Elijah studied the happy, smiling faces of the two men, and an unwanted feeling of melancholy threatened to overwhelm him.
No, men like Elijah never found their happy ending.
That happened to nice, handsome men like Jackson… not to ex-porn stars like himself.
Elijah gently placed the framed picture down on the bar and gave Jackson one of his best, well-practiced smiles. "It looks like you both were very happy together."
Jackson's gaze roamed over his face for a few moments before he answered. "We were."
"What happened?"
Jackson sighed and pushed his empty plate away. "He was broadsided by a high school kid who ran a red light at the intersection of Main Street. It was foggy that morning and the kid was late for school. Apparently the kid never noticed the light had changed and so when he hit Ben's car, he was going faster than the speed limit. Ben never knew what hit him. He died instantly at the scene," he said, looking at him with pain–filled, green eyes.
He gave a one shoulder shrug and took a deep breath before continuing. "At least the kid survived. He was in the hospital for months, and they thought he too would pass away. But, from what I understand, he has some brain damage and he's working hard to overcome it."
Elijah was amazed by Jackson's concern for the driver whose recklessness took away the love of his life. He didn't know if he could ever be that generous, whether it was an accident or not.
"I'm sorry, Jackson. I wish I knew what to say to make things better, but I don't. I know you must be angry and resentful toward the kid that was driving."
Jackson shrugged and slowly shook his head. "No. It was an accident, Elijah. It could have happened to anyone. The kid was an inexperienced driver and unfortunately because of a simple mistake, he has to live with what happened for the rest of his life. His life changed as drastically as mine did. Obviously, I wish it had never happened, but it did… and I can't change that. Resenting and hating that young man wouldn't do me or him any good. Besides, Ben wouldn't have wanted me to feel that way."
Elijah didn't know if he could be as forgiving as Jackson was. Jackson probably experienced more sorrow than he ever had, and that was saying a lot. Once again, Elijah was humbled by the forgiving nature and sweetness of the man sitting next to him. He'd never been around someone as pure of heart as Jackson was, and it surprised him.
Not knowing what to say, Elijah placed his hand on Jackson's arm and gave it a gentle squeeze. Jackson's eyes widened a fraction before the older man gave him a small smile.
"Okay, that's enough about this old man. Tell me more about you."
Elijah reluctantly let go of Jackson's arm and placed his hand back in his lap. "There's really not much more to tell. I've been looking for a job, and I plan on furthering my education in the fall."
"Really? That's great, Elijah. Are you planning to attend College of the Ozarks?"
Elijah's face burned from embarrassment. Once he told Jackson the truth, Jackson would probably think he was an idiot.
Elijah looked down at his uneaten waffles and shrugged. "Um… no. When I was fifteen, I got involved with the wrong crowd and dropped out of school. Since then, I've lived my life on the edge. I got addicted to drugs, was involved with some shady people, and I've done many things I'm not proud of. I've somehow managed to get away from all of those bad influences, and I moved here for a fresh start. I want to hopefully get my G.E.D. and maybe then go onto college if possible."
Suddenly the food that Elijah had eaten was like a lead weight in his stomach. Even though he was intentionally sugarcoating most of his shady past, he probably sounded like a loser with no hope for a successful future. He figured his questionable past and lack of education would probably turn off the handsome and settled Jackson.
He was surprised when a warm hand softly clamped down on his shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. "I think that's a great idea, Elijah." Jackson's voice sounded firm and reassuring. Elijah glanced up from his uneaten food into the older man's kind gaze. "I think it's admirable that you want to make a better life for yourself. If you need any help with anything, let me know, okay? I'd be glad to help a new friend like you out if you need it."
The knots in Elijah's stomach immediately loosened upon hearing Jackson's kind words. As he gazed into Jackson's face, he couldn't help but smile from the fortunate turn of events happening in his life. It would be good to have a friend like Jackson, and for first time in his life, the feeling that he really was going to escape from the hell of his old life made warmth fill his chest.
Jackson's sparkling green eyes crinkled a little at the sides as he returned Elijah's smile.
Soon he relaxed and they talked about everything from sports to movies to even Shep. Elijah began to believe that maybe there would be hope for him to have a normal life after all.
Chapter Three
Jackson drove his six-year-old burgundy Nissan Altima into the small shopping center parking lot. He spotted his friend's Jeep Wrangler in the far corner and parked beside it. He turned the car off, grabbed his laptop and briefcase, and opened the car door.
As soon as he stepped out of the car, he immediately smelled the delicious aroma of baked goods and pastries. Jackson's stomach chose that moment to growl, loudly proclaiming he hadn't eaten anything since supper the night before. Instead of going toward his own business, he headed next door to his favorite bakery, Yummy Indulgences, so he could grab a couple of doughnuts, a steaming cup of coffee, and maybe have a few words with the owners, who happened to also be his friends.
The fact that his small accounting business, Edwards Accounting, was located next door to the best bakery in the River Valley was a bonus for Jackson.
It was really good to be close to such good and caring people.
He opened the door and was greeted by the light, happy-sounding jingle. He gazed into the colorful interior of the shop and was welcomed by his two friends' friendly waves.
"Good morning, guys," Jackson said. He strolled over to the gleaming counter filled with delicious-looking delicacies behind the glass.
At first glance, Allen and Shiloh Garner-Ballard appeared to be total opposites. Allen stood several inches taller than the diminutive Shiloh. Allen had a toned, muscular body from years of hard labor, whereas Shiloh had a lean frame. Allen preferred jeans and t-shirts, while Shiloh wore colorful and soft clothing that flattered his slim body. Allen's face looked ruggedly handsome with his constant five o'clock shadow enhancing the contours of his face. His hair was cropped short in a no-nonsense cut, while Shiloh had a little longer than chin-length black hair, and a he always wore a mischievous grin that spoke of his zest for life.
Allen was often quiet and unassuming and Shiloh was loud, flirty, and flamboyant. But, as different as they appeared to be, they worked well together and were obviously crazy about each other. Many times Jackson witnessed Allen wrapping Shiloh up in his large arms and comforting him after a long, hard day. Jackson enjoyed watching Shiloh gently tease Allen, making his husband relax and become more playful. They were two wrongs that somehow made a right.
"Jackson! How are you, sweet thing? Did you have a good weekend?" Shiloh asked. His soft voice always sounded soothingly lovely. Between his pretty petite-ness and bubbling personality, he never failed to bring a smile to his face.
Jackson nodded. "I did have a really good weekend."
Shiloh raised his perfectly arched, dark eyebrows slightly. "Oh… it was a really good weekend, was it? Hmmm. That's interesting," he cooed playfully. He winked at him and turned toward Allen. A quick knowing look passed between them, and then Allen poured them all some delicious goodness.
Jackson fought the urge to wince. He used to have that special connection with Ben. He remembered the silent communication and how they used to finish each other's sentences.
He missed that.
Maybe if you take a chance, you could have that again.
"There's nothing really interesting about it," Jackson denied. "
I had a typical weekend, as usual. The only thing that wasn't normal about it was meeting my new neighbor." He hoped he outwardly looked calm and nonchalant, instead of bursting with the excitement singing through his veins.
Jackson really liked Elijah, but knew he was too old for him.
Are you sure? A voice that sounded a lot like Ben's asked inside his head.
Yes, damn it!
"Ohhh, a new neighbor?" Shiloh grinned. "So how cute is he?"
Jackson couldn't help but chuckle at Shiloh's obvious tenacity. The smaller man's stubbornness was one of the reasons why Jackson liked him.
"What makes you think it's a he? Or that he's cute?" Allen walked toward Jackson with a large steaming cup of coffee. He set his briefcase down on the floor and graciously took the cup from Allen with a smile of gratitude.
Shiloh cleared his throat, and when Jackson glanced down at him, he couldn't help but chuckle. Shiloh had his delicate hands on his lean hips and tapped his foot while he waited for Jackson's answer.
"You might as well tell him," Allen said. "He'll drive you crazy until you do." He winked at his lover and then laughed when Shiloh stuck his tongue out playfully.
Jackson couldn't help but chuckle at both of his friends' antics. He took a sip of the flavorful, hot coffee and nodded at the impatient Shiloh. "Yes, my nosy friend, Elijah's very cute," Jackson admitted. "But he's much too young for me. Elijah's also trying to get his life together, so the last thing he needs is an old man like me drooling over him." Jackson sighed and gave Shiloh a small shrug.
"How young is too young?" Shiloh asked.
"Well," Jackson began, "I'm not exactly sure how old he is, but he's definitely in his early twenties—"
"That's nonsense," Shiloh interrupted. "Age is just a number, Jackson. If you like him, you should go for it."
Jackson shook his head. "You know it's not that easy, Shiloh. Age does make a difference." He gave his well-intentioned friend a small smile. "No, we'll probably never be more than friends, and that's okay. I could always use another one."
Shiloh opened his mouth as if to say something, then he shook his head.
"How about a couple of croissants for breakfast, Jackson?" Allen asked.
Thankful that Allen changed the subject, Jackson winked at him. "That would be great, thanks."
Allen nodded and grabbed a sheet of wax paper. He reached inside the glass case and gently grabbed two big, flaky croissants and put them into a multi-colored paper bag.
"Since summer is about to come to an end, Shiloh and I are having a little getaway in a few weeks at our cabin on Labor Day weekend. We'd like you to come. You can even bring your new friend." Allen handed him the croissant-filled bag.
Although Shiloh and Allen lived in Charlestown, on most weekends the happy couple went to the cabin Allen lived in before he and Shiloh got together three years ago. It was in a prime location across from the Ozark National Forest. A couple of months before, Allen and Shiloh had invited him for a cookout they planned, and since Jackson didn't want to look like a fuddy-dud; he had made himself go.
Even though he and the couple were friends, he still sometimes felt like an outsider. Shiloh and Allen invited several couples, and he had been the only person there without someone special. Although he enjoyed seeing the deer and other wildlife that seemed to be at the couple's back door, he still felt uncomfortable being everyone's third wheel. It was a feeling he didn't care to repeat any time soon.
Maybe he could invite Elijah to come with him as a friend. There was nothing wrong with that, right? It wasn't as if it would be a romantic weekend. He'd just be spending the weekend with friends, so there was no need to think otherwise.
"Yes! Bring your new friend, Jackson. We'll make a weekend of it." Shiloh clapped his hands excitedly.
"I don't know about coming down for the whole weekend," Jackson said. "For one thing, I can't leave Shep alone that long."
"Now, Jackson, we won't take no for an answer," Shiloh interrupted with a dramatic flick of his hand. "You know Shep is invited too. We have plenty of space for him to run and play. Just make sure you both bring your swim suits and some old and comfortable clothes to wear." Shiloh gave him an angelic grin and ushered Jackson out the door before he could get a word in edgewise. "See you later, sweetie." Shiloh gave him a flirty wink and closed the door behind him.
So much for telling the little man no.
Though the weekend getaway stank of a setup, Jackson couldn't stop the smile that formed on his face. Maybe spending time at their cabin with friends would be a good idea after all.
As Jackson headed toward his office, he couldn't help but hope so.
****
Jackson unlocked his front door and was immediately greeted by a wiggly, happy Shep. He set his briefcase and mail on the small entryway table and leaned down to scratch Shep behind his ears. "You're such a good boy, aren't you Shep?" He gave the dog one more good scratch and headed toward the back door with Shep right at his heels. He opened the sliding door and motioned for the bouncy dog to exit. "Go outside, buddy. I'll be there in a minute."
Shep gave Jackson one more tail wag and took off running into the backyard, barking happily and chasing squirrels.
Jackson chuckled at Shep's antics and slid the door closed.
He walked over to the refrigerator and grabbed a bottle of Bud Light. It was time to kick back and relax for a while. Jackson opened his junk drawer and fumbled around for the bottle opener. Just as he started to open the icy beverage, he heard a quick rap on the sliding glass door.
Puzzled, Jackson set the bottle on the counter and cautiously walked to the back door.
Who would be knocking?
He pushed aside the curtain and was immediately met by a pair of smiling golden brown eyes.
Jackson grinned and slid open the door. "Hey, Elijah! Come on in. I was about to kick back and have a beer. Would you like to join me?"
Elijah shook his head and followed him into the kitchen. "I don't drink anymore, Jack. But if you have a Coke or some water, I'd love to join you. I'm sorry for popping in like this," Elijah smiled shyly at him, "I saw you pull up, and I thought you might like some company."
Jackson's heart fluttered happily. He was flattered that Elijah had been looking for him to return home. It was exciting to think the younger man wanted to spend some time with him. He made a mental notation that Elijah didn't drink alcohol and hunted through his refrigerator for a non-alcoholic drink.
"You're welcome to come by anytime, Elijah." Jackson grabbed a cold bottle of soda from the refrigerator. He twisted the top off of it and handed it to his new friend with wink.
"Thanks, Jack. I appreciate it." Elijah's shy smile turned into a happy one. He accepted the Coke from Jackson and took several healthy swigs from it.
He watched Elijah's full, sexy lips surround the top of the bottle as he thirstily drank from it. To Jackson's horror, he could feel his cock start to harden and press against the zipper of his khakis. He forced his gaze away from those kissable lips and took a deep drink of beer.
Jackson needed to cool down his wayward libido before the younger man noticed his aroused state, embarrassing both of them. "Um, Elijah, how about you head on out back with Shep while I get changed into something more comfortable? I'll join y'all in a few minutes, okay?"
"Okay, see you in a few." Elijah gave Jackson a saucy wink and was out the door before he could say another word.
Jackson watched Elijah's cute little round butt disappear outside. His adjusted his hard prick and leaned heavily against the countertop.
He called me Jack.
Hardly anyone called him Jack anymore. Ironically, all through school and college, he had been known to his friends as Jack, not Jackson. But since Ben and his family had favored his given name so much, Jack soon turned into Jackson. Now with Elijah calling him Jack, he began to think that maybe with this budding friendship and possible new turn his life was making, Jack was appropriate after all… es
pecially to his young, new friend.
He pushed away from the counter and walked toward his bedroom, unbuttoning his light green oxford shirt as he went. As he entered his bedroom, he tossed the shirt into the dirty clothes hamper beside his dresser and started sliding off his brown wing-tipped shoes. He picked them up and put them neatly into the bottom of his closet.
Jackson sighed with relief as he unbuttoned and unzipped his pants and slid them off. He draped his pants over the back of a chair and sat heavily on the edge of the bed. Looking down at his half-aroused prick, he sighed. "You might as well get over it, buddy. There'll be no playtime for you."
On top of the oak dresser, a framed picture of Ben peered at Jackson. He picked it up and sighed as his gaze roamed over Ben's tanned body and smiling face. Memories of taking the picture on their vacation to Hawaii, just a few months before Ben's death swirled to the surface of his mind. They had spent the day laughing and swimming in the ocean and generally being captivated with each other. When the sun began to set, Ben asked someone to take their picture so they could remember their joyous day in paradise. Little did Jackson know less than six months later, Ben would senselessly be ripped out of his life forever. He traced the tip of his index finger over Ben's tall, athletic form. "What am I going to do, Benjamin? I don't know why I'm attracted to him. Elijah's nothing like you, and he's way too fucking young for me."
Knowing Ben's picture would not have an answer for him; he sighed and set it back in its place. "Well, you're no help," Jackson griped. He opened the middle dresser drawer, pulled out a pair of old blue jeans and slid them on.
He still missed his lover, but Jackson was beginning to believe he needed something more than just a memory to keep him warm at night.
Angel's Redemption Page 3