by Rue Volley
“What the hell?!” he yelled at me.
I blinked and looked at him through blurry eyes and coughed again.
“You tell me that you love me now,” he said, with panic in his voice.
I blinked and he shook me.
“Rue… say it!” he screamed.
I shook my head and looked into his eyes.
“I… I love you,” I said.
He pulled me to him and held me close. I could hear his heart beating hard in his chest. I sighed and my lips started to shake from the shock of the water. He held me there and then I felt it. He was crying. Not a ‘I’m a guy and I don’t want anyone to know’ cry, but a terrible one… the kind that takes your breath away from you. I backed up from him and placed my hands on his face and stared into his eyes as tears streamed from them.
“Don’t,” I whispered to him.
Josh tried to catch his breath, and he closed his eyes. His face looked contorted like he was truly in pain.
“I told him not to… I told him no,” he said, as he tried to catch his breath.
“Josh… you don’t have to do this,” I said to him.
“No… no. I do… I do,” he said, as he shook his head.
“If I had been on point, as I always have… he would be here. I would have felt it, I would have. I would have killed her, and he would be here,” he said.
I tried to hold him, but he started to slump to the ground. I went down with him, and we both ended up on our knees.
“I know you loved him… maybe more than me. I would have traded places with him… for you, I would have,” he said, as he stared at the sand and dug his fingers into it.
“No… no. That is not what I wanted, Josh,” I said to him.
He looked up at me, his eyes filled with tears and his face strained. The dark circles made him look like he was starving to death… and perhaps he was. He was starving because of me. I was starving him of my affection and support. I had closed myself off to him, so suddenly that I think that he had no choice but to suffer. I had left him to die a slow death, one that I would never wish on him or anyone for that matter.
“Josh,” I whispered. “I need you.”
“Then why did you jump… you jumped, to die right?” he said as he stared at me, his lips shaking. I looked at his mouth and shook my head.
“No… I wanted to swim,” I said to him.
He slowly looked down at the sand and his body shook. At first I thought he was crying harder, but then he looked up at me and he was laughing… laughing so hard he made no noise at first. Then it rolled out of him like thunder. I nodded to him and felt my mouth pulling up into a smile… I continued to nod and he shook his head at me.
“You wanted to swim,” he said as he caught his breath.
“Yes… I’m no good at it. I seem to drown in the water every time,” I said to him.
“Oh, goddamn it, Rue… you wanted to swim,” he said.
I stared at him and relaxed in the sand. He looked at me and lunged at me. He kissed my mouth, forcing his tongue inside quickly. I ‘mmm’d’ and fell back with him on me. He touched my face and moaned at my mouth. I wanted to fall into him, really lose myself in him… but I held back. I was not ready to open my heart back up. I just couldn’t. I wanted to, so desperately, but the pain of loss has blackened the sun.
Josh stopped kissing me and held me there on the sandy shore. I shivered and he did too… the cold reality of the day settling into our bodies. He leaned up and gently moved my wet hair out of my face. I took a breath as I looked at his perfect face. He stared at me, like he had before. That look of needing me. I wanted to be that for him. I wanted him to know that I would always be there for him, but once again my words don’t come to me… new for me… no words, no instant honesty.
He started to pull himself up and held his hand out to me. I took it, and he pulled me to him. I took my hand from his before I realized it, once again cutting him off from me. I had to work on that, but first I needed to work on me. I had to swallow reality, the new one I mean, the one that had hit me in the head and left me rolling on my side in pain. I looked at him and then we heard a shout from overhead and we both looked up. Theo leaned over the side and looked down on us.
“And why would we be at the bottom of a cliff?” Theo asked.
Sam and Kai looked over and stared down at us too.
Josh waved his hand and looked at me.
“Rue wanted to swim,” he yelled back to him.
Theo quickly pulled back, as well as Sam. Kai shook his head and then jerked back too. I bet that Sam pulled him. I looked at Josh and rubbed my arms.
“I am freezing,” I said to him.
He wrapped his one arm around me. We started to make our way up the sandy shoreline, intermixed with rocks… and headed towards the lighthouse. I looked up at it and watched the light swing around and then disappear on the other side.
“That lighthouse has been here for at least a hundred years,” I said, as we carefully navigated the shore, becoming more and more stone filled.
Josh looked up at it and smiled.
“I know… actually that lighthouse has stood for one hundred and twenty-three years,” he said.
I looked at him. He pulled me up as he jumped a large boulder, and we landed on the other side. He let my waist go and kept walking.
“How do you know that?” I asked him.
“Well, I have lived a long time. Believe it or not, I sailed at one point… just from boredom, but I did,” he said.
I stopped and looked at him.
“Had you been here before...? To Calvary, I mean?” I asked him.
“I saw it from the ship I was on, never stepped on shore,” he said.
“Oh,” I said to him.
Josh looked at me and grinned.
“What?” he asked me.
“Oh, I don’t know… I just can’t see you sailing,” I said.
Josh stopped and looked at me.
“Why is that?” he asked.
“You don’t seem like a person who would like to be on the water.”
Josh shook his head and water flew from it. He rubbed his hair and it stood up, in a messy kinda way. I glanced at him and noticed how cute it looked.
“I love the water; I always have,” he said to me.
I bit my lip and looked up at the lighthouse. It reached towards the sky, towering over us. I covered my eyes and stared at it.
“Well, I don’t… it tries to kill me every chance it gets,” I said, as I walked towards the stairs leading up to the door on the side of the lighthouse.
Josh laughed, and I looked back at him.
“Oh, I’m glad you think it’s funny,” I said.
He shook his head and looked at the door.
“No, it’s just you… You hate it, so you jump in it as often as you can,” he said.
“Maybe I just think that one of these times I will swim like a fish,” I said.
Josh opened the door up and it creaked.
I peeked into the dimly lit room and back at him.
“I would expect you to fly before you swim successfully,” he said, as he waved his hand to me and I stepped into the small room.
I glanced around and saw a small cot against the wall. An old metal stovepipe, designed to cook and heat, sat along the other wall and blankets lay folded up neatly on the cot. I looked back at Josh, and he closed the door behind him, cutting off even more light than we already had. I walked to the metal staircase and placed my hand on the railing. I looked up and it made me dizzy as my eyes followed the staircase, as it twisted upward to the top. I looked at Josh and swayed a little.
“Vertigo,” I said to him.
Josh looked at me.
“Well, then maybe we shouldn’t… climb,” he said, as he followed me.
I left him and started up the stairs before he could finish his sentence.
I held onto the railing tightly. My hand started to sweat, and I crossed my other hand over me t
o hang onto it, as I wiped my sweaty one on my dress. Josh caught up with me quickly, and I could feel him right behind me. I tried not to look up; every time I did I felt my blood do weird things in my head. It made me dizzy.
I sighed and pushed on. I want to make it to the top, so that I can really see everything. The lighthouse stood on a hill, jetting upward on the highest points of the cliff running along Calvary, sharply dropping off to the rocks and sand below. I noticed more light as I climbed and finally came to a thick glass door. I tried to push it open, but the wind up this high was fighting me. Josh stepped in front of me and opened it easily. I felt the wind hit my face and stepped out onto a metal platform, surrounded by a chest high railing. I moved forward, ignoring the wind as it tried to move me, and grabbed the railing in front of me. Josh closed the door and stepped to me quickly, placing his hand on my waist and wrapping his fingers to cup my side.
We stood there and I looked out over the water, higher than I ever had before. I don’t know why I never snuck off and climbed this lighthouse before. I knew it was here; I loved it… but I acted like I didn’t care. That was problem right there. I loved it, and I never paid attention to it. I sighed and watched the water churn from the wind picking up.
I looked over and Josh had his eyes closed. He was breathing in the smell of the water, and he looked peaceful. I guess he did like the water, I never knew that. I guess I didn’t ask. Josh is not one to just give up all his secrets; you kind of have to ask questions to get to it. He opened his eyes like he knew I was looking at him and turned to me.
“Beautiful isn’t it,” he said to me.
I grinned a little. I mean he was right, it was beautiful up there. I looked out over the water and noticed a dark shape in the water, it was actually quite large. I leaned forward and narrowed my eyes as I focused on it.
“What is that?” I asked him, as I continued to try to figure out what it was.
Josh looked at it and sighed.
“That is Grace. The ship I sailed on,” he said to me.
I looked at him. “Grace?” I said.
He nodded and looked back at the ship’s ghostly shadow under the deep water.
“Yes, she sank here… some years ago,” he said.
I turned to him and waited. I want to know the story. I guess he knew I was waiting, so he looked at me and took a breath.
“I sailed on her for about twenty years. I actually liked the crew. They were good men, working for their family’s sake. I don’t even know if they loved the water as I did. I just know that they loved the ship,” he said.
“What happened?” I asked him.
“Weather… mother nature, as humans call it,” he said.
“So a storm took the ship out,” I said, as I looked at the ships shadow.
“Yea, I knew it was bad. I tried to warn them, but there was a harbor up the coastline and we were behind schedule. The captain thought that we could do it. So we left safe harbor and sailed here,” he said.
I smelled the air, slightly salty, and watched the birds flying overhead.
“This is not the sea,” I said to him.
“Water is water, and a storm does not care whether it is open sea or one of the Great Lakes. In fact, the storms here rival the sea’s weather most days,” he said.
“So what happened to the crew?” I asked him.
“Resting,” he said.
I looked back at the ship and suddenly realized that I was standing next to the only person who had left the ship that day.
“So they all died then,” I said, more to myself then to him.
“Well, all but one. I saved one and dragged him to shore; I never touched the land though. I wish I had that day. If I had, I would have known that Grace and William were here. Things would have been different if I had done that… just stepped on land,” he said.
“Who did you save?” I asked him.
“I saved a Graph… the one who pretty much founded the town. Henry Adda,” he said to me.
“Holy shit,” I muttered.
“So Henry Adda was real?” I asked him.
“Yea, but no immortal. He was just a man. He built the Graph house and loved his wife so much he took her name instead of the other way around. It was actually a big scandal at that time. Men did not do that,” Josh said.
“How did you know all this?” I asked him.
“I followed the news; I wanted to know how he did after I dragged him to shore. I returned to the ship and wasn’t able to save anyone else. All the power that I have and water took forty-five lives that day, right out from under me. That is why I stopped sailing, but I never lost my love for it. I just feel as if the water rejected me that day, and I never tempted fate again,” he said.
“Josh,” I said as I placed my hand on his face.
He looked at me and closed his eyes.
“You saved Johnathan that day, by making it possible for his mother to be born.”
Josh opened his eyes and looked at me.
“Yea, I thought of that. I saved him just to watch him die, as once again I was weak,” he said.
I hugged him and tried to comfort him. I knew that my energy felt weak to him now… it felt weak to me too. I wanted him to know that I do appreciate him though. Everything he has done, what he is… how he is compassionate when everything in him would push him in the opposite direction. I pulled back from him and smiled, forcing my teeth to show.
“Let’s go back to the carnival,” I said to him.
He grinned and touched my face.
“I do love you, Rue Volley,” he whispered.
“I know that you do,” I said, as I turned to the door and waited for him to once again pull it open, the wind fighting us every step of the way.
I glanced back at the shadowy grave under the water and sighed as I realized that my short memory of Johnathan was nothing compared to what Josh knew of him… or ever would be.
We walked back towards the forest, and I stopped at the edge of it. Josh looked at me and squeezed my hand.
“There is no other way; we have to pass through the trees to get to the carnival, Rue,” Josh said.
I nodded to him and took one step in and stopped again, as I pulled my hand from him and looked down.
“Come here,” Josh said, as he reached out to me.
He picked me up, and I wrapped my arms around his neck. I looked at him, and then laid my head against his chest. He started to move, and I closed my eyes as I felt him pick up speed. He flashed through the woods as quickly as he could. I peeked at one point at the blur of trees passing us by and buried my face again. I have always loved the forest… always loved Red Woods. I always told myself that even if school or whatever I decided to do with my life took me from Calvary, I would return there, not only to visit my parents, but to walk the forest and take in the peaceful feeling it brought to me.
Now I lay there, clinging to Josh’s neck, with my head buried not wanting to look at Johnathan’s resting place. It will forever be a grave to me now. A dark and empty place, just like that ship is to Josh just off shore… a shadowy reminder that we are not able to save every one. Death is always just a step away, even to immortals such as we are.
Chapter 2
457
Clytie fell on her knees and cried out as she slammed her fists into the ground. She looked at her arm and hissed when she touched the long cut on it. Theo had gotten one good swipe in on her before she ran. Running was not really her thing, but Sophie had put her in a bad spot. She had told her to hold back; she told her to pace herself. If Clytie had been able to show her true form to Sophie, perhaps she would have listened to her.
Sophie Graph, a brat like every other human girl Clytie had encountered. No different than Rue. What was she to do now? Return to Caine and tell him that only one had fallen? That she was only able to strike at the traitors with one fatal blow? No. She had to go back and get Sophie. To return without her and only be able to tell him that his son had fallen was not t
he plan. The truth was she wanted Rue Volley dead.
Rue… the girl who had trapped her in memory. Rue, the only one who had beaten her truthfully. Clytie owed her, for the years of torment and the obvious obsession both Joshua Barrington and Caine had for her. Although Caine had told her to kill them all, she knew… as she always would, that Caine would prefer Rue by his side, not her. That in itself was enough to infuriate her.
She stopped thinking about her hate when she heard rustling in the trees and stood up; gripping the blade Caine had given her.
“I would suggest that you show yourself, before I make waste of you!” Clytie yelled out to the darkening forest.
Clytie heard giggling and turned quickly when she caught a flash to her right. She tried to follow it, as it disappeared into the darkness.
“I am Clytie, mate to Lord Caine of Valon… I insist that you show yourself immediately!” she yelled out.
A small girl emerged from the trees and tilted her head, as she stared at Clytie.
Clytie held onto her blade tightly, as she stared at the small girl.
“What is your name?” Clytie asked her.
“What is your name?” the girl repeated to Clytie, as she giggled.
Clytie sighed and looked at the blade in her hand. She started to lower it slowly and a boy emerged immediately and stopped next to the girl. He looked down at her and grinned. He touched her face and looked back at Clytie.
“You say that you are mate to Lord Caine?” the boy asked her.
“Yes, that I am,” she said.
The boy shook his head and started to pace in front of her.
“I would guess that you are unaware of Lord Caine’s plans,” the boy said to her.
Clytie tilted the blade in her hand as she watched the boy.
“What plan do you speak of?” Clytie asked him.
“The one where you die,” the boy said to her.
Clytie drew in her breath, but held her emotions in check. This could be a trick, well of course it could be. These two creatures had a weird energy about them, obviously not protectors fully, she could not be sure. Clytie decided to lower her blade to hopefully ease the tension. The boy looked at the blade in her hand and grinned.