The Middle Man

by K. S. Adkins

  When her door opens I outwardly groan and inwardly smile. “She’s also impatient.”

  Coming to my side, she slides her arms around me asking, “If I try to shake his hand will he try and kill me?”

  “No,” I grin. “But let’s not take any chances.”

  Extending his despite my warning he greets her softly saying, “My name is Loon.”

  Leaning forward, she accepts, offering, “I’m Finn.”

  The second he started cataloging her face, I pulled her back to me and was currently trying to place her behind me because Loon wasn’t acting right. Out of all of us, he was also closest to Finn in age.

  Shaking himself of it he wheezes out, “Fuck me, you’re Finn Lee.”

  Pleased by this, she puffs up, positions herself in front of me saying, “You know who I am?”

  “You’re the greatest stuntwoman to ever live!”

  “Fuck,” I groan trying to hold her still but she was not having it and she was freakishly strong. “Stay put, woman.”

  “Oh, zip it,” she rolls her eyes. “You were spanking it to my texts for a year and didn’t know who I was. Now I’ve got a fan and you’re cockblocking.”

  “Cockblocking is prohibiting someone from getting laid, Finn.”

  “You know what I mean,” she waves off.

  “You didn’t know who she was?” Loon accuses. “How is that possible?”

  “I don’t watch movies,” I fire back. Hello, I was a killer!

  “You don’t have to watch movies,” he says moving closer to her. “She’s on YouTube, ESPN, in magazines, everywhere!”

  “Let me guess, you saw her porn—” and when her elbow found the soft tissue of my stomach, I shut my mouth.

  “Anyway, you were saying?” she continues.

  “I follow you on Twitter and Instagram or rather I did. Did you delete it?”

  “Yes,” she smiles sheepishly. “New life and all.”

  “Please tell me you saved all the videos.”

  “Of course,” she actually fucking giggled.

  “I almost pissed myself when you base jumped from the KL Tower.”

  “Did you see me do Macau?”

  “Yes!”

  “Macau?” I interrupt needing to be up to date.

  “Jesus, Phoenix, it’s the highest tower in the world. How do you not know this?”

  “When was Macau?”

  “A few years back.”

  That explains why I haven’t seen it. “Your camera guy went after you and pissed his pants. It was awesome.”

  At the mention of Ryan, Finn started to shut down. “Did I say something wrong?”

  “He was my best friend,” she says sadly. “He died last year wingsuiting.”

  “Fuck, I heard about that. My apologies for that, Finn.”

  “It’s okay,” she forces a smile. “But thank you.”

  “Look,” Loon says backing away. “I came to warn you and I’ve done that. But you’re my brother, Phoenix and if you need me, call.”

  I gave Loon a nod but it was Finn who broke away to hug him. Startled by it, he kept his hands at his sides while mine were on my pistol. I may trust him more than the others but he was still a killer. Whispering in his ear, Loon’s eyes widen, he grins at me and laughed all the way back to his car.

  Pulling her to me I ask, “What did you say to him?”

  “I explained that if he lied and comes at us, how I’d kill him.”

  “Oh yeah?”

  “Uh huh,” she smirks. “Men like their balls, so I’m willing to trust him.”

  Fuck, this woman.

  We were at a mutual friend’s wedding and per our usual, came as each other’s dates.

  Personally, I hated weddings. The crying, the fake tradition and pretense.

  Don't even get me started on the flowers...

  Leaning into me, Ryan asked, “What will your wedding be like?”

  Rolling my eyes, I whisper, “Are you dying to be my maid of honor or something?”

  “I'm serious,” he nudged me. “You want to get married someday, don't you?”

  Deflecting like a pro, I asked, “Do you?”

  With a dreamy look, (which I had never seen before) he said, “Yeah Finn, I'd make a good husband.”

  Back in Detroit, standing in line for coffee, I couldn’t ignore the group of women in front of me that were discussing personal trainers, Botox, the importance of designer shoes and side pieces. I wasn’t envious of their odd dynamic, but God damn, they were seriously entertaining to listen to.

  Since being back in town, Nix has been on edge but not sharing what put him there. So needless to say, someone else’s drama was a nice change to my own. Considering theirs ended with divorce and alimony and mine ended with a painful death...

  Accidentally bumping me, one apologizes then blurts, “Are you married?”

  “No, I’m not married.” Seriously, women were odd and groups of them baffled me...

  “Divorced then,” she pushes for information.

  “No,” I repeat. “I’ve never been married.”

  Hearing this, another chimes in, “How many kids do you have?”

  What was with these women? “No kids either.”

  Stunned, the third practically yells, “So, you what? You work?” as if it was the most distasteful concept in the world.

  “Yes, I work,” I reply although for the last week I haven’t collected a pay check for it. “Why wouldn’t I?”

  Circling, as if I was fresh prey, they start squawking and pointing. Spouting weird shit like, “You need a husband with kids, two marriages under your belt, alimony, a good attorney and a plastic surgeon…”

  Wondering what fucking alternate dimension I was in, I was spared running for it when I felt his hands slide around my waist. Stunned into silence the women openly lusted after Nix who didn’t seem to care about the attention in the slightest.

  “I missed you,” he whispers just loud enough to be heard.

  “Just waiting on our coffee, muffin.”

  “We only need one,” he says seductively. “I’d rather taste mine from your lips.”

  “Okay,” one openly gasps. “He’s got to be married.”

  “No man is that into a woman like that unless he’s married,” another adds.

  “Ladies,” Nix says placing his hands squarely on my ass. “When a man finds his mate, he’s more than into her.”

  Cupping my face, he kisses me deep finishing with, “Because when a man finds his mate, she is all he sees.”

  “You are so getting another blow job,” I promise him publicly.

  “Come on, Kitten,” he says moving away from the gawking housewives of Detroit.

  Now outside, I say, “Thanks for the save. I was starting to panic and ask for Botox referrals.”

  “They forgot cream,” he says staring into his cup.

  Ruffling through my pack, I offer, “Here,” handing him mine.

  “You keep creamer in your backpack?”

  “Everything a girl needs to survive is in this pack.”

  And when he smiled, I did too. Because Nix wasn’t a smiler by nature so when he bestowed them upon me, each felt like a gift. Ryan always got me. He never teased about living out of a pack because he did too. The few times I’d met other men, let’s just say they did not get me. At all. But Phoenix did. Honestly, I could carry around a bag full of fresh shit and he’d think it was precious. Because it was me doing it.

  Placing his palm on the small of my back, he leads us to an empty table where we sat happy to watch the drop-in basketball game.

  Sipping our drinks, content to be in each other’s company, Nix knows something’s up when I keep glancing to my right. “You’ve got a look in your eyes,” he whispers sexily.

  “What look is that?” I ask innocently.

  “The one where I end up out of my comfort zone.”

  Smirking because he was right, I lean in cooing, “Baby, we’re both about to leave our
comfort zones.”

  Because for the last few minutes I’ve been watching a group of teens doing something that I found hilarious while the nearby adults found it annoying.

  A kid stuck in an adult’s body myself, I had to see what it was all about.

  Taking his hand, I haul him up leading us over to the group.

  Game on.

  Some classmate and, no I did not know his name, asked me if I wanted to play flag football. Actually, he wouldn't shut up about it. The third time he asked, I nearly broke his neck. The fourth, I played it cool by simply saying, “No.”

  “We need one more,” he pushed. “Come on, man.”

  “You want me to stuff a flag in my pants, run with a fucking ball so the other guy can try and grab it?”

  “Yes,” he nodded.

  “Tell you what,” I said standing. “Point to the guy who's flag you want and I'll kill him for you.”

  I wasn't cut out for organized sports. Or people.

  Falling in love with Finn through text messages and photos was an easy thing to do.

  Sharing air and space with her was effortless, second nature.

  Fate.

  Where she went, I would follow. This was a given. A vow.

  Finn Lee did not lie, cheat, or steal. She lived, she loved, and she chose me.

  This made me protective. Proprietary.

  She knew the depths to me just as I knew the depths to her. Sometimes they were spoken, most times they were not. During our short time together, I picked up on her wandering, adventurous eyes.

  Finn was a naturally curious, open person. So, when she kept stealing glances at the group of kids, the moment her eyes sparkled I knew she was plotting.

  And I loved that about her too.

  Approaching the group, Finn introduces us by saying, “Whatever you’re doing right now, we want in.”

  “You sure about that?” a kid, no more than sixteen, asks grinning.

  “Maybe you could explain exactly what it is?” I ask semi-patiently.

  Stepping forward, a young girl blushes, “The floor is lava.”

  “No it isn’t,” I grunt.

  “That’s the game,” she blushes even harder.

  “Sounds juvenile,” I roll my eyes and at the same time watch the girl’s face flash hurt.

  “I’m in,” Finn declares by taking the girl by the elbow and scowling at me. The rules of the game took all of three sentences to explain. Basically, you’re minding your own fucking business and when someone says the floor is lava you have five-seconds or less to find safety. The concept is, the more inopportune place the better.

  According to one of the kids, timing is everything.

  So, when she broke off to speak with one of the group, I call out, “Finn?”

  “Yeah?”

  Grinning like a fool, I announce, “The floor is lava.”

  With wide eyes she looks around, bites her lip and, like the dare devil she is, launches herself to the lowest hanging branch of the nearby tree. The group whistled at her agility and my cock got painfully hard.

  The woman was so agile it was scary and I, Phoenix, was the lucky bastard who reaped the benefits.

  Dangling from the branch she asks, “How long do I need to stay up here?”

  Sauntering over, a young male was admiring her toned stomach showing when he says, “If I had my way, forever.”

  You know how far gone you are over a woman when the thought of killing a kid whose balls haven't dropped, held appeal.

  Releasing her grip, she pinched his cheek promising him, “I’m already signed up for forever with him.”

  “Figures,” he huffs turning to walk away in defeat.

  And Finn being a competitive little smart ass, waited until I was clear of all obstacles when she says, “Hey Nix?”

  “Yeah Finn?”

  “The floor is lava.”

  “God dammit!” I groan searching for safety and when I found it, I ran full tilt intending to make it before my time was up. I told myself if she could do it, so could I.

  Soaring forward, I prepared to land fully on the table when I, not only overshot it, but took the fucking thing with me when I hit the pavement.

  Yelling, “Fuck!” Finn comes to kneel beside me asking, “Anything broken?”

  “You make it look too easy,” I grate out in embarrassment.

  “Yeah,” she winks. “I know.”

  And though moments ago, I had hurt the young girl’s feelings, she had the decency to come over offering to help me up. With Finn’s encouraging smile, I allowed it, even giving her a small shoulder squeeze as thanks.

  “I think it’s cool you tried,” she blushes uncontrollably. “Most adults think it’s stupid.”

  “I think it’s cool you helped an old man off the ground,” I praise her. “And most adults forget what it’s like to be a kid so, fuck them.”

  “You didn’t forget,” she says sweetly and awkwardly.

  Locking eyes with my Finn, I explain to the girl, “I had help remembering.”

  “So, is she your girlfriend?”

  Never breaking contact with Finn, I tell the girl, “She is my everything.”

  When Finn and I begin our walk back, we did so with my arm over her shoulder and her head resting on it.

  As it should be.

  “Did you see him?” I asked Ryan.

  Following my line of sight, he asked, “What exactly am I looking for?”

  “The monkey,” I explained pointing high. “He just stole that guy’s wallet!”

  “You walk around staring at the sky,” he laughed. “It amazes me you don't ever run into shit.”

  “It's a gift,” I smiled. “Come on, let's try and steal it back!”

  Before heading back to the hotel Nix said we needed to make two stops.

  The problem with that is, I can't handle his driving.

  Not that he was a bad driver. He wasn't. He was just...leisurely.

  Sighing, I was staring out the window when he says, “What is it, Finn?”

  “I'm not Miss Daisy.”

  “Come again?”

  “Why are you going so slow?”

  “I'm doing the speed limit.”

  “Okay but, why?”

  “Why what?” he counters reasonably. “Am I following the law?” Snorting at that, I caught him muttering, “I like to be cautious.”

  “Wherever we're going, I bet you twenty bucks if I were driving we would be there already.”

  “Zip it, speed racer,” he says linking his fingers with mine. “I've got precious cargo on board.”

  “That's sweet,” I say squeezing his hand. “But I didn't buy this car to coast. There's a reason it has seventeen air bags, Nix. Punch it.”

  And when he did, the adrenaline that coursed through my veins was euphoric. Sailing down the freeway, I watched him handle my car with ease. From leaning his seat back to draping his arm over the steering wheel, it was natural and sexy. A few minutes later, we exited and finally stopped at a park time forgot.

  Following his lead, Nix grabs his duffel from the trunk and we walk over to shady spot and sit in the grass.

  Since he does everything in his own time, I sat content watching him take things out and set up shop.

  Handing me his gun, he says, “Release the mag for me, Finn.”

  Doing just that, I was handing it back when he says, “Now I want you to remove the bolt.”

  Looking it over, I was trying to figure out where that was located when he showed me. “Okay, now you're going to swab the bore.”

  “English, Nix.”

  “You're going to clean the chamber, Finn.”

  “Ah,” I say smiling. That made sense.

  And so it went for the next few minutes. Following his instruction, I cleaned, scrubbed and lubricated all three guns. Proud of myself, I catch him watching me and ask, “What's wrong?”

  “One day,” he says pulling me into his lap. “I'm going to take you on a real date. Hundre
ds of them.”

  Threading my fingers through his hair, I promise him, “No matter where we are or what we're doing, it will always be the best date ever.”

  “What do you like best about yourself?” he asks quietly and I knew my answer was important to him.

  Thinking on it, I answer, “No matter how old I get, I'm always going to look up.” When his face softens, I continue, “The world, no matter how fucked, fascinates me. The little things, big things, unexplainable things. People I've met, memories I've made, the fact that I'm here. The crazy energy that surrounds us, sunrise, all the small wonders...” Seeing him frown I ask, “What?”

  “You really feel that way, don't you?”

  Sitting up I ask, “Don't you?”

  “I do, but only because you let me see the world through your eyes.”

  Kissing his lips, I promise him, “I'll show you everything, Nix.”

  On the way back, I didn't comment on his driving.

  Because I was happy just to be next to him.

  Oh, and it helped that we didn't have any particular place to be.

  About a year and a half ago, the Operator happened to call me at a bad time. It was midnight, I couldn't sleep and my hands were shaking. The only thought keeping me awake was, I almost died today.

  And had that happened, no one would miss me. There was no legacy to my name, no wife, kids, or friends to notify. This depressed me, made me angry. Because I had willingly walked away from my life and for what?

  To be forgotten? Hell, he would replace my ass within the hour.

  So when she asked, “Why do I hear finality in your voice, Phoenix?”

  I was drunk enough to say, “Because the next time someone tries to kill me, I'll let them.”

  And in that moment, I meant it.

  Being with Finn made you think, reevaluate, and appreciate.

  To have her outlook on life...Hell, just being a part of her life was surreal. Because Finn was contagious.

  She infected you with her smiles, touches, and positivity. Finn challenged me in every way.

  Even now, as the bathtub was filling and she was on the other side of the door, I wanted to be where she was.

  Happy to sit on the toilet while she shaved her legs, washed her face, and whatever other shit women did.