Light Within Me

by Fall, Carly

  He didn’t bother with the elevator, but headed for the stairs. As he flew down the nine flights, he wondered again why he had chosen to live on the bottom fucking floor.

  He threw open the door to his room and slammed it shut. He plopped down on the edge of his bed and put his elbows on his knees, his head in his hands, his breath sawing in and out of his lungs. Self-hatred bathed his very soul. Hatred for what he was, what he never could be. He could never be a proper mate to Abby. His duty always came first. Even if there was a chance in hell that she would accept him for what he was, he could never fully give himself over to her. He had to complete what he was sent to do. His duty forced it; his honor demanded it.

  “Fuck.”

  He felt his eyes stinging as if they had dirt in them. He wiped his eyes with his fingers and they came back wet. Okay, there wasn’t sand in his eyes, so what was this? Was he . . . crying?

  He let out a long litany of curses and went to his closet. Where was that damn bottle? He didn’t see it, and began unloading his closet. He knew the shittin’ thing was in there somewhere.

  His phone rang, and he took it out of his pocket, hope rising in his chest. He saw that it was Cohen.

  “Fuck off,” he said as he threw the phone across the room, shattering it. He realized the error of his ways as he watched the thing smash into what seemed like a million pieces as it hit the wall. Now Abby would never be able to get ahold of him. Not that he expected her to, but hope sprang eternal and all that.

  He could get a new phone from Talin. He turned back to the closet and found the bottle wrapped up in a sleeping bag. He had obviously been worried about thievery among the other males he lived with.

  He cracked it and took a swig. The shit burned.

  Burned good.

  He went to the phone at his bedside and dialed Cohen’s number.

  “Why are you calling on the house phone?”

  Noah cursed. “I need a new phone.”

  “Sure, my man. I’ll get one from Talin and bring it down in a minute. Just so you know, I’m bringing Jovan for backup. Hudson informed me you were ready to kill something. Jovan’s still got his gun strapped to his chest from his trip to Cali, and he’ll shoot you if you get out of hand.”

  Noah didn’t think Cohen was particularly funny, but he did admire the male’s smarts. “All right. I promise not to lay a hand on you. Bring me a phone, asshole.”

  They arrived a few minutes later. Jovan looked tired. Exhausted. If Noah didn’t know better, he would guess the male had been partying for six weeks instead of hunting a Colonist. He was big, just like all of them, standing right around six foot five, give or take a couple of inches, and hovering in the two-fifty, two-seventy-five range. His blonde hair hung limply to his jawline. Noah realized it must have gone dark outside, as Jovan’s eyes burned a bright emerald green. He was dressed in camo pants, a black tank top, and boots, and Cohen hadn’t been kidding—the male still had his gun strapped to his chest.

  Noah assumed he looked as bad as he felt. Wrecked. He was fucking wrecked. He stood in the middle of the room with the bottle. He knew his shirt was wrinkled, his hair was a mess, and his feet were bare. He really didn’t care.

  He took another swig.

  “Anything in Sacramento?” he asked Jovan.

  The male looked at Noah, a little surprise flaring in his eyes, and shook his head.

  Noah nodded, thinking he must look really bad. Worse than he thought. He focused on Cohen, really wanting to kill him.

  He needed to clear the air with the male. “Why did you lie to me?”

  Cohen looked up. “Excuse me?”

  “Why the fuck did you lie to me? Why did you tell me that human females can’t see our SR44 forms?”

  Cohen looked confused. Honestly confused. “I didn’t lie. They can’t.”

  “Bullshit. I had a female call me on it today!” Noah bellowed. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jovan putting his hand on the gun.

  Shock crossed Cohen’s face. “Impossible,” he whispered. “That can’t happen, Noah. Think about it. Humans can’t see the ash the Colonists leave. I’ve been with plenty of human women, and none have ever told me I’m glowing. Same with Hudson. No one had ever called him on going jaundice. All of us have been with human women. Not one has ever said anything.”

  Noah lost some of his bluster. Not just from the fact that Jovan had a hand on his gun, but because he could tell that Cohen was telling the truth.

  “It happened to me today,” Noah said, and fell into the big gray chair. Silence filled the room. Noah wasn’t sure what surprised them more—the fact that he had actually been with a human female, or that she had seen his SR44 form.

  “Tell us what happened, Noah,” Jovan finally said, as he came over and sat down in the chair across from Noah.

  Noah took a deep breath and told the whole story. About being busted on the photo. The glow. Being kicked out of the female’s house.

  “She shouldn’t be allowed to live, Noah,” Jovan said. “She now knows of our existence. It’s unacceptable. It’s dangerous to us.”

  “That’s not up for discussion, Jovan,” Noah said in a deadly, quiet voice. “If that woman even gets a scratch on her, I will rain the fires of Hell down on everyone who lives here.”

  Jovan’s eyes flared in surprise, but he nodded. “Apparently, some things have changed around here in the past few weeks since I’ve been gone,” he murmured.

  “We at least need to find out how she can see your SR44 form, Noah,” Cohen said quietly. “There’s a possibility that she may not even be human. Maybe she’s one of the Colonists who has taken on a human female form and is out to kill you. Did you think of that?”

  Noah opened his mouth to argue, then shut it. He didn’t have an argument. He had never been with a human woman before, so he didn’t know if the feel of her skin, the smell of her hair, or her wonderful taste was normal or not. He did think of their time together, and she had had ample opportunity to cap his ass. She had never shown any type of aggression toward him whatsoever. She had been kind in her ways, loving in her touch.

  “I don’t know about that. I don’t think she wants me dead. She’s had plenty of time and situations to make that happen,” Noah said quietly. He took another sip of his bottle. “But, I will explore the possibility that she’s not human. I’ll go there. Hell, we’re here, the vampires have been around for forever and a day, and who knows what else may come out of the woodwork. Maybe she’s some new species or something. So, yeah, I’ll go there.”

  Cohen and Jovan nodded. “We should talk to her as soon as possible,” Cohen said.

  “Are you going to share that shit or what?” Jovan asked. Noah handed him the bottle, and Jovan took a hit.

  Noah took a deep breath, resigned. He needed to visit the lovely Abby tomorrow. “Okay. We’ll go and see her tomorrow. Jovan, you look like shit and like you haven’t slept in a week. Or maybe a few weeks. Cohen, you and Hudson are going with me to talk to her.”

  Cohen’s eyebrows made a run for his forehead. “Me? Hudson?”

  Noah nodded, a small smile played over his face. “Yep. She met Hudson and liked him. He’s my wingman. You . . . you’re not her type. She likes the good-looking ones.”

  Chapter 32

  They never made it to Abby’s the next day. Noah called her over and over, and she never picked up. Worry raged through him, and Cohen wasn’t any help.

  “We should just go see her,” Cohen said.

  “No. When I left, she was freaked out, and I don’t want to make it worse showing up with you and Hudson. I don’t want to scare her more.”

  Cohen sighed. “She could be putting together a wonderful exposé on the aliens who have come to visit as we speak, Noah. This shit needs to get cleared up!”

  Noah ignored him.

  The coroner had given them the approximate time of death, and they gathered and watched the video feed Talin had hooked on his computer for four hours in the War Ro
om on a huge screen that hung from the ceiling. They saw cars and people come and go. It was mind-numbing work. They stopped every hour, all of them stretching, Noah checking his cell phone for the forty millionth time, hoping for a call from Abby.

  Cohen and Rayner headed outside to toss around a football while Hudson went upstairs to get something to eat. Talin fooled around on the computer, and Jovan stayed seated, his big arms across his chest.

  A half hour later, they were back at it.

  They watched every grainy frame, looking for any indication that they were seeing their guy. Hudson had taken a picture of where he found the ashy footprint, and all they needed to do was wait for a male to put his foot there. A couple came close, and they froze the frame and did some measurements, disqualifying them.

  This went on all day. They watched, they stopped, they extrapolated, they measured, they argued, and then moved on.

  All of them were restless and irritated. None of them, except Talin, did well sitting for long periods of time, and even Talin beginning to get edgy.

  When they had hit the end of the fourth hour of feed, they all cursed violently. None of them wanted to go back and do a repeat.

  “Just to pummel my brain a little more with boredom, let’s watch the next hour,” Noah growled. Maybe the coroner had been off on his timing. It wouldn’t be the first time, and it most certainly wouldn’t be the last.

  Fifteen minutes in, a small black car pulled to the curb. The hairs on Noah’s neck began to jitterbug, and he knew this was it.

  “Get a make on the car,” he said to no one in particular. There wasn’t a front plate.

  All of them went dead still. They all felt it too. They watched as a male emerged from the car and stepped onto the sidewalk, took a look around, and then he began walking as if he hadn’t a care in the world.

  He was back twenty minutes later with the same slow, nowhere-to-go gait that he had left with.

  “C’mon, you cocksucker,” Talin said under his breath, sitting forward in his chair. They were all waiting for the male to put his foot where they needed it to go to identify him as one of theirs.

  And then he did.

  “Yes!” Rayner hissed, standing and spiking the football to the ground.

  Talin froze the frame and they all stared. “Gentleman, meet Colonist Number Seven,” he said.

  “It would be too easy if we could get a license plate,” Hudson said.

  “Let’s see if Lady Luck is on our side this evening,” Talin said. He hit play again, and they watched the car drive away, no license plate showing.

  “Well, at least we have a face,” Hudson said, as they all took in the very ordinary, non-descript face. The eyes looked dark, as well as the hair. It was a white male, but judging his height was difficult due to the camera angle. All turned to look at Noah. It must have gone dark outside because he was met with bright blue eyes of Talin, the yellow of Hudson, the violet of Cohen, the green of Jovan, and the red eyes of Rayner.

  “Yes, we do,” he said. “Yes, we do. Talin, do a B&E on the online mug shots from the Carson City Sheriff’s office. Run your face-recognition program on it.”

  Talin nodded.

  “Cohen, Hudson, I need you to stay here and help Talin when I go to Reno. Rayner and Jovan are with me tomorrow. We have some business to take care of there.”

  Jovan and Rayner nodded agreement.

  “Anyone up for some pool?” Hudson asked. There were yeses all around, and they made their way upstairs.

  Someone put on some AC/DC and cranked it. Someone else put a beer in everyone’s hand. They drew straws to see what the teams would be. As they laughed and talked smack, Noah worried about Abby. He figured she probably didn’t want anything to do with him. He just hoped like hell she was safe. He thought about that big window in her living room, the weak lock on her door, and her being on the first floor of the building. A knot formed in his gut. He vowed he would see her tomorrow with his own eyes to make sure she was okay. And if she didn’t want anything to do with him, he promised himself he would check up on her every now and then until . . . well, until forever.

  Chapter 33

  Abby felt bad for not answering her phone all day yesterday. She really did. She had lost count of how many times Noah had called. She just didn’t have anything to say to him, the being not from this planet. She was having trouble processing everything he had told her and she wasn’t ready to speak to him.

  She came out of the mind-numbing work meeting and went to her desk. She checked her cell phone. Noah had tried to call again. Three times. She checked her watch and decided she would head home for lunch. She hadn’t been able to go home yesterday due to a doctor’s appointment, but today, to save a few bucks, she would go home and slather some peanut butter on some bread and call it nutritious. Once there, she would call Noah.

  Just as Abby arrived at her apartment, she parked her car and called Noah. He answered immediately. “Abby?”

  She had to smile in spite of herself. “Hi, Noah.”

  “I’ve been trying to get ahold of you,” he said quietly.

  She got out of the car and headed up the walk to her apartment, her heels clicking on the cement. “I’m very aware of that, Noah. But I’m . . . I’m just having trouble with everything you told me. I guess my brain isn’t processing it all that well, and I just need some time.”

  There was silence as she put her key into the vestibule door.

  “Look, Abby, I’m sorry about all of it, I really am. But you have to understand—“

  Abby gasped as she looked at the door to her apartment. It was slightly ajar, but there wasn’t any sign of forced entry. In her haste to get to work this morning had she forgotten to shut it all the way?

  “What’s wrong, Abby?” Noah said in a low tone.

  “Nothing. It just looks like I didn’t get the door to my apartment shut all the way this morning.”

  Noah was silent for a moment. “Don’t go in there, Abby,” he said with deadly calm.

  “Noah, don’t be silly. I was in a hurry this morning and just didn’t shut the door all the way. Hopefully Neptune’s still around.”

  She pushed the door open and took a step in.

  “This is weird,” she said, coming to a stop just inside the door.

  “What?” Noah growled.

  “There’s this . . . it’s like a black ash on the floor.”

  “Get out of there now!” Noah bellowed in the phone. “Now Abby, get out now!”

  He scared her so bad she dropped her purse and turned for the vestibule door. She heard footsteps coming from down the hall, and then she saw a figure in the doorway of her bedroom out of the corner of her eye.

  “Abby!” Noah yelled. “Run. Get the fuck out of there and run!” She heard him take a deep breath as she hit the walkway leading to the sidewalk.

  “Go somewhere public,” he said more calmly, but hysteria still filtering through his voice. “And whatever you do, do not let go of your phone.” She made it to the sidewalk and looked at the big picture window of her apartment. And there stood a dark figure.

  She watched as he made his way for the door leading outside.

  Abby kicked off her heels and ran down the street, cursing herself for dropping her purse, which contained her car keys. It would have been a much easier getaway in her car. If the damn thing would have started, which was always a crapshoot.

  “He’s coming after me!” she huffed into the phone, panic flowing through her freely now. Noah told her to go somewhere public. Where should she go? Her brain was frozen. She looked behind her and saw the man running down the sidewalk after her.

  She brought the phone down from her ear to get her arms pumping more. The good news was that she had run track in high school and college, so she knew the drill. She hiked her skirt to get more leg movement, cursing that she had worn the damn thing.

  The bad news was that she had excelled at sprints, not long distance. She was already winded, the muscles i
n her legs beginning to burn.

  She heard yelling from the phone and brought it up to her ear. “Get this motherfucking car in high gear, Jovan! I don’t give a shit if you need to run over puppies and old people! One of ours is after Abby!”

  She brought the phone down and turned the corner, taking an uphill side street that she knew led up to the back of shopping complex that housed a J.C. Penney, a Chuck E. Cheese, a Home Depot, and other miscellaneous shops. She looked behind her—the man was closing in. She couldn’t see his face. A dark cap was pulled down to shade most of it. She noted he also had on black track pants and a black T-shirt.

  “Abby, where are you?” Noah yelled.

  She was certain her lungs were going to explode as her legs pumped up the hill. Her feet hurt and her legs burned. She couldn’t talk right now; she had to concentrate on where she was going to hide because she simply couldn’t keep running for much longer.

  When she saw the shopping complex in front of her, she forced her legs to go faster with renewed purpose.

  “Abby! Jesus, Abby! Where are you?” It wasn’t a question being yelled at her anymore, but more of a demand for an answer.

  She looked behind her one more time. He continued to gain on her. She brought the phone up. “J.C. Penney. By my house.” She saw the back employee door was open. “Employees’ entrance at the back.”

  She brought the phone down from her face, her cheeks wet from tears. She wasn’t sure if they were from the exertion or the fear.

  In the distance, she heard the roar of an engine like whoever was driving wanted to be Mario Andretti. Either that, or a Grade-A asshole.

  She prayed it was Noah.

  Just as she was about to duck into the employee entrance, she heard a hiss behind her, and then she was skidding across the blacktop. It felt like she was in a slow-motion movie. Her hands hit the ground first, and she watched her phone fly from her fist as if it had suddenly developed wings. Then her knees hit, then her face. The impact burned, like someone had just set fire to her skin, and it seemed to go on for much longer than needed. She felt the weight of someone on her back, and she could only assume that it was the man. Defeat raged through her body as she finally came to a stop on the blacktop. She blinked once and saw the phone skid to the underside of a dumpster. Her hair was being ripped and her head being lifted off the ground.