by Jill Shalvis
“No one’s up here. We’re all alone, and I’m a big girl. I’m ready for this. The question is, are you?”
Cam stared at her, his heart thudding hard and fast in his chest again, as it had when she’d nearly fallen. “You really are the most remarkable woman I’ve ever met.”
“And I’m something else too.” She shrugged out of her jacket, leaving her only in the long-sleeved silk long underwear shirt that was already hanging off one shoulder. “Want to guess?”
“Katie, it’s butt-ass cold out here.”
“Then keep me warm.” He yanked down the zipper of his jacket and pulled in her shaking body, holding her up against his body to share the heat he had in spades, only to realize she hadn’t shivered in cold, but excitement.
Which, in turn, fueled his. As if it needed fueling. He was already so turned on he couldn’t see straight. He certainly wasn’t thinking straight or he wouldn’t have leaned back against the rock, pulling her onto his lap so that she straddled him, and then kissed them both stupid.
So stupid…
Her hands were running over him, everywhere she could reach. “You’re only wearing a T-shirt.” Which she shoved up beneath his jacket. Then she pressed her mouth right over his heart, which gave one hard lurch.
“I get hot on snowshoes. But not nearly as hot as I am right now—Jesus,” he breathed when she licked his nipple. “Katie, listen. We should—”
“Yeah, we should.” Surging up, she covered his mouth with hers, showing him exactly what they “really should,” and with another low, rough groan, he slid his hands beneath her shirt to touch warm skin. God, she was sweet, so damn sweet—
“We should do whatever we want,” she murmured, her hands already doing whatever they wanted. He tried to catch them, but she was fast and nimble and greatly determined. “You can complain about how much you hate all this later,” she told him, kissing his jaw, his ear, her hands eating him up wherever they touched. “God, this fresh air is invigorating.”
“Actually, that’s you. You’re invigorating.” His hands skimmed over her hips to her ass, squeezing, pulling her in closer so that she rubbed against his zipper, letting out a sexy little moan of pleasure.
“Why, Cameron Wilder,” she purred. “I do believe you’re as excited as I am. Do you offer this service to all your clients?”
His eyes closed in sheer pleasure when she sucked his ear-lobe into her mouth. “Only the hot ones—” He hissed out a breath when she bit his ear, then soothed the ache by sucking it into her mouth, and just like that, he was a goner.
Or more likely, he’d always been a goner for her. He didn’t know how, but in two seconds flat, he’d slipped beneath her silk shirt, unhooked her bra, nudged it aside, and then, oh yeah, filled his palms with her warm, full breasts.
She gasped, and he lifted his head. “Too cold?”
“No. Yes.” She laughed breathlessly, arching her hips against his. “Just don’t stop.”
He didn’t, and she repaid him by slipping her hands down his torso to his lower abs, her fingers playing with his waist-band, which was loose enough that if she wanted to, she could—
God. Yeah. That. She could dip those fingers in. He sort of lost himself, tugging up her shirt, exposing her breasts to the night air and his hungry gaze only long enough for him to cover one with his hand, the other with his mouth, sucking her in to rasp his tongue over her nipple.
A wordless plea for more fell from her lips as she rocked against him, her head falling back. Her ski cap slipped off, and so did his, aided by her fingers.
Above them, around them, no part of the night objected. The only sounds were the soft rustling of the wind, and their own labored breathing. Her face was flushed, and when he switched to her other breast, she hissed out a breath and rocked her hips to his. He cupped her most cuppable ass, showing her what rhythm worked for him, then slipped his hand down the back of her ski pants. But some idiot had given her a size too small and he couldn’t get as far as he wanted, so he came around to the front and unbuttoned and unzipped and, finally, oh yeah…got inside.
Her panties were silk.
And wet.
So damn wet.
No slouch, she followed his lead and had his pants undone as well; but before she could dive in, he stroked her on that wet, creamy center and she went still, panting out his name.
Loving the sound of his name on her lips, he did it again, just a single stroke with a slow, delicate precision.
She still didn’t move, she’d gone still as a statue, and he looked into her face. “Katie? Okay?”
Her fingers dug into his pecs. “Ohmigod, yes.”
Taking that as a good sign, he gently stroked her again with just the pad of his finger, slowly outlining her, which seemed to galvanize her back into motion. Her hips went to town, moving impatiently against him. “Cam—” She sounded a little panicked. “I—Ohmigod.”
She was close, he could tell, so close, so he kept at it, adding another finger, increasing the rhythm, the pressure. She had her hands fisted in his waistband for balance, still rocking her hips as she gulped for air. “Remember, it’s been a really long time.” She had to stop and pant some more. “And I’m fairly primed here, so—”
God, she was so sweet. And hot. So fucking hot. He slid a finger into her and ran his tongue over her nipple, loving the way she trembled over him.
“Seriously,” she gasped. “I’m going to…”
“Yeah.” Knowing it made him even hotter, made him tremble, made him feel a burst of something he wouldn’t have recognized a few weeks back but was beginning to become habit when he was with her—exhilarated. “Come. I want to feel you.”
But instead she did something that changed the game. She slid her hand all the way into his pants as well, and wrapped her fingers around him, stroking in the same rhythm he was using on her.
And suddenly he wasn’t feeling like smiling smugly at what he was doing to her, for her, at how he was holding her on the very edge.
Because suddenly he was the one on that edge. “Katie.” He needed her to slow down or stop, but his hands were full. Full of her. Desperate, his hips rocked helplessly against hers. Gasping out her name, along with some unintelligible plea like “Oh God, don’t stop,” and more that might have been utterly humiliating if he’d been alone in this insanity, but he wasn’t.
Alone.
Not even close. She was right there with him, crying out, shuddering as she burst. And then, while he was absolutely, one-hundred-percent lost in the vision of her as she came stealing the very breath from his lungs as she did—he shuddered too. So far gone in her, he hadn’t realized that her hands had never stopped, that they were still stroking him, pumping, making his entire body tighten—“Katie, wait—”
She didn’t, and though he tried to extract his fingers from her pants, it was way too late, and he was coming in her hands the same way she’d come in his.
Only it wasn’t exactly the same, and he jerked back, the horrified apology on his lips. She simply moved with him, planting a kiss on his mouth as he shuddered and barely managed to come back to planet Earth. Opening his eyes, he found hers open on his, her mouth nibbling at the corner of his lips. “Katie, I—”
“Don’t.” She grinned but didn’t pull back. “Please don’t say anything to ruin this for me.”
Don’t say anything to ruin this for her? How about doing something to ruin it, like come in her hands as if he was fifteen and jacking off in the woods. “Katie—”
She was handing him a napkin from her pocket, one of the napkins from the bar at the lodge, and straightening her clothes while letting out a running commentary that made his head spin.
“I’ve never made out with someone beneath the stars like that.” She stopped to flash him another grin. “I’ve always wanted to.” She tucked her shirt into her ski pants. “I’ve shaved my legs all week, hoping.” She shot him another smile and stuck her hand back into her pocket, coming up with anoth
er napkin. “Do you need—”
“No.” Jesus. “Katie, I’m sorry. It’s been like a year, and…” And he ran out of steam. “And nothing. I should have been able to hold back—”
She shut him up with her mouth. “It was perfect,” she said against his lips, kissing him again before pulling back to zip up her jacket.
“We didn’t finish.”
She shot him a saucy look. “I hate to disagree with you, but you most definitely did finish. And so did I.” She sighed, a purely feminine sound of pleasure that made him half hard again. “First time in a very long time for me, too, by the way. I feel like I’m glowing. Am I glowing?”
He stared at her and found himself shaking his head. “Seriously, I—”
“Seriously,” she mocked, and nudged him in the chest. “I’m not stupid, Cam. Or inexperienced. I know you think it’s ridiculous I’m grinning like an idiot and waxing poetic over a simple hot and heavy make-out session. But you have to understand, in my life, I’ve never really given myself a lot of chances for fun and excitement.”
He felt his heart give. “I know.”
“For me, it was that wish on that falling star coming true. Can’t you accept that?”
He stared into her eyes, realizing that he was still expecting her to turn into someone else at every turn, waiting for her to turn needy, or clinging, or demanding, or something other than what she appeared to be.
“Cam?” she asked, just Katie. Unique Katie.
Still looking into her eyes, he knew he could do no less than agree. “Yes.”
With another of her wide, sweet, contagious grins, she gave him one last smacking kiss. “Great. Now let’s go. I’m starving.”
Chapter 16
On the hike back down, Katie absorbed the gorgeous night, and the equally gorgeous man leading her. They were quiet. Content. And also on cloud nine.
At least she was.
Orgasms tended to do that for her.
It’d been a really long time, even longer since she’d had one so quickly, so easily, without straining for it. And she’d done the same for him. God, the pleasure of that, she could hardly stand it.
Cam glanced at her as they arrived at her cabin. He caught her smile and sighed. “Still?”
With a laugh, she pulled out her key. “I can’t help it. I love it here.”
He slipped his hands into his pockets and didn’t say anything to that.
So they were going to do this again, the thing where he pulled back and she let him. “Are you worried I’m going to want to stay, Cam? That I don’t know the difference between sex and love? Because I am leaving, much as I love it here.”
“You’d get tired of it eventually anyway.”
“Why? You don’t.”
“No, but I was raised out here.”
“So what does that mean, you’re heartier than I am?”
“Well…”
“Come on, Cam,” she said gently. “What you’re made of comes from inside. A person can look like a wuss”—she gestured to herself—“and still be made of stern stuff.” She playfully flexed her biceps. “On the inside.”
He cocked his head and studied her. “I’ll agree, one’s strength has nothing to do with what someone looks like on the outside.”
She reached for his hand. “And let’s just say it. If you’re made of sterner stuff than I am, it’s because of your childhood. Not where it took place, but because of what you went through.”
“Yeah, maybe.” He leaned back against the porch post, looking out into the night, his eyes reflecting his faraway thoughts. “Listen, I don’t know what you think you know, but I don’t want you to think—It wasn’t so bad.”
“Your mom left when you were born and your dad gave you up when you were eight, that sounds pretty bad.”
“Yeah, but him giving me up to Annie was a good thing, not a bad thing.”
Her entire heart softened at all he didn’t say, at how impossibly horrifying it must have been to have neither parent want him and know it, not to mention the abuse she suspected he’d suffered. Not wanting him to hold back, not when he’d spent too much of his life doing just that, she said, “He hurt you.”
He shrugged those carry-the-weight-of-the-world shoulders. “He had a short fuse when it came to me. I wasn’t his.”
“Do you know who your real father is?”
“My mother never said, and she never came back.”
Katie’s own parents, so reserved, so distant, had never been all that emotionally available, but this…this was nearly beyond her comprehension. “I’m so glad you had Annie. She loves you so much.”
“Yes, she had to. I was…difficult.”
“A knack for trouble, huh. Gee, what a surprise.”
“Oh, yeah. And for pissing people off. As I’ve been trying to tell you, it’s a particular talent of mine. With women in general.”
“Is that right? You don’t piss me off too. You frustrate me sometimes…” The acceptance of that was on his face, and she nudged him. “You also make me laugh. You make me think, you make me…” She waggled a brow.
He laughed but it didn’t get all the way to his eyes, making her realize just how little experience he had with people sticking with him. “I’m new at this whole taking risks thing, Cam, but you’re not. I’d think you’d be wanting to take a risk on us. After all, it’s a short-term one.”
“It’s not that.” He met her gaze. “Just don’t fall for me, Katie. I’m not ready for that.”
She raised a brow. “I don’t believe I said anything about falling. I wished for good sex, and got it. The end. Now I’m thirsty. I’m going in for a drink. Would you like to come with me and piss me off some more?”
He winced. “Okay, first of all, that wasn’t sex, and I’m normally much better at it. And, no, I can’t come in, I have to go check on the others.”
“You are good at it, and tell Sweetie Pie thanks for giving us some time up there alone. Good night.” She leaned in and gave him a kiss, which given the low, rough groan that escaped him, he’d dream about later.
Inside, she took a long, hot shower, put on a big old T-shirt, left out some cheese for Chuck—or so she hoped—and then was surprised to hear something outside. “Chuck,” she said with excitement, and opened the door.
“Not Chuck.”
Nope. Not even close. But she remained excited as her heart executed a slow summersault at the sight of Cam standing there on her doorstep. He had his hands shoved in his pockets, looking unsettled, frustrated, and sexy as hell. He’d changed out of his weather gear and into baggy cargoes and a sweatshirt, hood up, smelling like soap, shampoo, and sexy guy. “Change your mind about that drink?”
“Yeah. No. Christ.” He shoved off his hood, tunneling his fingers into his hair. “Yes.”
“I don’t mean to be bossy or demanding,” she teased gently, “but that glower is really putting a damper on my lingering sexual high from the mountain. So if you could at least try to look like you had a nice time until you’re out of my sight again, that would help my ego. A lot.”
He looked at her a moment, then behind him as if to make sure they were alone. Clearly not trusting even that, he nudged her inside, followed her, then shut the door.
And looked at her some more, which worked for her. “Hot chocolate?” she asked.
“What are you wearing beneath that T-shirt?”
“Not much,” she admitted, wishing he wore the same. Though his sweatshirt looked damn good on that torso. He had his hands on his lean hips, his legs looking longer than the legal limit in those cargo pants. His boots were as scarred as his poor heart, the one she wanted to hold in her hands and keep warm and safe.
Which was a little like wishing she could pet a wild mountain cat, really, because no one touched Cam’s heart.
He was doing his damnedest to see to that.
His eyes were stark green and filled to the brim with intelligence and heat, though minus his usual wry amusement. His mouth w
as a little grim and firm, and she had the sudden urge to kiss all that grimness away. “Okay, while you’re very pretty all sexy and brooding,” she said, “I’m going to have to insist that you loosen up—”
Which was all she got out before he backed her to the door. “I can’t loosen up. I can’t do anything with you thinking that what happened up there tonight was the best I’ve got to give you. It wasn’t, by the way.”
It was hard to concentrate with his rock-hard thighs pressing