A CHRISTMAS COLLECTION

by Wilton, Patrice

  “And then what? Wave me good-bye? Is that what you want?” She waited, hoping for a denial, giving him a chance to tell her what was really in his heart.

  The moment went on too long, and Ally’s hope died.

  Her father stepped up. “We’re getting ready for some dinner. You joining us, Chief Brown?”

  Ian looked at Ally’s face, and he must have seen her doubt. She was shaking her head at her mother and had moved away from him, but he clapped her father on the shoulder, and said, “Love to. If you’ll let me suggest a place, I know a very good Italian restaurant you might enjoy.”

  Her eyes bored into him. What nerve! Sure he’d like to sleep with her again. Why not? He was a man, and she was one of the few available women in town. He could have his way with her and then escort her out of town. Easily had, easily forgotten.

  Right!

  She lifted her chin. No way in hell would he get a second chance in her bed. That train had left the station. Now that she knew how things stood, all she had to do was get rid of him.

  “Ian, sorry, but I’d planned to take them to Nick’s.”

  “There’s plenty of opportunity to do that. This place is a little out of the way but worth the short trip.”

  “Where?” she asked suspiciously. “The only Italian restaurant I know is the pizza place. They have a couple of tables and a limited menu, but it’s not fancy.”

  “Obviously you haven’t been to Trevini’s. But I’m not surprised because you work every night.” He glanced at her parents, as if looking for support. “Nick’s is good, but it’s not the only game in town.”

  “Hmmm.” The thought of a new restaurant, and a few hours in Ian’s company—as heartless as he was—tempted her. Still she resisted. “Maybe another time. I had my heart set on Nick’s rack of lamb.”

  “Wait ’til you taste the pasta bolognaise, the sauce is sweet and done just right. All their pasta dishes are delicious, but they also have excellent veal, prime rib, and some nights lamb is on their menu as well.”

  “That does sound good,” Ken said. “What do you say, Ally?”

  She knew she should cave, but she’d given into this man long enough. He’d entered her body and entered her heart. And now was pushing her free.

  “What’s the matter, Ally?” her mother asked. “Don’t you want Ian to join us?”

  “It’s not that,” she said quickly, not wanting anyone to guess how much she did want him. Joining them. Joining her. For good. “It’s just that I’ve never even heard of it. Is it new?”

  “Been here longer than me,” Ian told her. “It used to be my favorite spot, but something caught my eye at Nick’s, and I started hanging out there.”

  Her heart skipped at the words, and the meaning was clear. Had he had a change of heart? Did he want her to stay after all?

  Her mother linked an arm through hers. “This place sounds very nice. Can we walk or should we grab a cab?”

  “No cabs in Heaven,” he said. “But we could take the horse and buggy. It’s on the other side of the park.”

  “Oh, we were there yesterday, watching the skaters. We took the carriage ride back to the hotel. This sounds lovely, and so romantic.” She glanced at her husband. “Ken, can you flag it down? Or whatever you do for buggies?”

  Ian whistled with two fingers in his mouth, and the driver tilted his top hat, clicked the reins and the old gray horse stepped out of the line. “That’s the New York way of doing it. Works here too.”

  Her parents got into the carriage first and sat with their backs to the driver, and Ian and Ally sat across from them. The snow was no longer falling and the air was chilly.

  “Where to, folks?” The driver handed them each a blanket to ward off the cold.

  “Trevini’s,” Ian called, placing the blanket around Ally’s shoulders and taking her hand in his.

  She knew she shouldn’t, but his knee was pressed against hers and the warmth of his body was too hard to resist. She snuggled up beside him, wishing that tonight could be a prologue for things to come—that Ian would realize she belonged here. With him.

  The restaurant was small, with only twenty tables, but it was a wonderful surprise. A quaint stone building that was very old and very beautiful, with a huge fireplace, rafter ceilings, and a violinist who made his way through the tables.

  “This is lovely,” Marie said, sending Ally a significant look.

  “It is,” she told Ian with a warm smile. “If I’d known we were coming here, I’d have dressed up.” She thought about the new black dress she’s bought and how much she’d have loved Ian to see her in it. And out of it.

  He helped her off with her coat and she was grateful she’d worn her new designer jeans and cashmere sweater. “I like the pink sweater,” he said, his hands on her shoulders.

  She leaned back into him, wanting to enjoy the night, and whatever time they had left together. She had learned the importance in the past few years to seize the moment, and that’s just what she intended to do.

  The maitre d’ led them to a table, and she was surprised to see that it was the only one left. She turned to look at Ian. “We got lucky. Last table.”

  “I booked it. Just in case.”

  Her mouth fell open, then slammed shut. She sat down, her insides jumping, her mind in a whirl. Had this all been staged in advance? But how could he have known they’d be at the concert? And what would he have done had they not? Eaten here alone or found another companion?

  Her mother sat on one side of her, Ian on the other. She unfolded her napkin in her lap and glanced at Ian. “Oh, I’m so pleased we met with you tonight,” she told him, with a happy smile. “This is perfectly charming. Imagine Ally not even knowing it was here.”

  “I don’t go out a lot, Mom. I work every night but Sunday and when I have an evening off the last thing I want to do is go into town or have a meal out.”

  “That’s understandable,” her father said. “Ian called the hotel earlier today and I told him our plans, but I didn’t expect that he’d arrange this.”

  “So that’s how it happened.” Ally flashed both men a knowing look. “You were in cahoots together. Nice. I like that.” What else had they talked about?

  Ian moved his foot next to hers and she felt a tingle of hope.

  The waiter came over and the men conferred about wine while she pretended to study the menu. She snuck peeks at Ian, wishing they were alone. She had so many questions to ask, intimate questions that required privacy.

  “So what do you see?” Ian asked, smiling at her.

  “Everything looks good.” Especially him. She longed to reach out and take his hand. Kiss his mouth. Demand to know if he’d had a change of heart. Did he want her in his life after all? If he didn’t, why had he gone to all the trouble of arranging this?

  She knew it was too soon for him to give an honest answer. They’d been together for only a week. Slept together a few times. But if there was even a hint of a chance, it would help with her decision. A life with Ian. Remaining in Heaven. It wasn’t just the easy way out. It was what her heart wanted. But he needed to want it too.

  Marie put down her menu. “I’ve decided on the shrimp scampi. It’s always been one of my favorite dishes. And a Caesar salad to start.”

  “I may try the veal marsala. Good choice?” Ally asked Ian.

  “Excellent.” He pressed his knee to hers and she felt a butterfly kick in the pit of her stomach. Damn, but she wanted him. But how could she? Her parents were staying in the room next to hers, so head-banging sex was out of the question. Unless she snuck out of the hotel and met him at his apartment.

  The waiter returned for their orders. The men were both having linguini bolognaise and the women repeated their selections. The wine arrived and was poured into elegant balloon-shaped glasses. They toasted each other and as Ally looked at all their loved faces her emotions threatened to overcome her.

  A few days ago she’d faced death. Tonight, her life was near perfect
.

  The violinist came to their table and asked if they had a request.

  “O Sole Mio?” Ian asked.

  From the first chord, the beautiful heartbreaking music brought tears to her eyes and threatened to rip her apart. “It’s so beautiful.” She glanced at Ian, misty-eyed. “Please tell him to stop.”

  Her mother looked at her. “Are you okay, dear?”

  “It’s just so much. Everything. Having you all here. I’m sorry.” She sniffed, her heart full. “I’m on emotional overload.”

  Her father gave the violinist a large tip and waved him away. “It’s expected, hon. Don’t be embarrassed. Everyone here understands that you’ve been through a traumatic ordeal.”

  She kept her eyes down, and Ian took her hand, gently caressing her fingers. “You don’t need to apologize. It’s fine.”

  “Is it?” She reached for her glass of wine and gulped. Did he care? If she stayed, could she convince him to love her as she did him?

  “What’s going on?” he asked. He studied her, searching her expression for any clues to her thoughts.

  “Nothing.” Chaos. She wished him luck figuring it all out. “Everything. I just don’t know myself anymore.” She put her wineglass down. “I had my life together, and now it’s in pieces.”

  “Ally, please don’t get upset.” Her mother touched her arm. “You don’t have to figure it all out right now. Take your time. The answer will come to you.”

  She was saved from speaking as the waiter returned with their food. She picked through her dinner, and saw all the concerned faces watching her. She knew her mood had spoiled this wonderful surprise, and she was sorry for it—which only made the tears simmer beneath the surface of her forced smile.

  When her mother left the table to go to the ladies room, Ally couldn’t contain herself a moment longer. She glanced at Ian, demanding an answer. “Tonight? What was this all about? Do you want me to stay?”

  As soon as the words left her mouth, she realized they were a mistake. Ian’s ears turned red and he fiddled with the collar of his shirt. He glanced at her, then her father, not knowing how to respond.

  “I want you to do what will make you happy,” he finally said. “You’re young and bright, and have a big future ahead of you.”

  “Of course I do.” Her chest squeezed tight, feeling as if it might choke her. She moved her foot, and shifted her seat in the chair, trying to put some distance between them. She wanted to run, far, far, away.

  His father looked from one to the other. “Is something going on between you that we should know about?”

  “No, Dad. We’re just friends.” She swallowed hard, and when Ian didn’t deny it the joy seeped out of her. “That’s all.”

  Her dad frowned but didn’t press.

  She was silent during the long carriage ride back, and she feigned sleep. When they got to the hotel, she hopped off first, and helped her mother and father down. “Thanks so much, Ian. It was a great night,” she said with a false and hearty smile. “Quite the surprise.”

  He nodded, his eyes deep with concern. “I’ll see you at the Christmas party.”

  “You’re going?” she asked. “Don’t you have to work? Who’ll be manning the station?”

  “Ally!” her mother said, giving her a warning look.

  “It’s all right, Marie.” Ian chuckled. “She still finds it hard to believe that we live in a crime free town.” He glanced down at her. “Stuart will cover the late afternoon and evening shift. I’ll be on duty in the morning.”

  “Right. He has family, you don’t.”

  He flinched, and immediately she wished the words back. It had been inexcusably rude, and he deserved better. It had come from a place of hurt, but that was her fault, not his. She had welcomed him into her bed, her heart. He hadn’t wanted any of it to happen and had made that abundantly clear. This had been her mistake—and only hers.

  “I’m so sorry.” She tried to make a feeble joke. “It’s me. Not you.”

  “You all have a good night, now.” He jumped down from the carriage, paid the driver and strode off, probably back to the police station and his car.

  Her father looked at her, his kind face troubled. “What is going on with you two?”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  Ian’s head was pounding and he was angry. Rightfully so. What the hell was it about women? They could change on a dime. Go from hot to cold faster than a two-minute shower.

  He’d thought the night was going great. The restaurant was a big hit, her family seemed to like him and everyone was having a good time until he’d requested that damn song. Then Ally had some kind of melt-down.

  No wonder he was divorced. He’d never understood his wife’s mood swings, any more than he understood Ally now. What did she want from him?

  Damn it to hell! He never should have slept with her. Any woman worth her salt couldn’t just jump into bed with a guy and not let her emotions get involved. Was that it then? Had she hoped that they could become an item? Did she want to be the second Mrs. Brown?

  The air around him dropped several degrees as realization slapped him in the face. Heck, he thought she’d jump at the first chance to leave this small town and go back to where she came from, and do what all young women do. Date. Go to clubs. Live a little. The girl was only twenty-six.

  All those years when she should have been kicking up her heels, getting laid, having her heart broken and breaking some back, she’d been alone, unable to connect with her family, her friends. Living in fear. Afraid to trust, or to let anyone get close.

  And then he’d come along. Ian cringed, remembering it clearly and in a new light. He’d forced himself on her. Not physically, but he’d invaded her protective space. Refusing to leave her alone. Sleeping in her cabin. Watching over her.

  He’d slipped past her guard and her barricade tumbled down. The love-making? Yes, she’d wanted it, but he was the mature adult, the officer of the law, the one in charge. He’d not only allowed it, he’d wanted it so bad it hurt.

  He was to blame for the fiasco that had led up to tonight’s events. She might even think she was in love with him. His steps slowed. How would she know the difference—she’d never had the opportunity to know romantic love. Never had a man hold her, caress her, look at her with a heart filled with love.

  The reality of that cut though him. She may have confused his affection and tenderness for the kind she deserved. No wonder she looked at him with accusing eyes, and anger simmering inside.

  He had betrayed her. Had failed her. Had used her and turned away.

  It wasn’t as if he didn’t care. He did, very much in fact. He also knew that he’d miss her badly when she left. But not for one moment did he think she should stay. Unless she wanted to, of course. Whatever Ally wanted, she should have. Hell, she’d earned that right a dozen times over.

  When he arrived back at the police station he popped his head in and found Stuart snoozing. He left him that way, grabbed his keys and closed the door silently behind him. He drove home, without any idea of how to fix the situation. He was an honorable man, accountable for his actions, and if sleeping with her had given her fanciful ideas then somehow he had to make it right.

  * * *

  Christmas morning, Ally woke early. There was no Santa Claus sneaking down the chimney, but when she opened her curtains she noticed the branches of trees bowing with the weight of the new soft snow. It was a winter wonderland outside and a day to give joy and thanks. She could hear church bells ringing, and for the first time in forever she wanted to go to mass.

  It was only seven thirty, but she dialed her parent’s number and heard the phone ringing next door. “Mom? It’s me. Do you hear the church bells? I want to go. Will you come with me?”

  She heard her mother confer with her dad. “Yes,” she answered. “We’ll be ready in half an hour. It’s a wonderful idea.”

  Ally showered and dressed in a red wool dress that her mother had bought for her when they
’d been out shopping. She put on black stockings and new black boots, then stepped back to admire her reflection in the mirror. She looked different. Almost citified.

  She had made a decision last night and told her parents over dinner. To be fair to Nick, she’d work until New Years, and then she would return to Connecticut. She could never go back to the cabin on the lake and had let the realtor know that she wouldn’t be signing a new lease. Her future was still in limbo, but she needed to see her old friends again and let them know why she’d disappeared without a word. And to confront the old familiar territory and let go of the past.

  Only then could she face her future and whatever it held.

  Today was kind of a rebirth—a new beginning where anything was possible. And she wanted to go to church and give her thanks.

  The chapel was filled to overcrowding, but they had another service beginning in an hour. Ally and her parents went to a coffee shop down the street and ordered a light breakfast. When they returned the organ music was playing, the pews half empty. They had their choice of seats and sat in the first row.

  She sat between her parents and held both their hands. Again she had to fight back her emotions, letting the music wash over her and the healing power creep into her soul. It was a beautiful service and on leaving they stayed and greeted several people that Ally had come to know.

  Word had gotten around about her ordeal and she dodged the curious questions as best she could. She moved quickly through the congregation, keeping a pleasant smile on her face and a tight rein on her emotions.

  Outside, she turned to her parents and released a huge sigh of relief. “I enjoyed the service, but not the sympathy and questions. I hate rehashing what happened. People don’t understand.”

  “You did fine,” her mother said. “And time heals all wounds.”

  “Yada, yada, yada,” she answered with a saucy grin, feeling more like herself. “So what shall we do before the party begins?”

  “Let’s get dressed in warm clothes and go for a walk in the park,” her father surprised her by saying. “I expect we’ll be doing a lot of heavy eating and drinking today, and I want to enjoy myself without guilt.”