Three Alarm Fury
Page 15
“Then you’ll come to Advanced Inner Peace?” Sassy asked. “I’ll make sure Clara shows up too, even if I have to strap her to my back. I mean, she’s being cruel, but she’s still my friend, you know? I haven’t had many good girlfriends—or any…” She trailed off.
I got her as far as the door, when guilty feet ground me to a halt. “When’s the class?”
“I think it’s Friday afternoon, but I’ll text you for sure.”
“I would appreciate that.” I paused. “You’re not going to lose Clara, okay? Her issue…”
“Fourth chakra.”
“Her fourth chakra is going to be aligned again before you know it.”
She beamed. “Yes, that’s what Advanced Inner Peace is for.” She slipped out the door and I locked it behind her.
“You’re not actually going to attempt advanced yoga, are you?” Neville asked.
I hurried back to the computer. “Weren’t you listening?”
“Not closely,” he admitted. “I tend to get distracted by the rest of her.”
I groaned. “Typical man.” I ran a quick internet search on chakras and compared the information with the list we’d created. “I think Sassy is onto something.”
“Sorry, what?” Neville blinked in confusion.
“Come and see,” I said. “Father Kevin lost his faith. That’s the crown chakra. His connection to the divine spirit. Soul energy. My mother is having sex-related issues. That’s her sacral chakra, the second one.”
Neville peered over my shoulder. “John Maclaren and Charity Grace have blocked creativity and depression. Those are also the sacral chakra.”
“Aunt Thora can’t stop talking,” I said, which included revealing secrets. Thank the gods she didn’t know mine. “That’s her throat chakra.”
“What about Rosalie?” Neville asked.
“Her third eye chakra,” I said. I thought of Verity’s uptick in seemingly unrelated ailments. Migraines, digestive issues, arthritis, nerve pain—they were all attributable to imbalanced chakras. It only took a few minutes to connect each affected party on the list to a corresponding chakra.
“Okay, so what does it mean when everybody’s chakras have been knocked out of alignment around the same time?” I asked.
“Perhaps someone has cast a spell,” Neville suggested. “It would take an awful lot of magic to influence so many in town though. Who’s that powerful, aside from your family?”
“A spell? But why would someone want our chakras imbalanced? A yoga studio owner desperate for business? Seems far-fetched.”
“We’re talking about the supernatural realm, Agent Fury. Everything is far-fetched.”
True enough. I typed ‘chakras’ in the search bar of the FBM database. Fifteen hundred results? Yikes.
“You’ll need to narrow that down,” Neville said.
“You think?”
He leaned beside me. “May I?”
I shifted over so he could use the keyboard. He added ‘imbalance’ and ‘confluence.’
“Ooh, confluence,” I said. “There’s a fancy word.”
“And useful as well.” He tapped the screen. The results had been narrowed to thirty. “I’ll take the first fifteen, shall I?”
“Sounds good to me.” If Clara’s heart chakra truly was out of alignment, then she was at risk for a heart attack like Hank. His heart chakra was also the one imbalanced, but in the opposite direction. I had to help her before it was too late.
Neville hit print and took his page to his own desk to continue the research.
“I never wanted to work behind a desk, yet here I am,” I said. Clicking and reading and printing. “I might as well have been a lawyer or something equally boring.”
“Equally boring?” Neville echoed. “Agent Fury, you catch demons for a living. You harness magic powers for a living. How can that possibly compare with the law?”
“I miss the FBI, Neville. I’m sorry, but I do.” That job had been my dream and I’d achieved it, only to have it taken away because of my stupid fury powers.
“I’m not offended,” Neville said. “I know it isn’t personal.”
I turned to look at him. “Good, because it really isn’t. I liked working in the field. I liked working with Fergus.” Although he probably didn’t like working with me after I bit him, not that he remembered. “I liked being far away from my family.”
“If you’d stayed in San Francisco, you would never have met Chief Fox.”
“Good point.” And one that I couldn’t dismiss. I’d never met anyone like Sawyer Fox. The idea of not meeting him—it wasn’t one I wanted to ponder.
I scanned number nineteen on the list of results. “What about a sorceress that specializes in sexuality?”
“Like a magic prostitute?”
I swiveled my chair to face him. “Are we even researching the same subject? No, not a magic hooker. A sorceress who messes with people’s sexuality for the fun of it.”
Neville considered the idea. “I would say it had potential, except it isn’t simply sexuality that’s been affected.”
“No, that’s true,” I said. “It’s too narrow.” I turned back to the computer and continued to read. “We’re definitely looking for something broader in scope than a magic hooker.”
“Seriously, though, aren’t all hookers magical?” Neville cleared his throat. “That was a joke.”
“I figured.” I moved on to the next one on the list and my heart skipped a beat.
“Here’s one involving a grief demon,” Neville said. “Depression could explain a lot of what’s happened.”
“This is it,” I said. I barely registered his suggestion. “There’s an actual chakra demon.” And it was literally called a chakra demon. So much for prioritizing search results.
“I suppose it isn’t like the Santa Claus of chakras,” Neville said. “Doesn’t sneak down your chimney and deliver you pools of energy.”
“Not quite.” I read slowly, trying to absorb the details.
Neville came back to read over my shoulder. “Oh, dearie me. It certainly does sound like the culprit, doesn’t it?”
“The chakra demon’s main goal is to knock chakras out of alignment, leaving chaos in its wake,” I read aloud. “It will tap into a person’s previously balanced chakra and send it spinning on its axis.”
“It seems we have a chakra demon on the loose in Chipping Cheddar,” Neville said. “I’ll check the reports to see if anyone has reported one missing from Otherworld.”
I kept reading while he checked the reams of paper that had come through this week.
“I think I found a possibility,” he said. “A chakra demon was reported wreaking havoc in Mexico. Agents there lost track of it and there’s been no activity since then.”
“Probably hiding on a beach in a bottle of tequila. That’s what I’d do.” I stopped. “Wait, did you say Mexico?”
Neville reread the report. “Altamira, a port city.”
I smacked my forehead. “You’ve got to be kidding me. The demon hitched a ride here on a party bus.”
“And it’s been enjoying quite the party since its arrival,” Neville said.
“That explains why it started with people on the water,” I said. “The party bus arrived by boat on Friday. The demon infected people like Father Kevin and Jarvis first and then more people became unbalanced as the party bus made its way around town.”
“Does it have to touch the person?” Neville asked. He scanned the information. “Ah, I see. It’s in the haze category.”
“Like the chaos demon?” It took the form of fog that had spread across the town.
“Not quite but a similar effect,” Neville said.
“Is it solid enough that we can apprehend it?”
“There’s always a way to apprehend it,” Neville said.
I leaned my elbows on the desk. “How will we find it? There’ve been no reports of unusual sightings in the supernatural community.” And humans wouldn’t be ab
le to see it anyway.
Neville tapped a paragraph on the screen. “What are demons always drawn to?”
“Power,” I said. “You think we should check the portal and the vortex?”
“It’s a good start.”
“We shouldn’t pursue the demon until we have a plan ready to exact at a moment’s notice,” Neville said.
“I totally agree.”
We stared at each other for a moment. Neither one of us knew where to start.
“There’s nothing in the records about stopping them?” I asked.
“Not that I saw,” Neville said. “They happen to be rare demons.”
Naturally. Why should wrangling a chakra demon be easy?
“Shouldn’t there be a Dummies’ Guide to Demons or something?” I asked. I’d even take the CliffsNotes version at this point.
“I could ask in the wizard forum…” Neville began.
“No, we shouldn’t need to ask for outside help,” I said. “There has to be more information available. If we search hard enough, we’ll find it.”
“Excellent point, Agent Fury,” Neville said. “I excelled in research. I have no doubt I can uncover the information we need.”
He managed it in less than an hour thanks to a call to the FBM’s Mexican headquarters.
“I didn’t know you spoke Spanish, Neville,” I said.
“I don’t,” he said. “I used a translator spell.”
I gaped at him. “There’s still so much I don’t know.”
The wizard smiled proudly. “I’m glad you said that and not me.”
“How do we stop it?” I asked.
“We need seven crystals, one for each chakra,” Neville said.
“Any seven crystals?”
The wizard snorted. “When have you known things to be that easy, Agent Fury?”
I resisted the urge to sulk. “Let me guess. Seven incredibly rare crystals.”
“Yes. Each one corresponds to a chakra. I have four of them here as part of the FBM’s collection,” he said.
“Four chakra crystals?” That seemed odd.
“No, the crystals aren’t only designed for catching a chakra demon. They’re used for all sorts of magic. The rarer ones obviously fuel the most powerful spells so we try to keep a small supply.”
“Which crystals do we have?”
“The ones for the throat, sacral, heart, and navel. We still need three though.”
“Which three?” I went to read his handwritten notes. “Red beryl for the root chakra, benitoite for the third eye, and taaffeite for the crown.”
“I could put in a request from headquarters, but that will take time,” Neville said.
“We don’t have the luxury,” I said. I went back to my desk to retrieve my purse.
“Where are you going?”
“We need rare crystals,” I said. “I happen to know a guy who knows a guy.”
Neville arched an eyebrow. “Care to elaborate?”
I heaved a sigh. “Uncle Moyer. He’s got black market contacts. I bet he can source what we need faster than the FBM.”
“You’re proposing to use illegal means on behalf of a federal agency?” he asked, incredulous.
“Neville, would you exceed the speed limit for the sake of an emergency mission?”
The wizard tapped his cheek thoughtfully. “I suppose it would depend…”
“No, Neville. It wouldn’t depend. If it meant the difference between doing the job and not doing the job, you’d speed.”
He hesitated. “Am I driving past a school? Is school in session?”
I groaned. “Just admit that you’d speed so I can make my point and get out of here.”
Neville held up his chubby hands. “Yes. I would undoubtedly speed.”
I bowed with a flourish. “Thank you.”
Chapter Seventeen
I didn’t bother to call before showing up at Uncle Moyer’s office, so I shouldn’t have been surprised that he was busy with a client. I waited in the reception area, chatting with Connie, his assistant. Connie was like Clara, a human with the Sight. She was perfect for Uncle Moyer’s business because her presence put the human clients at ease. Nobody came to Moyer the Lawyer unless they were desperate. The cost was generally too high and didn’t always involve money.
I liked Connie. She and I often traded stories about our nieces and nephews. Hers were older than Olivia and Ryan, but not so old that she’d forgotten what they were like at the same ages.
“Gavin is all about Fortnite right now,” Connie said. “You’d better hope something else comes along by the time they reach nine or ten. These games suck away their souls.”
“I would think you’d approve of that,” I said, with a nod toward the closed office door. Uncle Moyer was well known for trading favors for souls. The right soul fetched an excellent price in the underworld.
Connie smirked and continued to file her nails at the desk. My mother would’ve hexed her for that.
“I’m here for a paycheck, not to pass judgment,” Connie said. “Besides, Moyer is a good boss.”
“Then it’s a mutual admiration society. Uncle Moyer says you’re the best secretary he’s ever had.”
“Why do you call him your uncle anyways?” Connie asked. “I’ve always wanted to ask.”
“Anton started it when we were kids,” I said. “Because he was Aunt Thora’s son, we thought everybody in her immediate family was an aunt or an uncle. The title stuck.”
Connie’s nose wrinkled. “Cute.”
The office door opened and a man in a cheap polyester suit emerged, wiping the sweat from his brow. It had either been a tough negotiation or this guy had dodged a bullet.
“Do you need to make another appointment, Mr. Hedley?” Connie asked sweetly.
“No thank you,” he said. He ducked his head and left the office, avoiding eye contact with me.
“Moyer, your cousin Eden is here,” Connie called over her shoulder. She moved on to the nails on the other hand.
“What an unexpected surprise,” he said. “Come in, gorgeous.”
I entered his office and closed the door behind me in case his next client was early. I sat across from him and immediately began to play with the Darth Vader bobble head on the edge of the desk.
“Mr. Hedley looked a little unsure about whatever arrangement he made with you.”
Uncle Moyer wore a vague smile. “He wants a trophy wife and he seems willing to part with quite a bit to make that happen.”
“Based on that cheap suit, I’m guessing it’s not a hefty bank account he’ll be parting with.”
“That’s confidential, Eden. You know that.”
“Does he at least get to choose the trophy wife?”
“That will be a separate negotiation with her,” Uncle Moyer said. “As it happens, I already have someone in mind.”
“Lawyer turned matchmaker, huh?”
“I serve my clients as best I can.” He smacked my hand away from the Darth Vader. “Now what brings you here?”
“Official business,” I said. “I need someone with access to a private stock of rare crystals.”
Uncle Moyer slotted his fingers together and leaned forward with enthusiasm. “Go on.”
“I have to stop a chakra demon and I need three rare crystals to do it.”
Uncle Moyer sucked the air into his cheeks. “A chakra demon? I’ve never even heard of that one.”
“It’s apparently as rare as the crystals I need to capture it. Neville and I already have the other four.” I named the three crystals I still needed.
“And what is the FBM prepared to offer in return?”
“To not arrest you for known violations of supernatural law,” I said, directly meeting his gaze.
His jaw clenched. “Are you threatening me, dear cousin?”
“Not at all. I’m telling you the price, just as you asked.”
His pursed lips melted into a smile. “Very shrewd. I’m so proud of you, I
could burst.”
“Please don’t tell anyone,” I said, shifting uncomfortably. “I don’t like playing hardball with family.”
“And yet you excel.” He lifted his phone. “I have a few favors I can call in. How quickly do you need them?”
“Now,” I said. “I have to catch this demon before anyone else gets hurt.”
His dark eyes glimmered with understanding. “I think I know who I can call for one-stop shopping. He owes me big for keeping his family out of the underworld. I’ve been sitting on that particular IOU, but I believe now is an excellent time to call in repayment.”
“Thanks.”
He spun around in his chair and spoke in low tones to his contact. After a few exchanges, he hung up and turned to face me. “All sorted.”
“Really?”
Uncle Moyer nodded. “They should be here momentarily.”
The air over his desk began to shimmer and, one by one, three crystals dropped onto the desk— red, then blue, then a pinky purple.
“That’s what I call direct mail,” I said.
“He’s a warlock,” Uncle Moyer said.
“With deep pockets presumably.”
“And even deeper mines.” He motioned to the crystals. “They’re all yours, dear cousin.”
I scooped them into my hand. “I have a question—did you know my mother used magic to make Tanner cheat on me back in high school?”
He didn’t need to answer. I could tell from the subtle lift of his brow that the news came as a surprise. “How did you find out?”
“Your mother, actually. Her throat chakra is out of alignment so she’s spilling all the family secrets. If there’s anything you want her to keep in the vault, you’d better hope I get to the demon before she can post it online.” I stood to leave.
Uncle Moyer looked at me with concern. “Tell me, is this demon something Tomas and I should be worried about? Are we at risk too?”
I shook the crystals in my hand like I was about to roll a pair of lucky dice. “Not anymore.”
With the crystals safely stowed in Neville’s tiny bottomless bag, he and I wasted no time checking the powerful places in town like the portal and the vortex. Unfortunately, there was no sign of the chakra demon.