled in a valley in Minnesota. The waters of Red Woods Lake lap right up to the edge of town and then drops off in points, like a cliff beckoning a jumper. The waters are deep enough to warrant a few lighthouses, one that we proudly display on the eastern edge of town. Its light is never ending, unmanned now… not like a hundred years ago when a family lived there, valiantly reminding sailors to be weary of the cliffs that could tear their floating homes to pieces… reclaiming them to our turbulent waters. We have majestic woods here, thick and daunting to some, but I always loved the forests that surround us. I love the sounds and the smell. Even at night. It never scared me, even as a child. The water laps against our shore, deep and reaching over the horizon. It is a part of the Great Lakes, ‘great’ being the key word. I have lived here my whole life. I know everything about it and it never had any surprises for me. I know the people; I know my house. I knew my school and all who went there. The population is large enough to be considered civilization, but small enough to allow for safety and comfort.
I stood here at the cliff’s edge and looked out at the dark water as it churned. It was early morning and the fog was still lingering behind me, lifting slowly… making it look like a beautiful painting… so beautiful, and yet a lie.
I leant down and picked up a stone that shimmered in my hand. The pale sun was rising and it reflected on the metal twisting through it. I stared at the stone in my hand and then I threw it over the edge. I leaned over, watched it drop quickly and with one small splash it was gone… like it never existed. I knew it; I’d touched it… but no one else ever would. Now it lives there… right where I’d put it. I sighed and looked out over the water and wondered how many live out there, peaceful… with no worry.
I paused when I heard a voice and tried to grin. Grinning really wasn’t my thing anymore. In fact, I had a small line above my left eye… resting right at the beginning of my eyebrow. It was deep, almost looked like an old childhood wound. I wished that it were. Physical scars are so much easier to forget than the ones in your heart. I can’t fix that, no one can.
I turned and looked at Josh. He stood there in black. I looked down at my dress, black too. I always loved to wear black before, yet this was the ugliest color to me now. A color that was a reminder… and I had come to hate reminders, I really had.
I started towards him and he looked at me, his face soft… no real expression. I didn’t have one on my face either. I didn’t know when I would, if ever. He held his hand out to me, and I walked past him, not taking it. I didn’t really think about it. It wasn’t meant to hurt him in any way.
I walked through the forest slowly and watched the fog swirl around my feet as I broke through it. It curled upward; I looked up at the treetops and narrowed my eyes. Some things never want to be done, but have to be. I was there at that moment.
I glanced back at Josh, and he followed me, watching me as I moved through the forest. I looked ahead as I spotted Theo, Sam, and Kai together and stepped up as I took a breath. Sam looked at me, and I looked away from her. I felt no real connection right then, not with anyone…or myself.
I looked at Johnathan… for the first time in five days. He lay there with his white battle gear on, his blades lying on his chest. They had placed him on a mirror, on a wooden table strung with flowers. He looked beautiful, like he was sleeping. The table looked like the one in my dream, well… in memory. Only there was no fire. I guessed I added that for my sake… shielding me from the truth of my premonition of this moment. I stared at his face and wanted to shake him, wake him up. Tell him to come home with us… with me. I wouldn’t even care if he left us, went to school… ran his father’s business.
I glanced at Brooke who stood there swaying on her feet. I felt for her. She was on the edge of something with him. The same ‘something’ as I once had been before her. As still was at that moment.
Theo stepped forward and looked at him and looked at the sky. The spot they chose to do this was beautiful. The trees parted there, just enough to show the sky. The sun was still rising and the sky was streaked with color, all of them blending together. It looked like it would be a beautiful day… yeah beautiful, except for this moment.
I looked back at Theo as he raised his hands and color started to rise around the mirror and Johnathan’s body. It looked like flame, blue and white… twisting in no real pattern to follow. I suddenly felt the weight of this moment hit my chest, and I lunged at Johnathan and touched his face. Josh moved towards me and Sam placed her hand on his shoulder. He stopped and looked at her. She shook her head, and I leaned into Johnathan’s face and stared at it. I touched his cheek and then his lips.
I guess this is it.
This is the moment that I have to say goodbye to him.
I leaned up in his ear and whispered to him. “I want you to know that I love you. If I could have saved you, I would have. I want to thank you… for what you did. I do,” I said as I backed away from his face.
Then it happened, I leaned in and kissed him. Josh looked at the ground and crossed his arms on his chest. I didn’t really think about anyone being there at that moment, it was Johnathan and me. Just us… like it was in the beginning, before all the crazy, before I knew of what I am… before Josh.
I slowly took my lips from his and looked at his face. I started to cry, but it was the first grown up cry I had ever had. It was silent, and only contained tears. I stepped back and looked at Brooke. She tilted her head and touched her eyes with her tissue, well looked like a half a box of them… wadded in her hand. I hoped she understood. I hope she knew that I didn’t mean any harm. Ha… harm and me. Yea, I seem to be the reason for this.
I wished that he had never known me. If I could have changed that, I would.
Theo cleared his throat and I looked at him and then he glanced to Josh. The look he gave me told me that he wasn’t okay. I wasn’t either, so I guess it is an even playing field now. Theo looked at Johnathan and continued to chant in Latin. I didn’t know the words, and even if I did I wouldn’t have heard them. It sounded like music to me… slow and steady, beckoning Johnathan home.
I picked up a handful of flowers and placed them next to Johnathan and the color continued to thicken around him. I stepped back out of churning energy, and I watched as he slowly started to sink into the mirror as it waved like water under him. Brooke suddenly lunged towards him with flowers in her hand and threw them on him. She started to sway, and Sam and Kai flashed to her and caught her before she hit the ground. I watched them lower her slowly as her head fell back.
I turned and started to run, not flashing as I could have… but running. I pushed through the forest and stumbled over fallen tree limbs and other debris under my feet. I could have simply jumped it all, but I wanted to struggle through it. A thin branch scratched my cheek and I felt the sting of it. I placed my hand on my cheek and felt the small amount of blood well up under my fingers. I pushed as hard as I could until I found myself back at the cliffs edge. I stopped and looked out over the water, wishing that if I jumped, it would matter. But no… I was immortal and that was not enough to kill me. I stood there breathing hard; I touched my chest and looked down at the water below me. I closed my eyes, and then I heard his voice and I turned.
Josh stood there, looking tired, dark circles under his eyes. His body looked smaller, if he doesn’t stand up straight it does. I looked
at him and continued to breath.
“I want to say something that will matter, but words are nothing more than that… just words,” he said to me.
“I don’t have any words,” I said.
Josh stepped towards me.
“Well, that was five words from you… more than you’ve said in the last five days.”
I would have smiled, but I didn’t know where that was… the smile I mean. I looked at him and shook my head.
“I can’t do this,” I said to him.
He held out his hand to me and tilted his head.
“What can’t you do… Rue?” he asked me.
I didn’t answer him. I suddenly felt the need to swim. Weird, right? I am so not the swimmer. The cliff behind me called out to me like a siren.
I turned and flashed forward and dove from the cliff. Josh moved so quickly, I don’t even think that his feet touched the ground. He simply jumped off after me. He caught me in the air and pulled me to him. I crossed my arms and sank into his chest, truly feeling freedom as we fell towards the churning water below us. Josh rolled and placed me away from the water and hit the surface with great force. I felt him moan as his back took the blunt of the fall. We went under and he lost his grip on me. I rolled in the bubbling water and did the one thing you should never do under water… I took a breath as I always do. I have very few talents, but drowning is something I do very well.
My eyes rolled in my head as my lungs filled with the icy cold black water, and I felt my body jerked upward before I really lost consciousness. I felt a slap on my face and then another. I felt my body being leaned over and hard slap to my back. I spit out a ton of water and then sucked in my breath as it burnt like fire in my lungs. I cried out and slammed my hands against the sandy shore. Then Josh jerked me up and made me look at him as he gripped both of my arms, harder than I would have preferred.