Never Never Land

by Treva Harte

  She stood up, made sure she paid for her share of the bill, and headed for the sign marked “Restrooms.”

  The door to the men’s room was slightly ajar. As far as she could tell, it didn’t look like there was anyone there. Jenni hesitated. Maybe everything was all right. Obviously, there was no brawl going on among the urinals.

  Oh hell, why stop now? Might as well make sure. She stepped boldly in where no woman had gone before.

  “Excuse me!” A man ‑‑ fortunately a completely dressed man ‑‑ scurried for the door.

  “Sorry.” Jenni mouthed to him.

  “Jesus, and women call us kinky!” He glared at her, and Jenni shrugged helplessly.

  Well, that was embarrassing. But at least he hadn’t announced her presence. Then again, he might be indignantly speaking to the manager this second. She might not have much time. She didn’t want much time.

  The only occupant left was behind a closed stall ‑‑ thank heaven ‑‑ and his feet looked about as large as Cole’s. Dress shoes. No sandals. Jake always wore sandals.

  All right, maybe Jake hadn’t lied after all. On the other hand, here was her chance.

  She took a calculated risk.

  “I think you need to know something.” She stepped closer to the stall door. “Is that you? Cole?”

  She heard a grunt.

  “All right, then. The answer is no. Hell fucking no. Got it? N.O. And you want to know why? It’s not because you aren’t physically attractive, although I’m really repelled by your asshole attitude. And it’s not that Jake isn’t everyone’s dream, because he’s gorgeous, inside and out. Neither of us would screw you, separately or together, because you hurt him.” She banged the door for emphasis. “I don’t know why he put up with you at all and I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but as his friend, I’m telling you, don’t go near him again. He’s ready to try to tear you apart if he sees you, and you aren’t worth the effort. Have I spelled things out well enough?”

  This time she kicked the door.

  It swung open.

  Oops.

  Jenni stared. Now here was something she really hadn’t expected to see in this men’s room.

  “Oh no,” she whispered.

  “Oh yes.” Luis Morales leaned against the wall. He almost smiled. “Hello, Jenni. You want me to tell you your rights? Or should we take time first to find out if your friend really is going to try to tear someone apart outside?”

  * * * * *

  Jake ground the cigarette out under his foot and stared at the man in front of him. “I pulled you out here to warn you where Jenni can’t hear.”

  “You think you’re going to scare me, Jake?”

  “Shut up. It’s not that you disrespected me. I probably deserve it for putting up with you. But you’re not going to treat Jenni like that again. Ever.”

  Cole looked as serious as Jake had ever seen him. Not nervous, even though Jake wanted to grind him, not his cigarette, into the ground. Not sorry, either. Asshole.

  “I never meant to do that. Apparently I made a mistake but ‑‑”

  “She’s a good person and a good friend, and you…aren’t. No wonder you got us all wrong. You wouldn’t understand anything about what Jenni is and why we hang together.”

  “I know you’re not that into women but are you telling me you wouldn’t ever touch her? Don’t try to shit me.” Cole stared at him. “I’ve seen you two.”

  Jake took a deep breath and let it out. No. He was taking Jenni home, not getting thrown into jail. Not this time. “Well, yeah, you’re sort of right. I love her. She loves me. But that doesn’t mean I’d screw her. And never the way you had in mind. Not with you. Not because I wouldn’t ever be interested, because I’m a guy and I could see a time and a place when I might be. But because it wouldn’t mean anything with you around. And if it meant nothing, that means we’re not right for Jenni. She deserves better than me and damn well better than you.”

  “Jake ‑‑”

  “I wanted to punch your face in a few minutes ago. But fuck that. You’re not worth the energy.” Jake turned his head and saw Jenni staring at him. He gentled his tone down. “Hey, baby.”

  “Defending my honor, Jake?” She tried to smile.

  “Saying good-bye to an asshole and hanging on to a friend. That’s all.” He didn’t bother to see if Cole had left. It didn’t matter any more. He damn well wasn’t going to let it matter.

  “Funny thing about that.” The man behind Jenni sounded a little too amused. “I caught the lady in the men’s room defending your honor.”

  “Jenni, what the hell were you doing?” Jake took a second look at the guy and almost swallowed his tongue. “What the hell is he doing here?”

  And damn, the man was even sexier in person than in the photos.

  “Threatening to bust me.” Jenni looked around. “You know, I could really use a chair right now. My legs feel weak.”

  “Actually, I was on an assignment. The place is notorious for ‑‑ um, bathroom trysts. For narcotics, which is my department, and sex. Which, thank God, is not.” Luis gripped Jenni’s elbow. Jake was relieved to see he seemed to be trying to steady her, not cuff her. “Since she came in roaring that the answer is no, even though she did mention a threesome, I figured she probably wasn’t what I was trying to reel in.”

  “Damn, that’s a shitty assignment, Morales. In all kinds of ways.”

  “Tell me about it.”

  “But you’re right. Jenni doesn’t make a habit of hanging out in the men’s rooms. Especially gay men’s rooms. And you really don’t need another front page story in the papers. Right?” Jake gripped Jenni’s other elbow. Christ, he wasn’t going to let Jenni get thrown in jail today either. “I can take over from here, Morales. You can go back to hanging out by the toilets.”

  “I could definitely pass on another front page story. But I don’t get it. Jenni is usually a smart woman. I’d have said up until now she was careful, too. Careful is smart.”

  Jenni blinked at Morales like she’d never seen him before.

  “Oh no. Don’t tell me this,” she whispered. “Come to think of it, that sounds exactly like what a cop would say in an e-mail.”

  Luis smiled at her again. “I’m usually careful too. But some people don’t think I’m too smart. I take stupid risks every now and then.”

  “Jenni, do you want to stay or go? I’ll drive you back.” Jake gripped her harder. Then he half-smiled. Jenni was staring at Morales exactly the way Jake would if the guy had bothered to smile at him that way. “But I totally get why you’d stay.”

  Jenni felt a hot blush stinging up her face. “Uh, no. I think I’m dazed enough for one day. Morales ‑‑ Luis ‑‑”

  “Yeah?”

  Jenni rushed the words out. “I guess I’ll be seeing you. We can’t seem to prevent it. But preferably off duty next time. Besides, I…guess I promised to see you.”

  “Definitely off duty. And definitely seeing me.”

  Jenni looked at Jake. “Thanks, honey. Take me home. This has been wild. Maybe it was too much champagne.”

  * * * * *

  “Did you mean it?”

  “Mean what exactly? I’ve said a lot of stuff just now. I probably talked more in the past hour than I have all day. Maybe all week.”

  “You wouldn’t screw me?”

  “I said I wouldn’t screw you with Asshole Cole.”

  “But you would screw me?”

  “Ahhh, I hope you’re not looking for a demonstration right here and now. I think I said the possibility was there because I’m a guy and we tend to stick our peckers in first and think later.”

  “You wouldn’t screw me.”

  “Jenni, this is embarrassing.”

  “You wouldn’t stick your pecker in first and think later. You proved that today.”

  “You wanted to screw Asshole Cole?”

  “No! And I didn’t say that. It just… well, it’s just kind of confusing. I ne
ed to get this straight. I mean, I don’t think I ever thought of you that way. At least I didn’t know I did.”

  “Straight is not what you’ll get from me. Jenni, if we’re going to have some meaningful conversation where you get all pissed off at me, I’m going to stop the car and make you walk home right now.”

  Jenni patted his shoulder. “No, really, this totally throws me off. I always loved you and the other guys because you were safe. I thought. But maybe I really wanted you. Hmm. You know, if you guys had been interested in women, I probably would have slept with you a long time ago. No, I definitely would have.”

  “Jenni, I’m not liking this ‑‑ this ‑‑ it’s not a discussion because I’m not talking about this.”

  “But if I had, we probably wouldn’t have been friends for so long. Because, like I’ve said forever, sex screws everything up.”

  There was a long silence.

  “Jake, you’re chewing on your cheek trying not to talk.” Jenni giggled. “It’s all right, really. You know I love you. I know you love me.”

  “Almost home now,” Jake said in a brightly eager voice.

  “And we’re not screwing each other. Because if we did, it would end up meaning more than either of us want it to. And it would ruin a lovely friendship.”

  “Right. Whatever you say. Just another block. Of course if you do end up screwing Morales and ever feel a need to share, I’m first in line.”

  “Really?”

  Jake stopped in the middle of the apartment complex’s parking lot and stared at Jenni. “We are not having this discussion. Remember? In fact, it never happened.”

  “Totally understood.”

  “Are you going to screw Morales?”

  “Oh, now you want to get personal. None of your business…but, you know…since this has been a rather unusual evening, I’ll tell you I may have just that in my future.” Jenni looked down at her hands. “And look, I’m not scared. A gorgeous hunk like that and I’m not shaking.”

  “That’s good.”

  Jenni began to laugh. “I think it’s because Morales and I…we’re already hopelessly screwed up. I can’t think of anything we could do to make our nonrelationship any worse. If he’s going to put handcuffs on me, I want them to be purely for pleasure and not business.”

  Chapter Eight

  Sunday Night: Jenni’s Apartment

  “Oh my God.” Jenni shrank back behind the door. “I didn’t expect you.”

  He hadn’t called since Friday. He definitely hadn’t e-mailed. She was starting to think he’d totally written her off. She would have, if she’d been him.

  And now? She had on baggy gym shorts, a ratty T-shirt, and that was about it. And he looked like a…well, a model. Even with his clothes on.

  “It’s next week. And I didn’t want to wait any longer.” Luis Morales smiled, this time a guileless “aren’t we friends?” smile that she trusted even less than his shark smile when he was threatening to arrest her.

  I’m supposed to meet him in a busy place.

  Obviously he didn’t follow rules. And calling the police if things got ugly didn’t seem like such a good option.

  “Uh.” Jenni realized she had been totally lying to herself about not being nervous. “I didn’t tell you where I live.”

  “I took your police report, remember?” His smile faded. “Are you inviting me in? Are you coming out? Or is this as far as it goes? I’m not planning on crossing any lines you don’t want me to. I can forget your address, if that’s what you want.”

  “Uh.” Jenni tried to unstick her brain. Not out looking like this. Not staying in like this. But she definitely didn’t want to say this was as far as it went. She was supposed to look sexy and together for her meeting, damn it! That was from Dating 101 rules. “Come in with your eyes shut. You can open them when I tell you.”

  “Sounds interesting.” Obediently he shut his eyes and stepped forward.

  “Unfortunately, it’s not. I really was not prepared.” Jenni grabbed a few empty take-out cartons and tossed them behind the kitchen counter. The trash can was already full. “I need to change.”

  She cursed herself silently for leaving her apartment in its usual cluttered state. She always planned to work on her place when she had time, but she never did have time. And now Luis Morales was in the middle of her untidy floor.

  She scrambled for the bedroom, and as she leaped in, she remembered to say, “You can open your eyes now.”

  “Just a minute.” She remembered that hand on her shoulder from a few days ago. How did he get next to her so fast? “You aren’t going to change, are you?”

  “You peeked.”

  “Naw, I didn’t peek yet, honey, although I am getting hot. I really like what you’re wearing.”

  “I don’t have on any ‑‑” Jenni shut her mouth.

  He eyed her. “That’s what I like.”

  Jenni took a deep breath. “Let’s start all over again. This conversation is starting to make me very, very nervous. Would you like some coffee? Iced tea? Orange juice?”

  “Pick one for me. And I need to apologize. Showing up here like this was an impulse on my part. Obviously, a bad one.” He pulled a bouquet of flowers from behind his back. “I thought you’d like these. Listen, I can leave ‑‑”

  “Flowers? That’s so old school that I can’t remember when I last got any.” Jenni opened the covering to the package. “Tulips? How pretty! I did an article back in my fluff columnist days on the meaning of flowers and…”

  “I looked the article up. I think I’ve read all your stories. I do my research, Jenni, when I think it’s important.”

  He’d looked up her articles? Had he Googled her? Or ‑‑ God knows what he’d looked at. Cops had all kind of places they could search for info.

  “Tulips mean love and ‑‑ and passion.” Jenni looked up at him. “Luis, you’re scaring me. I should warn you when it comes to men, I scare easily.”

  Luis Morales looked serious. Then he moved closer. Very warm brown eyes looked into hers. “Remember they’re just flowers. Cheaper than roses but classier than mums.” He pulled her out of the bedroom. “Since I don’t think you want me to stay in here with you, let’s have a nice conversation in the living room.”

  I’m not sure I want a nice conversation not in the bedroom. Jenni mentally slapped herself on the hand and went to put the tulips in water.

  “I don’t own a vase, but this pitcher should work. Thank you. They’re so lovely.”

  And now she was babbling.

  “How about I pour some orange juice for us both? Maybe add some seltzer water for fizz?”

  “Thanks. You’re the guest, and I should be pouring for you. I don’t ‑‑ sorry, I don’t have any beer or anything alcoholic to offer you.”

  “It’s not a problem. I’d hate to spoil my clean cop image for you anyhow.”

  “I’m afraid I’ve done my research on you, too. Your clean cop image is a little distorted by the naked photos.”

  He tried not to wince. Of course he knew that she knew. Sometimes it seemed like everyone in the world had seen the photos. And while he’d thought he’d been anonymous at the time, it also seemed like most of southern Florida knew who he was, where he lived, and what he did for a living. He didn’t want to think how many contiguous states also had a pretty good idea.

  “That was a long time ago. I was eighteen and full of myself.” And angry and trying to stand on my own with nothing to back me up.

  The itch that had told him to head for her door the second he had a few days off had been wrong. This Jenni wasn’t the one he’d seen last, the one ready to take on anyone and anything. This Jenni would never get him or what he wanted.

  He should apologize again and leave.

  Except that this Jenni, all big eyes and uncertainty, was starting to pull on him just as hard as the tough, smart Jenni.

  Hard was the word. Shit, it hadn’t been an impulse. It had been a fucking need. He had been it
ching for Jenni for weeks now. Seeing her in that damned restaurant had only intensified his want. He’d beelined for her the minute he’d been allowed enough free time to make sure of her.

  She tucked her hair behind her ear and he saw her breasts move under the shirt.

  And who was he kidding? He wasn’t going to leave unless he absolutely had to. That meant he had to get her over what the photos had shown to the world. Then he had to work on whatever insecurities she had lingering.

  “When was that? Six or seven years ago?” Jenni didn’t leer at him. She didn’t look disgusted. She looked interested.

  “Closer to eight.”

  “You’re still younger than me.”

  “That’s good. You probably need a younger man. I have enough stamina to keep up with you.”

  Jenni laughed.

  Whew. She took that well, considering how jumpy she was. He could feel the nerves crawling all over her. Nerves and, please God, enough interest to keep her from running.

  A change of tactics was needed. He’d been thinking with his machismo. Apparently Jenni needed a little more subtlety.

  “Let’s go to the beach.” He set down his empty cup on the kitchen counter.

  “What? Why?” Jenni blinked at him and the change of subject.

  “You must have been born here. People in Ft. Lauderdale start taking it for granted and stop looking at the ocean. You’ve forgotten the beach, the waves, the breeze. It makes you feel good. Remember any of that? C’mon.” Luis jumped up.

  “You aren’t dressed for the beach.”

  “The beach won’t care. C’mon, girl.” He could talk better while he walked and didn’t focus on her.

  They shouldn’t stay someplace where they could fall into bed. He knew he could get them there if he pushed, but he didn’t think that would keep them in bed long enough to satisfy his itch. Not nearly long enough.

  Jenni pulled out a kitchen drawer and grabbed some keys. She fingered them as she stared him down. “We take my car. And I drive.”

  Luis opened the door for her. “Always thinking. You’re smart. I like that.”