Hot-Shot Doc, Secret Dad (Cowboys, Doctors...Daddies)

by Lynne Marshall

  “James Monty Sterling.”

  “Monty? You know that’s my dad’s nickname, right?”

  Still staring at the floor, she nodded.

  So that was the one connection she’d kept to his family, and it was only a nickname. He ground his teeth to keep from spitting out the words flying through his head. Anger circled around like a hawk zeroing in on its prey. That urge to bash something with his fist returned, so he shoved his hands deeper into his pockets. “That wasn’t right of you.”

  Her startled look hit him square in the jaw. “It might not have been right, but it’s what I did. I can’t apologize for it, but if you don’t want to hire me, I get it.”

  Could he face her every day, forced to wonder how different the boy’s life would have been if he’d been in it? Would the kid have needed to go to military school if he’d had a father in his life? Why had she held out on him, and could he forgive her? Right now, he wasn’t sure what any of the answers were, but he knew he couldn’t fire her. To spite her, he’d only harm the kid. Instinct told him that wasn’t right.

  She’d come back to her hometown to deal with her parents’ estate, and to put her, uh, their son in military school. All these years, she’d never hit him up for money or support on any level, even knowing his family was well off. There had to be something noble in that, except it was a boneheaded thing to do in the first place. She said she hadn’t wanted to ruin his first year in medical school, yet she’d changed the course of her entire life by taking sole responsibility for the act they’d done together.

  Taking that into account, some of the rage swirling through his mind simmered down.

  Nope, it didn’t seem fair to never know he was a father, but she’d called the shots, and unbeknownst to him he’d stood by in ignorance.

  He could only imagine the nerve it took to drop that bomb, and how she’d had to swallow some major pride to apply for a job in his clinic in the first place. Had he been set up?

  Something about her pouring out her heart to him after all these years, while having borne the burden of being a single parent for a kid who was half as much his as hers, made him zip through what was left of the shocked, angry and accusatory part. Before he realized what he was doing, he dropped to one knee to take her white-knuckle hands in his.

  Her guts at finally telling him overrode his stunned reaction.

  He studied her face. What the hell was he supposed to say?

  “As you can imagine, I need some time to let this news sink in. I’ve never married and don’t have any kids, so the thought of being a father to a nearly thirteen-year-old son is mind-blowing.”

  “I understand.”

  She let him hold her hands, but still didn’t look at him.

  “Your job’s safe.” Hell, he couldn’t very well kick the mother of his child out on the street, could he? Nor did he want to. He’d been anything but honorable way back then, turned out so had she, but that was all history and it couldn’t be changed. Right now was a chance to make up for it, and there was a kid in need of military school at stake. “But honestly, I’m going to need time to figure out what to do about the fatherhood part.”

  “Of course.” Finally she engaged his eyes, looking amazingly earnest and so damn appealing, the expression grabbed his heart and squeezed it. Why did he still feel connected to her? Well, criminy, he was totally bonded to her by a kid, just didn’t know it until now! “I’m fine with keeping this strictly between us for now. I love my son and that will never change, and I don’t expect you to suddenly change your life. I’m just going for full disclosure here. New job and all.”

  He patted her hand, thinking how soft and fragile it was, how right it felt cupped in his palm. “Give me some time to work this through, okay?”

  “Okay, but first you’ve got to understand I’m not asking for anything but this job, Trevor.”

  He nodded. “I believe you.”

  “So let’s just keep this under wraps and move forward with my employment for now—is that okay?”

  “If only it were that easy, Julie, but okay.” He stood, shaking his head like it might help put sense into the latest news. It didn’t. “At some point I’m going to want to meet him. Tell him.”

  “If that time comes, we’ve got to do it together. Promise me that.”

  He nodded. “Okay.”

  She stood. “I won’t force it. Just so you know.”

  He nodded again.

  “So I’ll see you tomorrow morning, then?” A definite tentative tone to her question.

  “Sure.” Still stunned, he didn’t have a clue what to do next, and his mind, in its currently baffled state, wasn’t exactly coming up with anything else to say either.

  Julie headed for the door, her bulky winter coat over her arm, the conservative navy business suit she’d worn fitting her narrow waist and rounded hips perfectly. He glanced at her shapely calves, remembering how he’d liked her legs in short shorts that summer. Man, had that gotten him into trouble…and all these years he’d never even known just how much.

  He scratched his head, curiosity causing him to ask. “Do you have a picture of James?”

  She stopped and turned. “Of course. You want to see him?” A cautious yet agreeable glint in her eyes led to a flicker of that girl from all those summers ago.

  “Please.” All kinds of new feelings buzzed around inside his body; his mind jumped from possibility to implausibility and back. He was a father?

  She dug into her purse and produced a red leather wallet, opened it and immediately found a standard school photo and proudly showed it to him. “He’s tall for his age.”

  He took it. If he’d doubted for one second that he’d actually been the father, he couldn’t very well do it now. And shame on him for even holding out a tiny hope it wasn’t true. The kid staring at him from the picture was a gangly version of himself at twelve or thirteen, but with Julie’s lighter brown, curly hair and freckles over the bridge of his nose. He suppressed his reaction, but was pretty sure she’d already picked up on it. That DNA couldn’t be denied.

  “Thanks.”

  “You want to keep it? I’ve got plenty more.”

  Did he want to take the first step…? Hell, he’d done that thirteen years ago. “Sure. Thanks.” How could he refuse?

  Julie gave a demure yet hopeful smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning, then.”

  He tore his gaze from the photo and exhaled, then watched her walk down the hall to the exit. “I’ll be here.” Then he put the boy’s picture in his desk drawer and closed it.

  What the hell was he supposed to do now?

  *

  Rather than head straight to the house and face his father, since the sun had poked out that afternoon, Trevor decided to take a ride on Zebulon to help work through the residual anger directed at his newest employee. He also needed to check the area that his smartphone mapping app said was down. Until grazing-management technology was able to produce virtual fences and cattle headgear, he’d continue to do things the old-fashioned way—by hand. And today he’d use this possible boundary breach as an excuse to avoid facing his father. Besides, he needed more time to run the latest news through his brain—for about the hundredth time since Julie had told him he was a father.

  He’d come home after graduating from college to help out on the ranch before heading off to medical school. He’d learned to work hard and play hard back then—he’d even finished his undergraduate work in three years instead of the usual four—and every weekend that summer, after helping out on the ranch, he’d hit whichever party in town that had promised the most ladies. Because he’d deserved it. At least, that was what he used to tell himself.

  Sitting atop Zebulon, his buckskin Appaloosa, Trevor felt the frigid air cut through his lungs. He inhaled deeper, hoping the burn might shock some sense into him. Yet so far, he couldn’t get Julie and James Sterling, his ready-made family, out of his mind.

  Back then, the year he’d met her, word had tr
aveled fast in their tiny town, and it had always been easy to find out about the weekend hangouts. It hadn’t taken much to make a party. An old abandoned barn or a campfire ring, some bales of hay to sit on, car radios for music. The gatherings, as they used to call the weekly events, had always been well attended.

  At twenty-one, he hadn’t been a teenager anymore, but he’d gotten used to partying on weekends at the university, so he’d gone. Got treated like near royalty as a college grad, too. And that was the first time he’d noticed Julie. He’d asked one of his buddies who she was and he’d told him she was seventeen and had just graduated from high school. They’d spent most of that summer checking out each other, but something had kept Trevor from approaching her. He hadn’t had any plans that included getting involved with a girl, not back home anyway, and maybe he’d instinctively known she might be trouble. Trouble? With that sweet face and sinful body?

  Oh, yeah, trouble—big trouble. And damned if he hadn’t walked right into it.

  “Will you dance with me?” she’d asked that night, looking all innocent and pretty as summer itself in a little flowery sundress. It had been the last weekend before he was set to leave for Boston University School of Medicine. He’d held out all summer, but something about the way the campfire had outlined her wild hair, making it look golden with shooting solar flares for curls, had made him accept the beer she’d handed him, and the offer to dance. He even remembered thinking, This is probably the dumbest thing I’ve ever done, and yet he hadn’t been able to help himself and had done it anyway. And it had been a slow dance.

  He’d had a couple of beers already; even so he’d known he shouldn’t talk to or dance with this girl, but he hadn’t been able to resist. Not when she’d been right there, smiling so pretty.

  Zebulon stopped without reason, and Trevor snapped out of his memories, realizing they were already at the fence line, and sure enough a couple of posts were down. He texted Jack, the ranch foreman, giving him the location, and waited for his reply.

  And he remembered Julie’s bright, though guarded, eyes from earlier, how they’d still enticed him. How they’d brought back memories of that last summer home before med school, and his taking advantage of the young woman’s willingness that night. How they’d reminded him of innocence, both his and hers. She was right—she could have ruined the life he’d planned if she’d told him about the pregnancy back then. But she hadn’t. That had taken some guts.

  In order to get through her orientation at the clinic, he’d have to turn into the Tin Man. Even now her playful hair and matured features grabbed him in a place he’d rather forget. Yeah, the Tin Man approach was the only ticket regarding her working for him. Good thing his nasty breakup with Kimberley—how she’d dropped him like a bad virus when he’d chosen family medicine over a more prestigious specialty the fourth year of med school—had already taught him how to turn his heart to metal.

  His cell phone blipped, bringing him back to the range. Jack had got the message.

  Normally, Trevor would have thought to bring his fence-repair kit with him, but today he’d been so distracted by Julie’s news, it had taken all his brainpower just to saddle up and mount his horse. He glanced upward to a cloudless sky, then downrange, seeing hundreds of head of cattle roaming on snow-spotted land.

  Getting a girl pregnant hadn’t been his plan that year. Not by a long shot. Hell, he’d just found out the week before his mother had had an abnormal endometrial biopsy and needed more tests. Worrying about her, and about how his first semester in competitive medical school would go, with his big brother’s exceptional brain to compete with, he’d decided to let off some steam that one last weekend, before he’d have to completely buckle down.

  And he’d danced with the girl with wild hair and the biggest eyes he could remember.

  Zebulon whinnied about something, and Trevor glanced up again. Jack was already heading to the fence and had nearly caught up to him. Who knew how long Trevor had been sitting on the range, staring and thinking?

  The man waved as he approached, then stopped. “Thanks for the heads up. We can’t afford to have any more steer wander off. Not with the grey wolves showing up more and more in these parts.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Until we can budget for putting chips in our cattle, we’ll have to manage like we always have.” Branding and fences seemed so far out of date. Jack was in his early forties and kept up with modern ranching trends. Truth was, Tiberius—Monty—Montgomery was old-school, and not the least bit interested in learning new techniques, or utilizing software and technology for running his ranch. The man still insisted on keeping handwritten bookkeeping ledgers, which Trevor would have to transfer to his own computer books when he got home.

  “I’ll talk to Dad again about the cost to chip the cattle, and mention the long-term savings.”

  “You do that. Maybe he’ll listen to you.”

  Trevor seriously doubted it.

  The men smiled at each other and went their separate ways, leaving Trevor to his mind-boggling thoughts. He remembered the exact instant he’d realized Julie was a virgin, he’d stopped thrusting for a moment and looked at her. “Are you sure?” he’d asked. Though she’d grimaced, she’d bucked under his hips, urging him not to stop. He had been soon taken over by his desire; the fact they were having sex while lying in a foot of hay in a barn loft for her first time hadn’t registered. Nope, it was only after they’d snuggled up close afterwards, and he had smelled summer in her hair and sex on her skin, that he’d started to feel guilty. He’d been on the verge of bringing up the subject when two of her friends had called her name at the barn entrance, told her they were leaving and she’d better come with them. Julie had jumped up, thrown on her dress and underwear, then kissed him one last time and disappeared with her girlfriends. That was when their situation had started to sink in.

  No, she wouldn’t see him again.

  She hadn’t had a clue he’d be gone by Monday, yet he’d let her go, then lain there and stared through the cracks in the roof of the barn at the black summer sky, thinking he’d done something he shouldn’t have. Something he’d really enjoyed, but would regret. And he hadn’t even had the decency to see her home.

  Well, at least she hadn’t lost her virginity in the back of the old beat-up car he’d been driving that summer, his brother’s hand-me-down. A barn loft had to be more romantic than that. Right?

  He racked his brain and knew he’d used contraception, just as he had all through college. No girl had gotten pregnant…until Julie.

  Zebulon galloped toward the barn, like a homing pigeon, obviously eager to get brushed and fed. Trevor dismounted his horse and pushed the nagging thought of Julie and that night out of his mind. He should have at least said goodbye to her. It was the decent thing to do. He should have called and told her he was sorry for taking her virginity, too. Yet he’d done neither. Instead he’d left town for med school and never looked back. Soon forgetting all about her and that night.

  Until her name and credentials had come across his desk on a job application.

  His long-overdue apology hadn’t been the least bit honorable. It had been obligatory and smarmy. What a heel he’d turned out to be.

  Trevor walked the path to his home, the only place he’d ever lived, outside college and medical school, and gritted his teeth thinking it would be extra hard to hide his feelings from his father over dinner tonight. But he sure as hell would because this was one topic he did not want to bring up over one of Gretchen’s casseroles.

  But at least by hiring Julie today, he had a chance to make up for taking advantage of her thirteen years ago. There might still be a chance to win back a thread of honor. To meet his son and become the father the kid deserved.

  The thought scared the tar out of him.

  *

  The next morning Julie kept her word and arrived at the clinic fifteen minutes early, butterflies swarming through her insides and gathering in her stomach. Charlotte,
the RN, was there to greet her. Late forties. Graying dull brown hair pulled back tight in a low ponytail. Stocky and average height, wearing a glaring white uniform. Julie surmised the woman loved being a nurse.

  “So you’re our new RNP?” Charlotte shoved out a sturdy and rough hand for a shake. “Nice to meet you. Call me Lotte, like my friends. What do you say I give you a tour of the joint before you shadow Dr. Montgomery?”

  Grateful for putting off facing Trevor for a second time, especially since she could barely sleep last night from thinking of him, Julie smiled. “I’d love to, thanks.”

  Fifteen minutes later, having been shown how each examination room was set up, as well as the procedure room, where the medical supplies and ever-important linens were kept, Julie was escorted back to Trevor’s office.

  “Good morning,” he said, looking intriguing and appealing with a day’s growth of beard. The vision nearly made her stop in her tracks. Then she noticed his wild-eyed glance and understood how deeply she’d rocked his world yesterday.

  Yeah, they both had things to deal with, and working together wouldn’t be easy.

  Julie greeted him with a catch in her breath. Those flashing dark eyes were responsible. As well as the perfectly ironed classic Western shirt. Why did she have to notice?

  She’d taken extra care to wear comfortable yet stylish clothes today. Black slacks with matching low-heeled leather boots, and an ice-blue thin sweater that her hazel eyes would surely pick up the color from. She’d pulled her hair back from her face, with a folded blue, patterned scarf tied at her neck under the hair that dusted her shoulders. It was either that or a dull old black headband, and she’d gone for color and California style. Not that she’d wanted to catch Trevor’s attention or anything.

  These days, in LA, doctors and RNPs no longer wore white coats. She was interested to see if she’d be given one here since studies had shown lab coats carried germs instead of protecting doctors and patients from them.

  Trevor motioned her over. “Let me show you the charting system.”