Money Never Sleeps

by Tu-Shonda Whitaker

  “Jaise, didn’t we agree on a truce?”

  “Girl, please. A truce among this clique means I won’t call you a bitch to your face. I’ll let you hear about it.”

  “Damn.” Vera chuckled. “Well, when I start calling bitches”—she swished her feet around in the water—“it will not be behind your damn back. And what the hell is a hood bugger?”

  “We’ve arrived,” Milan announced as she and Chaunci walked into the room, also dressed in white terry-cloth robes.

  “You still want me to answer that?” Jaise mumbled. “Ladies,” she said as Milan and Chaunci entered. “Glad you could make it.”

  “We were stuck in traffic,” Milan said as she and Chaunci took their seats and dipped their feet into the water. “You know New York City.”

  “Where’s Al-Taniesha?” Chaunci asked.

  Bridget, who stood next to Carl, answered. “She said she didn’t have time to be here today.”

  “Why?” Jaise pried.

  “Said something about she and Lollipop are opening up a Chinese food/nail salon.”

  “What?” Milan laughed. “Are you serious?”

  “You know Al-Taniesha,” Jaise said. “Somebody probably taught her how to say chicken wing and full set in Chinese and she lost her damn mind.”

  All the women laughed until tears formed in their eyes. “I get so tired of that bitch,” Jaise continued. “I swear she was placed on this Earth to haunt my ass.”

  “You do know she’s not going anywhere,” Chaunci said. “Especially since your son has a baby with her daughter.”

  “Tell me about it,” Jaise said as the spa’s host served each woman a glass of champagne.

  Milan sipped. “Speaking of babies, Jaise, I heard from this little birdie that your son had another one. Seems he has a thing against using protection.”

  “And what does that have to do with you?” Jaise asked, annoyed.

  “Well, since we agreed on a truce I figured I’d ask you and not pose the question in a tabloid.” She chuckled. “I’m only kidding about the tabloid.”

  Jaise paused. She crossed her ankles in the water and did away with her first thought, which was to tell Milan to mind her own fuckin’ business because last she checked, the weeds in her garden needed tending to. But instead she remained silent.

  As far as Jaise was concerned Milan was ignorant. She had to be, because there was no way she understood the gut-wrenching turmoil her flip comments caused Jaise. Because if she did, she’d shut the fuck up and realize that the hurt and anguish Jaise felt behind not having a stellar kid and having failed as a mother was enough for her to snap at any moment, get up out of her chair, grip Milan by the roots of her hair, and drag her ass.

  Jaise cleared her throat. “I think you better stick to discussing your engagement and leave my son alone.”

  “I only asked a question,” Milan said. “I mean, you were the one bragging and everything at the reunion about how great Jabril was doing, headed to Morehouse and all.”

  “What’s he doing now?” Chaunci asked. “Community college, at least?”

  Jaise looked toward Vera whose eyes clearly said, “Handle ’em.” And then she looked toward the camera and decided that she would check them, but she wouldn’t stoop to their level to do it, she’d drop even lower.

  “I was upset.” Jaise admitted. “But you know he’s only nineteen, not thirty-plus acting as if he’s a man. And hell, it’s not like these girls are as old as you two.” She pointed to Chaunci and Milan. “I mean, Jesus, according to what I heard, you were crying, Milan, about Kendu not thanking you at his retirement dinner, and all I could think was, ‘Why would a man thank a woman who’s always available to be used?’ Last I checked jump-off was a thankless position.”

  “Checkmate.” Vera laughed as she lay back in her chair and the aesthetician placed cucumber slices over her eyes.

  “You’re going too far,” Milan warned.

  “Oh, my goodness, am I really?” Jaise clutched her chest and said in an exaggerated southern drawl. “And you, Chaunci. I mean, my goodness, how did you feel when you proposed to a man and hadn’t even checked to see if he already had a wife?”

  Chaunci was completely taken by surprise.

  “Seems we have the same birdie,” Jaise said as the aesthetician began to paint her face with a vanilla scrub. “Oh, that scrub smells delicious.”

  “Truthfully, Jaise,” Chaunci said. “As far as I’m concerned the busted bitch can have Idris.”

  “Damn, he left you for a busted bitch, oh, my,” Jaise said. “That’s even worse.”

  Vera laughed as she lifted a cucumber slice from over one eye. “I could’ve sworn we said we were going to move on from the pettiness.”

  “Touché,” Jaise agreed. “But hey, all’s fair in love and bitch-slaps.”

  “Look, I didn’t come here to start drama,” Milan said. “I came here to have a relaxing time. And I just figured I’d ask you to your face, Jaise, what I wanted to know.”

  “Exactly,” Chaunci said. “But Vera’s right. Let’s end this before it turns into a war.”

  “Yeah, let’s,” Milan agreed.

  The women were silent for the next half hour. The harpist’s melody was the only sound in the room until Jaise turned to Chaunci and said. “Honestly, Chaunci, I know how you feel. I mean, last year when I caught Trenton with that trick he was sleeping with, you were there for me, so if you need anything, advice, whatever I can offer, just let me know.”

  “Thanks, Jaise,” Chaunci said, as she lay on the massage table with her arms crossed under her chin, and the therapist kneading her shoulders. “I’m trying like hell to let the shit go. But it’s soooo hard.”

  “Do you still love him?” Jaise asked.

  “I think so,” Chaunci said. “But I’m confused. When he was with me, I wasn’t so sure, but now that he’s with that bitch Shannon, I feel like I did love him. And I feel like she took my man from me. And I know it sounds crazy and immature, but I truly feel like this heifer kidnapped his ass and now this motherfucker has Stockholm syndrome.”

  “Which means you really didn’t love him,” Jaise said. “You just didn’t expect him to want anyone else.”

  “Maybe you have a point,” Chaunci admitted.

  “Or maybe your time was up,” Vera squinted. “Nobody has to wait for you to get it together.”

  “Obviously so,” Chaunci said. “Because Idris is Mr. Happy with his new wife, her son, and my daughter.”

  “Does Kobi like her?” Jaise asked.

  “She just met her the other day,” Chaunci said. “And when Shannon and Idris introduced her son to Kobi they introduced him as Kobi’s brother. ‘We don’t use the term “step,” Shannon said. ‘We’re a family.’ I wanted to scream, ‘No, bitch you’re not family! I’m family. You’re nothing.’ Honestly, I wanted to kick her fuckin’ ass!”

  “Baby mama isn’t quite standing up next to wife.” Vera interjected, taking the cucumber slices off of her eyes. “So she was right. They are a family.”

  “Yeah, pretty much,” Jaise said. “They are a family and if she’s anything like my ex-husband’s new wife she’s going to remind you that she’s his wife every damn chance she gets. Bitch.”

  “And furthermore,” Vera said. “You should be happy she wants to embrace your child. Any mature woman who marries a man with a child is going to love the child as if it were her own. And second of all, it really pisses me off that women always want to fight one another. But I have yet to hear a woman say she wants to kick a man’s ass. Shannon doesn’t owe you anything. And I mean, really, if you didn’t love Idris, or if you did love him, but you blew your chance, then you should understand that life will go on—with or without you.”

  “Oh, please,” Milan said. “How the hell is he going to ask her to marry him and seven months later he shows up with some skank on his arm? Give me a break.”

  “Listen, that’s a question that Chaunci needs to ask him,” Vera s
aid. “But Shannon didn’t ask him to marry her. It was the other way around. Hell, maybe he was seeing her before Chaunci crept back into his life. I watched the show last season. Don’t you think he had a life before he met back up with you? Shit, it’s not your world and things happen without you.”

  Chaunci looked Vera over. “Well, you seem to know a lot more about the situation than I do. You wanna tell me why you’re getting so upset, you act as if you know the bitch or something.”

  “Actually,” Vera leaned forward. “I do.”

  “What?” Chaunci said shocked and the other women fell silent.

  “Yes, I do. Shannon is my childhood friend and I mean, you seem cool, but all that rah-rah you’re talking, you need to bring that down, because where I’m from bitches get their asses beat for talking too much.”

  “Ding!” Bridget said as she snickered.

  Chaunci was shocked. “So all of this time you listened to me moan and complain and you and Idris’s wife are best fuckin’ friends! You should’ve told me that!”

  “I don’t owe you any explanations!” Vera spat. “I know how to be cordial to you and be best friends with my best friend. The only difference now is you know not to come out the side of your mouth about Shannon.”

  “Well how about this?” Chaunci rose from her chair.

  “You can stand up,” Vera said. “But I don’t advise you to bring your ass over here.”

  “Now, ladies,” Jaise said. “Let’s remember our truce.”

  “Fuck a truce,” Chaunci spat. “Here I am thinking perhaps I can build a friendship with all of you and all this time Vera’s friends with Idris’s wife. That is so fucked up. You should’ve told me that from the jump and then it would’ve been my decision how much of my life I wanted to share with you.”

  “Like I said,” Vera stressed. “I don’t owe you any explanations. Now if you want to be friends, then cool, let’s be friendly, but if you want a war, I’m letting you know upfront, don’t bring any knives to gunfights.”

  “And make sure you take your own advice.” Chaunci looked toward Milan. “I’m leaving because I need a drink.”

  “I’m right behind you.”

  Milan and Chaunci switched out the room and as they stepped through the door Jaise and Vera looked at each other and fell out laughing. “Betchu they learn to shut the fuck up now,” Jaise said.

  Chaunci

  The day’s sun faded into Manhattan’s evening sky, streaking the air with highlights of gold and fire red as Chaunci stood on her terrace and held a wine glass in the air. “Honestly,” she said as she looked into the camera. “I didn’t like the bitch from the first hello. So that little spa date did nothing more than open the coffin shut … shut the coffin … nail it open.” Her words slurred slightly. “You get my point.”

  I better give the wine a rest.

  Bridget smiled. “You all have the same terms of endearment for one another so please tell the camera which bitch you’re talking about.”

  “Vera.” Chaunci sipped and lifted her eyes above the glass. “And it has nothing to do with Shannon. And by the way I read a blog the other day that claimed an insider said I was jealous of Vera, so let me just take a moment and straighten that shit out.”

  “So what’s your response?” Bridget asked.

  Chaunci tilted her head to the side. “My response is hell-the-fuck no.” She turned the wine bottle over her glass and only three drops plopped out.

  Did I drink this whole bottle?

  “Anyway,” Chaunci continued. “Jaise may be kissing Vera’s ass and Milan may be laid back and trying to be friendly, but I’m not scared of Vera. Her l’il ‘I used to be a cripette’ or whatever the hell routine she has, doesn’t intimidate me. I will curse Vera out and take her ass down if I have to. And you can put all my money on that.”

  I hope I am not coming across as drunk as I feel. Damn, I need a V8.

  “Vera seems to be very strong-willed,” Bridget said. “And she doesn’t back down from much. In a lot of ways you two are alike.”

  “Chile, please.” Chaunci tooted her lips and waved her hand. “Her greatest wish is to be like me. But that’s just not going to happen, now is it?” she said sarcastically. Motioning her hands like a scale she said, “Journalism.” She lifted one hand high. “And hair grease.” The other hand sank. “Not. Even. In the same league.”

  “Pardon me, Ms. Morgan.” Dextra, Chaunci’s Trinidadian au pair, stood in the doorway. “Kobi called. She say it’s story time on de sky or some’ting like dat,” Dextra said confused. “I asked her to hold and she say she would meet you on the computer.”

  Chaunci struggled to sound sober as she said to Dextra, “When she’s at her dad’s we do story time via Skype.”

  “Skype? What tis dat?” Dextra asked.

  “It’s a visual conversation on the computer. She sees me and I see her.”

  “Ai-yi-yi. You young people. Well, she’s waiting for you and I’m going to be leaving now. I’ll see you in a few days when Kobi returns.”

  “Goodnight, Antie.” Chaunci waved.

  “Goodnight, my dear.” She walked out of the doorway and a few moments later closed the front door behind her.

  “Dextra has been a part of our family since Kobi was a baby and we wouldn’t trade her for the world.” Chaunci did her all not to tilt to one side or the other as she walked toward her home office. Never before had walking this short distance in her apartment been a struggle. Knocking off an entire bottle of Chardonnay was not her intention. Her intention was to simply have a glass of wine with her dinner—two glasses at most—enough to chase away the loneliness that nested in her chest and the horniness that crept between her thighs.

  Chaunci took a deep breath and turned on the computer. She logged onto Skype and in a few seconds Kobi appeared on the screen. She sat in the center of a pink canopy bed and was dressed in a hot pink tutu, a sleeveless Princess Tiana night shirt, and a tiara tilted on her head.

  Her chin rested in her left palm as her eyes drooped, her top lip was tucked in and her bottom lip was poked out. “Hi, mommy,” she said with a drag. “It’s story time.” She held up the book on her lap.

  “Hi, baby.” Chaunci paused. Would you get your drunk ass together? “Why do you look so sad?”

  “No reason.” Kobi flipped her book open. “I’m ready to read so that I can go to bed.”

  “What’s wrong, Kobi? Tell mommy.”

  Tears filled Kobi’s eyes and ran over her cheeks.

  Chaunci’s heart pounded and suddenly she felt sober again. “Kobi, look at me.” Kobi complied and Chaunci continued. “Please, tell me what’s wrong.”

  Kobi ran her fingers across her lips. “I have to learn to zip it. I’ve already said too much. And Shannon told me if I spilled the beans it would be big trouble. I don’t want her trouble, Mommy. She knows karate.”

  Am I hearing right? Maybe I’m still drunk. I need a cup of coffee. “Kobi, you can tell Mommy anything.”

  “Mommy, you have to promise not to say a word.” She folded her hands in a prayers position and shook them. “Please. I need to see my daddy again and Shannon told me if I opened my fat mouth that I wouldn’t be able to visit them anymore. And Mommy, I don’t want to be without my daddy anymore. Remember I used to cry at night because I wanted a daddy? Now I have one, I don’t want to make him go away. I’m just going to be quiet and do whatever Shannon says.”

  “Wait a minute. Wait a motherfuckin—” Chaunci paused. Woosaaaa … She exhaled slowly. “Kobi, start from the beginning. What exactly happened?”

  Kobi swallowed. Chaunci could see the hesitancy and fear on her face.

  “It’s okay,” Chaunci said calmly. “You can tell Mommy anything.”

  “Mommy,” Kobi sniffed. “Shannon’s mean.”

  Chaunci’s heart thundered. Don’t jump to conclusions. “Why do you think she’s mean?”

  “She told me I had to go to bed. But Omari got to stay up and watch T.V.
And mommy, Ms. Vera’s daughter, Skyy, is over here and she and Omari were teasing me, saying I had a big mouth and that’s why I had to go to bed.” She sobbed.

  Chaunci looked at the clock: 8:00 p.m. Don’t go flying over there. Relax. She took a deep breath. Now ask her where Idris is. “Kobi, where is your daddy?”

  “He and Shannon are out getting their party on. I think they’re at a club.”

  “Who’s there with you and the other two children?”

  “This mean old lady name Aunt Cookie who told me that I was too grown.”

  “Why did she say that?”

  “No reason at all. I just told her that a woman didn’t have to settle for a man just because he was fine and that Ms. Shannon should learn that.”

  Chaunci blinked. “Why would you say something like that? Where did you get that from?”

  “I heard you tell Ms. Milan that once. And I overheard Shannon complaining that my daddy was getting on her nerves and if he wasn’t so fine she would teach him a lesson. I just called myself being helpful, Mommy. But Aunt Cookie told Shannon and now they both turned on me.”

  “You shouldn’t have said that, Kobi.”

  “You’re taking her side?”

  “No. I’m always on your side, but right is right. Now tell me about the part where she said you should zip it or you won’t see your daddy again.”

  “Because after Aunt Cookie told on me, Shannon said, ‘You need to learn to shut up and zip it! I can’t stand you. And if you keep talking, not only am I going to beat your behind, you will not be able to come over here again!’ ”

  “Oh really?” Chaunci arched her brow. “And where was your daddy?”

  “He just stood there.”

  “He just stood there!” Chaunci rose from her chair and paced before the computer. She turned back toward the computer screen. “I’m coming to get you.”

  “No, Mommy.” Kobi’s eyes widened. “Then Daddy will be mad at me and I won’t see him again.”

  You’re right because I’ma kill the motherfucker. “Kobi, nothing will come between you and your daddy.”