Counting Stars

by Michele Paige Holmes

  Pete looked confused. “I thought women were supposed to like bad boys.”

  “Whatever gave you that idea?” Jane set Mark down again.

  Pete gave her a mischievous smile. “I’ve been doing some reading.”

  * * *

  Jane rubbed her hands up and down her arms, trying to rid herself of the goose bumps. Though her shirt was mostly dry now, the cool air of the monorail was giving her chills.

  Pete looked over, then scooted closer and put an arm around her, pulling her close.

  She was about to protest but decided his warm hand felt too good on her skin. “Thank you,” she said instead, closing her eyes and leaning her head back. The whole day had felt good—felt like things were back to where they used to be when Peter had announced he wanted to explore the whole couple idea. They were a good couple, Jane realized. She’d had a great time today with Mark and Madison and Peter. If only it could last.

  A week from today was the wedding. A week and a day after that, he would be gone.

  Deciding she didn’t want to waste another minute of the time they had together, Jane pushed the thought of friendship to the back of her mind and snuggled closer to Peter. She felt his arm tighten around her. Madison slept in her lap, and Peter held Mark, also asleep. If only they could stay here forever—together . . .

  “Westlake Center.” It seemed just a few minutes later that the announcement came over the speaker. Jane sat up straight, and Pete lifted his arm from around her. The monorail slowed, then came to a stop. Jane held the twins while he got the strollers ready. They left the car and walked out onto the fourth floor of the mall.

  “Hungry?” Pete asked.

  “Not really.” Jane looked around the food court. “Can you wait another half hour or so for the twins to wake up? We could get them some fries or something.”

  “Great idea. Let’s go shopping.” He set out, pushing Mark’s stroller, glancing behind to make sure Jane followed.

  “What are you looking for?” she asked, somewhat surprised at his enthusiasm. It had been her experience that most men—her brothers and brothers-in-law, anyway—didn’t particularly enjoy the mall.

  “Something,” Pete answered vaguely and continued walking. Rounding a corner, he slowed their pace, then finally stopped—in front of a jewelry store. He turned to her. “I don’t want to blow this like I did everything else, so I’m not going to say much, other than I want you to pick out whatever ring you like.”

  Jane looked from Pete to the store window beside her. Diamonds nestled on velvet, winking at her. In the chaos and upheaval of her life and emotions over the past week and a half, she hadn’t thought about a ring. A diamond was usually romantic—and given during the proposal. So what was appropriate for a marriage based on friendship and joint custody? A simple gold band, she quickly decided.

  Trying not to care too much that her hair was wild and curly from their water adventure, Jane walked past Peter into the jewelers. Slowly, she pushed the stroller along the glass cases, studying the contents. At the very end of the row, she came to one that contained plain, gold bands. Plain Jane. Plain band, she thought with a twinge of sadness as she forced her eyes away from the sparkling solitaire in the next case over. Lifting her hand, she pointed her unpolished nail at a pair of simple gold bands. “Something like that would be nice.”

  Peter leaned in for a closer look. “Are you sure?” He sounded disappointed.

  She nodded.

  Pete glanced at the price tags. “They’re not very much. Do you want to get some earrings or something to go with your dress, then?”

  The thought of her white suit and the gorgeous dress she’d left behind made the lump in her throat swell. She shook her head and looked away.

  Pete studied her a minute, then finally conceded. “All right. I’ll get someone to help us.”

  As if on cue, the two jewelers who’d been watching them since they entered the store swooped in for the sale. One was tall, blonde, and curvaceous, the other a Danny DeVito look-alike.

  “Can I help you?” they chorused.

  Pete looked at them both, then settled his gaze—wisely, Jane thought—on the short, bald salesman.

  “We’d like to look at these his and hers bands.”

  The man nodded, took his key out, and opened the case. Jane noticed that tall-blonde-and-curvy was still lingering, staring rather openly at Peter.

  “Renewing your vows?” she guessed, sidling closer.

  “Saying them for the first time,” Peter said, giving Jane a mischievous wink.

  “O—oh,” the saleswoman said, glancing at the twins.

  “It’s not what you think,” Pete assured her. “These are my brother’s kids—his and my fiancée’s.” He turned to Jane, giving her a poignant look. “My ex-fiancée’s.”

  At this, Danny DeVito looked up. “What size?” he asked, contemplating Jane.

  “I’m not really sure,” she said. How should she know? She didn’t own any rings. Jewelry generally got in the way when she was doing yard work. Though, she thought sadly with another glance at the solitaire, she wouldn’t have minded if a ring like that slowed her down a bit.

  “So, you’re helping out your sister-in-law to be,” nosy blonde said, obviously unable to contain her curiosity.

  Business must be slow, Jane thought.

  “Oh no.” Pete reached for Jane and pulled her to his hip. “Not my sister-in-law. She’s going to be my wife.”

  “I see,” the saleswoman murmured, though she clearly didn’t see as she kept looking from Jane to Peter to the twins, then back to Peter.

  Jane used her elbow to jab him in the side. Holding out her hand, she let the salesman slip a band on her ring finger. It was too big.

  “Are they twins?” the saleswoman asked, looking at Mark and Madison now.

  “Yes,” Pete said enthusiastically. “Isn’t it great? I’m a twin too. My brother and I, we shared everything.” He looked pointedly at Jane.

  “That’s right,” she said, not missing a beat. She smiled sweetly at the saleswoman whose mouth hung open, revealing several fillings in her back teeth.

  “Yep. Shared just about everything,” Peter repeated. Jane turned into his side to keep from laughing out loud.

  “Thanks a lot,” she muttered. She doubted they’d get any kind of a deal now—seeing how she was a woman living in sin and all.

  He gave her a quick squeeze that tickled, and Jane looked up. His eyes caught hers, and for a split second she thought she saw something more than laughter.

  On the other side of the counter, Danny DeVito cleared his throat. Pete took the gold band from him, took Jane’s hand, and slipped it on her finger. It fit perfectly.

  Jane held her hand out, admiring the band. Plain though it was, it was thrilling to be wearing a wedding ring.

  “Do you like it?” Pete asked quietly.

  She looked up at him, and a genuine smile lit her face. Warmth and contentment washed over her. In that moment, marrying a friend felt nearly perfect.

  “I do.”

  Chapter Sixty-Five

  Peter slipped into the pew beside Jane. She gave him a grateful smile before handing Mark over to her mother. The bishop rose to give the announcements, and Pete leaned back, draping his arm across the bench behind Jane. He’d agreed to attend church with her the next three Sundays until he left. He wasn’t certain what he’d do when he returned, but he could deal with that later. For now, he was making Jane happy and appeasing her parents.

  The opening song was announced. Jane reached for a book and opened it to hymn eighty-five, “How Firm a Foundation.” After glancing quickly over the words, Pete looked over at Jane’s father, but he was staring straight ahead, his eyes on the chorister at the front of the chapel.

  Sneaky, Pete thought, certain her father had requested this particular song. Raising his voice, Pete sang out loud and strong, not willing to let on that he suspected anything. The second verse began, and he found himself cau
ght off guard again. “In sickness, in health” certainly brought to mind his impending marriage.

  The third stanza stopped him cold.

  “At home or abroad, on the land or the sea—As thy days may demand.”

  A strange feeling came over him. He recognized it as the same he’d felt the first time he and Jane had taken the twins to the park. Someone was watching him. Watching out for you, an inner voice whispered. Unable to stop himself, Pete turned and looked behind him but only saw a family with several small children, each busy coloring and consuming Cheerios.

  He faced forward again, willing himself to pull it together for the last verse.

  “Fear not, I am with thee; oh, be not dismayed, For I am thy God and will still give thee aid.”

  “Thy God.” He thought of the unorthodox prayer he’d uttered a few nights earlier and told himself this couldn’t be the help he’d requested. It wasn’t an answer or a sign.

  As the hymn ended, Pete took the hymn book from Jane and snapped it shut, telling himself once more that the song, those words, were merely coincidence.

  Nothing more.

  * * *

  Loosening his tie, Pete walked across his room and sat down on the bed. When the knot was undone, he pulled the tie completely off, tossing it at the foot of the bed. He lay back, looking at the ceiling and thinking about the past three hours.

  Was church always so exhausting? Sacrament meeting alone had about done him in today, what with the songs—the closing hymn had been “Families Can Be Together Forever”—and speakers—a married couple who’d recently gone through the temple. Pete thought he’d done pretty good keeping his cool when the topic had been so obviously arranged for his benefit.

  He was all right, that is, until he’d looked over partway through the husband’s talk and seen a tear sliding down Jane’s cheek. From that point on things went downhill fast. Jane left hurriedly under the guise of changing a diaper, and then Madison, whom she’d left behind, really did have a messy diaper. Pete changed her in the too-small bathroom and then spent the next two hours chasing both twins up and down the hall—back and forth past the Seattle temple picture hanging on the wall. By the time church was over, he’d had a splitting headache, and he guessed Jane did too, if her red eyes were any indication.

  Remembering her wounded look, Pete raised his hands to his face, covering his own eyes. It didn’t help. He imagined he could still see the words from the hymns parading across the front of the temple while Jane stood beside it crying.

  It was no good, he realized. He was going to have to pray again to make certain what had happened in church was really just a coincidence. Reluctantly, Pete rolled to the floor, his forehead resting on the side of the bed. He folded his arms and waited, gathering courage to speak when he was so obviously alone.

  “Heavenly Father.” He’d say a real prayer this time—with the right words and everything, just like the Warners did. “I kneel before You, asking—begging—to know if You’re there. If Joseph Smith was a prophet. If the Book of Mormon is true. Can I really see Paul and my mom again? Jane believes I can—that You’re real, and it’s hurting her that I don’t feel the same. But I don’t.” He paused, listening. Waiting.

  Nothing.

  “I just don’t,” Pete said, hearing the anguish in his voice. “I don’t understand, but I really wish that I did.”

  Chapter Sixty-Six

  The ringing phone woke him from a fitful sleep. Pete glanced at the clock, and seeing it was only 6 a.m., had a moment of panic as he reached across the nightstand. Is something wrong with Mark? The caller ID showed an out-of-area number, and he gave a silent sigh of relief when he heard Shane’s voice.

  “How are you, man?” Shane asked, his loud voice carrying through the line as if he stood right beside Peter.

  “Great,” Peter said. “Except for the part where I have to report in two weeks.”

  “Yeah, I know,” Shane agreed grumpily. “So, how are those kids of yours? Do I dare ask how the custody thing is going?”

  Pete smiled, remembering how he’d spouted his frustrations to Shane, telling him he’d stop at nothing to get full custody of Paul’s children. “It’s going pretty good, actually. I’m marrying the co-guardian.”

  “You’re what?” Shane seemed to recover from his shock quickly. “That’s just great. Congratulations. I take it she’s a nice girl.”

  “She’s wonderful.” Pete paused, debating whether to tell Shane any more. After a few seconds’ hesitation, he decided it couldn’t possibly hurt. “She’s a member of your church.”

  “She’s LDS?” The incredulous tone was back in Shane’s voice.

  “Yeah,” Pete said. “Funny, isn’t it? I’ve even had the missionary lessons the past few months.”

  The other end of the line remained silent.

  “Shane, you still there?”

  “I am,” Shane said. His voice had gone from loud to quiet and thoughtful. “There’s really nothing funny about it, Peter. See, I’ve had this feeling—this prompting—for weeks now, that . . . that I should call you. I’m sorry I didn’t listen earlier.”

  “No worries,” Pete assured him. “We’ll see each other soon enough and can catch up then.”

  “That’s not what I mean,” Shane said. “I kept having this feeling I should call—and ask if you’d read the Book of Mormon I gave you.”

  Peter glanced at the book on his nightstand. “I have,” he said. “Thanks.”

  “What—what did you think about it?” Shane asked.

  “Well,” Peter sat up in bed and turned on the lamp. The strange sensation he’d felt at church was back again. This time he welcomed it.

  He took a deep breath. “Actually, I have a couple of questions.”

  Chapter Sixty-Seven

  “We’re kidnapping you, Aunt Jane,” Jessica announced as Jane opened her front door.

  “What?” Jane asked, glancing from Jessica to Caroline.

  “For your bridal shower,” Jessica continued. She held up a purple bandanna. “Now turn around so I can blindfold you.”

  “What’s this all about?” Jane asked, looking directly at Caroline this time.

  Caroline shrugged. “Jess is the boss. She put this whole thing together. You’ll have to ask her.”

  Jane looked down at her niece’s expectant face. “Let me call Peter,” she said. “Maybe he can stay with the twins.”

  “He’s having a bachelor party tonight, so the twins are coming with us.” Jessica pushed past Jane into the house. “Come on, Mom, and help me get them. We’ve got to get this party going.”

  Five minutes later, Jane, the purple bandanna tied over her eyes, sat in the back of Caroline’s minivan. Jessica chatted merrily on the drive to the unknown destination—what Jane quickly recognized, by the route they drove, as her parents’ house.

  Caroline parked the van, and clutching Jessica’s arm, Jane climbed out. Not wanting to spoil the fun for Jessica, she didn’t let on that she knew where they were.

  The front screen opened, followed by the door, and Jane let Jessica lead her through the house to the backyard. There, Jess pulled out a chair for her and helped her sit down.

  “Now stay put, but don’t take your blindfold off yet. We’ll be ready to start in a few minutes.”

  Jane sat quietly as Jessica walked off.

  “Is this the part where everyone jumps out and yells surprise?”

  Jane was surprised and nearly did jump at the sound of Pete’s voice, mere inches from her.

  “What are you doing here?” She reached up to lift a corner of the bandanna.

  “Ah-ah.” Pete said, putting a hand on hers to stop her. “No peeking.”

  “Then how come you get to look? And I thought you were supposed to be at some sort of bachelor party.”

  “I think it’s an all-in-one deal,” Pete said.

  “Or, knowing my parents, more likely it’s a plot to make sure neither of us skips town before tomorrow.”
<
br />   “No second thoughts on my part,” Pete said. “How about you?”

  Jane shook her head. “No.” She’d hardly seen Pete all week as he was busy wrapping things up his last few days of work. Every night she poured out her heart in prayer, asking for confirmation she was doing the right thing. And, strangely, every night that confirmation came. She was going through with this marriage. She loved Peter for who he was, and she’d have faith that someday he would be hers forever.

  “Here comes Jessica—she says you can take off the blindfold now.” He reached behind Jane to untie it. She opened her eyes, blinking several times to adjust to the lights blaring from the patio.

  “Ladies and gentlemen,” Jessica began, speaking into her karaoke microphone. “We are pleased to gather this evening to celebrate the impending marriage of Aunt Jane and Uncle Peter!” She began to clap and others joined in. Jane looked around the yard and saw her whole family in attendance. Everyone sat at small, round, red-and-white covered tables. A single taper candle flickered in the center of each table. Jane recognized the mints—probably leftover from Jessica’s party—sprinkled around the candles, and each table held a disposable camera and a small, dollar-store container of bubbles.

  Overwhelmed, Jane looked again at her twelve-year-old niece, who was explaining the program for the evening. Dinner would be buffet-style, served by the other cousins, at the long table by the side gate. After dinner, there would be the opening of presents. Shocked, Jane glanced at the patio table covered in pink- and red-wrapped gifts.

  “And finally, after the gifts have been presented, we have some very special entertainment planned.” Jessica giggled and looked over at the television set up beside the karaoke machine.

  “Oh no,” Jane whispered. “Please tell me Caroline isn’t planning another Cher concert.”

  Pete grinned as he rose from the table. “I don’t think so.” He placed a hand on the back of Jane’s chair. “The bride is supposed to be served first, so let’s go eat.”