Born in the Shadows (In the Shadows Series Book 1)

by Courtney McPhail

  Not that Gabe judged the guy. He knew the feeling of looking for a kill switch to grief at the bottom of a liquor bottle. At least Marcus had someone looking out for him; it was more than Gabe ever had during his benders.

  He had been envious tonight as he sat with the family as they told stories about Olivia’s life. He could have used a support system like that during the loss of his mother. Maybe he wouldn’t have fallen apart if he had more family to cling to at the time.

  But there was no use playing what if with the past. It couldn’t be changed and besides, if things had been different, he might not have met Cordelia or found his way to this place.

  He left the men to their game and headed upstairs, figuring that Cordelia had gone to their room. Their room. Not hers, but theirs. Well, looked like he was getting pretty used to the idea of being here with Cordelia.

  He should be worried about that kind of thinking. He had no idea how long whatever this was between him and Cordelia would last. The events of the last few days had thrown them together but he had no idea if, once the threat of attack was gone, she would ask him to stay or send him back to his regular life.

  The idea of going back, of not being here with her, had his heart racing. He didn’t think he could go back. Now that he had touched her, tasted her skin and felt what it was like to be inside her, it would be damn near impossible to go back.

  As he walked down the corridor to their room, he considered how far gone he was when it came to Cordelia. He was pretty sure that what he was feeling was love even though they hadn’t been together for long. Hell, if he was honest with himself, he’d been in love with her even back when she was still human.

  He wasn’t sure it was the best time to reveal that truth to Cordelia. He had no idea what she was feeling for him, aside from the fact that he could play her body like a fine tuned instrument. He knew she liked being in bed with him but he wasn’t sure if her feelings went beyond lust and friendship.

  Well, he sure as hell wasn’t going to get a better idea of her feelings by standing out in the hallway.

  He went into their room and smiled when Cordelia walked out of the closet, smoothing her hair back into a ponytail.

  She had changed into a pair of baggy sweatpants and his t-shirt that had come up fresh from the laundry. She smiled in greeting as she rubbed lotion that made her smell like vanilla over her hands and arms.

  “How was it?” she asked as he sat down on the edge of the bed and began to pull his boots off.

  “No big deal. Just a couple questions and he let me go.”

  He dropped the boots and looked up to find her standing right in front of him. Seeing her there looking fresh and clean, smelling sweet and wearing his shirt had arousal curling in his belly.

  He wanted her now and his body hardened in response, eager to get her naked and under him.

  Unfortunately Cordelia seemed completely unaware of his craving for her, frowning as she reached out and threaded her fingers through his hair.

  “Your hair is getting long,” she said as she watched the locks fall back to brush his shoulders.

  “You don’t like it?” he asked, his voice hoarse with tethered desire.

  “No, I like it like this,” she assured him, letting her fingers run through his hair again. “It’s so soft.”

  He reached out for her, pulling her into the space between his spread legs and laid his head on her breast as she continued to play with his hair. He listened to her heartbeat as her fingers teased his hair, the steady tempo lulling him into a pleasant haze. He enjoyed the moment of peace as they held each other, drawing comfort from the contact.

  When her fingernails gently scratched his scalp, the stimulation had his hips jumping involuntarily in response. Her hands drifted down from his scalp and the rasp of his zipper as she lowered it was loud in the quiet room. She slipped a hand inside and wrapped it around his shaft, caressing the length before pulling him from the confines of his pants. He groaned as the cool air of the room hit his hot flesh and Cordelia’s hand tightened around him.

  He closed his eyes as she stroked her hand up his shaft, her palm caressing the swollen head before sliding back down the length. Her hand halted its movements and when he opened his eyes, he saw that she had lowered herself to her knees before him. She kept her eyes locked with his as her tongue darted out and licked the tip.

  “Oh fuck.”

  A bolt of pleasure shot through his groin at the sensation but he did his best to keep himself still. He clenched fistfuls of the sheets in his hands as her tongue continued to tease him, his knuckles turning white. He was afraid to touch her, worried that his self control would crack and he would take her too roughly.

  She trailed her tongue down the underside of his shaft, tracing the throbbing vein down to his sac. She cupped the twin globes in her palm as her tongue moved back up to trace the ridge around the swollen head.

  Her lips wrapped around him and for the first time, she took him inside her mouth. Her tongue swirled over the head while her hand grasped the base to steady him. Her lips slid further down as she took him deeper in her mouth and he actually whimpered.

  It was too much and he knew he was moments away from losing all control. He reached out to grasp her shoulders and gently nudged her away from him. She let him go reluctantly, frowning up at him, questions clear in her eyes.

  “Sorry baby, I just need a minute,” he told her. He was so close to just tossing her on the bed and taking her hard and fast. As much as he wanted it, he was afraid that if he was anything but loving and gentle, he would frighten her.

  The disappointment in her eyes was quickly replaced with mischief as she smiled up at him, her fangs extended to their full length. Before he could warn her further, she dipped her head and traced her lips up his inner thigh to where it met his hip. It was the briefest of caresses, almost like a whisper along his skin and then her fangs were plunging into his hot flesh.

  His back arched as he threw his head back to groan loudly as her mouth latched on to his thigh and she fed from him. His hips thrust in time with her suckling mouth and he could feel his release building inside of him. He squeezed his eyes tight, fighting against the waves of pleasure, not ready to go yet, not until Cordelia was coming along with him.

  He used the tried and true measure of reciting baseball stats in his head while she drank her fill and managed to keep himself still. When she was done, she sat back, gazing up at him, her eyes deep pools of black and her face flushed with arousal.

  “Fuck me,” she said and that was all the encouragement he needed.

  He shot up off the bed, grabbing her by the shoulders and pushing her towards the bed while he moved behind her. He yanked her sweatpants down to her ankles, humming in appreciation when he saw that she didn’t have on any panties.

  He took his cock in a hand, placing it against her slick entrance and plunged himself deep inside her. He didn’t give her a chance to get used to him, his hips pumping a fierce staccato as he took her from behind.

  He had always wanted to be gentle with Cordelia but all his holding back had been futile. The need to possess her had built up inside him until it exploded in this animal need to take her hard and fast. He needed to mark his territory.

  He reached under her shirt to cup her breasts in the palms of his hands as he thrust himself inside her. He let his head drop to her shoulder and as he pounded into her, he couldn’t stop from sinking his blunt teeth into her flesh.

  She cried out at the feeling, her hips thrusting back to meet him as he plunged inside her and he felt her walls begin to spasm around him as she came. Her slick channel milking him was too much and he felt the orgasm that had been building finally give way, his hips driving into her in a final thrust as he filled her.

  With a final shudder, he collapsed on top of her, pressing her into the mattress as he tried to get his bearings. He realized that he was probably crushing her and he rolled off to the side. He watched as Cordelia stretched hersel
f out on the bed, his gaze drifting to her bare ass, where it wiggled high in the air as she moved.

  Desire stirred inside him again and he couldn’t hide a satisfied smirk. She made him feel like a teenager again; always raring to go no matter how many times he had her.

  She groaned painfully as she lifted her arms over her head and his need was quickly forgotten.

  “I didn’t hurt you did I?” he asked, worried at the sounds she made.

  “Not in a bad way,” she said with a sexy grin. “Any time you want to do it like that again, I’m game.”

  He laughed and grabbed her, rolling them so that he was on his back and she was straddling him. He rose up on his elbows and kissed her, caressing her with his tongue as he cupped her ass.

  “You are amazing.”

  She giggled and kissed him on the tip of his nose. “You’re pretty amazing yourself.”

  As she looked down at him, he felt his heart clench and he knew then he was definitely in trouble. There was something incredibly right about this moment, the two of them together; sated, laughing and happy.

  And when he felt like things were right in his life, that was when he was in the most danger. It was like the universe was determined to make sure things didn’t go smooth in his life. Any time life was going well, the universe tossed a wrench into things and sat back to watch it explode.

  But now wasn’t the time to worry about what would come in the future. It was time to live in the present. He had a beautiful girl in his arms and she wanted him as much as he wanted her.

  He pulled his t-shirt over Cordelia’s head, sad to see her out of it but happy to have her naked. Yeah, he was definitely going to stop thinking about the future and focus on the now.

  ***

  Remy woke from what passed as sleep for him now: a state of unconsciousness that left him still exhausted no matter how long it lasted.

  His good eye stung as he peeled it open, the bright light blinding him momentarily. The overhead bulb was always on, keeping the large room constantly bathed in unnatural light. It was to prevent any shadow walking but his captor didn’t need to bother. Remy was in no shape to escape this prison.

  With no windows in the room, it was impossible to judge the passage of time but he felt like it had been years since he had been in Paris. Walking back to his flat from a nearby café where he had grabbed a light meal before the sun had risen, he had no idea he was being followed. He had just reached the door to his building when his otherworldly senses had triggered. Before he could react, there had been a stabbing pain in his neck and then everything went from clear to blurry to black.

  When he had awakened, he was in this horrible room, naked and suspended from the ceiling by hooks and chains. The contraption kept him suspended off the ground and in enough pain that even taking a small breath made him want to vomit. There was no escape for him.

  And there was no way for him to call for help. He had tried his damnedest to reach out to his clan when he had first woken up but he couldn’t feel any of them. It was as if his brain had been cut off from the rest of the world. It had not been until one of his tormentors held up a mirror for him to see his face that he had understood why.

  Somehow, they had found a neural inhibitor and had secured it to his head. Seeing the bloody metal and his own dead eyes, it had been the only time he had cried out; the only time he gave them the satisfaction.

  The room was empty now but he remembered when it had been filled. He could still hear the jeering cries and vicious snarls of the Shadow Walkers as they became rabid beasts when the one they called Armand commenced the torture. He broke bones, pulled off fingernails, stabbed and burned him, laughing all the while as his followers cheered him on.

  The physical torture had been the least of it though. When Armand was done with him, he had turned him over to his zealous acolytes that were frothing at the bit to get their hands on an older generation Shadow Walker. They weren’t just about pain; they were also hell bent on humiliation.

  He could still remember the relief that had filled him when he had been lowered to the ground. He had thought that this was it; they were finally going to end him. In that moment, he had been ready to welcome death with open arms.

  Except that hadn’t been the intent. Death would be too quick, too merciful, for them to give him. What they wanted was degradation and when they held him down and one of the males dropped his pants, they got it.

  He squeezed his eyes shut as he fought the memories back. He would not relive that violation again. The only way he could endure would be to keep the truth of what had happened buried.

  And he had to endure. He was no longer ready to die. He needed to make all of them pay for what they had done. He would do whatever it took to survive this, clinging to his vow of vengeance like a life raft in a storm. He would make all of them bleed for what they did to him.

  Remy was pulled from his fantasies of revenge when the only door in the room opened. Armand walked in, dragging behind him a human woman who was sobbing hysterically. He could smell the fear pouring out of her and his stomach turned at the scent. His sense of justice screamed for him to help her, to get her away from that monster but there was nothing he could do but watch and dread what Armand had planned for the girl.

  He tossed her to the floor and she quickly scuttled into the corner, pulling her legs up to her chest as protection. Armand just stood in front of Remy, ignoring her as if she were nothing but furniture. Instead he stared intently, circling Remy, as if sizing him up.

  “What is it that you think of while you hang here?” Armand asked him. “Do you fantasise about getting out of these chains and killing me? Or do you dream of your sire coming to rescue you?”

  He laughed at that and Remy longed to spit in his face but his mouth was as dry as cotton. All he could do was refuse to look at the psychopath, as if not acknowledging him would take away his power.

  “He will never come to save you, Remy. You’re here at my leisure and you’ll only leave here when I decide it’s time to dispose of you.”

  He continued to stay silent, refusing to rise to the bait. It hurt too much to speak anyway.

  Armand stalked over to the corner and grabbed the woman by her hair, yanking her to her feet. She screamed in protest, her limbs flailing around helplessly as he dragged her over to stand in front of Remy.

  Armand hoisted the girl up so that Remy could see her terrified and tear stained face. She looked young, probably around eighteen and he wanted to tell her that it was all going to be okay. But he wouldn’t because he would be lying and the girl didn’t deserve to be told lies from him.

  “It’s time for you to drink,” Armand told him, pushing the girl’s head to the side and exposing the column of her neck.

  The girl trembled in his arms, her eyes wide with terror, her screams and sobs gone now as shock took over. She was a small, defenceless animal caught in the grasp of a deadly predator. Despite everything that had been done to him and taken away from him, he still hurt for this girl.

  “Fuck you.”

  His voice was thready from the pain and energy it took to speak. As much as it hurt, this he would protest. He would not let this woman be forced into feeding him, violating her in the process.

  “You are going to feed.”

  “I said…Fuck you!”

  “Fine, be that way.”

  Armand grabbed one of the woman’s hands and pulled her fingers back towards the top of her hand. Remy only heard the first snap of breaking bones before her blood curdling screams filled the room, drowning out the remaining cracks.

  Remy jerked against his chains, instinct taking over at the sound of a female in pain. His body was rocked with his own agony as the hooks shifted inside his skin and black spots exploded before his eyes. His voice joined the girl’s as he howled in anguish.

  When the pain finally subsided and he could see semi-clearly again, he saw that Armand still held the quietly sobbing girl before him, her injured hand
cradled against her chest.

  “I will keep hurting her until you feed,” Armand said evenly. His face was impassive and Remy knew that he took no real pleasure from hurting the girl. He was only doing it because he needed Remy to feed. Without blood, a Shadow Walker could not heal and would eventually succumb to their injuries just like humans. Remy would be useless to him then.

  Armand pushed the girl in his face, forcing him to look at her bare neck. Remy could see her pulse racing, her jugular vein pumping in a violent rhythm. He could feel the hunger awakened inside him as he stared at her vein. Unbidden, his fangs elongated as the sound of her pounding heart filled his ears.

  “How can you resist this? You have to smell how sweet she is, you know she is going to taste even sweeter,” Armand taunted. “Here, let me give you a sample.”

  With a flick of the wrist, Armand produced a switchblade and made a shallow cut across her throat. The girl did nothing to stop Armand, laying there limp in his arms, shock putting her into a catatonic state. Remy watched her blood well up in a thin line along her pale skin.

  Armand was right, she did smell sweet. Delicious, in fact.

  Remy could feel the bloodlust rear its ugly head, saliva wetting his dry mouth as the scent of her filled his nose. Sweet and flowery like a spring meadow.

  He wasn’t strong enough to fight it off. His body was demanding the blood so it could heal. He needed this.

  Before he knew what was happening, his fangs were in her neck and her blood was on his tongue. He pulled deeply, once, twice, the taste of her blood a fine nectar, before he remembered where he was and that she was an unwilling partner.

  He pulled away in horror, his stomach turning at the thought of what he had done, the violation he had caused her. A wave of nausea hit him but his body fought the urge to vomit up what he consumed, too hungry and greedy to give up even a drop of the blood.