Love Another Day

by Lexi Blake

  Brody tilted her head up. “That’ll be Penny you’ll be working with. She speaks all the languages. She’s a good one.”

  “Is she part of his fancy-schmancy London team?” Alfi asked.

  Brody groaned and rested his head against hers. “He doesn’t like my new career. Apparently I was supposed to join him in dashing about the globe doing odd jobs, some of which I’m fairly certain involve criminal activities.”

  “Do not…mostly,” Alfi shot back. “My point is, you ran off to England and became a pommy git who can’t even be bothered to call his friends. Or the woman he knocked up. He ain’t ever going to traipse around Africa with you saving babies and stuff. He’s too posh for that.”

  “Shut up, Alfi,” Brody growled. “She’s not marrying you. Leave her be.”

  Steph pulled away, not wanting to, but they’d introduced a word she simply couldn’t handle right now. That word needed to be avoided at all costs. “Could we get back to the actual job at hand? And where’s Nate?”

  “He’s over at the big house with Serena and Adam and Jake.” Brody looked like he wanted to push her, but he seemed to back down. “We’ll go over and get him in a bit, and then I want to talk to you about going to the club tonight.”

  Kai had mentioned that she was welcome at the club. Sanctum. She’d heard a ton about it, but she’d never been inside. Avery was fairly open about the lifestyle and how she and Liam played, but everything Steph knew came from books. The night they’d made Nate had been quick and passionate, but there hadn’t been a lot of D/s. Only the night before had given her a hint of what the lifestyle could offer her.

  She shook her head. “I need to be with Nate.”

  “He’ll be in the daycare with the other kids,” Brody promised. “Wade doesn’t want to split the guards up tonight. If you don’t want to play, we’ll take a couple of movies with us and sit in the conference room, but there’s a big party going on. Don’t you want to have some fun?”

  That kind of fun was dangerous. That kind of fun led to getting naked and giving her body over to her Master. Oh, there it was. She was thinking of Brody that way and she shouldn’t. Though it was only for play. Only for a night.

  She clung to the only reason she could think of to tell him no. “I don’t have the right clothes.”

  “Serena’s going to find something for you. It’s a costume party. It should be loads of fun,” Brody promised.

  “What are you going as? James Bond? Got your martini all ready?” Alfi asked, his voice harsh. “I mean you probably own a tuxedo now.”

  Brody’s eyes rolled in perfect disdain. “Pass out, mate. You would be doing us all a favor.”

  “I’ve the constitution of a rutting rhino. A bit of drink can’t keep me down,” Alfi vowed. “Am I going to this party?”

  “No,” they said at the same time.

  Alfi frowned. “What if I get murdered here?”

  “I’m willing to take that chance,” Brody replied. He pulled his cell phone out. “I’m going to make a few calls and then we’ll go over and pick up Nate. I think we’re having dinner at the main house before we head to the club.”

  “Brody, I think we should talk about this,” she began.

  He leaned over and planted those big, sexy lips right on hers. Any thought of protest fled her brain as she felt his hands cup her neck and his body press to hers. The kiss was swift and devastating, and she was lucky to find her balance when he pulled away. There was the most arrogant smirk on his face as he stared down at her. “Don’t think, luv. Let me take control and I’ll show you what it means.” He started for the kitchen door. “If that one gives you trouble, murder him. He’s not worth it.”

  He was typing on his cell screen as he walked away, and she was left with Alfi and a million questions.

  “Why didn’t you tell me they were speaking Dutch?”

  He shrugged. “Didn’t think about it. That day was a mess, Steph. It all happened so bloody fast and I could barely keep up with it.”

  “I don’t know about that. You were the calm one.”

  He huffed. “I was not. I was terrified. Don’t think because I spent years in the Army that I don’t get scared. Spent half my life scared out of my mind and finding ways to make it look like it don’t matter. That’s how you survive. You were the cold one that day. I barely saw your hands shake until you realized they had Nate. Did you think Keniyah had gotten him out?”

  She nodded. “Yes.”

  “So as long as the nipper was all safe and sound, nothing else mattered, right?”

  “It wasn’t like that. I was very dedicated to making sure no one died.”

  “Anyone but you.” Somehow he made it almost seem like an accusation. “You know protecting everyone was my job. You didn’t let me do my job. You should have told them you were a volunteer and that the doctor was in the city for the day.”

  “And let that man die?”

  Alfi’s hands fisted on the table. “He was going to kill everyone, Steph. That damn journalist didn’t have a chance. He would have been questioned and once the boss had what he wanted, he would have killed him. Then he would have killed us. All you were doing was putting off the inevitable. I could have come up with something, but no, you step up, pretty as you please, and walk into the croc’s mouth.”

  “I couldn’t let him die. Not when I could save him.” She’d taken an oath when she became a doctor and she took it seriously.

  “You couldn’t save him. That’s what I’m telling you,” Alfi shot back.

  She wasn’t sure what his point was or why he was angry with her. “I doubt that me telling that man there was no doctor around would have made him go away.”

  “We’ll never know now, will we? You should have left it to me.” He let his head fall forward. “I thought Anya would get out.”

  Her stomach clenched. “I should have thought about that. I should have stayed there with her or sent her out.”

  Those red-rimmed eyes rolled when he looked back up at her. “God, Steph, does it all have to be about you? Are you the only one in the world who gets to be wrong?”

  “What is that supposed to mean?” She’d never seen Alfi like this. He was always charming. Smarmy at times, but charming. He never raised his voice unless he was playing football with the local kids, and then he merely shouted out encouragements. He was a rogue, no doubt, but she’d never seen him so dark.

  “It’s pretty fucking arrogant, you know. Everything bad is your fault. Like you’re some kind of goddess on earth. It’s not always about you. I can make big fucking mistakes, too.”

  “Well, on that we can agree.”

  “You’re making another one,” Alfi insisted. “If you let that man go, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.”

  “I thought you wanted me for yourself. Which is utterly ridiculous.”

  He shrugged. “Yeah, but now that I’m here and thinking about it right and proper, I can see maybe I was right. Maybe we’re more alike than you and Brody. He spent all that time thinking he was bad for you. Maybe you’re bad for him. Maybe you’re the one who would drag him down and not the other way around.”

  Wow. That hurt more than she’d thought it could. “It’s good to know how you think, Alfi. When all this is over, don’t feel like you need to check in on me again. I’ll be fine.”

  He sighed, a hand scrubbing through his hair. “Damn it, you don’t understand a thing I’m saying. You’ll drag him down into the mud with you because you’re too daft to see that you don’t belong there. You think I didn’t run a check on you? I know all about what happened. I’m sure Brody thinks he knows, too, but I would bet he knows nothing about what you did in the years after the wreck.”

  She felt her whole body flush with shame. “No, I suspect he doesn’t or he wouldn’t think I was too good for him.”

  Alfi groaned. “That’s where you’re underestimating him. He won’t care. He won’t care how many men you tore through trying to forget. He won�
��t care what drugs you did in an insane attempt to make things right with the universe because you think someone somewhere got it all wrong. He won’t care what you did in the past. He’ll try to make it so you never feel that way again. He’ll love you if you let him and when that man loves… I’ve never known a better man than Brody Carter, and that’s why I wanted to take you from him. I thought if I could make you love me instead, maybe I’d be more like him. I ain’t going to change, luv. I’m going to die exactly who I am right now—a good for nothing player, but I do care about him. If you’re not going to change, then you should walk away from him.”

  That was the whole problem she found herself faced with now. “I can’t walk away from him. We have a child. And I have changed. I don’t do self-destructive things anymore. I’m over that.”

  “You have a child who almost got killed out there, so I beg to differ. I watched you. You didn’t care about anything until you realized Nate wasn’t safe.”

  He wasn’t right. She didn’t believe it. “I did, too. I cared about everyone in that clinic.”

  “Not yourself. You didn’t give a bloody damn about yourself, and that’s what will kill Brody. His brother died and I thought he would lay down and die with him. What’s going to happen when the only woman he’s ever loved dies because she needs to martyr herself more than she needs to live?”

  “Hey, I think you should go sleep it off, mate. Now.” Brody was standing in the doorway, a forbidding expression on his face.

  “I’ve said what I needed to say.” Alfi stood up and made his way to the door. “I’ll bunk in with the crazy one. Tucker whatever his name is.”

  “Why did you come here, Alfi?” Brody asked.

  Alfi stopped, one hand on the door, holding it open. “Didn’t know where else to go. If everyone I know is going to get themselves murdered, thought I probably should, too.”

  He walked out, but Steph still felt a hole in her gut.

  “What did he say to you?” Brody asked. “I didn’t catch anything but his tone and the look on your face. Should I talk to him?”

  She shook her head. “No. He didn’t say anything I didn’t already know. I’m going to get Nate.”

  “I’ll go with you.”

  “I can handle it.”

  He stepped in front of her, looming large. “Sweetheart, he said something that upset you. I wish you would talk to me about it. He’s pissed. You can’t listen to him.” One big hand came out to smooth back her hair. “He’s also jealous as hell. I can’t blame him. You’re a beautiful woman.”

  Tears sparked behind her eyes. “I can’t do this with you right now.”

  “Do what?” He moved closer, drawing her in. “Do this? Take comfort from someone who cares about you? You had a rough day. Let me take care of you. You can’t be all wound up around our boy. He’ll sense it and it’ll affect him, too. Come here and let me take some of this burden from you.”

  She was enveloped in his arms again and she couldn’t find the will to break away. He was right. It had been a shitty day at the end of a string of shitty days, and he was safety and warmth and pleasure all wrapped up in one gorgeous man package. Despite the fact that Alfi’s words and what she’d realized in the shrink’s office that day were plaguing her brain, she couldn’t force herself to move away from him.

  “That’s better. That makes me feel better,” he whispered against her ear. “I had a nice day with Nate. He’s a good kid. I might have called my mum and told her about him. Took a couple of pictures and texted her. I hope you don’t mind.”

  Those stupid tears were playing at the corners of her eyes again. “She’s his grandmother. She should know he’s alive. I never…”

  “Shh, I know you never tried to keep him from me, but I’m stepping light here. You’ve had all the responsibility for two months, and I can’t come in and ride roughshod over you. I should have asked, but I wanted to talk to her. I didn’t know what to do with the tube of white stuff and then Tucker opened it and it got all over him and it wouldn’t come off.”

  She laughed at the thought. “It’s diaper rash ointment. It’s not easy to get off. He’s like a large puppy, you know.”

  “You’re telling me,” he replied. “Mum cried. Said he looks just like me. Said you deserve a medal for pushing out that…well, she’s got a mouth on her.”

  “For pushing a giant baby through my hoo haw? I got a mouth on me, too, and it was horrible. I have no idea how I managed that. Could you make smaller babies?”

  “I’ll try,” he promised.

  She started to pull back, realizing what she’d said. “Brody, I didn’t mean that.”

  He held her close. “I know. I’m not taking anything seriously. You need time and I’m going to give it to you, but Stephanie, we’re stuck together for a while. We’re going to be living in the same house, spending a lot of time together until this gets sorted out. There’s no reason for us to not sleep together and play together and be kind to each other. Can we do that? No expectations of what happens when the case is done and you’re safe.”

  She wanted to believe him. “None?”

  “None except that I want to be in his life. I want to be his dad. God, Steph, I didn’t think I wanted kids until I picked him up and held him. Now there’s nothing I want more than to be around him.”

  “Of course, but I have to go back and you’ll be in London.” Did she have to go back? That part of her that had held things together for the last decade screamed yes. She’d promised Avery that she would do good.

  Avery thought she could do good here.

  “We’ll talk about that when the time comes,” he promised. “For now, we’re not going to look past tonight and having a good time while we wait to see what happens next. Can you do that with me?”

  She should say no. She needed to listen to what Alfi had said. Maybe he was right and she was the one who wasn’t good enough for Brody. Distance. She needed some, but she still found herself lifting her head and nodding. “Only while we’re stuck here.”

  “Only while we’re stuck here,” he agreed.

  So why did being stuck here suddenly seem like something she could do for a very long time?

  Chapter Ten

  A few hours later he stood outside the locker room, waiting for that moment when she would walk out and he would get a glimpse of her.

  Alfi, the fucker, had at least one brilliant idea.

  “Nice tux.” Big Tag strode out wearing a long blond wig, red bandana, and leather pants. “You a maître d?”

  “You a heroin addict?” He could give as well as he got.

  “Definitely at some point.” And Big Tag could take what he shoveled out. “Dude, I’m Axl Rose. Do you know who that is? Do they have music in Australia? I know they have that diggery doo thing, but I’m talking about rock ’n’ roll.”

  “It’s a didgeridoo and I might have heard of Guns N’ Roses somewhere.” He wasn’t giving Tag anything. He was too happy tonight. Steph was here and he got to play with her all night long. Or at least until the party was over and they had to pick up their kiddo and head home.

  Yeah, he liked that thought, too.

  “Got to love a costume party.” Tag patted him on the shoulder. “You sure about that other guy?”

  There was only one person he could be talking about. Alfi. Well, he might be talking about Tucker, but Brody doubted it. “Am I sure about him? I’m sure he’s an arsehole. Do I think he’ll hurt someone? No. I’ve known Alfi all my life. He’ll do a lot of stupid things but he’s never cruel. He can be mercenary, but if he truly understands how he’s hurting someone, he’ll stop. He’s angry with me.”

  “Because you walked away after your brother died?”

  Naturally Tag knew about that, but then he would have done a thorough investigation before he brought Brody on the team. “Alfi thinks I abandoned him. I had a shot at getting out of the Army. He reupped because he thought I would. Spent another year in while I kind of roamed the world until
I met Walt.”

  And Walt had led him to a ship called the Royale and the Taggarts. And they had led him to his home in London and the job that brought him to Steph.

  “Any reason you didn’t tell him?” Taggart asked.

  He sighed because he was done lying to himself. “Yeah, chaos follows Alfi and I needed a couple of months of peace. I had to figure a few things out. I grew up with that man, but sometimes it’s hard to be his friend. He can be very self-centered, and he doesn’t always see it. I’m not saying he’s a bad guy. But he’s difficult. We weren’t on the same team. Even when we were in the Army we wouldn’t see each other except when we were on leave or happened to find ourselves on the same base.”

  “Was the Army good for him?”

  “Kept him out of trouble for the most part,” Brody admitted. “But I don’t know how to deal with the fact that he didn’t tell me about Nate.”

  “You know what would make you feel better?”

  Brody could think of a few things. “Hanging him by his arms and slowly feeding him feet first into a vat of piranhas? Or lowering him into a nice pool that contains that South American worm thing that slips up a man’s willy and hooks his way in?”

  “Dude, that’s brilliant.” Taggart pulled out his mobile, touching the screen. “Note to self, arrange to buy South American penis barb worm and slip it into Adam’s daily rose-scented bath. I’m sure he has one.” He clicked it off. “I like you, Carter. You’re mean. I was merely going to suggest negotiating a series of punches or bitch slaps to be used randomly over the next couple of years. Made me feel better about Ten. Friends are hard things. Women are even harder. Ah, you’re Pierce Craig. I should have known. Steph, you make a lovely Genie. You know Geneva Peretti is based on Charlie, right?”

  Brody’s breath caught because Steph had walked out and she was wearing a teeny tiny white bikini that showed off her graceful figure. On her right thigh there was a holster that held a wicked knife. He figured she was a surgeon so he didn’t have to find a fake knife.