Before the Cherry Trees

by H. D'Agostino

“Call your dad,” I tried again. “We’re gonna be here all night.”

  “Shar,” he warned as he leaned back down. “I can fix this.”

  We were there another hour before he finally gave up and called his parents, and he was right. When his dad pulled up in the pickup truck with a chain and some flashing lights, he shook his head at us.

  We didn’t sneak out there anymore, and six months later I found out I was pregnant with Ken. Trevor was having that talk with him tonight. I was not going to be that parent. Trevor and I have known each other since we were kids, getting married was inevitable, but not at eighteen. I’ve been happy, but every once in a while, I wonder what my life would have been like if I’d waited to start a family. Kenneth and Michael have been my life, and now this little one would be too, but what if we had waited and she had been first? Would I have gone away to school? Would I be this happy, or desperate to have this baby? Would Trevor have followed his dreams and left behind the small town of Cherryville, or would we be right here doing this exact same thing? I wanted more for my kids, and Ken had a future in baseball. I didn’t want him giving that up for a girl.

  “HONEY, I’M HOME,” I called out as I pulled my snow hat from my head. I ran my hands through my messy hair before shrugging out of my coat. It was getting bad out, and I knew if the weather kept this up I’d probably be going back out to help some idiot who thought they could manage. Whenever snow hit the area, we always had a few people who thought they could drive in it and then your average teen who didn’t listen to their parents.

  “In here,” Sharron called back. I smiled as I stepped out of my boots and navigated the wet floor on my way to the kitchen. I couldn’t help but stop and stare when I rounded the corner. There she was, my wife, standing in front of the stove stirring something. Her hair was pinned up with a few loose curls falling around her neck, a red apron tied around her waist, and a pair of fuzzy slippers on her feet. She was humming as she moved gracefully in front of the stove. She was beautiful, and she was mine.

  “Whatcha fixin’?” I moved to stand behind her, wrapping my arms around her waist. I rested my chin on her shoulder before pressing a kiss to her neck.

  “Chicken soup. I thought if you had to leave, you could take some in a Thermos. It’ll keep warm that way, and you still get to eat,” she smiled as she glanced at me from the corner of her eye.

  “Smells really good. How did it go today,” I pulled back and stepped up beside her, turning so I was leaning against the counter and facing her.

  “September fifteenth,” she grinned. I go back next week for my first checkup,” she scooped up a small amount of soup in the ladle she was holding and lifted it in front of her mouth. After blowing on it lightly, she held it in front of my mouth. “What do you think?”

  I sipped lightly and groaned. It tasted so good. One thing my wife had on most of the town was her ability to cook. I don’t know where she got it from, but she could whip up some dishes that were literally to die for. “Mmm. When’s it gonna be ready?”

  “Five more minutes?” she smiled at me as she went back to stirring. When I started to push off the counter, she reached out and stopped me. “You need to talk to Ken,” she sighed. “He and Beth are getting really close.”

  “Ok,” I shrugged. I wasn’t sure what exactly she expected me to do. I mean, he’s a sixteen-year-old boy. He’s known where babies come from for a couple of years. I’m sure he’s already doing stuff that we don’t know about. I’d already touched a girl when I was his age. Sharron and I were sleeping together at seventeen.

  “I don’t want to be a grandma,” she turned, placing her hands on her hips as she glared at me.

  ‘Here we go,’ I thought. Pregnancy hormones and all the mood swings. I put my hands up in front of me and shook them as I tried to calm her. “I’ll talk to him, but if they’re already doing it, there really isn’t a point.”

  “They’re not,” Mikey came bounding into the room, grabbed a carrot off the counter and popped it in his mouth. “I’m hungry, Mom,” he munched as he scurried over to the refrigerator.

  “Where’s your brother?” I grumbled as I gave a pointed look to Sharron.

  “Kissing Beth on the porch while they wait for her mom. I was watching, but yuck!” he made a gagging motion. “Why would you ever want to kiss a girl like that?” he shook his head as he shuddered.

  “I’ll talk to him tonight,” I copied Mikey as I too grabbed a carrot, “and you leave your brother alone. When you meet a girl, you’re not going to want him spying on you.”

  “Yes Sir,” Mikey’s head dropped as he rushed out of the room.

  DINNER WENT OFF without any interruptions, and I almost thought I might make it through the night without having to go out. No such luck, though. The calls always seem to come in the middle of the night when the weather was crappy.

  I’d just fallen into a deep sleep when my phone starting buzzing. It took me a few minutes to wake up, and realize what it was. I slapped blindly at the nightstand until my fingers wrapped around the hard plastic. “Lo,” I yawned as I blinked up at the ceiling. Sharron was snuggled into my side, her head resting on my chest with one leg slung across my hips with her hand resting on my chest. She nuzzled closer, but her eyes didn’t open.

  “We got a truck sideways off Route 13. Driver’s pinned in, Boss,” Steve, one of my deputies rattled off on the other end of the line.

  “Where?” I sighed as I rubbed at my eyes with my other hand.

  “Down near the Callahan place,” he sounded out of breath, and I wondered what exactly he’d been doing.

  “On my way,” I groaned just as the words clicked together. The Callahan place, truck, sideways, snow. I didn’t know who it was, but all those clues led me to believe it could be Mia’s dad. I placed my phone back on the nightstand as I worked to maneuver my way out from under Sharron. I didn’t want to wake her, and we’d just fallen asleep less than two hours ago.

  “Where are you going,” her voice was soft as I rolled to slide out of bed.

  “Accident. Go back to sleep. I’ll be back as soon as I can,” I leaned over and pressed a kiss to her temple as she snuggled under the covers. It was moments like these that I hated my job. I loved it most of the time, but when I had to leave a warm bed with my wife to go stand out in the cold, I hated it.

  I quickly dressed in some warm clothes before grabbing my Sherriff’s coat and tugging a hat on my head. I rushed out to my truck, tossed some chains and shovels in the back, grabbed my emergency kit, and then climbed in. While I was waiting for it to warm up, I flicked on my radio and scanner to get more details about where I was going.

  Route 13 was out in the country and only a few people lived out that way. Mia, Ty’s finance’s parents and one other family, The Greenwoods. It was mostly woods and cattle land. As I drove along, the snow was coming down hard. It was almost impossible to see and I wondered who in their right mind would be out in this. Visibility sucked and the roads were really slick. I turned my lights on to avoid stopping for fear I might not get started again as I ambled through town and made my way to the outskirts.

  As I approached the Callahan place, I saw it. There off the right shoulder was a pickup truck practically sideways in the ditch. There were swerve marks in the snow where it had slid when the driver attempted to correct the skid. Ruts and mounds of snow piled around it from all the attempts to right the vehicle. A few feet in front were two police cars belonging to two of my deputies. One was placing flares and caution signs while the other was attempting to pry open the door on the truck.

  “He’s stuck good, man,” Steve shouted over the revving truck engine as he gave up his attempts and climbed up the bank toward me. Upon closer inspection, I saw it was Mr. Callahan’s truck. “It’s Daniel. I think he was late for curfew,” Steve rolled his eyes. “I’m half tempted to leave him in there. He ain’t hurt,” he pointed over his shoulder with his thumb.

  I shook my head. “When will they learn? Di
d you call Mike? I don’t think my truck can pull him out from that angle.”

  “He’s on his way. Had to wake him up too,” Steve shook his head and chuckled.

  “Nice,” I nodded before climbing through the snow and down next the the window of the truck. I knocked, and shone my flashlight inside. Daniel was still buckled in and he looked up at me, panicked. “You ok?”

  He reached over and used the hand crank to lower the window a little, “Yeah. Can you not tell my dad?”

  “I think we’re a little past that, Son,” I laughed.

  “They’re out of town this week. I was taking a date home. I didn’t think it was that bad,” he rambled.

  “They cancelled after school activities today. Did you not think there was a reason for that?” I shook my head at him as I scowled. Daniel was only a year older than Ken. I knew that if he’d pulled a stunt like this I’d be worried sick. “You’re a minor. I have to tell your folks.”

  “I know,” he slumped into the seat farther. “When can you get me out?”

  “Soon as Mike gets here with his truck. You realize your daddy is gonna make you pay the expenses here, right? Mike’s fees ain’t cheap and you’re getting him out of bed,” I laughed at the whole situation. The truth was, I’d done stupid shit like this when I was in high school with Sharron. I remember many nights of rushing home after dropping her off because I stayed too long kissing her on the porch. My dad had made me clean up any of the messes I’d created; as much as I hated it back then, I respected him for it now.

  “I know,” Daniel grumbled just as a set of yellow and orange lights lit up the area. “Finally,” he glanced behind him with a sigh of relief.

  It took Mike a little over twenty minutes to pull Daniel out. The truck started right up, and after a warning from me, he slowly made his way home. I groaned as I stretched, before thanking Steve and heading back to my warm bed. I had a few hours before I had to be up for the day, and I intended on sleeping for as many of them as I could.

  THE DRIVE HOME was slow going and when I pulled up to the house, I took note that the driveway was going to need to be blown out. I grumbled as I trudged up the steps, making a mental note that Ken and I would have our talk when I woke him to help me. He was old enough to do the mornings now and with a new baby on the way, he was going to have to take on more. In the previous years I always cleaned off all the snow in the morning before my shift. Sharron and the kids would take over the afternoon shift. She wasn’t going to be able to do that this year. Ken was going to have to step up.

  The house was still dark when I crept through the door. It was a few hours before daybreak and every part of me was exhausted. I stepped out of my boots, hung up my coat, and wandered down the hallway to my room. When I pushed open the door, Sharron was sprawled in the center of the bed. I peeled off my clothes, tossing them behind me as I approached her. I stood there for a moment only in my boxer briefs as I tried to figure out how I was going to move her over to get in. She yawned and rolled to the side as she murmured, “Everything ok? I heard you pull in.”

  “Everything’s fine,” I whispered as I lifted the covers and snuggled up next to her. She rolled back toward me and burrowed into my chest before kissing my jaw.

  “You’re cold,” she shivered as her warm skin pressed against me.

  “Mmm hmm,” I yawned again as I wrapped my arms around her. “You two can warm me up,” I mumbled as I drifted off into a peaceful sleep. All was right in our world, at least for the moment.

  IT’S AMAZING HOW a single moment can define your future. One little second or a series of them pulls you into a reality that you didn’t think was possible. You close your eyes and when you open them, your entire world is forever changed.

  It was early February, the tenth to be exact. Winter was in full swing, and Ken had been preparing for baseball season. Trevor had been more attentive, and was supposed to come with me for my next OB appointment. The baby was now thirteen weeks, and we were going to hear its heartbeat for the first time. When I went last month, the nurse tried, but we couldn’t get a good read. Now, I was far enough along that they could listen from my stomach.

  Excited didn’t even touch what I was feeling. I spent the days before looking for anything to keep busy. I cleaned our house from top to bottom, and when I finished I went to bug Morgan. She kept me busy, and as the day for my exam moved closer, so did Ken’s birthday. He was turning seventeen and despite demanding that I not throw a party, I was in planning mode. I knew that soon enough he would be gone to college, and I wanted to grasp these moments as much as I could. He was still my little boy, and I couldn’t help but grin as I searched cake ideas on Pinterest.

  When I climbed into bed that night, everything was right for the moment. When it happened, I didn’t even know what it was. I awoke with a pain in my side. At first I assumed it was from the position I was laying in. With Mikey’s pregnancy, I always had to be on my side. This baby seemed to like that too. I slowly sat up holding onto my stomach as I shuffled to the bathroom. The pain was a mix of needing to go, and a muscle pull. When I came back to bed, I curled into Trevor and fought to go back to sleep. After an hour or so, the pain subsided, and I fell back to sleep.

  When I woke up the next morning, everything was fine. I felt fine, and my day went as planned. I mentioned to Trevor that I’d had a stomach ache the night before, but since I felt better and had an appointment the next day, he didn’t think I should worry. I told him I was going to mention it to my doctor and see what he said.

  I WAS SMILING when I stepped over the threshold of Dr. Andrews’ office. A gas fireplace in one corner was roaring, and there was a little bounce in my step over what the day meant. Gina, one of the nurses, waved at me as I settled into a chair. I was in such a good mood, that the fact that I was alone at the appointment didn’t even phase me. Trevor had called from his office that morning saying he wasn’t able to get away. I could tell he felt terrible about it, but I understood. I’d done this before, so I knew what to expect. It should have been routine.

  When I was called back to the exam room, I was all smiles. I quickly changed into a gown, and settled myself on the table. I fidgeted as I waited, but the wait wasn’t long. Dr. Andrews breezed in with my file and his clipboard. He settled himself on the stool near my knees and smiled as he folded his hands together.

  “How are you feeling?” his head tipped to the side as he appraised me.

  “Great, actually. Hardly any morning sickness at all,” I shrugged as my legs swung in front of me. Dr. Andrews wrote a few things in my chart before he looked back up. “I did want to ask you. A few nights ago I had some cramps. No bleeding or anything and they went away, but it was odd. I never had these with my other pregnancies.”

  “How long did they last?” his brow furrowed.

  “About an hour,” I lifted one shoulder as I started looking around the room. Something was off, but I didn’t know what. I could feel it in the air. He was hiding something from me.

  “I know you came for a checkup, but I’d like to do an ultrasound today. We’ll make sure everything is ok, and we can hear the heart that way too,” he smiled softly as he patted my knee. “Gina will be back in a few minutes to get you set up in that room.”

  “Ok,” I nodded as he slipped out the door. My heart rate spiked with nervous excitement as I waited. Not only was I going to hear my baby’s heartbeat, but now I was going to get to see her too.

  It only took a few minutes to get settled in the room down the hall before Dr. Andrews was back. The room was dimly lit with only the monitor from the ultrasound machine and a few dimmed overhead lights. I settled back on the table as Dr. Andrews powered up the machine.

  “Will have to do this as a transvaginal ultrasound since you’re so early. The baby’s too small to see from the outside,” he clicked a few buttons. “Ready?”

  I nodded and when the wand pushed into me I couldn’t help but jump a little. It was cold, and I was nervous. Dr. Andrews
twisted the wand in different directions as he made clicking noises on the screen. It didn’t even dawn on me that there was no sound.

  “Can you see it?” I smiled. “Can you see my baby?” I craned my neck as I struggled to lift my head and see around the way the screen was turned.

  “Yes,” he answered solemnly. He turned the screen so I could see what he was looking at. “I’m sorry,” he sighed. “There’s no heartbeat.”

  “What?” I mumbled. I didn’t understand what he was saying. I did, but I knew they couldn’t be right. I was hearing him wrong.

  “This is the egg sack,” he pointed to a giant bubble on the screen. “This is the embryo. It’s not growing. I’m sorry.”

  “So the other night. The pain…” I trailed off as shock settled over me. I couldn’t react yet. I was still processing the news.

  “You were miscarrying, Sharron,” he pulled the wand from inside me and turned the monitor off.

  “But I didn’t bleed any,” I muttered.

  “Sometimes the body doesn’t get rid of everything when it should. Your system should start purging itself in the next few days. If it doesn’t, call me and we’ll set up a D and C. I’m sorry,” with that, he turned and left the room.

  I stood and shuffled back to where I’d left my clothes and numbly dressed. Shock settled over every part of me. I went through the motions, but suddenly all I wanted to do was escape. The pictures of babies on the walls made me angry, and when I breezed through the waiting room all the things that had me smiling minutes before made me want to scream. Women with round bellies that had no idea what just happened to me stared back as I signed out and rushed to my car. I needed to get away. I knew I’d lose it soon, and I didn’t want to be there when it happened.

  As I started my car, I dialed the only person who I thought would understand… my husband. “Hello?” Trevor’s voice was cheerful on the other end. I sniffed as tried to hold back the tears. I probably shouldn’t have been driving, but I wanted to get home. “Hello? Shar?” he sounded worried. “What’s wrong? Are you ok?”