Faded in to You

by Remmy Duchene

  Yes, after the wedding, he really needed to get the hell out of Dodge. Love didn’t seem as if it was in the cards for him and he had to accept that. Away from Darius’ and Alfred’s adoration for each other, he’d be able to heal and come to terms with what was raving inside him.

  Early the next morning, he got the phone call he’d been waiting for. The deal was he could take three weeks’ vacation to attend Alfred’s wedding, but they needed him as soon as he could manage it. The company had gone through a terrible hack and they were rebuilding. He sympathized with that and the honest truth was, Ravinder needed to get away.

  “So, you’re going to leave now?” Lana Jeffries asked, beating some eggs in a large bowl.

  “Yeah. I kinda have to,” Ravinder said, reading the email the company had sent him with his revised offer. “All that’s really left to do is for Alfred and Darius to decide on wine. Everything else is ready. I’m going to have to do my fitting earlier than the others but I don’t see a problem—unless I gain a hundred pounds in India.”

  Lana sighed. “You know I’ll be over there all the time, right?”

  “You’d better,” Ravinder said.

  In the last year, he’d gotten so close to Lana. The two had met their final year in the Communications Studies program at university. He always wondered why the fates hadn’t allowed them to meet sooner. In reality, the reason was simple—Lana was a transfer into his program.

  “And I’ll take great care of this place,” Lana said.

  In fact, she was doing Ravinder a favor. He had a thing about strangers in his home and he didn’t want to sell it, so Lana had volunteered to move in and pay the mortgage in the form of rent and deal with any utilities. That, in itself, was an awesome deal.

  “So, I’ll pay all the bills until you’re supposed to move in, since you can’t just break your lease at the other place,” Ravinder explained. “Then, when you move in, you can take over.”

  She nodded. “I’m glad to be doing this. I’ll be able to save for my own place. If all stays on track, it will be in this building—can you believe the views?”

  Ravinder grinned. He’d like that.

  The two got through breakfast then went out to buy a few things Ravinder would need to take with him to India. He’d gotten permission to ship things he would want and the company would have a representative carry them over to the house the company had rented for him to stay in while he was in the country. They did just that—sending over two large boxes of new clothes, including suits and jeans as well as shirts, ties and knick-knacks.

  Lana kissed him on the cheek and headed into her office, and he was left to his own devices. His first stop was to find Alfred. His best friend wasn’t home so, sitting on the hood of his car, he called him.

  “Hey!” Alfred greeted. “What’s up?”

  “Got some news about that job.”

  “Yeah?”

  “I leave next week—but I’ll be back for three weeks for your wedding.”

  Alfred was silent for a second. “Oh, okay. As long as you’re back for the big day, man. This is your dream job.”

  “Can we have a night together before I leave?” Ravinder asked. “Just you and me, like old times?”

  “You don’t even have to ask that, Rav. You know that.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Seriously, are you okay? I know I’ve been kind of preoccupied with starting the studio and planning the wedding. I haven’t really been there for you through all of this.”

  Ravinder smiled and shook his head. “Nah, man. Life’s a bitch sometimes and more often than not it gets in the way of other things.”

  “That’s true, but still. When I was going through it, you were always there for me.”

  Rubbing his eyes, Ravinder let himself into his car. “That’s not how it works. Gimme a call when you have some free time and we’ll plan something. I’m about to drive, so we’ll talk later.”

  “Rav…”

  “Call me later.”

  He hung up and, for a silent breath, he just sat in Alfred’s driveway meditating on how much things had changed between them. He was being childish, he knew that. But Ravinder still felt alone and sad. Sure, he didn’t need a man to define him, but Ravinder still craved that companionship. Going to India wouldn’t be any easier on him since he wasn’t at all clear on the real status of the LGBTQQ2A population in the country. Sure, he’d heard the news and the rumors, but until he was there, there was no telling what was what.

  Pulling himself together, Ravinder headed back into the middle of town to stop at the passport office.

  Chapter Two

  Thaddeus Masterson walked out of the FBI building in New York City and pulled the collar of his designer coat together. Somehow, in the midst of a horrible winter season, he’d forgotten his scarf at home. It was no big deal, however, since he was going from the building to his car. It was just annoying. His meeting had run later than it should have and now he was late for lunch with his best friend.

  The cold air hit him like a slap in the face. He chewed his bottom lip as he used a hand to rub one cheek then the next. Ever since he was a child, Thaddeus never liked the winter. His parents moved him to Brooklyn from Jamaica when he was ten and he’d had a hate-hate relationship with the season since then. They didn’t care. They didn’t seem to mind that the winter caused his skin to strip, that the air burned his nose until it bled. His mother always said, “I don’t care. Go to school.”

  Thaddeus shook his head. That was a time in his life he really hated remembering. His childhood hadn’t been a great one—he had the scars to prove it. It was the reason, the moment he could, he left New York and only returned when the FBI needed his help with something. It seemed lately he was there more than he was in Bathsheba.

  Glancing over his shoulder, he was about to continue on his way when he looked down. Thaddeus knew the moment he stepped off the last stair that he’d have snow up past his ankles. He removed his gloves then shoved them into his pockets and set to work tucking the legs of his pants into his boots. Once he was done, he put the gloves back on and zipped his coat up the rest of the way.

  Thaddeus checked his watch and muttered a profanity under his breath before quickening his steps to his car. Because of ice forming under loose snow, he slipped a few times, but managed to catch himself without falling. When he was finally in the safety of his vehicle, he turned the engine on and, while it warmed up, he called his friend.

  It took a few tries before Ko Takao picked up. “Yo! Ade!”

  Thaddeus grinned. Ko was the only person on the face of the earth who would think to call him that. “Hey, I’m running late.”

  “Meeting with Rodriquez went over again?”

  “You know it.” Thaddeus leaned forward to wipe at the frost on his windshield. “This is the last case I’ll be helping him with anyway. He’s being promoted. But I’m coming.”

  “Take your time. There’s a sexy new waiter who’s keeping me company.”

  “Lord have mercy.” Thaddeus palmed his face. “Behave yourself.”

  “Behaving is for chumps.” Ko laughed. “I’ll see you when you get here.”

  With their conversation over, Thaddeus hung up and dropped the cell on the passenger seat. He watched the blue letters appear in the dashboard stereo system, explaining to him that the phone was being synced with it. Once it was finished, Thaddeus turned on the heat to defrost the front and back windows.

  He felt better knowing Ko knew he would be late. When he could see out of the front and back of the luxury SUV, he eased from the parking spot and left the lot. He headed southeast on Worth Street toward Lafayette. With one hand on the steering wheel, he used the other to push a CD into the stereo. Omen by Disclosure featuring Sam Smith started blaring from the speakers. Though he had to move slowly behind the long line of vehicles on the unplowed road and that called for something a little less pumping, Thaddeus let the song play.

  The song ended before he
was anywhere near the bridge. Usually, the drive from the FBI building would take him about four minutes, but, with traffic, everything was moving slower than a snail’s pace. Still, he continued until he reached where Lafayette turned into Center Street and it was another eight minutes before he hit the Brooklyn Bridge.

  The traffic didn’t get any better. It was as though people had never seen or driven in snow before. One driver pushed his car in between Thaddeus and the truck before him and almost caused an accident. Thaddeus ground his teeth. Still, he tried remaining calm by cranking his music and bopping his head to the beat of Jamie Woon’s Sharpness.

  When he finally reached Ko, it was an hour after he was supposed to meet with him. Still, the two hugged and Thaddeus peeled himself out of his designer jacket. After hanging it on the back of his chair, Thaddeus fell into his seat to remove his gloves and set them on the table beside his menu. The waiter appeared at their sides and left again after Thaddeus ordered a bowl of soup.

  Thaddeus grinned. “That him?”

  Ko nodded, leaning to the side of his chair, no doubt to check out the twink’s ass.

  “Why do you do these things?” Thaddeus laughed.

  “What?” Ko looked incredulous. “Don’t you think he’s fine?”

  Thaddeus shrugged. “Not bad, if you’re into that sort of thing.”

  “Listen, not all of us can handle your kind of booty, okay?” Ko joked as he righted himself in his chair. “Some of us require the supple, hard flesh of a…twink.”

  Thaddeus arched an eyebrow. “Since when?”

  Ko grinned. “Look, all I’m trying to say is that when it comes to men, I don’t discriminate.”

  “Right.”

  “How was your meeting?” Ko asked.

  “Same old. These new hackers are a joke. It took them almost ten years to bust me. Now, they’re getting them in a few hours.”

  “Yeah, well, you were an ass.”

  Thaddeus chuckled.

  “It seems a little weird that the FBI doesn’t have someone talented enough to get them.” Ko’s shoulders rose and fell. “You can’t keep doing this, Ade. It’s not safe.”

  “After Roddie, I’m done,” Thaddeus told him. “I’m focusing on business now. I’m done with the whole black-hat bullshit.”

  Ko nodded as the waiter returned with Thaddeus’ soup. They placed their meal orders, and when he’d finally gotten some soup into him, Thaddeus smiled and eased back into his chair.

  “I hate this weather.”

  Ko laughed. “I remember. You still get nose bleeds from it?”

  “Not sure.” Thaddeus instinctively swiped a finger under his nose. “Thankfully, not today.”

  “That’s a way to look at it.” Ko laughed.

  Thaddeus crinkled his nose. He finished his soup around chitchat before wiping his mouth with his napkin. “I’ve been so tired lately,” he admitted. “I can’t sleep at nights, either, so I wander the house like a damn lost spirit.”

  “Are you eating late again?”

  “Not usually. I have so much on my mind. Besides, every time I fall asleep, I have these nightmares that scare the shit out of me.”

  Ko tilted his head. “What about?”

  “I don’t know. That’s the messed-up thing. I can’t remember them. All I know is I wake up in cold sweats, just shouting.”

  “Could it be your time in lock-up?”

  Thaddeus shook his head. “There was nothing traumatic about that. I was in there for three weeks before my deal went through and I was free. Besides, that was, like, twenty years ago.”

  “Um… I don’t know. Try remembering them. Maybe they mean something. Or maybe you should take a vacation. It’s been a while. After you created Rose Linx, you kind of just fell into work.”

  “Yeah. It was giving me the break I needed from looking over my shoulders all the time.” Thaddeus took another spoonful of soup. “I mean, after I started putting my life back together, freelancing and all that, I kept thinking all these guys I helped put away would come after me.”

  “Okay, but they didn’t know who helped the feds. Besides, it’s not like you had a choice in the matter. It was either help or go to prison. I would have done the same thing.”

  “I guess. A part of me felt bad, you know? Betraying all those other black-hats.”

  “But you’ve changed, Ade. You became a white-hat, helping out those people who needed help testing their security systems—you haven’t done any black-hat work in years now. No more feeling bad.”

  Thaddeus smiled and nodded. “Ever been to the Bahamas?”

  “Not yet. Why? What are you thinking?”

  “I need to thaw out. And since I can basically work from anywhere, why not from a beach in the Bahamas?”

  “Okay? When were you thinking of going?”

  “Don’t know. Soon.”

  “I can’t leave yet. I’m still building my newest line and it’s at that time when leaving is the exact wrong thing to do. I could meet you down there.”

  “Yeah, I guess…” The ringing of his phone interrupted their talk and he glanced at it. “It’s Paresh.”

  “As in Mitra?”

  Thaddeus nodded.

  “You’d better take that.”

  Thaddeus cleared his throat and set his napkin on the table. “Hello, Masterson.”

  “Thaddeus, hi. You got a minute to talk?” Paresh Mitra asked.

  “Um…” Thaddeus eyed Ko, who nodded. “Sure, I take it this is not a social call.”

  “No. I’m in some trouble right now and I need your expertise.”

  “What kind of trouble?”

  “Well,” Paresh said. “We were hacked. It’s bad. We’ve lost a good eighty percent of our clients. We’ve been trying to clean up the system, but the virus they left behind is even worse than we thought. I hired a PR person to help us out. Not much has been done since he only started last week and…”

  “What system were you using?”

  “Cyprek.”

  Thaddeus sighed. “I installed Rose Linx when you hired me.”

  “You did. But the shareholders weren’t sure they trusted it, so we had to uninstall it.”

  Thaddeus rolled his eyes. “Once Cyprek is compromised, there’s no reinstalling it without flushing the system completely. You might as well throw out your servers and buy a new set.”

  “We realized that.”

  “No,” Thaddeus said. “I don’t think you get it. You can’t just fix this issue by scrubbing it. You have to basically start from scratch.”

  “That’s why I’m calling you. I need you to rebuild us and set us up with a security system that’s top notch. We also need our guys trained to maintain the system and to keep this from happening again—if we survive this financially.”

  “I…”

  “I will pay you, Thaddeus. Whatever you want. Name your price. I’m desperate.”

  Thaddeus sighed. The server brought their meals, and Thaddeus mouthed a thank you to him then refocused on the conversation. “Let me talk to a few people and get back to you. I’ll call you later.”

  “All right. Thanks, man.”

  Thaddeus grunted and hung up.

  “Sounds bad.”

  “It is. They uninstalled Rose Linx and put in Cyprek. Because I used to be a black-hat, they didn’t want anything to do with me or my program. Now some asshole hacked in and basically took down the whole firm.”

  “Now they need you—go figure.” Ko frowned. “I’m confused. Wouldn’t a program created by one of the best black-hats in the world be the one you want to use?”

  “I don’t know what to tell you.”

  “So, no Bahamas?”

  Thaddeus was suddenly not hungry anymore. “I guess not. A part of me wants to tell him to figure this shit out himself.”

  “But that’s not who you are.”

  Thaddeus sighed and shoved a piece of carrot into his mouth. Ko was right. He couldn’t just leave Paresh dangling. “I’m goi
ng to head over there. Hopefully I can finish before Darius’ wedding.”

  “They’re still together?” Ko asked.

  “Yeah. They love each other, man. We all want to find what they have.”

  “Even you?”

  “Sure. I mean I probably don’t deserve it, but we’d all like to think there’s someone special out there for each of us, no matter how big an asshole we are.”

  Ko nodded, but Thaddeus could see in his eyes that Ko wasn’t too keen on that way of thinking. Still, they switched their conversation from love to his upcoming trip to India.

  After lunch with Ko and promising he wouldn’t leave without telling him, Thaddeus headed back to his place. He tossed his jacket over the back of a chair and started up his computer. He checked the figures of Rose Linx and smiled. He called Paresh then and accepted the job. At the end of the call, his computer notified him that he had an email. It was Paresh with a contract and details about the other benefits of working for them—a house, a car with a driver—the works.

  He smirked.

  “Good old, reliable Thaddeus,” he muttered, reading the contract. “Can always depend on him to do the right thing.”

  Chapter Three

  Ravinder wanted to hit the ground running when he finally made it to Chhatrapati Shivaji International Airport. This would be his first freelance contract and he aimed to make a great impression. Who knew? If he did a good enough job, maybe they’d offer him a contract to stay longer, or put in a good word when he began seeking another job. Yes, those were two of the main reasons to kick some serious ass with this company.